Builder Bear

by Raines, Harmony

  “Isn’t that enough?” Tiana teased.

  “No.” She frowned. “Maybe, yes.”

  “Because knowing a man for months or years doesn’t make any difference, does it?” Tiana voiced Haley’s own thoughts.

  “No, it does not.” She slowed before turning onto a back road that led to the house. “I’ve never thought about having another child. I love Alicia and Marie so much. I wouldn’t want them to feel left out.”

  “Rhett doesn’t feel left out over this baby.” Tiana slid her hand over her swollen belly.

  “You don’t think that’s part of the reason he’s come home?”

  “No. Not because he’s left out. Not in that way. It’s because he saw himself as the man of the house for so long. After Quentin left, he tried to help as much as he could. Now he thinks he’s abandoning me. Which he isn’t.”

  “Do you think this year off will put things in perspective for him?” Haley asked as they reached the house.

  “I hope so. Although I’m not going to pressure him. I want him to be happy and make his own decisions. He’s not a child anymore. He knows his own mind.”

  “Really?” Haley asked. “Because even at my age, I don’t know my own mind.”

  “I still feel like a kid,” Tiana confessed as she undid her seatbelt and groaned. “I don’t think I have the energy to get out of the car. Maybe I should just sleep here.”

  “You are not doing a good job of encouraging me to have a child,” Haley told her.

  “I’m beginning to think it’s not such a good idea,” she confessed.

  Haley giggled. “Too late now. That baby has to come out. One way or another.” Haley opened her car door and then went around to the passenger side. “And so do you.”

  Haley held out her hand and Tiana took it. “I feel like a beached whale.”

  “And you are encouraging me to have another baby!” Haley said as she pulled Tiana gently out of the car.

  Tiana stood for a moment, her eyes misted with tears as she tried to compose her thoughts. “I suppose I don’t want to do this alone. I’m an older mother. It would be just amazing to be surrounded by my best friends, to go through motherhood with you and Sorcha.”

  Tears pricked Haley’s eyes and she wrapped her arms around Tiana and held her close. “If you put it like that.” The two friends stood together as the moon shone down on them from the clear night sky. They had both reached a new phase in their lives and Haley had to admit the thought of being a mother again did have some appeal.

  “No pressure,” Tiana said. “But think about it. I know Buck will be happy either way.”

  “But procreation is a thing for shifters, isn’t it?” Haley asked, remembering when shifters were all so new to Tiana. She would share all the snippets of information she’d gleaned about them from Mason, until Haley and Sorcha knew about as much as everyone else.

  At that time, Haley had no idea that her own life would become entangled with shifters in such a way. However, she only had to watch the way Mason treated Tiana to understand how much his mate and now their unborn child meant to him. No doubt Buck would feel the same. But Haley didn’t want to have a baby just to make everyone else happy or to feel loved and cherished.

  A baby was for life. It was one of, if not the biggest decision of your life.

  “Buck will be happy either way,” Tiana told Haley. “You know that.”

  “Do I?” Haley asked. “I don’t want to let him down.”

  Tiana gave a short laugh. “The only way that will ever happen is if you don’t let him into your life or your heart. You are his world now. Kids are just the icing on the cake.”

  A ripple of laughter reached them as they walked around the side of the house. On the back lawn, by the light of a campfire, two bears wrestled on the ground. “I think I already have another child,” Haley said drily.

  Buck looked up, his eyes fixed on her. At least she presumed it was Buck. Both bears were approximately the same size, and both had dark brown hair, with sliver tips. As the light from the fire washed over them they seemed to glow, ethereal and unreal.

  “What are you two doing?” Tiana chastised and went to Mason and knelt on the grass, stroking his face.

  Buck came closer to Haley but stopped a few feet away, as if unsure. Haley took a step toward him, wanting to reassure him she wasn’t afraid. Even if her stomach gurgled with nerves. This was a bear. A real live bear. There was nothing soft and cuddly about his massive jaws, or his sharp claws.

  “Hi.” She waved her hand at him, feeling pathetic.

  Buck sat down on his haunches and tilted his head to look at her. She took another step closer and then another until she was by his side and then she dropped to her knees and plunged her hands into his fur.

  “He’s amazing, isn’t he?” Marie came to sit next to her mom on the grass.

  “I guess he is,” Haley agreed.

  “I rode him.” Marie stroked his head, her trust in Buck’s bear complete.

  “Hey there, Mom,” Alicia came over to join them. “I saved you some food. We cooked jacket potatoes on the fire, there’s salad, too.”

  “Thanks, honey, I am starving.” She leaned forward and pressed her lips to the hard-bony part of the bear’s skull before she stood up. “Are you going to finish your fight?”

  The bear shook his head and stood up, shaking himself before the air filled with static electricity and the bear disappeared from her vision, to be replaced by Buck.

  Haley stood with her mouth open, staring at the man before her. It was as if someone had done a magic trick before her eyes. But this wasn’t magic, this was real.

  Buck was real. His love was real. And she hoped she would be able to return the look of love that was in his eyes.

  Chapter Eight – Buck

  “Hi.” He stood staring at her like a demented fool.

  “Hi.” She smiled at him bashfully. Then her stomach rumbled, and she laughed.

  “Come on, Mom, come and eat.” Alicia guided her mom toward the campfire and Buck followed.

  “You survived the afternoon together,” Haley stated as she sat down, and Alicia thrust a plate toward her. “This looks wonderful.”

  “I helped cook the potatoes,” Alicia said proudly.

  “I cut up the salad,” Marie chimed in.

  “You both did great,” Buck said. It was if they were closing ranks on him now that Haley was here. The easiness that had existed between them was evaporating.

  “Only because you lit the fire,” Marie said, perhaps realizing they were shutting him out.

  “And Marie said Buck gives the best bear rides,” Alicia told Haley.

  “It sounds as if you all had fun. I’m sorry I missed it.” Haley gave Buck a grateful smile.

  “We missed you, too,” Marie said, and flung her arms around Haley’s neck.

  Haley hugged Marie back. “Are you ready for bed?”

  “Nearly,” Marie admitted, looking tired.

  “All that fresh air has them tired out,” Rhett said as he came and sat down with them.

  “Hi, Rhett. How are you this evening?” Haley asked.

  “I’m good. Really good. This is just what I needed. I thought Mom would be mad at me for wanting to drop out,” he confided.

  “Mom’s tend to want their kids to be happy above all else,” Haley confided.

  “And kids tend to want their parents to be happy, too,” Rhett said in return, casting a look at Alicia and Marie.

  “We do,” Alicia replied, leaning her head on her mom’s shoulder.

  Somehow, Haley managed to eat her food, but she looked tired, as if each mouthful was an effort to eat. Meanwhile, Buck couldn’t take his eyes off her as the glow from the fire illuminated her face. He longed to have some time alone with her. To hold her and talk to her.

  It would be the perfect finish to a perfect day.

  “Why don’t you two go and get ready for bed, we can sit around the campfire in our sleeping bags and tel
l ghost stories.” Rhett stood up and made ghostlike noises which sent the girls into a fit of giggles as they ran for the house.

  “Alone at last,” Haley said, moving closer to Buck.

  “Alone at last,” he repeated. Why did he get so tongue-tied when he was around Haley? Words had never been his thing, but normally he could at least string a sentence together.

  “I want to thank you. For everything,” she said, putting her plate down on the ground next to her.

  “You don’t have to thank me, I enjoyed it. I can’t remember the last time I had so much fun.” He slid closer to her. “You have wonderful kids.”

  “I do,” she admitted with a smile, gazing into the fire. “They’re the reason I get up in the morning. They’re the reason I keep plowing on.” Haley picked up a stick and prodded the fire, making it spark and crackle.

  “It must have been tough,” Buck said with sympathy.

  “Bringing them up alone?” She nodded. “It had some moments I’d rather not relive. But there have also been moments I would not trade for the world. Christmas mornings with few presents but more love than a house can hold. We’ve learned what matters in life.”

  “Not everyone gets to see that. They don’t get to see how love and friendship matter.” Buck had been one of those people for the longest time. “As a child, I was surrounded by love, but I got older and lonelier and then my dad died. I moved back home to keep my mom company.” He gave a short laugh. “I was nearly forty, ran my own construction company, had a penthouse suite and I moved back to the house I grew up in.” He looked deep into the fire, remembering those days. Going home was the best thing he ever did, even if it was for a terrible reason. He vividly remembered his mom’s endless tears over the loss of his father.

  “Is your mom still with us?” Haley asked quietly.

  He shook his head and picked at the grass, fighting his emotions. “No, she passed five years ago. I always look back and think it was a good thing my dad went first, he was a shifter. I don’t think he would ever have survived a day, let alone four years without my mom.”

  “Is that what happens to all shifters if their mate dies?” Haley asked quietly.

  “Yes. They waste away.” He gave a sorrowful sigh and threw the blades of grass at the fire. “My mom used to visit his grave every week. Roses, they were his favorite and she would place them on the grave and sit there talking to him just as we are talking now.”

  Haley wiped her finger under her eye. “They were very close.”

  “They were.” He shrugged. “They’re together now.” He tilted his head up and looked at the amazing array of stars above their heads. “I often think they’re up there somewhere, looking down on me.”

  Haley brushed her hand over his hair and down his back, and he shivered, heat growing inside him at her touch. “They must be very proud.”

  “I hope so. But they taught me it’s people that matter in this life we lead, not material things. So if they are proud of me, this would be the moment they would be most proud of.” He glanced sideways at her. “Sorry, this is turning into a melancholy evening.”

  “Don’t apologize. I want to get to know you. Everything about you.” She ducked her head. “Does this feel weird to you?”

  “Which part, your daughter riding on my back and asking if I can jump a log like a real pony, or being here with my mate after waiting so long?” He shook his head. “It’s been quite an eventful day.”

  “I was thinking of how we’re supposed to simply accept that we’re going to spend the rest of our lives together.”

  “That’s the easy part for me,” Buck answered honestly. “From the moment I saw you, I knew you were the one for me.”

  “And who are we to argue with fate?” Haley asked absently.

  “Do you want to argue with fate?” Buck asked, scared she might answer yes.

  “No, not really.” She gave a short, humorless laugh. “Maybe fate will have more success choosing a husband for me than I had choosing one for myself.”

  “Do you want to talk about it?” Buck asked tenderly, sensing her inner sadness.

  “Maybe one day soon. But not tonight.” She hugged her knees to her. “The night is clear, the stars are bright, and we’re sitting around a campfire. I don’t want thoughts of my ex-husband to spoil it. Goodness knows he’s spoiled enough for us over the years.”

  “I’m sorry.”

  Haley turned to look at him, resting her head on her knees. “It wasn’t your fault. Tiana will tell me it wasn’t anyone’s fault, but that’s harder to believe.”

  “I wish I’d met you sooner.”

  “You mean you wished you’d saved me from ever marrying him?” Haley asked.

  “I suppose I do.”

  Haley looked up as her two daughters came across the grass carrying hot chocolate in a mug. Mason and Tiana followed behind, each carrying two mugs. “But then I wouldn’t have Marie and Alicia, and I would not change that for the world. Sometimes you have to put up with the crap, you know?”

  “I do.” He accepted a mug of hot chocolate from Mason. “Thanks.”

  “You’re welcome.” Mason sat down on the opposite wide of the fire, and Tiana joined him after passing a cup of hot chocolate to Haley.

  “This is so nice,” Tiana said. “It’s been a while since we were all here together.”

  Rhett sat down next to his mom. “I want to say how much I love you all. You’re all family to me.”

  “To family,” Haley said and raised her cup before taking a sip. “Oh, that is good.”

  “I can’t remember the last time I had hot chocolate and whipped cream,” Buck said, sipping his drink. “And I don’t think I’ve ever tasted anything so good.”

  “Mom’s secret recipe,” Rhett told Buck. “It’s the best thing I’ve ever tasted.”

  They all sat around and talked as the fire burned down and they drank their hot chocolate. Then it was time for teeth to be brushed. Afterward, the girls and Rhett went to their tents, which were close enough together that they could still talk while they were in bed.

  “Please don’t tell any really scary stories,” Tiana told Rhett as they said goodnight. “We don’t need nightmares, this is supposed to be a fun night.”

  “Trust me, Mom,” Rhett said, and the meaning in his voice went deeper than scary ghost stories.

  “I do trust you.” Tiana kissed his head. “But I also know what kids are like when they get together.”

  “I’m not a child,” Rhett reminded her.

  “You’ll always be my child,” Tiana replied as she walked slowly away from the tents where the kids were sleeping and went to check on Haley who was getting into bed, while Buck put the fire out and made sure everything was safe.

  He wasn’t exactly stalling, but he wanted to make sure that everyone was settled before he went to bed. Not that anything would happen between him and Haley. But he wanted their time together to be intimate all the same. He’d already guessed that these quiet moments together were going to be rare and precious.

  “Goodnight,” Tiana called as she headed for the house.

  “Night,” Buck answered and got up, wiping his hands on his pants. “Are you kids all set?”

  “We are.” Alicia switched on her flashlight and it illuminated her face. “Ready to scare!”

  Marie giggled. “That face has been scaring me all my life.”

  Alicia rolled her eyes. “That is sooo original.”

  “I bet I have a ghost story that’s original,” Marie retorted.

  “Then let’s hear it,” Rhett said as he positioned his pillow so he could rest his head on it just inside the tent flap.

  “It’s a vampire story,” Marie began.

  “Vampire’s aren’t ghosts,” Alicia informed her.

  “But they are undead,” Marie retorted. “What’s wrong, afraid I might scare you?”

  Buck chuckled. “I’ll leave you to your stories. Goodnight.”

  “Night,” t
he three kids chorused back.

  Still smiling to himself, Buck walked across the grass to the tent where his mate was waiting. He needed to stop thinking of Rhett as a kid. He wasn’t, he was a young man on the cusp of his adult life and Buck wanted to be supportive and help him through this difficult time where all the choices were laid before him and none of his paths were clear.

  “Has war broken out yet?” Haley asked as he reached the tent. The door was open, and the interior was dimly lit by a solar lantern.

  “Not yet. Marie wants to tell a vampire story, but Alicia pointed out they weren’t ghosts.” He hunkered down in the doorway.

  Haley was inside her sleeping bag, lying face down with her head resting on her hands, which were propped up on the pillow. “They always find something to disagree on. But they always work it out in the end.”

  “You’ve taught them diplomacy, I’m impressed.” He rocked on his heels, unsure of invading her privacy. Buck was acutely aware that they had only just met and that she might have changed her mind about them sharing a tent for the night.

  “Come in,” she said. “Let’s shut the world outside for a while.” She patted the sleeping bag which she had set out beside her.

  He took a deep breath and slid inside the tent where he turned around and sat on the sleeping bag, so he could pull off his shoes. Placing them by the door, just in case he had to get up in the night to deal with any ghost-related emergencies, he then swiveled around and crawled into the small tent. “Snug.”

  Haley laughed. “Isn’t it?”

  Was she undressed beneath her bedding? Was she expecting him to strip down? Or would she be horrified?

  This was ridiculous, at his age he should have all his shit together, and yet he was as nervous as a kid on the first day of school. Perhaps because school had been so difficult for him.

  “Hey.” She touched his hand and he jumped. “Just relax. This is going to work easier for all of us if we have no expectations of perfection. We take it slow and don’t be afraid to laugh at ourselves.”

  “It’s you laughing at me I’m worried about,” he admitted, and unbuckled his belt and slid out of his jeans. “While you are perfect already.”