He glanced at the clock on the wall. Maggie would be finishing work. What plans did they have for the evening that didn’t include him? It felt like a fist was crushing his heart. He couldn’t keep going this way. He was kidding himself.
Chad punched him on the arm. “Wake up.”
Michael winced at the pain. “Get on with you. What did you do that for, you maggot?”
“Meg Riley’s on the phone for you.”
“Why?”
Chad shrugged. “No idea, but if you answer you might find out.”
Michael vaulted the bar and grabbed the handset. “Darlin’, what’s up?”
“Nothing. My car won’t start. The mechanic is coming to the office to look at it in the morning. Sam’s in a class. Could you come and collect me from work?”
“Absolutely. Just a minute.” He put his hand over the mouthpiece. “Chad, can you manage without me for a while?”
Chad shook his head. “Man. We don’t open for another two hours. Go do whatever you have to.”
Michael needed no second invitation. After promising Maggie he would be right over, he grabbed his coat and keys and headed off. At last she needed him for something. Maybe she was starting to get used to the idea of going public. The traffic was heavy but he cut down back streets and muscled his Porsche through the rush hour traffic to pull up fifteen minutes later in the parking lot at Maggie’s new employer. He climbed from the car and locked it before heading inside.
The girl behind the reception desk smiled, her gaze sweeping his body and then settling on his face with more than a hint of approval.
“I’m here to meet Maggie Riley.”
“Maggie? Do you mean Meg? Are you sure someone else can’t help you?” She leaned forward, revealing a buxom pair of barely contained boobs. Her shirt buttons were almost popping off.
“Meg suits me fine.”
“Fair enough.” She lifted the phone and spoke to someone as she twirled a long blonde curl around her finger. A side door opened and Maggie appeared. He stepped toward her, intent on tugging her into an embrace, but when she froze he pulled himself to a stop. A tall dark-haired woman followed her into the reception area. She glanced at Michael.
“Are you being taken care of?”
Maggie smiled. “He’s here for me.”
“New client? Or sexy new boyfriend. Don’t tell me you dumped that yummy beefcake you live with.”
“Sam? No nothing like that.” Maggie’s face flushed with embarrassment. “He’s just a friend coming to my rescue. Rosalind, this is Michael.”
Her words cut deep. Maggie had only been working at the agency for a few weeks but already Sam was known to be her boyfriend and Michael was no one. Before they had all started sleeping together, she hadn’t shied away from his inappropriate kisses and hugs but now she wouldn’t even touch him in public. Just for once he would love her to tell the truth about him, but her office wasn’t the time to fight his corner.
Maggie’s companion held out her hand and Michael took it. “Lovely to meet you, Rosalind.”
The older woman smiled. “Oh, Irish. How lovely. Tell me, Michael, have you ever thought about modeling?” She pulled her hand free and looked at Maggie. “He’d be perfect for the Benson account with Ellen.”
“I’m not sure he’d be interested. He’s not into that sort of thing.”
“All men are into that sort of thing, cozying up with a scantily clad female for money.”
“Not Michael. He doesn’t like girls. He’s gay.”
Michael sighed. On the one hand he was delighted she was jealous of the idea of another woman getting close to him, but on the other he was dismayed that she had to lie to protect what she clearly considered hers. He was stuck in no man’s land. “Am not. I just like to squeeze your man’s butt.”
“So, you’re single, then?”
He shrugged. “Not exactly.” He glanced at Maggie who was staring intently at the pattern on the carpet. “It’s complicated.”
Rosalind tugged a card from her pocket and slipped it into the front pocket of his leather pants. “Maybe you should uncomplicate things. If you want to talk about becoming the next Benson man, or want a new butt to squeeze, give me a call.”
Maggie grabbed Michael’s arm and dragged him toward the door. “Night, then.”
Rosalind leaned on the front counter. “Night, Meg, and I’ll be waiting to hear from you, Michael.”
The walk to the car was tense and silent, and the drive home no better. Pulling up outside her flat, he turned to look at her. “I’m not sure why you’re angry at me.”
“You were flirting with my boss.”
“I was doing no such thing. She was flirting with me.”
“Same thing.”
“Not at all. I have no desire to chase other women even though they might want to chase me. I love you, Maggie, no matter what happens.”
She looked at him. “What do you mean?”
He sighed. Now wasn’t the time for a full and frank discussion while they were both grumpy with each other. “I have to get back to work.”
A big fat tear slid down her face, and his heart melted. “Don’t, darlin’. Please don’t cry.”
“You hate me, don’t you?”
Without a word he climbed from the car and went around to help her out. Once she was on her feet he slammed the door and hit the button to lock the Porsche before lifting her into his arms. He used his key to open the front door and kicked it shut behind them, and then he sat on the sofa. He held her tight as she continued to cry. He should have left things alone. He’d known what he was walking into and how the relationship would work out. If it wasn’t enough, he should never have started. Now he had, maybe he should be man enough to do what needed to be done.
As her crying became more a sniffle than a sob, he cupped her face and kissed the end of her nose. “Why the tears?”
“I’m going to lose you, aren’t I?”
He could only sit alone and wait for so long. The life he had imagined with Shannon and Tabitha had slipped through his fingers, and now he had a half life with Maggie and Sam. When would he get his happy ending? “When I left Ireland, I went back to London to see a girl I used to live with.”
“Why?”
Michael stroked her hair and tugged her to lie with her head on his chest. “She has a little girl, a wee angel called Tabitha. Shannon told me the child was mine and I so wanted her to be. I wanted to find a life where I belonged, with someone of my very own to love.”
“But?”
“Shannon lied. The child wasn’t mine, and no matter how much I wanted her to be I couldn’t pretend. One day someone would know the truth and tell Tabitha and her little heart would be broken.”
Maggie burrowed tight against him, her hands fisted in his shirt. “And now you have to pretend that you still have no one.”
“I don’t want to lose what the three of us have, but I’m not sure I can keep living a lie. I love you and Sam.”
“It’s not enough.”
“No, darlin’. I don’t think it is. I want to be part of your life. I want to see you every day. Kiss you, make love to you, wake up in your bed and not be a dirty secret you bring out on the weekends. I’m not sure you’ll ever be ready for that. Besides, it’s only a matter of time before someone finds us out, and I don’t want to be the one that brings your life crashing down around you. I don’t want what we have to be tainted by your concern about what other people think. I really don’t think this is what you want.”
Maggie sat back and stared into his eyes. “Is this goodbye?”
Michael shrugged. When he’d left the club he’d never intended to have this conversation, but now she’d asked the question he’d been mulling over for days, he knew the answer. “I guess it is. I can’t make you comfortable with a life that doesn’t fit. You need Sam but you’ll get over me.”
A fresh tear spilled down her cheek, and Michael’s gut twisted. He hated to be the one to break thin
gs off but for once in his life he was doing the right thing.
He hugged her tight and dropped a kiss on the top of her head. “I really have to go. Sam will be home soon.”
“Will you come back?”
Michael shrugged. “I don’t know, darlin’. I don’t know.”
Chapter 60
Sam pulled his motorbike to a stop beside the Porsche with the license plate HARD ON, switched off the engine and kicked the stand down. He’d tried Michael’s apartment first, but he should have guessed he’d be hanging around the strip club even though he didn’t start work for hours. Maybe he was drowning his misery in work, or perhaps he thought Sam wouldn’t make a scene in public if he tracked him down. He had to know confrontation was inevitable. Sam tugged off his helmet and stowed it under the bike. He made short work of crossing to the door and was relieved to find it unlocked. Once inside, he took a moment to let his eyes adjust to the dim interior. Chad was busy stocking the bar and Michael was nowhere in sight.
Sam strolled across the room, and Chad stopped work with a crate of beer in hand.
“Michael around?”
Chad dumped the crate on the bar. “Why?”
“I need to speak to him.”
“About?”
“None of your business.”
“I have no idea what’s going on but I do know that ever since he rushed out of here to visit Meg yesterday he’s been as miserable as sin. Whatever went down, I think he’s been punished enough. No point in you coming in here to whip his arse for going after your girl.”
Sam grinned. He liked Chad’s attitude and devotion to Michael, but he wasn’t about to leave. “I don’t have an issue with him and Meg. I have an issue with him and me.”
Chad scratched his head. “What does that mean?”
Sam was sick of playing games. Meg might want to keep things a secret, but he had no such issues. “If the bastard plans to dump me, I prefer he does it to my face.”
“Dump you?”
“Can you just tell him I’m here?”
The door that led to the office opened and Michael leaned against the frame. “Sam, what can I do for you?”
Sam glanced at Chad and then back at Michael. If the big guy didn’t know what was going on, perhaps Michael preferred to keep secrets. “Maybe we should take this in the office.”
“Maybe we shouldn’t. I’ve nothing to hide from Chad.”
Chad shook his head. “Other than the fact you were dating Sam. I had no idea you swung that way.”
Michael grinned. “Are you worried I might hit on you or disappointed I’ve never tried?” Chad shrugged. Michael stepped into the room and placed a hand on Chad’s shoulder. “Don’t worry. You don’t need to answer. I wasn’t dating Sam. It’s complicated.”
Sam snorted. “So complicated you walked out and left Meg a blubbering mess. I really believed you when you said you loved her, but it was all just a snow job so you could get in her pants. I should never have trusted you.”
“I do love her. Walking away is killing me.”
“So why did you do it, then? Is it me? Is sharing her such a hardship? I thought we’d connected? I’d even started to like you.”
“I’m deeply touched.”
Michael slid onto the bar stool next to where Sam was standing. He looked up at the now taller man, and Sam was shocked to see tears welling in the Irishman’s eyes. “I love her so much I think it might break me. I walked away for her own good. She’ll never be able to live out in the open with both of us. One day someone would find out our secret and it would crush her. Better I walk away and leave her to you. You’re good for her. You know what she needs.”
“I do know what she needs and right now what she needs is you, you stupid Irish git.”
Michael shook his head. “You’re wrong. She told me once she wanted a normal life. This isn’t normal.”
“Meg has no idea what she wants, but whatever it is, it’s never going to be normal. If you love her you have to fight.”
“You were the one who told me not to push her.”
Sam rolled his eyes and let out a loud sigh. He knew he would never be allowed to live down what he was about to say. “I was wrong. She won’t budge without persuasion. If you want her you have to make her see that there is nothing wrong with how she wants to live, and be prepared to protect her from people like her mother.”
Michael pushed to his feet, and Sam took a step back, but not fast enough to avoid the crushing punch to his jaw. He stumbled and grabbed the bar for support. Blood smeared his knuckles when he wiped his hand across his mouth. His face throbbed and he wasn’t entirely sure he hadn’t lost a tooth. “What the fuck was that for?”
“For making me break up with the both of you and to pay you out for putting me on my back in Ireland.”
Sam grinned at the memory. Michael chuckled and tugged Sam into a hug. Sam returned the embrace but wriggled free when Michael planted a kiss on his cheek. He wiped his face. “What’s wrong with you? Have you never heard of shaking hands?”
“I don’t think it’s your hand I should be shaking.”
Sam pushed at Michael’s chest to hold him off. “Stop. We’re here to talk about getting Meg to open up and admit she loves us both, not to help you live out your kinky fantasies.”
“You’re breaking my heart. I thought you were here because you loved me.”
Chad cleared his throat. “You’re freaking me out now. I get that you two have something going on with Meg, and all power to you, but I don’t need to know the details.” He patted Michael on the shoulder. “If you love Meg then I agree you should fight for her. Now I need to get back to work.”
Michael looked at Sam and they both grinned. “How about we get a drink and take this to the office. We have planning to do.”
Sam nodded. “Sure and I have an idea. You know it’s Maud’s hen’s night on Friday?”
“Aye, what of it? “ Michael lifted two beers from the fridge, popped the tops off and handed one over.
Sam took a long suck on the bottle. “It’s the perfect opportunity to spring a trap, but we’ve only got three days to get it right and Meg can’t suspect a thing.”
Meg stuck her tongue out and examined it in the bathroom mirror. She was sick, she was sure of it. Tongues weren’t supposed to look that way, and was that a rash on her boobs? She tugged her robe open to take a closer look.
Sam wandered into the bathroom. “What are you doing?”
She turned to face him. “Look, I’ve got a rash and my tongue’s all furry. I think I should stay home in bed.”
“I think you need to put on that dress I bought you and let me finish helping you with your makeup and hair.”
The man was every woman’s dream boyfriend. After a stint working backstage in the theatre in his youth, he was dab hand at giving a girl a dream makeover. Meg frowned as she tried to come up with another symptom. There was a dull pain in the back of her head, which was a sure sign she was going to have a stroke any minute.
Sam grabbed her hand and tugged her toward the bedroom. He’d been insistent she go to Maud’s bachelorette party and it seemed nothing would dissuade him. He’d even wangled himself an invite. Not that Maud was ever going to say no to him wanting anything. She loved to pinch his butt, which was just one of the many reasons Meg was suspicious as hell about Sam’s motives. They would be far better off staying home so he could avoid Maud and she could avoid Michael. Not that she cared about him in the slightest. He’d walked away and it was his funeral. She’d shed enough tears over that moronic Irish shit. Maybe Sam was right. Maybe she should go and show him that she couldn’t care less about him.
She tugged her robe shut. “Fine, let’s get ready, then.”
Under Sam’s instruction, she pulled on underwear that seemed far too sexy for an all girls night out, and the little black dress was very little. Her mother would pitch a fit about Meg’s wayward boobs in the strappy little number. The sandals were cute, though. She
sat patiently as Sam mastered her curls and wove them into a hairdo she would never have had the patience to try herself. Her eye makeup was smoky, her lips a sexy cherry red and her jewelry stylish and understated. Finally ready, she did a twirl in front of the mirror and secretly wondered if Sam was planning to make Michael wish he had never walked away. Too late now, his decision had been made and she refused to cry and mess up her face.
Sam handed her a black clutch bag and she tucked it under her arm before taking the hand he offered. They left the house and Sam locked up. Her car was back where it belonged and she climbed into the passenger’s seat, more than happy for Sam to drive.
He flicked the engine to life and they headed out. She gazed out the window, more and more certain she wanted to go home. She couldn’t see Michael yet, she wasn’t ready. When they did meet, she wanted to be strong, resilient, and not turn to a sobbing mess. He could never know how much he had hurt her. Sam patted her thigh, and she forced a smile. From the way Sam patted her again, she knew he wasn’t buying it.
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