Angel Promises Fulfilled

by Angel Promises Fulfilled (v5. 0) (epub)

  Once again, Jenny stopped and turned to Henry, “What do you think, Henry?”

  “I think it’s a wonderful thing to do, Jenny. You have so much to offer and give. You’re sensitive, accepting and empathetic; you would be perfect for that job! Not only do you have the skills, you would also be such a positive role model. Yes, by all means, Jenny, if you want my opinion, absolutely, go for it. I would be the first to want to join if males were permitted!” Henry added with a wink.

  “Before I can be a role model, I will have to fix my relationship with my son, I am at a loss as to how to reach him.”

  Henry was aware of some of the problems Jenny had with J.J. from reading her diary. But for the next half hour, Jenny shared more of her relationship with James and a similar scenario was occurring with Nora that had happened to her.

  “I would hate to see Nora go through what I did and not receive any compensation from the marriage or financial support to look after Jimmy if it should come to that.”

  “Well, from what you told me about your marriage to James, the sooner we deal with Nora’s situation the better. At least she hasn’t invested as many years into the marriage as you have. They’ve been married four years, is that correct?”

  “Yes, but with J.J.’s present attitude, it could seem like ten years to Nora. She was very upset when I spoke with her the other night; I hope she can cope with it. I’ve already told Father about it and asked him to say Mass for them and perhaps get his warriors at the care home to pray as well. If the results are anything like what has happened to us, they don’t stand a chance.”

  “Prayer will help but from the sounds of it all she most likely will need your guidance and support. Not everyone can handle a failing marriage like you did. By your very nature, you are accepting and can tolerate others’ shortcomings and not be adversely affected by them. But this is not the usual case, for one that is not centered and confident within themselves, such a relationship can have disastrous effects.”

  Jenny smiled at Henry and softly said, “It’s so nice to be understood and affirmed.”

  Henry reached across the table and took Jenny’s hands into his. He looked lovingly into her eyes and posed the question. “What’s happening to us Jenny? Where is our future heading? I would love for us to consider marriage…there are a few obstacles—”

  “I think I am aware of the main one,” Jenny interjected. “I have to get an annulment from James.”

  Henry was surprised by what Jenny just said as he was going to bring up that very topic. “Were you talking with Father about that?”

  “No, I spoke with the parish priest at the church I go to in this area. He told me that the Church does not recognize divorce and that the only way I could remarry was if James died or we can show in some way that the marriage wasn’t valid in the first place.”

  “I recall you telling me how unsure you were of marrying James and that you fainted as you struggled to say the marriage vows. Father thought that might have some bearing in the sense that you were pressured into the marriage or didn’t fully realize what you were doing.”

  “But I did Henry; I knew what I was getting into, although I did feel pressured by my Mom and James…”

  “The other thing Father asked me was if you had received dispensation from the Church if you could marry outside the Church. Did you?”

  “We were supposed to be married in a cathedral and had a huge wedding planned, but James’ father died and James was involved in a major deal or merger and pleaded with me to just elope. Suddenly, everything was in such a rush. He promised that on our first anniversary we could receive the blessings of the Church and have friends and family present, but that never happened. To answer your question, yes, I did get dispensation from the Bishop due to the circumstances and that the Justice of the Peace was a retired Pastor from James’ mother’s church. Mom was so anxious for us to get married that she agreed and thought too, that a special church ceremony down the line would be okay…”

  “We just need James to agree now to an annulment…” Henry offered with a tone of hope.

  “I don’t think James will agree to it. We spoke a couple of times since my life and health was restored and he is adamant that I come back to the estate. He seems so different from when we lived together. When I spoke with Matti the other day, she too, cannot believe how different James is. By the sounds of it, he and the staff have become the best of friends.”

  Henry wondered if he should tell Jenny that James called him as well. It was unsettling to say the least with the threats James threw at him. Jenny would be very upset to learn her ex-husband had the nerve to do that…and yet, Henry couldn’t blame him for trying to get his former wife back. He thought it best to just leave it for now. Instead he asked, “How do you feel about James wanting you to come back, Jenny? Do you want to go back to him?” Henry moved closer to the edge of his seat and held his breath.

  “I told him over and over that I could no longer do that and I had moved on with my life.”

  “How did he feel about that?” Henry already had a good idea but still was anxious to hear it from Jenny.

  “He wouldn’t accept it and kept going on how he has changed and that he is ill and needs me. The one thing that did affect me more than anything he said was that J.J. needs me and that if I come back, I would be instrumental in restoring J.J. and Nora’s marriage…and I do miss my grandson.”

  “Oh, Jenny, what a position you are in…what do you want to do?”

  “I would love to fly to Ottawa a week or so after we see Peter. Nora needs some support and probably some advice on how their financial affairs are set up if it’s not too late. I do want to spend some time with my grandson and hopefully be able to talk to J.J. and for us to make up. Oh that will be so difficult trying to resolve things with that boy of mine…do you think you might be able to come with me?”

  “Yes, of course I will come with you.” Henry said, showing immediate support.

  “That makes me feel better and perhaps when I see James in person, I’ll ask if he would agree to an annulment. If he does, then we at least stand a chance the Church might grant it. Without his consent and the fact that he wants to try again, will definitely impede the process.”

  Henry’s mind barely heard Jenny’s concern with her son and family…what if James refused to go along with the annulment?

  “I don’t like to see this as an option, Jenny, but the only way we might be able to get married is if James should die.”

  “Well, he is ill and that could be a possibility, but knowing James he might consider life support to keep him alive until a cure is found. In fact, Matti told me a while back that James is having his body frozen upon his death for the same reason.”

  “I’ve read about that. Apparently scientists are still working on how to bring the person back. That is, how to thaw the person quickly enough and not destroy the cells along the way…something like that.”

  Henry paused for a moment to reflect and then cautiously continued, “So even if his illness would bring him to his death, he could be kept alive for years. How would the church view a situation like that…would he be considered dead or not?”

  “Just talking about it gives me the shivers, Henry. I hope things don’t come down to any of that. I do want the best for James.”

  Henry nodded, “So do I, Jenny, so do I.”

  Chapter Fifty Six

  They were all so nervous as they boarded Air Canada for Calgary. The sky was overcast, reflecting their somber mood. Jenny sat in the middle seat of row seven. Her elbows rested on the armrest, but her hands were tightly wrapped around Camilla’s who sat in the window seat and Henry’s, who was next to the aisle. They were finally on their way to meet the man who had assaulted Jenny over thirty two years ago and fathered a child that fateful night. Henry had called Peter over a week ago and made arrangements for the meeting as soon as they landed in the Calgary airport.

  Henry recalled the conversation he had wi
th Peter. He was so thankful for the call and that the ladies had decided to come and meet with him. Henry already knew that his wife, Angelika, knew of the matter and that his parishioners did as well. What Henry did not know, however, was whether or not Peter’s children were also aware of their father’s daughter and that they had a half sister. Peter said that his wife and children would be with him at the airport.

  During their conversation, Peter also told Henry that the reason he was so haunted by what he did was due to the aches and pains he had in his stomach just like Henry did prior to Jenny giving birth to Camilla. Amazingly, on May 24, 1957, Peter, like Henry, also threw up on the day of Camilla’s birth and on each and every year that followed up until last year. Early on, Peter realized that there was something to this as the thought of his assault on Jenny was so strongly associated with the pain and nausea that he felt. Further, when he made the calculations in his mind, the day he first threw up was in that ninth month period after he and his friends had taken Jenny to the park.

  Over the years he was continuously haunted by the fact that he had fathered a child that evening. Finally, after all those years, the day of reckoning, reconciliation and hopefully healing was upon them all. It was now Henry, who squeezed Jenny’s hand as a chilling tingle ran up and down his spine.

  Jenny, too, was immersed in thoughts about that fateful night. One flashback after another crossed her mind; the boys coming out of their car and grabbing her and forcing her into the back seat. She could feel the fear seeping through her now as the car sped away. She tried to look back at Henry but the boy’s grip on her wrists was too strong. She remembered pleading with them to take her back and let her go, but all she heard was laughing and obscenities. The fear that rushed through her when they parked the car and pulled her out, terrified her.

  Jenny began to shake in the seat. She wanted to grab the angel hanging on the chain around her neck, but didn’t want to let go of either Henry’s or Camilla’s hand. Oh guardian angel please help me, Jenny screamed in her mind now, as she did back then.

  Jenny squeezed her daughter’s hand and felt Camilla’s love transmitted back with a tender hold. Next to her sat a beautiful child, a daughter that she loved deeply; the result of that fateful night. How could she mar that image of her child due to the manner in which she was conceived? She must do as Father Engelmann said; separate the act from the person whom God created. At the core of the assailant’s being is the love of God. Father Engelmann was right. She could not give in to her feelings, she must be like Jesus and forgive. Forgiveness was the only answer that would heal and give freedom.

  Jenny felt the power of forgiveness growing within her…

  As the plane hurtled through the sky, each second bringing them closer to their meeting, Jenny’s nervousness returned. She agitated in her chair, her feet started to bounce. It was the same when she was waiting in the doctor’s office for the test results. Every sound was like an explosion; the doctor’s footsteps coming down the hall, the turning of the door knob, the click shut. She recalled every move the doctor made; entering his office and avoiding eye contact, the swirling of his chair and pushing it next to her, his furtive glances, movements, his facial expressions, it all revealed what words would come out of his mouth. He sat down in front of her. Instantly, the flashbacks of that awful night and the naked truth of what had really happened was written in the doctor’s eyes.

  Oh angel of God help me, please don’t let me faint again.

  “Mom, are you okay?” Camilla asked, concern written all over her pretty face.

  Jenny nodded and forced a smile. She squeezed her daughter’s hand.

  God had worked miraculously in her life by healing her and bringing her back. She believed it was for her and Henry to be together, but she could see that this might be another major reason for her return. She had to love. She could forgive now, this minute, she was certain of it, but when she faced him, could she still?

  Please come into my heart, dear Jesus. Give me Your heart, Your strength, Your mercy, Your compassion, Your spirit of forgiveness. Give me the grace and strength to do what I must…

  Camilla turned to her mother, and noticed Jenny’s eyes were closed. She wondered about all the thoughts that must be running through her mind. Girls who have been assaulted are so emotionally distraught; the trauma of that event plaguing them for days, months and years. She could only imagine what her mother went through at age fifteen and how she coped with it all of those years.

  Camilla was surprised how well her mother did cope with it. Perhaps it was Jenny’s closeness to her guardian angel which provided so much comfort from her protector. But then again, it was also Henry’s love and imagining that it was he who was the father. Perhaps it was all these factors as well as her nature that gave Jenny the ability to accept what happened without too much trauma. How would she react when she saw Peter, Camilla wondered?

  It was at Father Engelmann’s anniversary party that she had first seen Peter. Immediately, she knew there was some connection. She could see it in his stare; his features, the way he talked. Although she had always felt that she was dearly loved by her adoptive parents, she felt a sense of belonging that she had not felt before… even though he was a complete stranger.

  Camilla had those feelings now, but with understanding. She now knew why she was so drawn to him.

  Peter was her father.

  A mixture of excitement, nervousness and fear sizzled through her body. How would the meeting go? She knew she could accept her father and what he did. She should be angry with him and what he did to her mother, but she wasn’t. Perhaps it had to do with the way Jenny had accepted it and her birth and the deep, genuine love she felt from her. Her mother had not allowed the event to destroy her or control her life.

  Maybe that was it.

  She had seen and heard of so many cases of sexual assault and the devastating effects it had on so many people. Camilla wanted this to be different. She could see the pain that girls went through and how they relive the trauma over and over, unwilling to let go through forgiveness. Many girls did not realize the power they had given to their assailant by allowing themselves to be controlled by another’s actions and shortcomings, sometimes for years. Camilla did not want to imprison herself like that nor her mother and father. She wanted healing more than anything and she wanted it now. She hoped and prayed her mother did, too.

  Tomorrow, it may very well be too late!

  Suddenly the voice of Captain spoke through the intercom, “Please fasten your seat belts. We are entering into turbulent skies as we begin our descent for landing and may experience some bumpy spots.”

  No sooner had the man in control of the plane uttered those words then the aircraft began to rattle and shake as it hurtled through the sky. “Flight attendants please take your seats and fasten your seat belts. We will be landing in Calgary in ten minutes.”

  Jenny couldn’t help but feel the road ahead would be turbulent as well, but prayed that soon there would be smooth sailing and clear skies. The minutes and seconds were speeding up, bringing them closer to their impending meeting. Please, dear Jesus, help me to trust completely in You. Oh, Hannah, protect us and bring us safely to the ground. She squeezed Henry’s hand.

  Henry knew it wasn’t the bumpy ride through the sky that was giving his loved one jittery nerves, but what lay just ahead. Similar thoughts were growing in his mind as well.

  Their hearts raced as they felt the tires come out of the plane’s belly and lock into place for the landing.

  “Oh, Mom, I feel so nervous, I wonder how Peter and his family must be feeling.”

  “I can just imagine, Camilla. This is going to be hard on all of us, but it will be worth it, honey…”

  Jenny’s words trailed off as the plane hit the tarmac. Their bodies were thrust forward as the brakes and wing flaps were applied reversing the thrust.

  As soon as the sliding glass doors opened into the main terminal, Jenny knew instantly that
the man in the distance next to a woman and three other adults was Peter with his family. He didn’t look at all like the huge muscular man that had assaulted her, but thin and frail. But then, like her, he was plagued with cancer and the disease had taken its toll on his body.

  His arms hung at his side and when he saw Jenny, he slightly raised his right hand and waved. It was a hesitant movement, an unsure one, not knowing if the person it was intended for would reciprocate.

  Before Jenny could respond, Camilla had already raised her hand and waved back. While Jenny wanted to slow their approach to the nervous waiting family, Camilla tightened her grip on her mother’s hand and quickened her pace, pulling Jenny forward and Henry along with her. When they were a few feet from each other, they came to a halt, as if to rethink what was about to happen or should happen.

  For years and years, Jenny had this image of a strong man forcing her to the ground, his eyes filled with a raving, frenzied look, and now, there before her was a man whose eyes were filled with sorrow and remorse. She could read the pleading in his face and the way he stood there asking for her forgiveness.

  He appeared broken.

  He waited and the momentary hesitancy on her part must have been like a year to him. His wife’s hand wrapped around his was white. In a flashing glance, Jenny saw the woman’s pain and pleading, too, and all she had gone through to accept what her husband had done. Her support of her husband, stung Jenny’s heart.

  Jenny had gone over and over how her reaction would affect all those present, but now she was in the moment; this moment. If she was cold, they would think evil of their father. Jenny wanted to send the message that he was a good man who had made a mistake. It was not only for them, but for her daughter as well.