by T J Reeder
I left the babies rolling around with each other, took Beth into our bedroom, closed the door and spent twenty minutes swearing I wouldn’t leave again for anything for at least 6 months.
I was home, we were home, laughter from the living room as they tell Kid about the poor kid peeing his pants, and I still felt sorry for the kid. He would be better off living here. We could help him be all he could be.
One week later…
“John”
“JOHN!”
What now?
“John”
WHAT?
“Don’t shout so much, it’s bad for your blood pressure”
What?
“John, we’re bored”
BETH!
“Pussy”
“Wimp. Marines suck.”
BETH!
No Rest For the Wicked
Book 13
They say there is no rest for the wicked; if that’s true I must be the wickedest dude on the planet.
“John.”
“JOHN!”
What now?
“John, open your eyes, love.”
Huh? Oh! Beth!
“Yes honey, it’s me, not ‘Them.”
Why? What’s wrong?
“Well, I took a call on the five watt from Kid; she says there’s a problem at the motor pool.”
It took me less then a second to realize ‘they’ were the problem and the gutless grease balls in the motor pool were afraid to tackle them. I thought about just leaving them to run wild figuring they would run down soon.
The five-watt clicked again and Kid was really in a panic. “John! Get down here!” She never calls me ‘John’ unless the enemy is thru the wire and in the trenches (so to speak). I slowly got up with a groan. I fell asleep on the floor with the kids playing king of the mountain. They played, I slept- win-win.
Beth said, “Come on. I’ll go too” and handing me JC, she grabbed Sam and out the door we went.
As we got close to the grease pit I could hear laughter coming from a lot of people. Either they were roasting the pit boss or they were about to blow something up.
Kid got there at the same time. I asked who was watching the communications and she said nobody- but this wasn’t something she was gonna miss. I swear she’s a clone of Sandy.
They had Henry (the head wrench) backed into a hummer and were both attacking him at the same time. He had his arms crossed over his chest; short stinky cigar jutting out of his clinched teeth.
I walked up and said, “OK, knock it off and leave Henry be.” They turned on me and when Henry tried to slip away both put a hand on his chest and leaned on him.
Sandy said, “Who invited you?” She looked around in time to see one of the gear heads ducking out of sight. She yelled out, “I see you, Smokey, you rat; and we will see you again!” The crowd was eating this up; Henry wasn’t really in danger… or not much. I figured if he was they would already have him skinned and roasting over a slow fire, reminding me I’m so glad we settled in Navajo and not Apache country. That would really scare the shit out of me.
I finally asked Henry what the problem was. He said they had stolen a mini gun off a Utah blackhawk and they wanted him to help the gun nuts mount it on their jeep. I looked at them and said, “You stole a mini-gun?” May said, “We did not! Henry’s a liar!” Sandy said, “We traded for it!”
Now I have to admit I thought we had some mini-guns someplace but could be wrong. I asked what they traded for it. Now they got their shifty eye look on and I knew somehow I got screwed in the deal.
Henry, now feeling safe said, “They traded five cases of good scotch for it. Both slugged him in the gut. He laughed and said, “My momma hits harder.” I got both by the shirtfront and pulled them away from him, all to the ‘boo’s’ of their fans.
I said, “You two traded my scotch for a damn gun?” Sandy said, “Nope, we traded that and five cases of Jim beam for a Mini-gun.” Again their many fans laughed. I was stumped and asked why in the world they would do that.
May said, “Coz we don’t have one?” Sandy said, “Yeah, and it’s not like you need to drink so much.” More laughing and clapping. They were bowing.
I shook my head and asked Henry what his objections were. He said he actually didn’t care one way or the other, but getting them all worked up was a lot of fun on a boring day.
I simply walked away to the jeers and hisses of the audience who wanted blood- my blood. I stuck my hand up with extended finger and was rewarded with cheers.
They told Henry to get to work and chased after Beth and me and ‘MY’ babies (“John you’re gonna get hurt if you keep that ‘M’Y crap up! They are ours!”) Beth said, “You’re as childish as they are!” I smiled and said, “Thank you!” We were passing the outdoor cooking area and JC started squirming. I knew he smelled something good so I headed that way and yes, there were brownies in the ovens. I love the cooks!
I found a stump and set JC down and away he went, right to one of the ladies who seem to live to cook good stuff in these clay ovens. They love the kids and spoil them rotten (“Yeah, and like you’re not?”) Shut up. (“Bite me…please? Hahaahha”) Both were laughing.
JC scored a brownie, pissing his sister off, so Beth set her down and she headed right for JC and his brownie. The girls were rooting her on while JC was trying to get away. Sam pounced and the war was on. I have given up interfering in these cookie wars. JC holds his own, so it’s a draw.
It did get interesting when he dropped the brownie to fight and Walker lunged for it, meeting Molly who got it first and it was gone. The crowd was laughing and cheering Molly and booing when the girls separated the kids and got each their own brownie.
We live a strange life; people just do their thing, when they want. Kids learn what they want, which seems to drive them to learn more than being forced to go to a school would. Some will spend the morning learning math and the afternoon loading ammo or shooting it up. There is always somebody doing something that a kid or kids will just join in and learn while doing. I sure could have used this system as a kid.
It’s been three months since we fought the Chinese troops to a finish. The wounded were all home and life was returning to normal,(if there is a normal to our life). I’m surprised the girls have been so quiet so long and in hindsight I’m now worried.
Why do they want a mini-gun on their jeep? What do they have going on in their sweet little heads? Now, I’m really worried. Beth leaned over and said, “It’s OK, baby. I’m on it.” OK, I’m cool. Beth is the only person I know who has any controlling abilities with them. I gave up long ago.
Come morning I headed down to the cooking area to have a cup with the troops. Jackson, (the head gun nut) was there and asked if I was really letting ‘them’ put a mini-gun on their Jeep? I told him that his first mistake was using the word ‘letting’ and the second was asking me about it since I have nothing to do with it; but now that he brought it up, what about it?
He asked if I remembered the rate of fire for one of these things. I had to think a minute and said, “Well, they have two cycles. I think. And I think high speed is around 5,000 rounds a minute?” He said, “Close enough for an old grunt.” Then said, “Do we have enough ammo for them to have one to play with?”
They came wandering up right then so I asked them where they were getting ammo. Sandy said, “Oh, we have plenty.” May said, “Yeah, we do.” “And where” said I, “Did you get it?” “We traded for it with the Utah chopper dudes.”
“And what did you trade?” They said they had traded five cases of Jack Daniels and 200 pounds of coffee beans for two pallets of ammo. I was stunned into silence. That was a good trade! I asked who in the world would trade all that for some booze and coffee beans. They laughed and May said, “Well John- them Mormon boys like booze and coffee when nobody’s looking and we had it and they didn’t.”
I have to admit they did well. I had a feeling I’d be hearing from the General of the Utah Guard sooner
or later, but it was done and he could come get his gun and ammo back (and good luck with that!) I wasn’t going to get in the middle.
Jackson said he was impressed. Even for them this was a good deal. He said would mount the gun- they had a 60 on that jeep, so I guess changing it over wasn’t a big deal. This one runs off the vehicle’s electrical power so I could see where he might have a job on his hands. I told him they had already made a deal with Henry to help with the power set up. They were happy, and when they’re happy they ain’t hurting people. So I was happy.
That night after dinner we sat in the living room with a small fire in the fireplace. The kids were on the bearskin rug which they saw as a big daddy beard. I was laying beside them and the girls were laying around us. It was a real good time. We were talking softly while Molly slept and Walker paced and worried. Kid was reading a book on the rise and fall of the Roman Empire. Why, I didn’t know until she said anybody who read it would see America had been heading down the same road and in her opinion wouldn’t have lasted another 20 years before full collapse.
Sandy said, “See May, you jumped the gun- shoulda waited.” May laughed and said, “And where would we be sitting right now if I had?” She had a good point. Even Sandy admitted it. It’s funny how things go sometimes.
Beth sat up and said, “Lets go to Texas! We haven’t seen John’s mom or Miz Sheri since the babies came and John’s mom has never seen them.” The girls jumped on that and the three of them were off and running with it. Kid just snuggled closer to me and yawned. We laid there listening to them plan it all out. Kid looked at me and said, “Texas?” I said, “Yep.” She said, “A place full of Bears like our Bear?” I laughed and said, “No, he’s the runt of the litter at his home place.” She said she had to see that.
The next day we announced we were heading for the homestead in Texas and anybody wanting to come along was welcome. Of course Harry and Bear and their families were going. Willy and Joe and their brood were going part way. We ended up with about 25 people who wanted a road trip.
But! We now have a logistical problem. We have four adults, one Kid, two babies and two big dogs- all needing to ride. Took a minute to think about it, and then I had an idea and headed for the communications shack where Kid was already at work- meaning she was reading a new history book of some kind.
I asked her to raise the fort and she did it in good order. I asked for Mr. Whipple and when he got on line I asked him what they had in the pool that would haul my growing family in comfort. He hemmed and hawed and I listened to papers rustling and then he said, “How about a Suburban?” He said he had several to choose from.
I had Kid call Ralph on the 5 watt. He answered and I explained I needed a hop to the Fort. He said cool- he wanted to go there too for something. Of course ‘They’ were listening on the house radio and showed up packing our road gear. I can’t get away with a thing. They just smiled.
I told Kid to get her road gear, and she asked what road gear was. I looked at the girls and said, “You two are failing!” They pointed to an extra pile. A car 16 with a 14 inch barrel laid on top of it. I looked at Kid and moved her shirt out of the way and saw the 9mm Commander in an inside the waistband holster with two mags on the left side. I asked for forgiveness and got laughed at. I knew Kid had been getting a ton of gun school
every day and was doing very good.
I went up the hill to kiss Beth and explain, but met her on the way down with the kids. She smiled and said, “You’re not leaving me home again for a good long while!” I was stunned, Could the babies fly? Was it safe? Beth smiled that smile and said, “Go get my gear, please.” So I did.
I called Ralph and said we needed the big bird, but he said it was already warmed up. I’m behind the curve again. We loaded up and were in the air in minutes. That’s when I realized Sandy was the pilot in command! I just watched as she handled the plane like a champ. I also noticed Ralph took over the landing but Sandy was watching everything.
We were met by several golf carts and headed for the fort where we had a great lunch with the Fort folk. We were shown to our quarters, which was a big room with two king size beds. The kids had slept the entire way and were wide awake now.
Several of the ladies offered to watch the kids while Beth went car shopping with us. We were met by the two clowns who run the whole ‘pile’, as they call it.
They had already pulled out the ‘Burbs’ and had washed them. There was several in different colors and all were the top of the line- leather seats, the works. I wanted the white one, ‘they’ wanted the black one and Beth liked the gun metal gray one. Off to the side was a Suburban-looking vehicle that wasn’t. It was a ¾ ton 4x4 Ford Excursion and while it wasn’t new it was close and it was a diesel! It was also kind of a gray color. I loved it because it was a diesel and it was huge looking. It had been checked over by the gear heads (who looked just like ours at home- there must be a place that turns them out). It had passed their test and was ready to roll but for a few things they wanted to add.
The gear heads said by tomorrow afternoon it would have another fuel tank and a heavy duty crash bumper front and rear and towing set up. I wanted a nap, the girls wanted to ‘shop’. Beth went with me. So did Mr. Whipple who always seems to feel the need to stay away from ‘them’.
Beth and I had the place to ourselves; the babies were off with the fort ladies being spoiled. We had a very nice nap, and were awakened by ‘Them’ who were back with the babies and bags of goodies. Beth joined them while I played with the kids who were tired from all the attention. We went back to sleep. I love my babies.. (“John!”) Yeah yeah.. Bite me.
We stayed at the Fort for two more days while the shop crew turned that very high dollar Excursion into a war wagon. They found a nice cargo trailer to drag along. All in all it was a nice set up; some weapons racks to hold most of the long guns we roll with and a steel lock box in the back for more. We can pad it for the dogs to ride on, and with three row seats we have room for all of us and the babies’ car seats in the last row. Good to go!
Mr. Whipple waited until I was alone to ask me to sign the papers for the stuff we were taking. I humored him this time. The girls had managed to control themselves in their container crawling and hadn’t taken a truckload of stuff. None of it girly stuff; all war fighting gear, as if we aren’t loaded with that stuff at home. I think they just feel they need to shop. They are girls after all.
We headed home early and made it in good time. We spent the next three days getting the trailer loaded with necessary stuff. I had to explain the meaning of ‘necessary’ to ‘Them’. they wanted to load rocket launchers (just in case). I settled with allowing the old bloop gun to come along. I swear these two would have argued with King Leonidas about the lack of extra spears. And they would have won the argument.
We rolled out on a nice fall day, which made the driving very pleasant. The kids were sitting up and looking around; they had decided road trips were cool. The rest of the travelers were strung out behind us, one scout rig leading with one pulling drag.
We rolled into Shiprock to find Charley and Old woman waiting. Surprising the crap out of me they had their gear packed in a hummer and were going along. Old woman said she had never seen East Texas. She also wanted to see if Bear was really the runt of the litter in his family. She had Bear’s number and he was a kitten around her. It was very funny and the girls gave him a ton of crap over it.
I was very pleased to have them along. Charley was my spirit brother and we were almost as in touch as the girls are- almost. We spent the night there, rolled out early, pushed hard and made it to the state line security station that Bear and Harry had worked for a couple of years and where we met.
We rolled in and were greeted by the new commander since Harry left. He was one of the people we knew but standing beside him was a giant- a giant ‘Bear’ and our Bear was…well, running is not the right word; rumbling maybe at the giant and hit him at full speed (bear speed that is) and t
o our amazement he bounced off, causing the big guy to laugh and grab him around the neck and do the old Southern thing called Scobbing his knob’. (Yankees call it ‘giving a nooggie’ but they be strange)which hurts! It’s a knuckle rub on the head. Bear couldn’t get away!
My girls were loving it and it was pretty funny. Then a tiny woman with gray hair and a stick took to whacking on the big guy who was laughing but finally let go. Then more big people showed up and I knew Bear was in his den.
We met the entire Bear clan and they were all big except the tiny woman who brought them into the world. How she survived I’ll never know. Harry and his wife’s people were there to greet them too. After meeting all of them they headed for the family homesteads while we rolled on to our family homestead.
We made it and were greeted at the gate by guards that knew us and we rolled right on in. And there was my other love Miz Sheri waiting by the big tent we use when we are there. The Cabin was empty and Old Woman was going to use it. Charley would tent it along with the others who came along.
We got settled and had a good long visit with Sheri who filled us in on the doings there; all was well, quiet and people living as they should. The gardens were feeding the whole homestead plus extra to barter.