The Convenience of Lies

by K. A. Castillo

  My day couldn't get any better when I traipse into the kitchen and find out that my mom is going over to her boyfriend's house again. Mom's boyfriend is about to leave for Europe tomorrow, and so she wants to say bye to him. I figure Mom won't be home until really late, or maybe not even until the morning. What a perfect opportunity to implement my new plan!

  So, Ramon comes over, and I'm hoping to go in for the kill tonight. I am having trouble containing my giddy excitement and remaining cool. I feel so awkward that it's hard for me to make conversation with him, and so I settle with saying nothing while fidgeting as I sit next to him on my couch. Finally Ramon ends the silence by talking about Kira's brother, Dimitri. Dimitri had been over at Ramon's house one day when Ramon's neighbor, Alicia, came by also.

  Ramon noticed that Dimitri had been flirting with Alicia quite a lot. After Alicia left, Dimitri said, “Damn she was hot! Ramon I want to hook up with your neighbor.”

  So Ramon tells me that Dimitri wants his neighbor. That's nice, why do I care? Then Ramon says, “But you know, I think she's hot too.” I feel my stomach lurch, and my whole body freezes as if it's wishing to stop time.

  “Really?” Is all I can squeak out.

  “Yeah. I think I'm going to ask her for her phone number next time I see her. She has the perfect skin, it's not pasty white, and it's not too dark. It's golden-brown. Just right.” Suddenly I become aware of how pale I am. I have always been the whitest person in the family, but I have always passed it off as being fair. Now I see my skin as an empty canvas that's yearning to be painted by the sun's rays. But a tan is temporary and hard to hold up during the colder months. A tan is all I can do to solve the problem, and I know it's still not good enough. Is the color of my skin really so repulsive that it would deter guys, especially Ramon, from dating me?

  “But Dimitri has an advantage because he's Russian, and so is Alicia.” Ramon adds this like he thinks I am going to be happy for him and help him figure out how to get Alicia. Does he have any grasp of what he's doing to me? First he gives me reason to believe he's not into me, when he knows I'm crazy about him, and then he has the indecency to imply he wants me to encourage him to see this other girl. Where's the benefit in that for me?

  With these thoughts swimming where I can barely catch them, I say flatly, “Yes, but you are her neighbor.” Ramon doesn't notice the ice in my voice. Every second, new fish are added to the pond in my brain as it processes what's happening. Why had Ramon given me that massage when he really didn't like me more than a friend, and why is he going for Alicia? Ramon does not even know Alicia nearly as well as he knows me. How could he be so sure that she is right for him? All he has told me about Alicia is how hot she is, and that's it. Obviously Ramon is just being shallow. I can't believe it. I am so sick of shallow people! I thought that Ramon had more dimensions to him than that, but I guess not.

  “Do you like her just for her looks?” I ask Ramon.

  “Of course not; she's a great person. The looks are just a plus.”

  “But, you didn't like her until Dimitri said something?” I say skeptically. It seems like Ramon wants Alicia just because someone else has labeled her as desirable, not because he genuinely has interest in her.

  Right then Ramon is saved from answering because we hear my garage door opening. Damn that thing is loud! But I'm not complaining because it's a signal that mom is home. Our eyes get wide with fear.

  Ramon asks “Is that your mom?” Quickly forgetting Alicia, I start to strategize how to prevent my mom from knowing Ramon is here.

  “YES! Go to my room NOW! Hide in there. I will figure out how to sneak you out.” I grab Ramon's arm and drag him down the hall as fast as I can while I say this. Ramon climbs in my closet; it's a tight fit, and I close the door. Now I have bought us some time.

  I head back into the kitchen, which is where my mom will come in through the garage, and notice Ramon's shoes sitting by the front door. My family has this thing with taking off our shoes to save the carpet. I grab his shoes, rush back to my room, hide them under the bed, and sprint back to the kitchen, feeling my heart pound, and appreciating the fact that we have a small house. Then my cell phone goes off. It's Ramon.

  “I left my wallet and my keys on your couch,” he says and hangs up.

  I pick up the keys and the wallet, and once again make my hastened journey to my room and back to the kitchen, praying that my mom won't come in before I finish and catch me wildly running throughout the house.

  Mom walks in just as I manage to make myself look casual in the kitchen. Whew! Thank goodness my mom takes forever to park and get around to coming into the house. I have always wondered why it takes her so long, but now I'm realizing it's a blessing.

  “Hi,” she says, “I'm really tired, so I'm going to take a shower and get to bed. Will you be alright with getting yourself dinner?”

  “I already ate.” Realizing that this is my chance to get Ramon out of the house I say, “You look tired.” I am trying to keep the conversation as short as possible, and I'm urging her toward the bathroom. Our bathroom has this lovely fan that is extremely loud; it sounds like a gutted boar wailing its last sounds to the world. She won't be able to hear a thing as Ramon leaves.

  Mom realizes I am not in the mood to chat and locks herself into the bathroom. I wait a couple minutes, and when I hear the shower running, I know that she won't be out for quite a while.

  I open the closet in my room and peer into it, suddenly aware of how uncomfortably close my face is to Ramon's. We are almost kissing. I wish! “Ramon, my mom is in the shower. You should sneak out now,” I say as I jump back to get out of the close proximity, hoping that Ramon doesn't think anything of it.

  “Are you sure?” He asks me.

  “Yes. Here's your stuff.” I hand him what I had rushed to keep my mom from seeing. “Now come! Quick!” I'm beckoning Ramon toward the front door.

  He starts creeping out. His baggy black sweatpants are rubbing against each other, making a mess of noise. I give him an earnest look, and he grabs onto them to keep them from rubbing.

  “Hurry!” I whisper through gritted teeth. In what seems like a decade, Ramon has made it to my front door.

  “Bye,” I say, and open it for him. The door screeches, and the chimes on it ring as if there is no tomorrow. It doesn't help that the bathroom is right next to the front door.

  Ramon and I grimace at each other. “Tell your mom you went out to get something from your car. Bye,” he suggests to cover up this hiccup, and leaps out of the door. Before I can even react, Ramon is streaking across my front lawn. He looks almost pathetic with just his white socks on, running for his life. I step outside and close the door behind me. I watch him run around the corner to his car, keeping him in sight as long as I can, and a few minutes later he is gone. That visit was much shorter than I had expected.

  I go back inside, opening and closing the door loudly so that my mom will hear it. If Mom hears the door open and close twice, she will think that I went outside for some reason, not that somebody has just left.

  I throw myself onto my bed and let out a sigh. Finally I have a chance to process what Ramon just told me about Alicia. I feel like there's a vacuum inside of my chest, sucking out all of my excitement and leaving it hollow. What rotten luck! It's as if he knew what my plans were and tried to head them off by telling me not to even bother trying. He couldn't have known my plans. I guess Ramon really doesn't like me; my chances with him are over. I bury my face in my pillow and cry myself to sleep.

  Chapter Three

  I am woken up by my phone ringing. I grunt, stretch, and then the events of last night hit me like a wall. My eyes are all dry and sticky from crying. I need to figure out a way to feel okay with Alicia enticing my crush's fancies. He probably won't go out with Alicia because he doesn't even know her. It should be really obvious to Alicia that Ramon is only interested in her looks because it is to me, at least. Ramon is probably not actually serious about dating her a
nyway. I manage to comfort myself and convince myself that Ramon's interest in Alicia is a fleeting desire and will dissipate quickly. Alicia is not a threat.

  With this settled in my mind, I roll over to look at the time. It's 12 noon. Even though I have just gotten eleven hours of sleep, I scowl at the fact I've been woken up. I look to see who is causing this disturbance, and it's Shane. Shane likes to hang out at Gameland, and like Ramon, is also Hispanic. But, Shane has a much darker skin tone and is heavy set. He has a pimple next to the base of his nose, which has been there so long that I find myself wondering how long a single pimple can possibly last. It is a white head that is swollen and raised, making it look like a miniature mountain on his face. It is definitely overdue to get popped. Every time I see him, I wonder why he doesn't just pop that thing, especially since it has been there for at least six months. Shane has long black hair that extends to the middle of his back, and he's about the same height as me. Shane listens to heavy metal, and seems to feel this need to “improve” my taste in music, or basically make me like what he likes. So whenever he calls me and gets my voicemail, he leaves a long segment from some song he thinks I should like. He is definitely a head banger, but a sweetheart as well. I met Shane last school year in our video production class, and this is my first time hearing from him this summer. Curious to know why he is calling, I answer the phone.

  “Hello.” My voice sounds grumbly and muffled.

  “Hey Mackenzie, did I wake you up?” Shane asks incredulously.

  “Yeah,” I manage to grunt out as I try to clear my throat.

  “If you want, I can call back later.”

  “No, it's ok, I'm awake now.”

  “Seriously Mackenzie, I can call you later.” Why is he insisting on calling me later? I don't play games. I say what I mean. And I've said it's okay and I'm awake. I would prefer to not have to insist.

  “No really, I should be getting up anyway. What's up?” I try to conceal my annoyance.

  “I wanted to know if you would like to come over and go swimming,” Shane tells me sheepishly.

  Now I am fully awake. My house doesn't have air conditioning, and we don't have a pool, so I'll take any opportunity I can get to cool off during the blistering summer. I can feel already that my face is clammy with sweat, and I've been sweating so much my pajama shirt is soaked. Swimming sounds just like the refresher I need. “Sure, I'd like to. What time?”

  “How about at 1:00?”

  Perfect. It is the best time to start anything.

  An hour later, I am knocking on Shane's door, looking forward to hitting the pool. As Shane opens the door, I see that there's another person at his house too. I recognize him as Towering-Guy who had given me directions on my first day at Verdad High.

  “This is Cody,” says Shane. We wave at each other from across the room.

  Now I get the opportunity to give Cody a closer look. I think he's wearing the same pair of small, black, glasses as the last time I saw him. Like Shane, Cody is also Hispanic. But unlike Shane, Cody looks like he could put on a few pounds. Cody probably can't keep on weight because he never seems to stop moving and fidgeting, like there's something inside him, vibrating, fighting to come out. He can't seem to be able to sit still. As it turns out, Cody has ADHD. His hair is black and is shaved short in the back, but is a couple of inches long by his face, giving him the look of almost having bangs that he is constantly brushing out of his eyes. I am having trouble deciding if his hair is greasy or if it always kind of clings together.

  “Would you like something to drink, Mackenzie?” Shane asks me. Wow! Shane is actually acting like a gentleman.

  “Sure, what have you got?”

  “We have coke, orange juice, milk, water…” Shane's voice trails off as he is finishing his list of possibilities.

  “I'll have some coke.”

  “Alrighty.” Shane takes out one of those liter bottles and a cup, adds ice, and fills it up. I was expecting just a can; this is a nice surprise. I take a sip. I didn't realize how parched my tongue was until it meets the wet freshness of the coke. Then, I can feel it going all of the way down into my tummy, cooling everything off from the inside out.

  “You guys want to head out to the pool?” Cody asks. He is already jumping off his chair and looking outside at the pool.

  “Do you want to?” Shane asks, looking right at me. I realize I'm getting the biggest vote, probably because I'm a girl. I certainly won't complain about this new status.

  “Yes, let's!” I can't conceal my excitement to get into that pool. That's why I'm here. Shane is out the door the second I'm done talking. He rips off his shirt, throws it to the side, and jumps into the pool with a huge splash! I feel a few drops of water land on me.

  I try to shield my drink from the chlorinated water flying through the air and decide to place it on a table as far away from the pool as possible. As I take off my shirt and shorts, I place them on top of my drink to keep the wasps out of it. I can feel the boys checking me out as I strip down. It's like I'm giving them a show they're supposed to pretend not to watch, which I frankly wish they wouldn't. I feel like they are undressing me with their eyes once I get down to just my bikini. At the very least they are imagining me in my underwear. To try to avoid their prying eyes, I speed up getting ready. I kick off my flip flops, and suddenly become acutely aware that the white concrete is so hot it feels as if it's frying off the skin from the bottom of my feet, like they are being prepared for a BBQ dinner. No wonder Cody was running.

  I run too, and jump into the pool gracefully, feet first, my body straight like a pencil. It's like I'm slicing through the water with a knife, making the smallest splash possible. Shane takes a seat on the side of the pool.

  “Come in and join us!” Cody insists.

  “Nah, it's alright, I'll keep an eye on Mackenzie's drink.” He gestures to where my drink is sitting, hidden beneath my clothes.

  This is my first time ever in Shane's back yard. Now that I'm not so distracted with the pool, I have a chance to look around. His backyard is mostly covered with loose dirt, the kind that will get all over anything that touches it, like powder. Shane's backyard is also huge. It's only the width of the pool, but so long that I can't see the back of it. This is partly because my view is obstructed by multiple wooden walls and structures that have been built periodically throughout the yard, giving the yard the sense of being separated into multiple sections. Aside from where the pool is, the whole yard has a sense of abandonment. The wooden structures look as if they were built decades ago and in some places have rotted away. Other parts even look charred, like they have been mysteriously burned. There's a tire swing hanging slightly hidden behind one of the wood structures, but I don't think I would trust it. The tire looks cracked like faux leather that has seen too many days, and can barely hold up its own weight, let alone mine. Also, its chains have thoroughly rusted to a reddish brown. At one point I am sure the chains were a delightful, shiny silver, but those days are clearly long gone. Looking at this back yard is almost like looking at a ghost town.

  Sensing my inspection of the yard, Cody exclaims, “Isn't Shane's back yard awesome! Wouldn't it be the perfect set for a horror movie?”

  “You know what, we should make a horror movie!” Shane adds.

  Horror films tend to make it so that I can't sleep, and when I do, I get nightmares for weeks. So, I am less than enthusiastic about making one. I don't think my psyche could handle it. “Yeah, it would be fun to make a movie! But, can't we do something other than a horror film?”

  “Can't you see, Mackenzie, this backyard is perfect for a horror film. We have everything we need right here!” Cody insists.

  “What else would you suggest we do?” Shane asks me, incredulously.

  “I don't know, maybe a love story. I could star in it.” I suggest, grasping at the first words that come to mind.

  “No! There's too many movies like that!” Cody interjects.

  “We could make it
about a smart, studious girl who meets a wayward boy, and she straightens him out, making him into a better person,” I suggest, hoping this will sound unique enough for the guys to agree to it.

  “Why don't we make it about a good guy who meets a messed up girl and turns her around?” Shane suggests. He can tell from the scowl on my face that I'm not too thrilled with this idea. “What!? There are already so many movies where the girl saves the guy. Why don't we do it the other way around?”

  I'm still pursing my lips while contemplating how the boys are botching up my idea. Fortunately, I am saved from having to respond when Cody shouts out with excitement, “Let's show Mackenzie Texas Chainsaw Massacre. It's so awful, it's amazing! She will love it!” As he exclaims this, Cody jumps out of the pool.

  “Yeah, that would be awesome!” Shane agrees. “I have it right over here.” He waddles into his house to dig out his VHS of the Texas Chainsaw Massacre.

  Seeing that I have been outvoted, I wearily get out of the pool and begin to dry myself off. I pick up my drink, only to discover that most of the ice has already melted, diluting the coke. Regardless, I decide to take a sip and still enjoy the crisp coolness of the drink.

  Cody wanders up to where I am standing and drinking, and stops right in front of me, too close for comfort. I step back, grabbing my towel to dry myself off with. Ignoring my body language, Cody steps forward again, right into my personal space. What is he doing?

  “Uh, I'm trying to dry off here,” I tell him as I step back again.

  “I know. I just want to be next to you,” Cody insists. Does he not see he's in my way? I can't dry off with Cody's eyes a hand's length away from mine. He's so close, it looks like he's going cross-eyed while trying to keep his eyes focused on me. I can't help but think that he looks like a bird singling me out as its prey with his odd stare and small pointy nose.