The Complete Works of William Shakespeare In Plain and Simple English (Translated)
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that blind anger or staring rage
ever did to cause tears of soft regret.
PEMBROKE.
All murders past do stand excus'd in this;
And this, so sole and so unmatchable,
Shall give a holiness, a purity,
To the yet unbegotten sin of times,
And prove a deadly bloodshed but a jest,
Exampled by this heinous spectacle.
This murder will excuse all the ones in the past;
this one, so unique and inimitable,
will make sins yet to be committed
seem holy and pure,
and make deadly bloodshed just a joke,
when compared to this horrible sight.
BASTARD.
It is a damned and a bloody work;
The graceless action of a heavy hand,
If that it be the work of any hand.
It is a damnable and bloody deed;
the graceless action of a vicious man,
if it is in fact the work of a man.
SALISBURY.
If that it be the work of any hand!
We had a kind of light what would ensue.
It is the shameful work of Hubert's hand;
The practice and the purpose of the King;
From whose obedience I forbid my soul
Kneeling before this ruin of sweet life,
And breathing to his breathless excellence
The incense of a vow, a holy vow,
Never to taste the pleasures of the world,
Never to be infected with delight,
Nor conversant with ease and idleness,
Till I have set a glory to this hand
By giving it the worship of revenge.
If it was the work of a man!
We had a hint as to what would happen.
This is the shameful work of Hubert;
the orders come from the King;
I forbid my soul to obey him,
kneeling before this ruin of sweet life,
and in front of his dead excellence
I take a holy vow
that I will never indulge myself in any pleasure,
never enjoy anything,
never know rest or leisure,
until I have given this hand back its glory
by worshipping it with revenge.
PEMBROKE. and BIGOT.
Our souls religiously confirm thy words.
We religiously swear the same.
Enter HUBERT
HUBERT.
Lords, I am hot with haste in seeking you.
Arthur doth live; the King hath sent for you.
Lords, I have rushed as fast as I can to find you.
Arthur is alive; the King has sentfor you.
SALISBURY.
O, he is bold, and blushes not at death!
Avaunt, thou hateful villain, get thee gone!
Oh, he is bold, he doesn't blush at death!
Get out of here, you horrible villain, begone!
HUBERT.
I am no villain.
I am no villain.
SALISBURY.
Must I rob the law?[Drawing his
sword]
Must I steal the executioner's job?
BASTARD.
Your sword is bright, sir; put it up again.
Your sword is bright, sir; put it away.
SALISBURY.
Not till I sheathe it in a murderer's skin.
Not until I put it inside a murderer.
HUBERT.
Stand back, Lord Salisbury, stand back, I say;
By heaven, I think my sword's as sharp as yours.
I would not have you, lord, forget yourself,
Nor tempt the danger of my true defence;
Lest I, by marking of your rage, forget
Your worth, your greatness and nobility.
Stand back, Lord Salisbury, stand back, I say;
by heaven, I think my sword is a sharp as yours.
I don't want you, Lord, to forget yourself,
and to risk taking on my strong skills;
in case I, seeing your rage, forget
your worthiness, your greatness and your nobility.
BIGOT.
Out, dunghill! Dar'st thou brave a nobleman?
Damn you, dunghill! Do you dare to challenge a nobleman?
HUBERT.
Not for my life; but yet I dare defend
My innocent life against an emperor.
Not on my life; but I still would dare to defend
my innocent life against an emperor.
SALISBURY.
Thou art a murderer.
You are a murderer.
HUBERT.
Do not prove me so.
Yet I am none. Whose tongue soe'er speaks false,
Not truly speaks; who speaks not truly, lies.
Do not make me be one.
But I am not one. Whoever says that speaks falsely,
not truthfully; someone who does not speak truthfully is lying.
PEMBROKE.
Cut him to pieces.
Cut him to pieces.
BASTARD.
Keep the peace, I say.
Keep the peace, I say.
SALISBURY.
Stand by, or I shall gall you, Faulconbridge.
Stand aside, or I will hurt you, Faulconbridge.
BASTARD.
Thou wert better gall the devil, Salisbury.
If thou but frown on me, or stir thy foot,
Or teach thy hasty spleen to do me shame,
I'll strike thee dead. Put up thy sword betime;
Or I'll so maul you and your toasting-iron
That you shall think the devil is come from hell.
You would be better off hurting the devil, Salisbury.
If you just frown on me, or move towards me,
or try to shame me in your rash anger,
I'll strike you dead. Put away your sword at once;
or I will give you and your toasting iron such a thrashing
that you'll think the devil has come from hell.
BIGOT.
What wilt thou do, renowned Faulconbridge?
Second a villain and a murderer?
What are you going to do, renowned Faulconbridge?
Support a villain and a murderer?
HUBERT.
Lord Bigot, I am none.
Lord Bigot, I am not one.
BIGOT.
Who kill'd this prince?
Who killed this prince?
HUBERT.
'Tis not an hour since I left him well.
I honour'd him, I lov'd him, and will weep
My date of life out for his sweet life's loss.
I left him in good health not an hour ago.
I respected him, I loved him, and will weep
for the rest of my days over the loss of his sweet life.
SALISBURY.
Trust not those cunning waters of his eyes,
For villainy is not without such rheum;
And he, long traded in it, makes it seem
Like rivers of remorse and innocency.
Away with me, all you whose souls abhor
Th' uncleanly savours of a slaughter-house;
For I am stifled with this smell of sin.
Don't trust those cunning tears of his,
for villainy can always summon them up;
and he, who has had lots of practice, makes it look
as if they are rivers of remorse and innocence.
Come away with me, all of you whose souls despise
the unclean reek of the slaughterhouse;
I am choking on this smell of sin.
BIGOT.
Away toward Bury, to the Dauphin there!
Let's go to Bury, to the Dauphin!
PEMBROKE.
There tell the King he may inquire us out.
Tell the King he can find us there.
Exeunt LORDS
BASTARD.
Here's a good world! Knew you of this fair work?
Beyond the infinite and boundless reach
Of mercy, if thou didst this deed of death,
Art thou damn'd, Hubert.
Here's a fine thing! Did you know about this job?
If you did this murder, Hubert, you are dammed
beyond the infinite reach of mercy.
HUBERT.
Do but hear me, sir.
Just listen to me, sir.
BASTARD.
Ha! I'll tell thee what:
Thou'rt damn'd as black-nay, nothing is so black-
Thou art more deep damn'd than Prince Lucifer;
There is not yet so ugly a fiend of hell
As thou shalt be, if thou didst kill this child.
Ha! I'll tell you what:
you are damned as black–no, there is nothing as black–
you are more deeply damned than Prince Lucifer;
there isn't a devil in hell as ugly as you
will be, if you killed this child.
HUBERT.
Upon my soul-
I swear on my soul–
BASTARD.
If thou didst but consent
To this most cruel act, do but despair;
And if thou want'st a cord, the smallest thread
That ever spider twisted from her womb
Will serve to strangle thee; a rush will be a beam
To hang thee on; or wouldst thou drown thyself,
Put but a little water in a spoon
And it shall be as all the ocean,
Enough to stifle such a villain up.
I do suspect thee very grievously.
If you only agreed
to this terrible deed, you should despair;
and if you need a cord, the smallest thread
that a spider ever span out of her womb
will do for strangling you; a reed will make a beam
to hang you from; or if you want to drown yourself,
just put a little water in a spoon
and it will be like the whole ocean,
enough to suffocate such a villain.
I have very strong suspicions of you.
HUBERT.
If I in act, consent, or sin of thought,
Be guilty of the stealing that sweet breath
Which was embounded in this beauteous clay,
Let hell want pains enough to torture me!
I left him well.
If by action, agreement, or sinful thinking,
I was guilty of stealing away that sweet breath
which was contained within this beautiful body,
may hell run out of tortures to use on me!
I left him healthy.
BASTARD.
Go, bear him in thine arms.
I am amaz'd, methinks, and lose my way
Among the thorns and dangers of this world.
How easy dost thou take all England up!
From forth this morsel of dead royalty
The life, the right, and truth of all this realm
Is fled to heaven; and England now is left
To tug and scamble, and to part by th' teeth
The unowed interest of proud-swelling state.
Now for the bare-pick'd bone of majesty
Doth dogged war bristle his angry crest
And snarleth in the gentle eyes of peace;
Now powers from home and discontents at home
Meet in one line; and vast confusion waits,
As doth a raven on a sick-fall'n beast,
The imminent decay of wrested pomp.
Now happy he whose cloak and cincture can
Hold out this tempest. Bear away that child,
And follow me with speed. I'll to the King;
A thousand businesses are brief in hand,
And heaven itself doth frown upon the land.
Go, carry him in your arms.
I am bewildered, I think, and I have lost my way
amongst the thorns and dangers of this world.
How easy it is for you to pick up the whole of England
in the person of this dead royal body!
The life, rights and truth of this whole country
have gone to heaven; and now England is left
to push and shove, and to tear apart in their teeth
the unruled powers of the great nation.
Now the dog of war raises his angry hackles
to fight for the stripped bones of majesty
and snarls in the gentle face of peace;
now forces from abroad and civil discontent
come together as one; great chaos awaits,
like a raven hovering over a sick man,
following the general collapse when the throne is stolen.
It will be a lucky man who manages
to ride out the storm. Carry away that child,
and follow me quickly. I'll go to the king;
there are a thousand things which need seeing to,
and heaven is frowning over the country.
Exeunt
England. KING JOHN'S palace
Enter KING JOHN, PANDULPH, and attendants
KING JOHN.
Thus have I yielded up into your hand
The circle of my glory.
So I have surrendered my crown
into your hand.
PANDULPH.
[Gives back the crown]Take again
From this my hand, as holding of the Pope,
Your sovereign greatness and authority.
Take it back again
from my hand, as a representative of the Pope,
take back your royal greatness and authority.
KING JOHN.
Now keep your holy word; go meet the French;
And from his Holiness use all your power
To stop their marches fore we are inflam'd.
Our discontented counties do revolt;
Our people quarrel with obedience,
Swearing allegiance and the love of soul
To stranger blood, to foreign royalty.
This inundation of mistemp'red humour
Rests by you only to be qualified.
Then pause not; for the present time's so sick
That present med'cine must be minist'red
Or overthrow incurable ensues.
Now keep your holy word; go and meet French;
and use all power you have from the Pope
to stop their advances before we are overcome.
Our discontented counties are rebelling;
our people are refusing to obey,
swearing allegiance and pledging their souls
to foreign blood and royalty.
This flood of disordered moods
can only be abated by you.
So don't wait; the time is so sick
that it must be given medicine at once
or it will be followed by incurable collapse.
PANDULPH.
It was my breath that blew this tempest up,
Upon your stubborn usage of the Pope;
But since you are a gentle convertite,
My tongue shall hush again this storm of war
And make fair weather in your blust'ring land.
On this Ascension-day, remember well,
Upon your oath of service to the Pope,
Go I to make the French lay down their arms.
It was I who started this storm,
due to your insult to the Pope;
but since you have sweetly reconverted,
I shall calm down this storm of war
and bring fair weather to your windy land.
Remember on every Ascension day like this
your oath of service to the Pope,
and I will go and make the French retreat.
Exit
KING JOHN.
Is this Ascension-day? Did not the prophet
Say that before Ascension-day at noo
n
My crown I should give off? Even so I have.
I did suppose it should be on constraint;
But, heaven be thank'd, it is but voluntary.
Is this Ascension Day? Didn't the prophet
say that before Ascension day at noon
I should give up my crown? Well I have.
I imagined that I would be forced to;
but, thank heaven, it was only voluntary.
Enter the BASTARD
BASTARD.
All Kent hath yielded; nothing there holds out
But Dover Castle. London hath receiv'd,
Like a kind host, the Dauphin and his powers.
Your nobles will not hear you, but are gone
To offer service to your enemy;
And wild amazement hurries up and down
The little number of your doubtful friends.
All of Kent has surrendered; only Dover Castle
has resisted. London has welcomed,
like a kind host, the Dauphin and his forces.
The nobles will not listen to you, they have gone
to offer their services to your enemy;
and wild confusion is buzzing around
the small number of your fearful friends.
KING JOHN.
Would not my lords return to me again
After they heard young Arthur was alive?
Wouldn't my Lords come back to me
after they heard young Arthur was alive?
BASTARD.
They found him dead, and cast into the streets,
An empty casket, where the jewel of life
By some damn'd hand was robbed and ta'en away.
They found him dead, and thrown into the street,
an empty casket from which some damnable hand