The Complete Works of William Shakespeare In Plain and Simple English (Translated)

by William Shakespeare

  Oh, lasting shame! Let’s kill ourselves. Are these the same wretches we were gambling on?

  Orleans

  Is this the king we sent to for his ransom?

  Is this the king we questioned about his ransom?

  Bourbon

  Shame and eternal shame, nothing but shame! Let's die in honour! Once more back again! And he that will not follow Bourbon now, Let him go hence, and with his cap in hand, Like a base pandar, hold the chamber door Whilst by a slave, no gentler than my dog, His fairest daughter is contaminated.

  Shame, shame, and more shame! Let’s die with honor. Let’s go back once again. Anyone who will not return with me can back with his hat in his hand and stand by the bedroom door of his daughter being taken by a slave.

  Constable

  Disorder, that hath spoil'd us, friend us now! Let us on heaps go offer up our lives.

  We need order! Let’s go together, if we must die.

  Orleans

  We are enow yet living in the field To smother up the English in our throngs, If any order might be thought upon.

  We are not enough to take England, if you want to talk about order.

  Bourbon

  The devil take order now! I'll to the throng. Let life be short, else shame will be too long.

  To hell with order, now! I’ll go into battle. Let life be short or shame will be too long.

  Exit.

  Trumpets sound. Enter King Henry and forces, Exeter, and others.

  King

  Well have we done, thrice valiant countrymen. But all's not done; yet keep the French the field.

  We have done well, my valiant countrymen. But, we are not finished with the French still on the field.

  Exeter

  The Duke of York commends him to your Majesty.

  The Duke of York wanted me to send you his regards.

  King

  Lives he, good uncle? Thrice within this hour I saw him down; thrice up again, and fighting. From helmet to the spur all blood he was.

  He is still alive, good uncle? I saw him three times within the hour. He was down, then up and fighting again. He was covered from head to toe in blood.

  Exeter

  In which array, brave soldier, doth he lie, Larding the plain; and by his bloody side, Yoke-fellow to his honour-owing wounds, The noble Earl of Suffolk also lies. Suffolk first died; and York, all haggled over, Comes to him, where in gore he lay insteeped, And takes him by the beard; kisses the gashes That bloodily did yawn upon his face. He cries aloud, "Tarry, my cousin Suffolk! My soul shall thine keep company to heaven; Tarry, sweet soul, for mine, then fly abreast, As in this glorious and well-foughten field We kept together in our chivalry." Upon these words I came and cheer'd him up. He smil'd me in the face, raught me his hand, And, with a feeble gripe, says, "Dear my lord, Commend my service to my sovereign." So did he turn and over Suffolk's neck He threw his wounded arm and kiss'd his lips; And so espous'd to death, with blood he seal'd A testament of noble-ending love. The pretty and sweet manner of it forc'd Those waters from me which I would have stopp'd; But I had not so much of man in me, And all my mother came into mine eyes And gave me up to tears.

  The brave soldier lies wounded in the field beside the noble Earl of Suffolk. As Suffolk died, York went over and took him by the beard and kissed his cuts and cried, “Wait, dear cousin Suffolk? My soul will keep yours company on the way to heaven. Wait, sweet soul, we will fly as we fought, side-by-side.” I went to him while he was talking to cheer him up. He smiled at me and took my hand and with a feeble grip said, “Commend me to the king.” Then he turned and threw his wounded arm over Suffolk’s neck and kissed his lips. With noble love, his life ended. I couldn’t help but cry.

  King

  I blame you not; For, hearing this, I must perforce compound With mistful eyes, or they will issue too.

  I don’t blame you, because after hearing this I must hold my tears back.

  Trumpet sounds.

  But hark! what new alarum is this same? The French have reinforc'd their scatter'd men. Then every soldier kill his prisoners; Give the word through.

  Listen! What new alarm is this? The French have brought in reinforcements. Let our men kill their prisoners. Go tell them.

  Exit.

  Enter Fluellen and Gower.

  Fluellen

  Kill the poys and the luggage! 'Tis expressly against the law of arms. 'Tis as arrant a piece of knavery, mark you now, as can be offer't; in your conscience, now, is it not?

  They killed the boys with the luggage? It’s against the law or war. I think it’s villainous. Don’t you?

  Gower

  'Tis certain there's not a boy left alive; and the cowardly rascals that ran from the battle ha' done this slaughter. Besides, they have burned and carried away all that was in the King's tent; wherefore the King, most worthily, hath caus'd every soldier to cut his prisoner's throat. O, 'tis a gallant king!

  It’s certain no boy is left alive and the cowards that ran from the battle performed the slaughter. They also burned and carried away all that was in the king’s tent, so the king’s called for all prisoners to be executed. He’s such a gallant king!

  Fluellen

  Ay, he was porn at Monmouth, Captain Gower. What call you the town's name where Alexander the Pig was born?

  Yes, he was born at Monmouth, Captain Gower. What’s the name of the where Alexander the Pig was born?

  Gower

  Alexander the Great.

  Alexander the Great.

  Fluellen

  Why, I pray you, is not pig great? The pig, or the great, or the mighty, or the huge, or the magnanimous, are all one reckonings, save the phrase is a little variations.

  Isn’t that the same thing?

  Gower

  I think Alexander the Great was born in Macedon. His father was called Philip of Macedon, as I take it.

  I think he was born in Macedon. His father was Philip of Macedon, I think.

  Fluellen

  I think it is in Macedon where Alexander is porn. I tell you, Captain, if you look in the maps of the 'orld, I warrant you sall find, in the comparisons between Macedon and Monmouth, that the situations, look you, is both alike. There is a river in Macedon; and there is also moreover a river at Monmouth; it is call'd Wye at Monmouth; but it is out of my prains what is the name of the other river; but 'tis all one, 'tis alike as my fingers is to my fingers, and there is salmons in both. If you mark Alexander's life well, Harry of Monmouth's life is come after it indifferent well; for there is figures in all things. Alexander, God knows, and you know, in his rages, and his furies, and his wraths, and his cholers, and his moods, and his displeasures, and his indignations, and also being a little intoxicates in his prains, did, in his ales and his angers, look you, kill his best friend, Cleitus.

  I think it is Macedon. Macedon and Monmouth are very similar if you look at a map. They both have rivers. Wye river is in Monmouth, but I can’t remember what the other river is. If you compare Alexander’s and Harry’s lives, they are not very different. God knows, you know, in his anger and bad moods, along with ale, Alexander killed his best friend, Cleitus.

  Gower

  Our King is not like him in that. He never kill'd any of his friends.

  Our king is not like him in that. He never killed any of his friends.

  Fluellen

  It is not well done, mark you now, to take the tales out of my mouth, ere it is made and finished. I speak but in the figures and comparisons of it. As Alexander kill'd his friend Cleitus, being in his ales and his cups; so also Harry Monmouth, being in his right wits and his good judgements, turn'd away the fat knight with the great belly doublet. He was full of jests, and gipes, and knaveries, and mocks; I have forgot his name.

  It’s not nice to take think you know what I’m saying before I finish. I’m only comparing the two. Alexander, drunk and angry, killed his friend Cleitus, like Harry, smart and wise, turned away that fat knight who was full of jokes and misch
ief. I have forgotten his name.

  Gower

  Sir John Falstaff.

  Sir John Falstaff.

  Fluellen

  That is he. I'll tell you there is good men porn at Monmouth.

  That’s him. There are good men born at Monmouth, I’ll tell you.

  Gower

  Here comes his Majesty.

  Here comes his majesty.

  Trumpet sounds. Enter King Henry, and forces; Warwick, Gloucester, Exeter, and others.

  King

  I was not angry since I came to France Until this instant. Take a trumpet, herald; Ride thou unto the horsemen on yond hill. If they will fight with us, bid them come down, Or void the field; they do offend our sight. If they'll do neither, we will come to them, And make them skirr away, as swift as stones Enforced from the old Assyrian slings. Besides, we'll cut the throats of those we have, And not a man of them that we shall take Shall taste our mercy. Go and tell them so.

  I was not angry when I came to France, until now. Take a trumpet and herald and ride up to the horseman on the hill, and tell them if they want fight, bring it on, or get away from the field. If they won’t do either, we will go to them, and make them run as swift as stones thrown from Assyrian slings. In addition, tell them we’re going to execute the men we have. No Frenchmen will have mercy. Go tell them.

  Enter Montjoy.

  Exeter

  Here comes the herald of the French, my liege.

  Here comes the herald of the French, my king.

  Gloucester

  His eyes are humbler than they us'd to be.

  He looks more humble than before.

  King

  How now! what means this, herald? Know'st thou not That I have fin'd these bones of mine for ransom? Com'st thou again for ransom?

  Hey! What now, herald? Don’t you know these fine bones are not for ransom? Have you come again?

  Montjoy

  No, great King; I come to thee for charitable license, That we may wander o'er this bloody field To book our dead, and then to bury them; To sort our nobles from our common men. For many of our princes--woe the while!-- Lie drown'd and soak'd in mercenary blood; So do our vulgar drench their peasant limbs In blood of princes; and their wounded steeds Fret fetlock deep in gore, and with wild rage Yerk out their armed heels at their dead masters, Killing them twice. O, give us leave, great King, To view the field in safety, and dispose Of their dead bodies!

  No, great king. I come to you for your charity. We would like to look over this bloody field for our dead so we may bury them. We would like to sort our nobles from the common men because there are many princes dead in the field. We would also like to get the horses that are on the field stomping the bodies. Please let us onto the field, great king, to find the bodies and bury them.

  King

  I tell thee truly, herald, I know not if the day be ours or no; For yet a many of your horsemen peer And gallop o'er the field.

  I tell you, herald, I don’t know if the day is ours. Many of your friends still ride in the field.

  Montjoy

  The day is yours.

  The day is yours.

  King

  Praised be God, and not our strength, for it! What is this castle call'd that stands hard by?

  Praise be to God. What is that castle called?

  Montjoy

  They call it Agincourt.

  They call it Agincourt.

  King

  Then call we this the field of Agincourt, Fought on the day of Crispin Crispianus.

  Then we will call this the field of Agincourt, and the battle was fought on the day of Crispin Crispianus.

  Fluellen

  Your grandfather of famous memory, an't please your Majesty, and your great-uncle Edward the Plack Prince of Wales, as I have read in the chronicles, fought a most prave pattle here in France.

  Your grandfather and your great-uncle Edward the Black Prince of Wales, as I have read, fought a most brave battle here in France.

  King

  They did, Fluellen.

  They did, Fluellen.

  Fluellen

  Your Majesty says very true. If your Majesties is rememb'red of it, the Welshmen did good service in garden where leeks did grow, wearing leeks in their Monmouth caps; which, your Majesty know, to this hour is an honourable badge of the service; and I do believe your Majesty takes no scorn to wear the leek upon Saint Tavy's day.

  If I remember correctly, the Welshmen fought bravely in a garden where they grew leeks. Now wearing leeks in Monmouth caps is a badge of honor. I believe you wear a leek on Saint Davy’s Day, your Majesty.

  King

  I wear it for a memorable honour; For I am Welsh, you know, good countryman.

  I wear it to honor their memory. You know I am Welsh.

  Fluellen

  All the water in Wye cannot wash your Majesty's Welsh plood out of your pody, I can tell you that. Got pless it and preserve it, as long as it pleases His grace, and His majesty too!

  All the water in the Wye could not wash out your majesty’s Welsh blood. May God bless it and keep it safe, as long as it pleases Him and your majesty!

  King

  Thanks, good my countryman.

  Thanks, my good countryman.

  Fluellen

  By Jeshu, I am your Majesty's countryman, I care not who know it. I will confess it to all the 'orld. I need not be asham'd of your Majesty, praised be God, so long as your Majesty is an honest man.

  By God, I am your majesty’s countryman. I don’t care who knows it. I will confess it to the world. I don’t need to be ashamed of your majesty as long as he is an honest man.

  King

  God keep me so! Our heralds go with him; Bring me just notice of the numbers dead On both our parts. Call yonder fellow hither.

  May God keep me that way. Heralds go with Montjoy. Find out how many are dead, both English and French. Tell him to come here.

  Points to Williams. Exit Heralds with Montjoy.

  Exeter

  Soldier, you must come to the King.

  Soldier, you must come to the king.

  King

  Soldier, why wear'st thou that glove in thy cap?

  Soldier, why are wearing that glove in your cap?

  Williams

  An't please your Majesty, 'tis the gage of one that I should fight withal, if he be alive.

  If it pleases you your majesty, it’s the glove of a man I will fight, if I ever see him alive again.

  King

  An Englishman?

  An Englishman?

  Williams

  An't please your Majesty, a rascal that swagger'd with me last night; who, if alive and ever dare to challenge this glove, I have sworn to take him a box o' the ear; or if I can see my glove in his cap, which he swore, as he was a soldier, he would wear if alive, I will strike it out soundly.

  It was a rascal that argued with me last night, who if I see alive again have sworn to give him a knock up against his head. Or, if I see my glove in his cap, which he swore as a soldier he would, I will knock him in the head.

  King

  What think you, Captain Fluellen? Iis it fit this soldier keep his oath?

  What do you think, Captain Fluellen? Is it proper for this soldier to keep his oath?

  Fluellen

  He is a craven and a villain else, an't please your Majesty, in my conscience.

  He would be crazy and a villain not to, if I may say so.

  King

  It may be his enemy is a gentlemen of great sort, quite from the answer of his degree.

  It may be his enemy is a gentleman beyond reproach.

  Fluellen

  Though he be as good a gentleman as the devil is, as Lucifier and Belzebub himself, it is necessary, look your Grace, that he keep his vow and his oath. If he be perjur'd, see you now, his reputation is as arrant a villain and a Jacksauce, as ever his black shoe trod upon God's ground and His earth, in my conscience, la!

  He may be as g
ood a gentleman as the devil or Lucifer and Beelzebub, but it is necessary for him to keep his oath or be considered a liar or worse, a villain.

  King

  Then keep thy vow, sirrah, when thou meet'st the fellow.

  Then keep your vow, sir, when you meet the fellow.

  Williams

  So I will, my liege, as I live.

  I will, my liege, I swear on my life.

  King

  Who serv'st thou under?

  Who do you serve under?

  Williams

  Under Captain Gower, my liege.

  Captain Gower, my liege.

  Fluellen

  Gower is a good captain, and is good knowledge and literatured in the wars.