The Complete Works of William Shakespeare In Plain and Simple English (Translated)
Page 261
Was sitting, as I say, in a low chair, sir; ‘it was inthe Bunch of Grapes, where indeed you have a delight
The room called Bunch of Grapes, where indeed you liketo sit, have you not?
To sit, do you not?
FROTH
I have so; because it is an open room and good for winter.
I do like it; because it is an public room and good for winter.
POMPEY
Why, very well, then; I hope here be truths.
Why, very well, ten; I hope this is the truth.
ANGELO
This will last out a night in Russia,
This will take a very long time, like Russian nights,When nights are longest there: I'll take my leave.
As nights are the longest there: I’ll take my leave.And leave you to the hearing of the cause;
And leave you to the hearing of the case;Hoping you'll find good cause to whip them all.
I hope you’ll find a good reason to whip them all.
ESCALUS
I think no less. Good morrow to your lordship.
I think the same. Good night to you lordship.
Exit ANGELO
Now, sir, come on: what was done to Elbow's wife, once more?
Now, sir, come on: Once more, what was done to Elbow’s wife?
POMPEY
Once, sir? there was nothing done to her once.
Once, sir? There was nothing done to her once.
ELBOW
I beseech you, sir, ask him what this man did to my wife.
I implore you, sir, ask him what this man did to my wife/
POMPEY
I beseech your honour, ask me.
I implore your honor, ask me.
ESCALUS
Well, sir; what did this gentleman to her?
Well, sir; what did this gentleman do to her?
POMPEY
I beseech you, sir, look in this gentleman's face.
I implore you, sir, look in this gentleman’s faceGood Master Froth, look upon his honour; 'tis for a
Good Master Froth, look at his honor, it is for a good purpose. Doth your honour mark his face?
Good reason. Does your honor take note of his face?
ESCALUS
Ay, sir, very well.
Yes, sir, very well.
POMPEY
Nay; I beseech you, mark it well.
No, I implore you, not it well.
ESCALUS
Well, I do so.
Well, I do so.
POMPEY
Doth your honour see any harm in his face?
Does your honor see any malice in his face?
ESCALUS
Why, no.
Why, no.
POMPEY
I'll be supposed upon a book, his face is the worst
I’ll swear on the Bible, the rest of him is as harmlessthing about him. Good, then; if his face be the
As his face. Good, then; if the rest of him is worst thing about him, how could Master Froth do the
As harmless as his face, how could Master Frother do theconstable's wife any harm? I would know that of
Constable’s wife any harm? I would know if that has happenedyour honour.
Your honor.
ESCALUS
He's in the right. Constable, what say you to it?
He’s right. Constable, what do you have to say about it?
ELBOW
First, an it like you, the house is a respected
First, if it please you, the house is a ‘respected’house; next, this is a respected fellow; and his
House; next, this is a ‘respected’ fellow; and hismistress is a respected woman.
Mistress is a ‘respected’ woman.
POMPEY
By this hand, sir, his wife is a more respected
By these facts, sir, his wife is the most ‘respected’person than any of us all.
Person of us all. [Aside] That fool Elbow thinks we mean suspected of sexual dealings.
ELBOW
Varlet, thou liest; thou liest, wicked varlet! The
Scoundrel, you lie; you like, horrible scoundrel! The time has yet to come that she was ever respected
Time hasn’t yet come that she was ever ‘respected’with man, woman, or child.
To be with any man, woman, or child.
POMPEY
Sir, she was respected with him before he married with her.
Sir, she was ‘respected’ with him before he married her.
ESCALUS
Which is the wiser here? Justice or Iniquity? Is
Which is true here? The character of Justice or Injustice? Isthis true?
This true?
ELBOW
O thou caitiff! O thou varlet! O thou wicked
Oh you villain! Oh you scoundrel! Oh you wickedHannibal! I respected with her before I was married
Hannibal—I mean cannibal! To think I ‘respected’ with her before I was marriedto her! If ever I was respected with her, or she
To her! If ever I was ‘resepcted’ with her, or she with me, let not your worship think me the poor
With me, then your honor don’t think that I am theduke's officer. Prove this, thou wicked Hannibal, or
Duke’s poor constable. Prove this, you terrible Hannibal, orI'll have mine action of battery on thee.
I’ll my lawsuit for assault on you.
ESCALUS
If he took you a box o' the ear, you might have your
If he hit you, you might have youraction of slander too.
Lawsuit for slander too. Hah, again, he confused his words.
ELBOW
Marry, I thank your good worship for it. What is't
I swear on the Virgin Mary, I thank you good honor for that. What doyour worship's pleasure I shall do with this wicked caitiff?
You want, you honor, for me to do with this wicked villain?
ESCALUS
Truly, officer, because he hath some offences in him
It is true, officer, since he has committed some offencesthat thou wouldst discover if thou couldst, let him
That you would reveal if you could, let himcontinue in his courses till thou knowest what they
Continue in his way of life till you know what the offencesare.
Are.
ELBOW
Marry, I thank your worship for it. Thou seest, thou
By the Virgin Mary, I thank your honor for this. You see, youwicked varlet, now, what's come upon thee: thou art
Wicked scoundrel, now, what is about to happen to you: you areto continue now, thou varlet; thou art to continue.
To continue now, you scoundrel: you are to continue.
ESCALUS
Where were you born, friend?
Where were you born, friend?
FROTH
Here in Vienna, sir.
Here in Vienna, sir.
ESCALUS
Are you of fourscore pounds a year?
Do you make 80 pounds a year?
FROTH
Yes, an't please you, sir.
Yes, if it pleases you, sir.
ESCALUS
So. What trade are you of, sir?
So. What is your occupation, sor?
POMPHEY
Tapster; a poor widow's tapster.
A bar man; a poor widow’s bar man.
ESCALUS
Your mistress' name?
What is your mistress’ name?
POMPHEY
Mistress Overdone.
Mistress Overdone.
ESCALUS
Hath she had any more than one husband?
Did she have more than one husband?
POMPEY
Nine, sir; Overdone by the last.
Nine, sir; She got the name Overdone from the last.
ESCALUS
Nine! Come hither to me, Master Froth. Master
Nine! Come to me, Master Froth. MasterFroth, I would not have you acquainted with
Froth, I would not have thought t
o acquaint you withtapsters: they will draw you, Master Froth, and you
Bar men: they will cheat you, Master Froth, and youwill hang them. Get you gone, and let me hear no
Be the reason they are hung. Get away from here, and don’t let me hear anymore of you.
More from you.
FROTH
I thank your worship. For mine own part, I never
I thank you, your honor. For my own part, I never come into any room in a tap-house, but I am drawn
Go into any room in a tavern, unless I am leadin.
In.
ESCALUS
Well, no more of it, Master Froth: farewell.
Well, no matter, Master Froth: farewell.
Exit FROTH
Come you hither to me, Master tapster. What's your
Come to me, Master bar man, What is yourname, Master tapster?
Name, Master bar man?
POMPEY
Pompey.
Pompey.
ESCALUS
What else?
What else?
POMPEY
Bum, sir.
ESCALUS
Troth, and your bum is the greatest thing about you;
Truth, and your bum is the greatest, and crudest, thing about you;so that in the beastliest sense you are Pompey the
So that in the lowest sense you are Pompey theGreat. Pompey, you are partly a bawd, Pompey,
Great. Pompey, you are partly a whore procurer, Pompey,howsoever you colour it in being a tapster, are you
However you hide it by being a bar man, don’t not? come, tell me true: it shall be the better for you.
You? Come on, tell me the truth: it shall be better for you.
POMPEY
Truly, sir, I am a poor fellow that would live.
Truly, sir, I am a poor fellow that wants to earn a living.
ESCALUS
How would you live, Pompey? by being a bawd? What
How do you want to earn a living, Pompey? By procuring whores? Whatdo you think of the trade, Pompey? is it a lawful trade?
Do you think of that occupation, Pompey? Is it a lawful occupation?
POMPEY
If the law would allow it, sir.
If only it was allowed by the law, sir.
ESCALUS
But the law will not allow it, Pompey; nor it shall
But it is not allowed by the law, Pompey; and it willnot be allowed in Vienna.
Not be allowed in Vienna.
POMPEY
Does your worship mean to geld and splay all the
Does you honor mean to neuter and spay all theyouth of the city?
Young men and women in the city?
ESCALUS
No, Pompey.
No, Pompey.
POMPEY
Truly, sir, in my poor opinion, they will to't then.
Truly then, sir, in my low opinion, they will continue then.If your worship will take order for the drabs and
If your honor would take care of the whores andthe knaves, you need not to fear the bawds.
Their clients, you wouldn’t need to worry about the procurers.
ESCALUS
There are pretty orders beginning, I can tell you:
There are considerable laws starting now, I can tell you:it is but heading and hanging.
The punishment will only be beheading and hanging.
POMPEY
If you head and hang all that offend that way but
If you behead and hang all those that commit this offensefor ten year together, you'll be glad to give out a
For only ten years, you’ll have to give out ancommission for more heads: if this law hold in
Order for more people: if this law remains inVienna ten year, I'll rent the fairest house in it
Vienna for ten years, I’ll rent the nicest house in itafter three-pence a bay: if you live to see this
At the rate of three-pennies a room: if you live to see this come to pass, say Pompey told you so.
Happen, say Pompey told you so.
ESCALUS
Thank you, good Pompey; and, in requital of your
Thank you, good Pompeyl and in repayment for yourprophecy, hark you: I advise you, let me not find
Prophecy, listen: I advise, you, don’t let me findyou before me again upon any complaint whatsoever;
You in front of me again for any complaint whatsoever;no, not for dwelling where you do: if I do, Pompey,
Not, not for living where you do: if I do, Pompey,I shall beat you to your tent, and prove a shrewd
I shall beat you to your home, and prove to be a meanCaesar to you; in plain dealing, Pompey, I shall
Caesar to your Pompey, as Caesar defeated Pompey the Great in battle; to put it plainly, Pompey, I willhave you whipt: so, for this time, Pompey, fare you well.
Have you whipped: so, for now, Pompey, fare you well.
POMPEY
I thank your worship for your good counsel:
I thank your honor for you good advice:
Aside
but I shall follow it as the flesh and fortune shall
but I will follow it as my body and opportinuty willbetter determine.
Dictate.Whip me? No, no; let carman whip his jade:
Whip me? No, no let a cart driver whip his nag:The valiant heart is not whipt out of his trade.
The courageous heart is not whipped out of his occupation.
Exit
ESCALUS
Come hither to me, Master Elbow; come hither, Master
Come to me, Master Elbow; come here, Masterconstable. How long have you been in this place of constable?
Constable. How long have you been in this position of constable?
ELBOW
Seven year and a half, sir.
Seven and a half years, sir.
ESCALUS
I thought, by your readiness in the office, you had
I thought, by your eagerness in your work, that you hadcontinued in it some time. You say, seven years together?
Held the position for some time. You say, seven years all together?
ELBOW
And a half, sir.
And a half, sir.
ESCALUS
Alas, it hath been great pains to you. They do you
Sadly, it’s been great trouble for you. They do youwrong to put you so oft upon 't: are there not men
Wrong to put you to work for so long: are there not menin your ward sufficient to serve it?
In your district competent enough to work?
ELBOW
Faith, sir, few of any wit in such matters: as they
By heaven, sir, few with any intelligence of these matters: as theyare chosen, they are glad to choose me for them; I
Are chosen, they are glad for me to take their place; Ido it for some piece of money, and go through with
Do it in exchange for a bit of money, and go through withall.
Everything.
ESCALUS
Look you bring me in the names of some six or seven,
Well, bring me the names of about six or seven others,the most sufficient of your parish.
The most competent in your district.
ELBOW
To your worship's house, sir?
To your honor’s house, sir?
ESCALUS
To my house. Fare you well.
To my house. Farewell.
Exit ELBOW
What's o'clock, think you?
What time do you think it is?
JUSTICE
Eleven, sir.
Eleven, sir.
ESCALUS
I pray you home to dinner with me.
I invite you home for dinner with me.
JUSTICE
I humbly thank you.
Humbly, I thank you.
ESCALUS
It grieves me for the death of Claudio;
It pains me that we will execute Claudio;But there's no remedy.
But there’s nothing to be do
ne.
JUSTICE
Lord Angelo is severe.
Lord Angelo is harsh.
ESCALUS
It is but needful:
It’s still necessary:Mercy is not itself, that oft looks so;
What looks like mercy isn’t always;Pardon is still the nurse of second woe:
Since pardoning may actually encourage a second offence:But yet,--poor Claudio! There is no remedy.
But still,--poor Claudio! There is nothing to be doneCome, sir.
Come on, sir.
Exeunt
Enter Provost and a Servant
SERVANT
He's hearing of a cause; he will come straight
He’s listening to a case; he will come right outI'll tell him of you.
I’ll tell him you’re here.
PROVOST
Pray you, do.
Please do.
Exit SERVANT
I'll know
I’ll knowHis pleasure; may be he will relent. Alas,His intention; perhaps he will change his mind. Sadly,
He hath but as offended in a dream!
Claudio has only done wrong like he was in a dream!All sects, all ages smack of this vice; and he
All types of people, of all ages have committed this offence; and heTo die for't!
Is to die for it!
Enter ANGELO
ANGELO
Now, what's the matter. Provost?
Now, what’s the wrong, Provost?
PROVOST
Is it your will Claudio shall die tomorrow?
Do you want Claudio to die tomorrow?