The Complete Works of William Shakespeare In Plain and Simple English (Translated)
Page 272
Who know of your purpose in coming here?
ISABELLA
One that I would were here, Friar Lodowick.
Someone I wish were here, Friar Lodowick.
DUKE VINCENTIO
A ghostly father, belike. Who knows that Lodowick?
A holy father, presumably. Who knows this Lodowick?
LUCIO
My lord, I know him; 'tis a meddling friar;
My lord, I know him; he’s a meddling friar;I do not like the man: had he been lay, my lord
I don’t like the man: if he hadn’t been a clergyman, my lordFor certain words he spake against your grace
For certain words he spoke against your graceIn your retirement, I had swinged him soundly.
In your absence, I would have punched him soundly.
DUKE VINCENTIO
Words against me? this is a good friar, belike!
Words against me? This is a good friar, presumably!And to set on this wretched woman here
And to set this terrible woman here upAgainst our substitute! Let this friar be found.
Against my replacement! Find this friar.
LUCIO
But yesternight, my lord, she and that friar,
But last night, my lord, she and that friair,I saw them at the prison: a saucy friar,
I saw them at the prison: a disrespectful friar,A very scurvy fellow.
A very despicable fellow.
FRIAR PETER
Blessed be your royal grace!
Bless you, your royal grace!I have stood by, my lord, and I have heard
I have stood aside, my lord, and I have heardYour royal ear abused. First, hath this woman
Your royal ear mislead. First, this woman hasMost wrongfully accused your substitute,
Most wrongfully accused your substitute,Who is as free from touch or soil with her
Who is as innocent these from moral accusation from herAs she from one ungot.
As she is from an unborn baby.
DUKE VINCENTIO
We did believe no less.
That is exactly what we thought.Know you that Friar Lodowick that she speaks of?
Do you know that Friar Lodowick that she speaks of?
FRIAR PETER
I know him for a man divine and holy;
I know him as a man who is divine and holy;Not scurvy, nor a temporary meddler,
Not despicable, nor a meddler in mundane affairs,As he's reported by this gentleman;
As he’s claimed to be by this gentleman;And, on my trust, a man that never yet
And, I promise, a man that has never,Did, as he vouches, misreport your grace.
As he claims, insult your grace.
LUCIO
My lord, most villanously; believe it.
My lord, he did most maliciously; believe me.
FRIAR PETER
Well, he in time may come to clear himself;
Well, in a little while he make come to clear his name;But at this instant he is sick my lord,
But at this moment he is sick my lord,Of a strange fever. Upon his mere request,
With some unknown fever. On his personal request,Being come to knowledge that there was complaint
Having discovered that there was a complaintIntended 'gainst Lord Angelo, came I hither,
Planned against Lord Angelo, I came here,To speak, as from his mouth, what he doth know
To speak for him, about what he knows Is true and false; and what he with his oath
To be true and false; and about what he with is holy oathAnd all probation will make up full clear,
And all of the proof will make absolutely clear,Whensoever he's convented. First, for this woman.
Whenever he’s summoned to speak. Firstly, about this woman.To justify this worthy nobleman,
To vindicate this worthy nobleman,So vulgarly and personally accused,
So crassly and personally accusedHer shall you hear disproved to her eyes,
You will hear her disproved to her eyes,Till she herself confess it.
Until she confesses to it herself.
DUKE VINCENTIO
Good friar, let's hear it.
Good friar, let’s hear what you have to say.
ISABELLA is carried off guarded; and MARIANA comes forward
Do you not smile at this, Lord Angelo?
Are you not smiling at this, Lord Angelo?O heaven, the vanity of wretched fools!
By God, the arrogance of worthless fools!Give us some seats. Come, cousin Angelo;
Give us some seats. Come on, my good friend Angelo;In this I'll be impartial; be you judge
In this I’ll be neutral; you be the judgeOf your own cause. Is this the witness, friar?
Of your own problem. Is this the witness, friar?First, let her show her face, and after speak.
First, let her show her face, and after that let’s hear her speak.
MARIANA
Pardon, my lord; I will not show my face
I’m sorry, my lord; I will not show my faceUntil my husband bid me.
Until my husband tells me to.
DUKE VINCENTIO
What, are you married?
What, are you married?
MARIANA
No, my lord.
No, my lord.
DUKE VINCENTIO
Are you a maid?
Are you a virgin?
MARIANA
No, my lord.
No, my lord.
DUKE VINCENTIO
A widow, then?
A widow, then?
MARIANA
Neither, my lord.
Not that either, my lord.
DUKE VINCENTIO
Why, you are nothing then: neither maid, widow, nor wife?
Well, you are nothing then if you are not a virgin, a widow, or a wife?
LUCIO
My lord, she may be a punk; for many of them are
My lord, she may be a whore; for many of them areneither maid, widow, nor wife.
Neither a virgin, a window or a wife.
DUKE VINCENTIO
Silence that fellow: I would he had some cause
Silence that man: I wish he had some caseTo prattle for himself.
To defend for himself.
LUCIO
Well, my lord.
Well, my lord.
MARIANA
My lord; I do confess I ne'er was married;
My lord; I do admit that I was never married;And I confess besides I am no maid:
And I admit as well that I am not a virgin:I have known my husband; yet my husband
I have slept with my husband; but my husbandKnows not that ever he knew me.
Did not know it was me.
LUCIO
He was drunk then, my lord: it can be no better.
He was drunk then, my lord: it can’t be anything else.
DUKE VINCENTIO
For the benefit of silence, would thou wert so too!
To keep you quite, I wish you were drunk too!
LUCIO
Well, my lord.
Well, my lord.
DUKE VINCENTIO
This is no witness for Lord Angelo.
This is not a witness for Lord Angelo’s case.
MARIANA
Now I come to't my lord
Now I’m getting to the point my lord,She that accuses him of fornication,
The woman who accuses him of having sex,In self-same manner doth accuse my husband,
Is at the same time accusing my husband,And charges him my lord, with such a time
And accuses him, my lord, of committing the crime at a certain timeWhen I'll depose I had him in mine arms
When I can prove that I had him in mine armsWith all the effect of love.
Making love.
ANGELO
Charges she more than me?
Is she accusing more men than just me?
MARIANA
Not that I know.
Not that I know of.
DUKE VINC
ENTIO
No? you say your husband.
No? you said your husband.
MARIANA
Why, just, my lord, and that is Angelo,
Well, yes, my lord, and that is Angelo,
Who thinks he knows that he ne'er knew my body,
Who incorrectly believes that he never had sex with me,But knows he thinks that he knows Isabel's.
But instead mistakenly believes that he was with Isabel.
ANGELO
This is a strange abuse. Let's see thy face.
This is a strange accusation. Let us see your face.
MARIANA
My husband bids me; now I will unmask.
My husband has asked me; now I will show my face.
Unveiling
This is that face, thou cruel Angelo,
This is the face, you cruel man Angelo,Which once thou sworest was worth the looking on;
That you once swore was worth looking at;This is the hand which, with a vow'd contract,
This is the hand that, with a promise of marriage,Was fast belock'd in thine; this is the body
Was locked steadfastly with yours; this is the bodyThat took away the match from Isabel,
That during that tryst stood in place of Isabel,And did supply thee at thy garden-house
And fulfilled your desire at your garden-houseIn her imagined person.
Pretending to be her.
DUKE VINCENTIO
Know you this woman?
Do you know this woman?
LUCIO
Carnally, she says.
Sexually, she claims.
DUKE VINCENTIO
Sirrah, no more!
Man, don’t speak!
LUCIO
Enough, my lord.
Enough, my lord.
ANGELO
My lord, I must confess I know this woman:
My lord, I must admit that I do know this woman:And five years since there was some speech of marriage
And five years ago there was talk of marriageBetwixt myself and her; which was broke off,
Between myself and her; which was broken off,Partly for that her promised proportions
Partly because her promised dowryCame short of composition, but in chief
Was less than was promised, but primarilyFor that her reputation was disvalued
Because her reputation was discreditedIn levity: since which time of five years
Because of sexual impurity: since that time five years agoI never spake with her, saw her, nor heard from her,
I have never spoken with her, saw her, or heard from herUpon my faith and honour.
I swear on my loyalty and honor.
MARIANA
Noble prince,
Noble duke,As there comes light from heaven and words from breath,
Just as light comes from the sky and words come from our mouths,As there is sense in truth and truth in virtue,
Just as there is reasonableness in truth and honesty in virtue,I am affianced this man's wife as strongly
I was engaged to be this man’s wife as certainlyAs words could make up vows: and, my good lord,
As words are part of vows: and, my good lord,But Tuesday night last gone in's garden-house
Just last Tuesday night in his garden-houseHe knew me as a wife. As this is true,
He made love to me as his wife. And this is the truth,Let me in safety raise me from my knees
Let me stand up from kneelingOr else for ever be confixed here,
Or else forever be fixed in this spotA marble monument!
Like a marble statue!
ANGELO
I did but smile till now:
I only smiled at these silly accusations until now:Now, good my lord, give me the scope of justice
Now, my good lord, allow me the power of justiceMy patience here is touch'd. I do perceive
My patience is growing thin, I believeThese poor informal women are no more
These poor crazy women are no moreBut instruments of some more mightier member
Than tools of some greater memberThat sets them on: let me have way, my lord,
Of the plot that put them up to this: let me have the right, my lord,To find this practise out.
To uncover this conspiracy.
DUKE VINCENTIO
Ay, with my heart
Yes, whole heartedly,And punish them to your height of pleasure.
And punish them as much as you want.Thou foolish friar, and thou pernicious woman,
That foolish friar, and this malicious woman,Compact with her that's gone, think'st thou thy oaths,
Conspiring with the one who was taken away, think about your oaths,Though they would swear down each particular saint,
Even though they would swear to each and every saint,Were testimonies against his worth and credit
That they were testimonies against your significance and credibilityThat's seal'd in approbation? You, Lord Escalus,
As exact evidence? You, Lord Escalus,Sit with my cousin; lend him your kind pains
Sit with my good friend; lend him a handTo find out this abuse, whence 'tis derived.
In discovering these allegations, and where they originated.There is another friar that set them on;
There is this other friar that set them up to this;Let him be sent for.
Send for him.
FRIAR PETER
Would he were here, my lord! for he indeed
I wish her were here, my lord! Because he did indeedHath set the women on to this complaint:
Put these women up to this complaint:Your provost knows the place where he abides
Your provost knows the place where he livesAnd he may fetch him.
And he can go get him.
DUKE VINCENTIO
Go do it instantly.
Go do it right this minute.
Exit PROVOST
And you, my noble and well-warranted cousin,
And you, my noble and much-admired friend,Whom it concerns to hear this matter forth,
As it concerns you to hear this situation fully,Do with your injuries as seems you best,
Deal with your accusations as you see fit,In any chastisement: I for a while will leave you;
With any punishment: I will leave you for a while;But stir not you till you have well determined
But don’t move until you have passed judgmentUpon these slanderers.
On these slanderers.
ESCALUS
My lord, we'll do it throughly.
My lord, we will punish them thoroughly.
Exit DUKE
Signior Lucio, did not you say you knew that
Mister Lucio, didn’t you say that you knew thatFriar Lodowick to be a dishonest person?
Friar Lodowick was a dishonest person?
LUCIO
'Cucullus non facit monachum:' honest in nothing
‘The robes don’t make the monk:’ nothing is honest about himbut in his clothes; and one that hath spoke most
Except his clothes; and he has spoken mostvillanous speeches of the duke.
Malicious words about the duke.
ESCALUS
We shall entreat you to abide here till he come and
We ask you to stay here until he comes andenforce them against him: we shall find this friar a
Accuse him of his words: we will find this friar to be anotable fellow.
Noteworthy fellow.
LUCIO
As any in Vienna, on my word.
As notable as any in Vienna, I promise.
ESCALUS
Call that same Isabel here once again; I would speak with her.
Call that woman Isabel back here; I would like to speak to here.
Exit an Attendant
Pray you, my lord, give me leave to question; you
Please, my lord, allow me to question her; youshall see how I'll handle her.
Will she how I’ll deal with her.
LUCIO
Not better than he, by her own rep
ort.
No better than he did, as she claims.
ESCALUS
Say you?
What are you saying?
LUCIO
Marry, sir, I think, if you handled her privately,
By the Holy Virgin, sir, I think if you handled her privately,she would sooner confess: perchance, publicly,
She’d be more likely to confess: perhaps, publicly,she'll be ashamed.
She’ll be too ashamed.
ESCALUS
I will go darkly to work with her.
I well question her crypticly.
LUCIO
That's the way; for women are light at midnight.
That’s how to do it; women are more willing in the dark.
Re-enter Officers with ISABELLA; and PROVOST with the DUKE VINCENTIO in his friar's habit
ESCALUS
Come on, mistress: here's a gentlewoman denies all
Come here, mistress: there’s a lady here who denies allthat you have said.
That you have said.
LUCIO
My lord, here comes the rascal I spoke of; here with
My lord, here comes the scoundrel I mentioned; here withthe provost.
The provost.
ESCALUS
In very good time: speak not you to him till we
Just in time: don’t speak to him until wecall upon you.
Ask you to.
LUCIO
Mum.
Not a word.
ESCALUS
Come, sir: did you set these women on to slander
Tell me, sir: did you put these women up to slanderLord Angelo? they have confessed you did.
Lord Aneglo? They confessed that you did.
DUKE VINCENTIO
'Tis false.
That’s not true.
ESCALUS