The Demons We See

by Krista D. Ball

  Borro Abbey

  The remainder of the journey was uneventful, except for the knotted anxiety in the pit of Allegra’s guts every time they stopped at a waystation inn. At times, she couldn’t muster the courage to go inside, so Serafina or Martin would fetch her a plate of food and Stanton would remain by her side. She refused to use the outhouses without someone standing just beyond the doors, in case of trouble.

  It took an entire day before she could even step inside an inn’s front door. They’d planned to sleep the night there, but after two hours of gripping the edge of her bed, she woke Nadira and both women slept in the carriage. After that, they didn’t stop at any inns to sleep, and merely slept on the road.

  When they arrived at Borro, relief spread through Allegra. She was home. She was safe. Whatever she’d endured on the way here, she could recover from. The bruises were healing, the scrapes scabbing over, and, soon, her spirits would recover.

  Servants hurried out into the main courtyard of the abbey. Father Michael came a short time later, arms extended in greeting. “My dear Contessa! I am so pleased to see you.” He bowed hastily and then kissed her on both cheeks. He gripped her arms and said, “I have been praying for your safe arrival. We received your runner’s letter yesterday. Oh, my dear child. I have not slept a wink since. How are you doing? Shall I call for the apothecary? Do you require a healing stone? I’ll get you a hot restorative. Gertie! Gertie! Oh, where is that girl gone? There you are. The Contessa is in need of…” He motioned at her to order from the young maid.

  “Welcome back, Your Ladyship,” Gertie said with a curtsy.

  “I believe some hot food and a soft bed will do nicely,” Allegra said.

  “At once, Your Ladyship,” Gertie said. She curtsied again and rushed off in the direction of the lower kitchens.

  Allegra smiled back at Father Michael and said, “Thank you for the prayers.”

  Father Michael beamed at her. “You are always in my prayers, my child.”

  “I’m glad,” Allegra said. She meant it. Though she did not believe, there was comfort in knowing Father Michael did believe and he used his private time with the Lord Almighty to think of her.

  “Captain Rainier! Hello, Captain! Nice to see you again.” Father Michael gave Rainier’s hand a firm, enthusiastic shake. “We have the entire east wing set aside for your soldiers tonight. We shall organize the details better once you’ve all had the benefit of a good meal and some sleep.”

  “Thank you, Father,” Stanton said gravely. He was standing next to her, a protective presence through her ordeal.

  “I thought we were going to be put into the cottages?” Allegra asked through a yawn.

  “I feared the cottages were too unsecure, especially now with threats upon your person. Plus, I don’t believe you should be hiding in some rundown cottage in the corner of the estate. No, no, no! I will not stand for it. So I had everything moved. We will work out the details later.”

  Allegra blinked the sleep from her eyes. “Father…you moved my things?”

  “Your maids did,” he said. He clasped her hands and said, “Please don’t be angry with me for long. I would never forgive myself if anything happened to you while you were in my care. Please, you must believe I did this for your own safety.”

  “I’m not angry, but you didn’t have to do that.”

  “Nonsense! Nonsense! We’ll assign quarters later. Let the servants get your bags and we’ll bring you food. Nadira! Good to see you, my dear! Good to see you!”

  Allegra blurrily followed the abbey’s housekeeper up the stairs. She’d been assigned one of the ambassador suites; a gorgeous set of rooms meant for working, entertaining, and sleeping. She ignored all of the splendor and collapsed on the bed, removing nothing but her shoes.

  It was her bladder which first woke her in the morning. She was still in the same position as she last remembered, sleeping on her stomach with her arms under her pillow. Her clothes were rumpled and pulled, and she had sore spots from a night of seams, wood, and whalebone digging into her flesh.

  It was a long moment before the disorientation of waking in a strange room wore off. She pushed herself up off the bed and looked for a chamber pot. The full wooden throne was set up behind a decorative embroidered screen. Once the necessities were cared for, Allegra peeled out of her dusty pelisse and reached inside her dress’s tight front to pull out the wooden busk she’d forgotten to remove the night before. No wonder she was stiff and slightly light-headed.

  Allegra opened the double wooden doors of her bedchamber into her private drawing room. It was a richly decorated room. From there, there were three more doors. She opened one and discovered a small closet with an altar. The other was clearly designed for letter writing and business. She hated leaving her cottage, but she had to admit this was better suited than her cottage for work.

  With a good night’s sleep and, judging by the height of the sun, a good morning’s sleeping, too, she was more rational to make decisions about accommodations and safety.

  Allegra looked around the room for a few minutes before she found the bell for the maid. She pulled it and went back to exploring her new home. There was a personal balcony off the drawing room, with a small table and chairs, and various potted plants. It overlooked the mountain where the abbey was now a proper building as opposed to living rock. It was a safe location.

  Allegra’s hands shook as she thought about how close she’d come to being dragged off to the dark pits somewhere. It was an acute reminder of how much was personally at stake for her. Allegra tried to remind herself that she was doing this for the mages who couldn’t hide behind their rank and wealth, who didn’t have strong, capable men and women like the Consorts protecting her.

  She could do this.

  Soon, there was a knock at her door and maids and footmen bustled into her room. Nadira, bless her heart, bossed them all around as they carried in Allegra’s trunks. Nadira knew where everything went better than Allegra did, and she shooed her mistress away to organize the new abode in peace.

  Allegra changed into gray riding trousers; the ones with the leather strip sewed into the inseam. She tugged on her long boots and abandoned her corset in favor of a tight button-up shirt. Over that she pulled on a white tunic.

  “Nadira, how warm is it outside?” Allegra called from her bedchamber.

  Nadira didn’t answer. She simply walked into the room, thrust a long coat at Allegra.

  Allegra tugged on the brown leather coat. It skimmed the tops of her boots and possessed a long slit in the back. She tugged her hair out of its fashionable up-do and braided it on one side of her head.

  “Eat, Your Ladyship,” Nadira commanded.

  Allegra grabbed a roll from the tray of food set down on the table. “Don’t let them throw that out. I’ll eat when I’m back from my ride.”

  “Understood, Your Ladyship,” Nadira said.

  She sent word ahead, so her gray mare was saddled and ready for her when she arrived at the stables. She thanked the stable boy and swung herself up on the mount. It had been a few weeks since she’d rode, and time at the Cathedral was enough to drive any sane woman into a gibbering mess; she needed fresh air.

  So she rode. Further up the mountain’s slope was a clearing filled with alpine flowers and small ponds. The ponds were mostly gone this time of the year, and the flowers had faded, but the clearing was still the perfect place to regain her center.

  Allegra came out here to mediate a couple times a week. It helped her keep calm and to suppress all of her boiling rage at the injustice around her. Allegra sat down at her favorite rock and let her horse wander. The old mare didn’t like to wander anymore, so she didn’t have to worry about tying her up.

  She’d written several elementals amongst her acquaintance while at the Cathedral. They’d all been open agitators for change. All of them rallied for elemental rights and had been involved in various ways in the abolition movement.
They had varied methods and philosophies, but they all shared one common goal: the freedom of mages.

  In guarded language, she’d asked them to step forward as representatives of the mage movement. She couldn’t risk exposing herself, but she could help protect them while they did. Yes, it was hypocritical, but she was scared. She was so scared. She knew what the mines looked like. She saw drawings of sugar cane farms, of cocoa farms, of fish processing wharves...Was there anything untouched by the forced work of mages or those accused of witchcraft?

  She knew what happened there. She knew all too well and she would rather fall upon a sword or jump off a cliff than subject herself to that horror.

  Some letters had already arrived, with their polite refusals. They would be happy to write letters and speak about abolition, but some had managed to keep their magical talents hidden from the world. They weren’t even ready to expose themselves that far; asking them to publicly declare they were elementals? Well, she knew their answers before even writing, but she had to ask.

  So what did that leave her? Princes and empresses and kings who cared only about themselves. The aristocracy cared only about their lands. None of them would stand up for the helpless. Oh, sure, they would give lip service, but they would all stuff every single mage into a pit if it meant keeping their asses warm upon their thrones.

  “Contessa?” called out a masculine voice.

  Allegra turned to see Stanton walking across the field. She could see his horse was tethered to one of the shorter trees. She waved him over. When he was within speaking distance, she said, “I thought I was alone.”

  Stanton smiled down at her and said, “Nadira told on you.”

  “So you’ve enlisted the servants against me.”

  Stanton sat next to her on the rock. “Don’t be angry. I came to check on you and discovered you’d slipped out already.”

  “I needed to be alone,” she said.

  “Next time, tell me.” His words were gentle and she couldn’t hear even a hint of rebuke in them.

  “If I tell you, I won’t be alone.”

  Stanton chuckled. “I’m merely doing my job.”

  “I know.”

  Stanton let out a contented sigh. “It’s beautiful here.”

  “You should have seen it a couple months ago. This entire field is nothing but little flowers. All of the snow run off creates ponds all over the place. It’s paradise.”

  “Maybe I’ll still be around in the spring to see it.”

  She smiled at him. “Perhaps.”

  “Look, if having me around is awkward for you, I can ask Dodd or Lex, or even Martin. Or one of the women. Whatever you want.”

  “I think Lex would rather be with Dodd than with me.”

  “Do you have problems with him?”

  “No, nothing like that. I mean, I think Lex would much rather be with Dodd than anyone.”

  “Yeah, they’ve been friends since they were children. Thick as thieves those two.”

  “I was thinking more of something else between them,” Allegra said, stating what she was convinced was the obvious.

  “What? No. Lex and Dodd? No. You’re just misunderstanding the friendship.”

  Allegra shrugged. “I see what I see.”

  “And you see what you want to see.”

  “Oh, yes. I forgot. Fine ladies always see romance everywhere their eyes land.” She batted her eyelashes at him. “In a week, they’ll be talking about us.”

  “They already are,” Stanton said, nudging her with his shoulder.

  Allegra groaned. “I knew I gave up court for a reason.”

  Stanton gave her an appraising look. “Tired of the gowns, I see.”

  “Almighty save me, yes. If I had to wear one more uncomfortable outfit, I was going to run through the streets stark naked raving like a lunatic.”

  “I’d like to see that,” Stanton said in a low grumble.

  Allegra turned to look him in the eye. She debated several remarks, all of which her sense told her would greatly escalate the tension. He was handsome. There was no debating that. But there was a lot more at stake than turning away from an excellent jaw line and warm, dark eyes.

  So Allegra looked back down at her boots and said, in a voice a touch too hoarse for her liking, “I should be heading back. I have a lot of work to get started.”

  Stanton rose and offered Allegra his gloved hand. She took it and ignored the commentary of the lonelier parts of her brain. “Shall we ride out here every morning before breakfast?”

  “They don’t serve breakfast at the abbey. We still keep the strict country traditions of dinner at eleven sharp, followed by a simple supper of nineteen dishes a course at six in the evening.”

  Stanton made a disgusted face. “I suspect I’ll be rising with the servants starting tomorrow to liberate some morsels from the kitchen.”

  Allegra laughed heartily, both at the look of feigned horror at the meal schedule and of his earnestness of kitchen raiding. She had come up here to relax, but as she watched Stanton smiling down at her, pleased to have made her laugh, she realized she was going to have to be very careful around him.

  Chapter 15

  Lex straightened their jacket before taking long strides across the Contessa’s main reception room to her study, waving at Serafina and a newly-arrived Nathan who were seated at a small table and bickering quietly. Lex hadn’t been in this part of the abbey yet, as they were focused first on arranging the personal security and guard detail for the Contessa.

  Lex looked around the richly-appointed room that was divided into smaller working areas by way of strategic placement of furniture. Small writing desks were near the windows. The middle of the room was blocked by a square of sofas and end tables. At one end of the room, peeking out from behind a vibrant silk folding screen, was a long dining table. Nearby that, a mahogany sideboard was the home of several silver-domes, protecting the snacks and food underneath from both flies and hungry lieutenants who were still unused to the lack of breakfast in this backwater abbey.

  “You asked to see me, Your Ladyship?” Lex said as they walked into the room.

  “Yes. Please, close the door.”

  Lex obeyed and stood at attention awaiting orders. Lex felt things had been awkward since the incident in the barracks. Lex was disappointed by that, since the Contessa seemed easy with the situation, once she’d worked out her own confusion and embarrassment. But she’d been cold to Lex the last handful of days, and they couldn’t help worry that Allegra’s time to think had caused unpleasant feelings to settle where the easy smiles first existed.

  The Contessa was well dressed, but then she often was. She wore a blue dress with a gauzy neck wrap for modesty, as all fine ladies were required to wear by the unspoken rules of decorum. Of course, the Contessa’s gauze was so thin that her bosom was still quite visible. Lex stifled a snort thinking about how Rainier would appreciate the still visible heavy bosom, but only just.

  “Please sit,” the Contessa instructed, motioning at one of the embroidered chairs. Once again, Lex obeyed. “I sent for you for two reasons. First, I want to ensure that I have done nothing to offend you.”

  Lex narrowed their eyes. “I don’t understand, Your Excellency.”

  The Contessa licked her lips. “I am uncertain if I behaved appropriately when I discovered…I mean…” She drew in a breath and collected herself. “If I have done anything incorrect or improper towards you, please let me know so that I can correct the situation.”

  Lex smiled at that. “Your Excellency…”

  “Please, I’m not one for titles. If you will not call me Allegra, at least call me Contessa.”

  Lex inclined their head. “Contessa, I thought you were the one offended.”

  “Why? Oh, I’ve been distracted lately when I’ve been around you, but that has nothing to do with you. Well, it does, but it’s related to a particular task I’d like you to perform for me, if yo
u are up for a challenge.” She waved a hand. “But, first, I want to ensure I have done nothing to make you feel uncomfortable.”

  Lex’s lips curled a fraction. “Are we counting this conversation?” The Contessa’s eyes widened comically and Lex laughed. “No, you have been fine. I’m not a delicate flower, you know? I can handle a little adversity.”

  “Perhaps, but why should you have it from me?” The Contessa smiled. “Is ‘he’ still the appropriate word to use to describe you? Or do you prefer another term? I only used it as that’s how you were introduced to me. I ask because I heard Dodd call you ‘them’ a couple of times, but then ‘he’ and I was concerned I was not using the correct words. As I harp on people saying mages and not witches, I don’t wish to be a hypocrite towards others.”

  Lex was pleased by the question. “Thank you for asking. ‘He’ is fine. Dodd’s a different case because he’s known me since we were kids. I often refer to myself as ‘them’ or ‘they’ and so Dodd sometimes uses it. But I’ve asked the guys and the Captain to introduce me as ‘he’.”

  The Contessa nodded. “Thank you for clarifying.”

  “Thank you for asking.”

  It didn’t bother Lex being asked. In truth, they preferred people asking than just guessing. Lex’s own personal slider moved day to day, and they decided a couple of years ago that ‘he’ worked better for outsiders. Lex’s own thoughts could swing accordingly and in peace, and the outside world could remain consistent.

  “Now, I’d like to speak to you about a task.”

  “What is it?”

  “Do you know who Walter Cram is?”

  Lex whistled and leaned back in their seat. Chills spread through their body at the name.

  “I see you do.”

  Walter Cram wasn’t just a mage; he was an elementalist. He was considered the elementalist. He was wanted by every government, city-state, and local magistrate in most of Serna. He went into hiding years ago, occasionally popping up to stir up mage rebellions and even fought in a couple of skirmishes. He had a network of supporters and sympathizers who kept him so well hidden that no torturer nor spy could infiltrate. It was thought he was behind the latest string of collapsed mines along the Cartossa-Amadore border.