He Loves Lucy

by Susan Donovan

  “It’s great!” She wasted no time placing it on the second toe of her right foot Then she hugged Stephan tight, which made him feel amorous for the third time that day, which could have very well been a record.

  Lola ended the hug and spent a few moments admiring her newly festooned toe, then let her gaze return to Stephan’s. It really was a pity she didn’t have a pretty face, but he figured a man couldn’t have everything.

  “You know, Stephan, Lucy hasn’t shown up at the gym for at least a couple weeks.”

  Now they were getting somewhere-a little platinum apparently greased the skids. “Really now?”

  “I think she and Theo had a huge fight.”

  This was welcome news. “Do you think Lucy’s losing her momentum?” he asked.

  “Maybe. But I know Theo, and he doesn’t like quitters. He’ll do everything he can to convince her to come back.”

  “So you like the toe ring?” Stephan enjoyed watching the eager nod of her head and wondered just how much of this game Lola was cognizant of.

  “I love it!”

  “Why don’t you poke around a little at the gym and find out what you can about Lucy? You know, if she’s gone off her diet and has stopped exercising completely, stuff like that. Maybe we can leak it to the press-bad publicity is better than no publicity at all.”

  Lola gave him a little frown. “I don’t like Lucy much, but you really don’t like her, do you? I mean, you act like you hate Lucy Cunningham.”

  Stephan smiled. “Let’s just say she won’t be getting a raise this year.”

  “Whatever happened to the picture?” Buddy jogged along at Theo’s side, the sweat soaking through his T-shirt.

  “I sent it to myself registered mail that next morning, so it has the date on it. I’m waiting for the right time to show it to her.”

  “She’s still not coming to see you at the gym?”

  “No. And she won’t answer her any of her phones. She won’t return e-mails.”

  “I’m sorry, Theo.” Buddy shook his head. “That was a real nice picture, too.”

  Theo laughed. The picture was pretty stupid. But it was the best he could do at the time. At least it would get the point across, and he knew that someday Lucy would find the humor in it.

  At least he hoped.

  “Buddy, let me ask you something.”

  “Sure.”

  “Have you thought much about how you’ll feel if I get back into med school?”

  Buddy raised the hem of his shirt and swiped at his sweaty face, not answering right away. “I’ll be OK, Theo. I’m growing up. I want you to be happy. When’s your big test?”

  “Next Friday.” Theo patted his brother’s shoulder and knew they needed to wrap up their morning run. They’d gone through the Miami Springs residential neighborhood this morning instead of the track, because Lucy wasn’t joining them.

  “I miss her a lot,” Buddy said.

  “I miss her, too.”

  “You’ve got to get her back, Theo. She’s the nicest lady who’s ever loved you.”

  Buddy was right again. Lucy was the nicest lady who’d ever loved Theo. In fact, she was the most of everything of any woman Theo had ever met. And if he’d already lost her, he’d never stop kicking his own stupid ass.

  “Do you worry that you don’t have time to love her? Is that what’s making you so dumb about this?”

  Buddy’s question nearly knocked the wind out of him.

  “Is it because of me, Theo? Do I take up too much of your time?”

  “Oh God, Buddy. No.”

  “ ‘Cause I won’t be living with you forever, you know. I want my own apartment after I graduate, and I want to get a job and maybe even get married one day. I worry that you’ll just sit around being lonely.”

  Theo nudged his brother to turn left at Pinecrest so they could head back toward their place on DeLeon. “I won’t be doing much sitting around, Bud. I won’t even be doing much sleeping. Not for a lot of years.”

  “Yeah, but even busy people get lonely. I worry that you’ll be sad, wishing you still had Lucy. So you’d probably better get her back now.”

  Theo stopped running, and Buddy came to a halt in front of him. He looked at his amazing brother- someone who was determined to carve out a life for himself without a single guarantee of success-and wondered why he couldn’t be just as courageous.

  “You look surprised that I have these plans, Theo.”

  “Not surprised. Proud.”

  Buddy put his hands on his hips and smiled, his eyes squinting through his thick glasses. “I think Lucy makes you even happier than Jenna. Lucy loves you back. I don’t think Jenna did.”

  We Loves Lucy 233

  Theo gulped the air and stared at his brother. “You’re right, Bud. You’re right about everything.”

  Buddy gave Theo a friendly slap on his back, and the two jogged the few blocks back to their house in silence. As they stretched in the driveway, Norton padded across the grass to sit near them, cleaning himself. Occasionally he would glance in their direction.

  “I hope you don’t mind, but I’m taking Norton with me when I get my own place. But you and Lucy can visit.”

  Theo broke out in a huge smile. “You can count on it, Bud.”

  “It’s been two hours. Give the guy a break, Lucy.”

  Veronica slipped in Lucy’s office door and stood with her arms crossed over her chest, tapping her toe.

  “I don’t want to see him.”

  “He’s such a nice guy.”

  “Is there anything else? Or was this just a ‘Theo Redmond is still in the building’ update?”

  “He’s been hanging out in the lobby three days now.”

  Lucy chewed on the end of her pen, hearing and feeling her stomach rumble. She’d basically been starving herself the last few days, trying to make up for overdoing it the previous week. But she felt exhausted, shaky, and about as cranky as she’d been in ten months. “What’s he doing out there?”

  “Studying. He said his test is Friday. He said he took the whole week off to study.”

  Lucy cringed. And to sit around in the Sherrod amp; Thorns lobby. She was ashamed of herself-if Theo didn’t do well it would be all her fault. If he didn’t reach his dream it would be…

  His dream! Maybe he was here about the money! Maybe that’s all he wanted.

  “You can send him in,” Lucy said abruptly.

  Veronica let her head swivel around in surprise. “Huh?”

  “Send him in. Let’s get this over with.”

  Theo popped in a moment later and shut the door behind him. He sat down in one of the chairs in front of Lucy’s desk and threw a heavy-looking backpack on the other.

  As he glanced around her office, Lucy realized Theo had never before been here. She wondered if he liked the pale yellow walls and the combination of primitive and modern art. Then she reminded herself she didn’t care what he liked.

  He smiled at her. “How are you, Luce?”

  What kind of a greeting was that? Like she could answer that question truthfully!

  “Fine, thanks.”

  One of Theo’s eyes squinted and his smile grew a bit crooked.

  “And how are you, Theo?”

  ‘Tired and nervous about tomorrow. And I miss you, Cunningham.“

  Why did he have to be so direct? So… Theo?

  “I suppose you want to talk about the money.”

  He said nothing and didn’t move, and she took that as his way of letting on that he was embarrassed about it, but that’s exactly why he was here.

  “I’ve thought it over,” she went on, “and I think the equitable thing would be to have Ramona pay you for the seventy-two pounds, through last month, and then the rest should go to Tyson.”

  Theo still said nothing.

  “I know that’s not all the money you’d hoped to have for med school, but it’s still a lot.”

  Theo finally stopped staring at her, and he looked down at his
hands, the fingers spread wide over his knees. It was then Lucy noticed he wasn’t wearing his usual white Palm Club polo and the blue trainer shorts. He was wearing the white linen slacks he’d worn to the victory dance in Tampa, with a dusky blue cotton button-down. And the way he sat, with his head bent and his strong shoulders sloped, he looked tired. Weighted down.

  She remembered how she’d summed him up when they’d first met. She thought he was a pretty-boy jock with an empty head and not a care in the world. She’d been so unfair to him. And completely wrong.

  Maybe she was wrong again.

  “Theo-”

  He cut her off when he raised his head and shot her a look of fierce anger and hurt. That face was too beautiful and kind to carry the force of those emotions. It surprised her.

  “I only meant-” Her phone rang. She could see by the numbers on the display that it was Gia, calling from her cell.

  “You wanna go to lunch?”

  Lucy held the phone to her ear while she watched Theo begin to seethe.

  “Uh, well-”

  “Yes? No? What’s the story with you, ducal You busy or what?”

  “Gia, I’m sorry, but I can’t today. I’m just kind of-” Her second line began flashing, and this time it was Mary Fran’s cell.

  Lucy abruptly ended the call with Gia and answered her sister.

  “I’ve reached the end of my rope. I’m going to talk to an attorney on Friday, and I’m really leaving this time.” Mary Fran said all this without any kind of greeting.

  Theo continued to fume. The man had a temper! And he seemed perfectly content just to sit there in the chair and boil over until Lucy broke down and said something to him.

  “My flight gets in at ten thirty Saturday morning. I’m bringing all the kids.”

  “Whaa-?”

  “Shoot! Hold on just a second.” Mary Fran put her hand over the mouthpiece and screamed, “Don’t you dare put that in your sister’s nose!” Then she was back. “I have to go. Ten thirty, don’t forget.”

  “Mary Fran, this really isn’t a good time for me.”

  “Dan told me all about it. We’ll talk. I promise. Love you.”

  Click.

  Theo picked up his backpack and held it in his lap. He looked like he was about ready to produce a few choice words to go along with the seething just as Lucy’s phone rang again.

  Perfect. Her mother.

  “I’m so sorry, Theo. Just a second.” She picked up the phone. “Hi, Mom.”

  “I hope I am not disturbing you, but Gia just called me to say you’re in a funk.”

  That was quick.

  “I’m worried about you.”

  “I’m fine, Mom.”

  “That’s not what Dan told me. According to him, you haven’t been fine for a decade. Why didn’t you come to me about this?”

  Theo was making moves like he was going to stand up and leave. She wasn’t sure if that was a good thing or a bad thing. She mouthed to him, I’ll just be a minute.

  “Are you listening to me, Lucy?”

  “I never really envisioned having this conversation over the phone, Mother.”

  “Well, I’d say the phone is better than never at all. Let me get your father on the other extension. Bill!”

  Oh, Jesus.

  Theo stood up. “We’ve managed to really screw this up, haven’t we, Lucy?”

  “Wait. Just wait a-”

  “Hello. This is Bill Cunningham.” Her father was on the line.

  “Bill, for God’s sake, this is Lucy, not a telemar-keter. We are discussing that thing I told you about.”

  “Which thing? You tell me about a lot of things in the course of a day, Maggie.”

  “Lucy’s thing. Her feelings about what happened at Pitt State.”

  “Oh, sure. Gotcha.” Lucy’s father cleared his throat. “Now Lucy, you didn’t have to pretend with us. You could have told us that it hurt like the devil. You didn’t need to protect us.”

  Theo tossed the backpack onto his shoulder and turned to go. Lucy stood up behind her desk. “Wait?‘ she whispered.

  “No, I think we should talk about this now,” her mother said, her voice getting wobbly. “You really shouldn’t have been worried about anyone but yourself! We could have found help for you right then, before things got so out of control. Maybe you wouldn’t have gotten so heavy.”

  Lucy rolled her eyes, then saw that Theo thought the eye rolling was for him. Not you, she mouthed.

  “Maggie?”

  “Yes, Bill?”

  “Hang up the phone so I can talk to Lucy alone.”

  “Do you really think that’s a-”

  “Just hang up the damn telephone so I can speak with my daughter.”

  Click.

  “Hi, pumpkin. How are you doin‘?”

  Theo’s hand was on the doorknob.

  “Quite crappy at the moment, Dad.”

  “Does this have to do with that trainer of yours? I noticed at the party how you look at him. Lucy, I don’t want to see you hurt. Are you sure he’s the right kind of man for you?”

  Her dad noticed the way she looked at Theo? He noticed anything?

  “You know, sweetheart, we love you for being you, not because you’re getting all gussied up on TV. You don’t have to do any of this.”

  Theo shook his head, exasperated.

  “I know I don’t have to, Daddy. But I want to.”

  “Then do it, but only if it makes you happy. No more sadness, pumpkin.”

  “Thanks, Dad.”

  “And your mother’s right. You didn’t have to try to spare us anything, Lucy. What happened to you back in school was not your fault. You did nothing wrong, well, except for having sex out of wedlock, but I’m not an idiot. I know all my children have done that.”

  “I can see you don’t have time for this. See ya, Lucy,” Theo opened the door.

  “Dad-?”

  “So don’t ever hold back from us again. You got something to say-you just come right out and say it. Are we clear on that?”

  Lucy heard a rush of air on the line and knew that her mother had picked up. “I’m sorry, but I just couldn’t stand it! Are you all right, Lucy?”

  “I’m good, Mom. Dad helped me out a lot.”

  There was a pause. “He did?”

  “Yes. And now I have to get back to work.” Theo was out the door. “Thanks for the call, Mom. And thanks for the chat, Dad. I love you both.”

  “We love you,” her mother said.

  “Don’t be a stranger,” her father said.

  She hung up the phone and tried to reach Theo before he got in the elevator, but she was a second too late. So she cupped her mouth in her hands and yelled into the closed doors, “Good luck on your test tomorrow!”

  And Lucy turned around thinking to herself how funny it was that a person can spend an entire decade making a huge unscalable mountain out of something that can be taken care of in a five-minute phone call.

  It started with a few postings on the TheoandLucy.net message board. In between ongoing commentary on the nearly nude beaded party dress Lucy had worn the previous month and the pros and cons of the low-carb lifestyle-a subject that got so nasty and personal that it required intervention by the site moderator-a few fans began to speculate about what had happened to Theo.

  Some claimed the flu to which he’d allegedly succumbed was really something much more serious, such as mad cow disease or meningitis. One fan claimed to have seen Theo hospitalized. Then another came up ‘ with the theory that Lucy and Theo had a terrible argument and had broken up and that Lucy was now engaged to marry Tyson. Yet another speculated that Theo couldn’t handle Lucy’s celebrity and jealousy had driven him underground.

  But when Theo opened the Sunday Miami Herald one morning to see their gossip column chock-full of the same drivel, he nearly spit out his coffee. The subject of Theo and Lucy was more than just one item among many-it was the entire column, and it featured three photographs and quotes
from, of all people, Lola DiPaolo and Stephan Sherrod.

  “They can’t stand the sight of each other anymore,” was one of the statements attributed to Lola. And Stephan was quoted as saying, “As much as I hate to admit this, it looks like Lucy has lost her commitment to this project. It’s sad, really. She was starting to come out of her shell.”

  Then Theo carefully examined the photos the newspaper had selected and felt the bile start to rise in his throat. He hated that what he and Lucy may or may not be feeling for each other was up for public commentary. He hated that he’d put himself in this situation. He hated the thought of how hurt Lucy would be when she saw this.

  The first photo was of Lucy’s initial TV weigh-in, and Theo was shocked at her appearance. He’d not forgotten where they’d started, but the sight of Lucy at that size no longer registered in his brain. It didn’t even look like her. The second photo showed them running at the high school track back in May. The third photo showed them dancing at the Mandarin, Lucy pressing her cheek against his chest in the seconds before she raised her face to him. Theo was relieved to see the photographer somehow missed the actual kiss when his eyes strayed to the photo caption. It read: Who’s in training now?

  Theo studied that photo, and his skin began to tingle in awareness. Anyone looking at that picture would recognize his bliss. His eyes were closed, his chin rested on her hair, and a goofy smile had spread across his face. His arms held her with a tenderness so sweet it shocked him.

  And the way Lucy pressed up against him, her elegant neck turned so that she could snuggle into his shoulder…

  He and Lucy looked like lovers in that picture. Theo supposed the whole world could see it, just as he did right then. And maybe it was that simple. They were lovers, and it was time to dive headfirst into the concept. It is what it is, as Tyson would say.

  “What’cha reading, Theo?” Buddy opened the sliding glass doors and joined him at the back porch table.

  ‘The paper.“

  “You got the baseball standings?”

  “Here you go.” Theo tried to keep his face hidden so Buddy wouldn’t see how upset he was.

  “What are you upset about?”

  Theo laughed. “Nothing. Just still real tired from the test.”