Tell It to My Heart

by Deidra Scott

  Taking a deep breath, she unhitched her buggy out in the barn and then made her way to Granny’s house. Evening was quickly closing in and Mandy wanted a few minutes to unwind before heading off to bed.

  Opening the front door, she called out, “Granny, I’m home!”

  “Mandy...” A weak voice called out, “Mandy...help me.”

  Suddenly frightened, Mandy hurried into the sitting room where she found her Granny lying flat on her side in the overturned rocking chair. Her head was bleeding and her eyes looked lifeless.

  “Granny, oh, Granny!” Mandy fell to her knees and reached out, unsure of what to do next.

  “Get...help...” Granny whispered.

  Pulling herself to her feet, Mandy was unsure who she should call. Running to the table, she found Dr. Matt’s phone number and hurried out to the phone shanty at the edge of the lane.

  Dr. Matt was at the house within ten minutes. Mandy watched as he jumped out of his shiny truck and race toward the front door.

  “She’s in here,” Mandy announced, directing him to the sitting room where Granny still lay in a heap on the floor, “I was afraid to move her.”

  Dr. Matt squatted down on the floor, “Mrs. Hostetler, where are you hurt?” Reaching out, he felt for broken bones.

  “Nothing seems to be broken,” he informed Mandy, “Can you help me move her to her bed?”

  With a moan from Granny, the doctor scooped her up in his arms like a newborn child, following Mandy as she led him to the bedroom.

  Watching him lay Granny down on the bed, Mandy was hit by the realization that, on her own, there was no way she could have moved her grandmother.

  “Get her a glass of water,” Dr. Matt instructed and Mandy hurried to do as he asked.

  “Can you tell us what happened?” The doctor questioned.

  After taking a drink of water, Granny whispered, “Ach, it happened so suddenly! I was sitting in my chair asleep, and the crazy thing turned right over. Next thing I knew, I was on the floor and I couldn’t get up.”

  “How long were you lying there?”

  “Well, let’s see...” She tried to think, “I fell right after Mandy left Friday night.”

  “You’ve been on the floor with no food or water for this long?” Letting out a whistle, the doctor exclaimed, “I’m surprised you’re still alive.”

  Taking a deep breath, Granny whispered, “I suppose the gut Lord isn’t done with me yet.”

  Turning to Mandy, Dr. Matt announced, “We need to get her to the hospital. I’ll call an ambulance.”

  “No...no hospital!” Granny exclaimed, trying to raise her feeble voice, “I want to stay right here.”

  Glancing at Mandy, Dr. Matt searched her face for an opinion. Mandy shrugged her shoulders and whispered, “She’s always hated hospitals. She’s said she’d rather die at home than have to stay at one of those places.”

  Dr. Matt started to protest but then slowly nodded his head, “I can see how she would feel that way. If I lived here, I would want to be home, too.”

  Raising his voice, he announced, “All right, but I’ll have to stay here with you. I’m not leaving you alone until I see that you’re going to be okay. I’ll run by my office and get some supplies so that I can stitch up that place on your forehead and get some IV fluids going.”

  “Danki,” Mandy whispered softly, “Danki so much.”

  Within the next hour, Dr. Matt had the gash in Granny’s head stitched up and fluids going into her body thanks to an IV. He sat by the old woman’s side until she finally fell asleep.

  Watching him carefully, Mandy could see that he was exhausted as well. He reached up to rub his eyes and yawn.

  “Would you like to lay down somewhere and take a nap?” Mandy questioned.

  The doctor shook his head slowly, “I don’t want to sleep until I makes sure she’s going to be okay.”

  “Would you like some coffee?”

  Dr. Matt nodded, “Coffee would be nice.”

  Following her into the kitchen, the doctor sat down in one of the wooden chairs and let out a deep breath. Reaching up to rub his eyes, he whispered, “Wake me when the coffee’s finished.”

  Mandy busied herself preparing the hot drink. Turning around with a cup in hand, she found the doctor with his head resting against the table top, sound asleep. He looked so sweet, so childlike, that Mandy felt a strange tugging at her heart – a feeling she’d never experienced before.

  “Dr...” Mandy placed the cup in front of him and placed a gentle hand on his shoulder, “Doctor...your coffee is ready.”

  Sitting up straight and rubbing his eyes, the doctor exclaimed, “Wow, sorry...how long have I been asleep?”

  “About ten minutes,” Mandy replied with a laugh, “Here,” she indicated to his cup and then passed him a cinnamon roll, “Do you have anything against cinnamon rolls?”

  He smirked and shook his head, “No, I actually like those a lot, too. Apple is really the only thing I don’t like...and yours wasn’t that bad, really....I just wanted to irritate you.”

  Mandy couldn’t decide if she’d rather slap him or hug him for that admission.

  “Doctor...”

  “Please,” he held up his hand as he took a sip of his coffee, “Don’t call me doctor anymore. Matt or Matthew is fine.”

  Mandy sat back in her seat and slowly nodded her head, “All right, Matt.”

  Taking a bite of her cinnamon roll, Matt closed his eyes and whispered, “This tastes just like my mamm’s.”

  The words took Mandy by surprise. Sitting up straighter, she exclaimed, “What did you just say?”

  Matt smirked and swallowed, “Well, that slipped out...but it was almost worth it to see your face.” Wiping his mouth on a napkin, he confessed, “I haven’t always lived in the English world.”

  Mandy could feel her eyes growing as large as saucers, “You left?”

  “Technically no...more like was kidnapped.” Matt sighed, “When I was twelve, my mamm died. My dad went a little crazy after that. There were three of us kids and he packed us all up and moved us to the city. He was done being Amish, he said. Within a few months, he was a heavy alcoholic and moved us in with a girlfriend who liked my two sisters, but could hardly stand me.” Shaking his head, Matt said, “The Englisch world was nothing like life in the Amish community.”

  “Ach,” Mandy closed her eyes and leaned her forehead against the palm of her hand, “What happened?”

  Matt shrugged, “What you see now. I made it my mission in life to become a doctor so that I could help people like my mom. My dad drank himself to death. My sisters fell right into the Englischer world and are now married, successful business women. They forgot everything about this world...but I never could.”

  “You miss being Amish, don’t you?”

  Matt slowly nodded, “Every day, I’ve wished that I could just be back home...but there’s no way now.”

  “Why not?”

  Matt shook his head, “I’m not good Amish material. I can’t see myself farming with a happy wife and a dozen kids. Really, Mandy, can you see that?”

  Mandy sighed deeply and tried to picture any of the Amish women she knew being happy with someone like Matt.

  “I’d better go check on your grandma,” he announced, scooting his cup back, “Danki for the food.”

  Chapter Five

  With each day that passed, Granny slowly improved. By Wednesday, Matt felt safe leaving to go back to his work at the hospital and regular house calls among the Amish community. While Mandy was glad that her grandmother was doing better, it made her sad to see Matt gone.

  During Matt’s stay, Mandy had begun to enjoy his company. Unlike the other Amish men she had known, he wasn’t desperate for her attention and wasn’t trying to make her become his wife. They had enjoyed quality time together, sharing stories of their experiences growing up in the Amish community.

  Matt slowly explained sadder details about his time in the Englischer world.
He told Mandy how confusing it had been to start public school along with the bullies that he had encountered. It was obvious that Matt had never fit in the regular world and now he seemed convinced that he could never fit in the Amish world either.

  Mandy felt her heart softening so much. As much as she hated to admit it, she felt love growing for this handsome young doctor. She wanted to tell Matt how she felt, she wanted to let him know that she would welcome him into their community, but her pride kept her from opening her mouth. Ach, she had spent her entire life vowing that she would never care about a man! The idea of admitting she had been wrong was more than she could do.

  By the next week, Granny was able to get up and move around with very little pain. She was off of the IV fluids and was able to eat and drink whatever she wanted.

  Thursday afternoon, Matt stopped by for his daily visit. Although Mandy tried to hide her excitement, she felt a thrill in her heart.

  “You certainly do look better now!” Matt announced as he looked over Granny, “Mrs. Hostetler, you are one tough lady!”

  Although his words sounded happy, his voice seemed sad. Mandy instantly detected that he was unhappy about something.

  “I’ve got some surprising news...” Matt said, looking down at the top of his shoes, “I got an offer to go to Boston to work in a really great hospital. I had a hard time deciding, but I’m going to accept.”

  Mandy felt like the wind had been knocked right out of her chest. Staggering, she held onto the wall for support.

  “Ach, why?” Granny asked, “I thought you were happy here.”

  Matt gave a shrug, “Sometimes happiness is a double-edged sword. I need to leave.”

  Standing to his feet, he closed his medical bag, “I’m going to give my patients over to one of my associates at the hospital. Doctor Brown....you’ll like him.”

  Mandy felt herself blinking furiously, trying to hold back her tears.

  “It was nice to meet you, Mrs. Hostetler. It was gut to meet you too, Mandy.”

  And like that, he was gone. Mandy followed him to the front door, but she couldn’t force words to come out of her mouth.

  “I can’t believe it,” Mandy whispered, trying to gather her emotions, “I can’t believe he’s leaving.”

  “Why didn’t you stop him?!” Granny exclaimed, throwing her hands up in surprise and irritation.

  “How could I stop him?” Mandy retorted, “He’s determined to go.”

  Granny reached out and placed her weathered hand on Mandy’s shoulder, “Tell him how you feel! Dear girl, can’t you see...this is the man for you!”

  Mandy ripped away from her, her face growing hot with embarrassment, “I don’t know what you’re talking about.”

  “You love him! I can see it in your face every time he’s here!”

  Mandy jutted out her bottom jaw defiantly, “I will never love a man!” And with that, she stormed out of the room and to her bedroom.

  Mandy couldn’t sleep that night. She kept turning from side to side, her mind full of thoughts about Matt. Granny was right: She did love him. Mandy knew that it was true. The question was, was her love bigger than her pride? She didn’t think it could be. No matter how much Matt wanted to be a part of her world or how much she enjoyed being around him, she knew that she would sooner die than have to admit that everyone was right and that she could need another person.

  The next day, Mandy tried to work on driving posts for the chicken coop, but her mind was so full of frustration that she could do nothing right. She hit her thumb twice and dropped the fence post on her foot.

  “That’s it!” She finally exclaimed as she threw the fence post to the ground in disgust, “I’ve got to go to him!”

  Despite never needing a man in the past, Mandy realized that she truly did need one now. She needed Matt...and she wanted him.

  Now that she had made her decision, she could hardly wait. She hurried out to the barn and hitched up the wagon. Running into the house, she told Granny she had to go into town.

  “Where are you going, child?” Granny exclaimed, rousing from her rocking chair.

  “To see Matt!” Mandy announced, grabbing for her shawl, “You’re right Granny. I’ve got to talk to him.”

  In all the times that she had raced her buggy, Mandy had never gone any faster. By the time she reached town, sweat was pouring down her face. Remembering where Matt had pointed out his office, she stopped in front of it, breathing a sigh of relief when she saw his truck parked beside it.

  “Matt,” She called out, slinging the door open.

  Matt stood at the desk surrounded by cardboard boxes he was filling with papers from a drawer. When he heard her voice, he looked up in surprise, “Mandy! Is your granny all right?”

  Mandy nodded and bent over, trying to catch her breath.

  “Matt,” Mandy tried to speak around the pounding of her heart, “Oh, Matt, I don’t even know how to tell you this. Don’t go. Please, I know it’s crazy, but don’t go. We need you here...I need you here.”

  Matt seemed to be soaking in her words. He carefully laid a pile of papers in one of the boxes and stood up straight to look her in the eyes.

  “A lot of places need me,” he replied, “I’m a good doctor...and the hospital in Boston needs a good doctor.”

  Suddenly, Mandy found her eyes filling with tears that she struggled to contain, “I don’t mean that, Matt. I know that you’re a fine doctor, but that’s not what I need...I need you. Matt, I love you.”

  In an instant, Matt had crossed the distance between them. Gathering Mandy in his arms, he held her tightly against him as she sobbed into his shirt.

  “Are you serious?” He asked, pushing her back and propping her chin up so that he could look in her face, “Are you sure that you mean what you’re saying?”

  Mandy nodded against the tears, so anxious to be back at home in his embrace, “Please, don’t leave! I know you want to go to Boston...”

  “I don’t want to go to Boston,” he interrupted, “I don’t want to ever leave this place. As soon as I started practicing here, the urge to rejoin the Amish church was greater than ever. And knowing you....Mandy, you’ve nearly driven me crazy. Every time I was with you, I have wanted so desperately to love you, but I knew that you would never let me. I knew you were so determined to stay single that you wouldn’t think of being with me. Leaving was my way of escaping the sadness of knowing we could never be together!”

  Mandy shook her head, once again burying her black cap against his chest, “I could never be happy being single now!”

  “Neither could I,” he agreed, pulling her closer to him.

  Together they stood in the office, enjoying their new-found romance, both realizing that to love and be loved were the greatest of all things life had to offer.

  Prologue

  Mandy reached up to wipe a strand of hair out of her eyes, never taking her gaze off the ball. She held her bat above her shoulder and waited for it. As soon as the ball came her direction, she gave a quick swing of her arm, watching as the wooden bat sent it sailing far across the fields.

  “Yay for Mom!!!” The pitcher started yelling.

  Mandy laughed as a group of boys, her boys, started gathering around her.

  “I’ll never be as good as you are, Mamm!” One of the boys started to complain.

  Mandy laughed and reached up to give his straw hat a playful flip, “Now, now, you’ve just got to practice. And I have to get inside and finish up on supper before your daed gets home from work.”

  The boys hurried off to finish their chores while Mandy dusted some dirt off her skirt.

  “You’re a little too late on that one.” Matt’s voice spoke softly in her ear. Turning around, Mandy realized that he crept up behind her.

  Wrapping her arms around his neck, she looked up into his brown eyes. Over the past fifteen years, they had weathered a lot together.

  Shortly after they admitted their love for each other, Matt joined the A
mish church. Since doctors were so necessary, the Bishop agreed that he could keep his medical practice. Mandy and Matt had gotten married and now had six children of their own.

  The two of them lived together with Granny until she passed on, leaving them her house for their own. In Mandy’s spare time, she still ran a farm, baked goods, and did small carpentry jobs.

  “What are you thinking about?” Matt laughed at Mandy’s goofy smile.

  Mandy smirked and reached up to give him a kiss, “I was just thinking how glad I am that Granny was right about God having a man in store for me.”

  Matt smiled back at her. Together, they walked to the house where Mandy finished up on a delicious meal for her family to enjoy together.