by Lucy Monroe
She could not possibly know what her ready acceptance meant to him. The only people who had ever accepted him at face value his entire life had been his grandfather and his mother. Even the rest of his family defined him by his status as a bastard. His own aunt had felt compelled to warn Thea just what she was getting when she became entangled with him.
He wanted to kiss the stubborn, delicious woman beside him until she melted against him and forgot what she was angry about. He needed to show her how much her belief in him mattered. He had given up on tender feelings after the debacle of his courtship of Deirdre, but he didn't think lust alone described his current emotions.
Although it was certainly an element of what he felt. Images of her smooth naked body stretched out on the narrow bed in his stateroom filled his head, and he realized that he wanted to do much more than kiss her. He wanted to bury himself so deep inside her she wouldn't know where she ended and he began. He wanted the right to sleep in her bed every night and rejoiced at the thought of planting a child in her womb.
Hard arousal pressed against the buttons of his fly. Bloody hell. She'd better change her mind about marrying him soon. Not that she showed any signs of doing so. Intractable wench.
As his body responded to his thoughts, he began to wonder if waiting to make love to her again until they were married was the best course of action. It had seemed the most honorable line to take on the ship. Her refusal to consider marriage had convinced him to stay away from her, first out of anger because the thought that she considered him in the same league as her father still rankled, then in the hopes that she would miss what they had experienced and want it enough to risk marriage.
Although sound reasoning, it didn't appear to be working. She acted as if she didn't remember the way her body responded to his. He could think of numerous ways to remind her, ways that would give them both satisfaction. How better to convince her that marriage to him was the right choice? He would show her that the afternoon in his cabin was just the beginning of what they could experience together as man and wife.
She would be forced to realize that she belonged to him.
Thea's voice pulled him from his thoughts. "Do not think that your lamentable tendency to refer to yourself in such inappropriate terms has made me forget your words to my aunt."
"She deserved to know my intentions."
"That's ridiculous. Your intentions are neither here nor there as far as my aunt is concerned."
She truly was naive about the ways of the ton. "Do you remember my aunt's reaction to me visiting you aboard ship?"
"Yes, but that was a temporary aberration. Look at how calmly she reacted to finding us kissing in the hall."
His aunt's so-called calm reaction was the result of him telling her he had every intention of marrying Thea before the Golden Dragon had ever sailed into port. She knew once he made up his mind, he let nothing stand in his way. Not even headstrong women with independent natures and not enough sense.
"The gossip that will undoubtedly start to circulate once she begins to introduce you to Society will cause a reaction in your aunt similar to the one mine had on the ship. In other words, she won't take it calmly at all. I didn't want her to worry, so I told her my intentions were honorable."
After all, Lady Upworth had reason to doubt it. He was his father's son. As much as he would like to forget that fact, Society never would.
Thea stirred next to him and placed her hand on his arm. She gave it a gentle squeeze. "That's very thoughtful of you, but don't you think she'll be disappointed when we don't marry?"
He had no intention of disappointing her aunt or himself. "Don't worry. She's more likely to be relieved in the meantime."
A huge breath of air escaped from between Thea's lips. "I wish everyone would give up this idea of introducing me to Society. It's just complicating everything and is bound to take time away from my investigation. Can you imagine the hours I'll have to waste shopping for new clothes?"
Thea made shopping for clothes sound like a fate worse than death. "Come, don't you think you will enjoy the time with your aunt? Besides, I have yet to meet a lady who wasn't interested in her wardrobe."
He watched her take her lower lip between her teeth and wanted to stop the carriage and cover that little lip with his own. Then he would trail kisses down her neck. She would make sexy little noises in the back of her throat. He would touch her breasts, first through the fabric of her gown, and then peeling the fabric away, he'd put his hands on her naked skin.
His already hard body began to ache. He almost missed her answer to his statement.
"I suppose I will enjoy the time with my aunt. I like Lady Boyle as well, but I'm not particularly interested in gowns and fripperies and I am not at all interested in being presented to the ton."
"You heard your aunt. It's important to her."
"She wants me to take my rightful place in Society, but that won't work."
"Why not?"
"Because I haven't been raised to it, for one thing. The girl I might have been does not exist in the woman I am."
"You do not have to be anything different than you are to charm Society. Look how well you have charmed me."
She did not smile as he had expected.
Instead, her face took on a very serious expression. "I have not charmed you. I seduced you. There's a difference."
Following upon his earlier thoughts, her comment caused no small reaction in him. His body tightened while his mind grappled with the problem of a willful female who actually believed she had seduced him. It wouldn't be a problem if she didn't sound so chagrined by the fact. "You didn't seduce me."
"Of course I did. You did not want to make love to me, but I begged you."
The last place he wanted to engage in a discussion of this nature was sitting in an open curricle, his hands firmly engaged with the ribbons. "Perhaps we could discuss that afternoon another time."
She tapped the parasol his aunt had insisted she bring against her boot. She had argued that England didn't have enough sun for a woman to have to worry about her complexion. Understandably, the argument had gone nowhere with his aunt.
"We don't need to discuss it at all. I was merely pointing out that I didn't charm you per se and that I'm unlikely to charm the ton."
"Nevertheless, you will allow my aunt and Lady Upworth to present you."
"I don't want to." She sounded like a small child defying her parent.
But Thea was a mature and intelligent woman. There had to be more to this than her concern for Merewether or her fear of not fitting in with society. From what he could tell, Thea wasn't truly afraid of anything. "Why?"
She fidgeted with her parasol handle. "I don't want to meet my father. I don't want to claim him, but I will not spend my time in England lying to protect him either."
"Don't you think it may be time to meet him? To make your peace with him?"
"How can you ask that after what he did to my mother? To me?"
The outrage in her voice washed over him and he hesitated to argue the point further, but his wife would have to have her place in Society. It would be important to his mother and grandfather, and therefore to him.
"Well, didn't your mother do something similar? After all, she took you from your father and never allowed him the pleasure of seeing his daughter grow into womanhood. Perhaps you will find that he is not such a monster after all."
It wasn't that he thought her father justified in his actions, but perhaps the man was not as horrible as Thea's mother had painted him.
She gasped. "You are defending him. I thought you understood. You said yourself he lacked integrity."
"People are imperfect, Thea. Your father has his flaws, but that doesn't mean he does not love you."
And if the man didn't love his daughter, Drake would make sure they spent little or no time in one another's company. He wanted her to be happy. He wasn't convinced that her insistence on never meeting or acknowledging her father was the cou
rse that would bring her the most joy.
"What about your father? Don't you think him settling money on you when you reached your majority was his way of showing his love?"
It was not the same thing at all. His father had not wanted him, had never acknowledged his existence. Thea knew her father wanted her, at least as a child, even if he had no longer wanted her mother.
"You don't know what you are talking about."
"That is convenient." She snapped her parasol open and used it like a shield between them. She spoke from the other side of the umbrella membrane. "When you wish to harangue me about my family, you are omniscient, but when I point out a fairly obvious conclusion, I am completely ignorant. I thought you were different from those gentlemen who believe a woman cannot have a brain in her head."
Her criticism irritated him. He knew she was intelligent, but that didn't mean she was right. His father had given him money because that was the way things were done in the ton. It said nothing of any tender feelings the man had toward his son.
They arrived at Merewether Shipping at that moment and Drake was saved from having to answer her accusation.
As he drew the curricle in front of a large brick building with a modest sign that proclaimed it to be Merewether Shipping, their argument ceased to exist for Thea. Each passing mile had eaten away at her confident assumption that she could unmask the thief. London was a vast city, entirely different from her small island home.
Even Merewether Shipping looked too large, too impressive, to be her little company. Until now, the size of her company had been limited to ledgers and bank drafts. Now that she was faced with the prospect of entering the huge brick building, finding the person responsible for the attacks on her life as well as the thefts seemed impossible.
She lowered her parasol and shifted her gaze to Drake. Gratitude for his solid presence beside her overwhelmed Thea.
"Thank you."
His eyes widened a small fraction. "Why?"
"For helping me."
Drake tossed a coin to a boy and told him to hold the horses, then turned to face her.
He placed his hands on either side of her cheeks. "We will find the culprit."
She put her hands over his, drawing on his assurance and his strength. "We must. Uncle Ashby's safety depends on it."
"So does yours."
"That's not as important."
He leaned his head down until their lips were almost touching. "It is to me."
Then he kissed her, just once and very softly, but Thea felt it right down to her toes. How could she even think of living her life without this man?
Ignorant of the shattering realization his small kiss had precipitated, Drake jumped blithely down from the carriage. He came around to help her down. She placed her hand in his, allowing the feeling of safety that always accompanied his touch to wash over her.
He kept her firmly tucked into his side as they walked toward the building. They stopped in front of the shipping office to get their bearings, as if by mutual consent, though neither said anything.
"I grow weak in the knees at the thought of you attempting this investigation alone."
She smiled at the image of Drake weak in the knees. Still, she understood his concern. The docks were teeming with tough-looking sailors and dirty children hawking everything from meat pies to penny press papers. Bawds dressed in garments that did not completely cover their rouged nipples leaned against the walls of warehouses on either side of Merewether Shipping. One woman's petticoats were dampened to show off the curves below her waist. Thea shivered in sympathy for her.
England's cold had not come as a complete surprise, but the way it seeped into her very bones did. And the smell. Thea wrinkled her nose at the odor emanating from the Thames. Garbage floated on the surface in places, but for all that, the river and docks were an impressive sight. Feelings of inadequacy and ignorance of the City's ways pressed in on her.
She shivered again, but this time at the thought of her own naiveté in believing she could have conducted the investigation alone. Uncle Ashby's life would be better served in someone else's more capable hands, but she was all he had.
Then she smiled. And Drake. Uncle Ashby had Drake on his side as well, though he didn't know it.
She pulled toward the building. "Let's go inside."
Drake gently restrained her. "What's the matter?"
She looked up into the brown depths of his eyes, and they glowed with concern.
"It's just that I realized how foolish I was to believe that someone raised on a small island, like me, could accomplish such a heavy task in this place." She waved her hand toward the brick building and the busy docks. "I had not realized the immensity of it all. Without your help I … I'm not sure what I would have done. It's just all so overwhelming."
"I have no doubt that you could do all that you set out to do."
She stared at him. "Truly?"
He nodded. "You are a resourceful and intelligent woman, Thea."
"Thank you." His confidence warmed her.
They entered the shipping office through a large and heavy door. As it closed behind them, the sights and sounds of the busy docks were cut off. The hallway in which they stood felt a world away from the busy activity outside. It was lined with doors, all of them closed. Not even a stray voice filtered out to lessen the feeling of isolation.
A young man, wearing a coat and pantaloons cut in the latest fashion, came out of one of the offices. His blond hair curled around his collar. He looked up from a sheaf of papers in his hands and made a small noise as if startled. "May I help you?"
"We are looking for Emerson Merewether." Thea pulled off her gloves as she spoke and tucked them into her reticule. She raised her gaze to the young man. "Would you please show us to his office?"
The man nodded. "Certainly."
He turned and headed back the way he had come, stopping at the first office on his right. He opened the door and leaned in. "Mr. Merewether, some people here to see you."
Drake led Thea into the room and she could not help smiling. It looked very much like Uncle Ashby's office back home, only it was missing the little haven of tea table and chairs. Every available surface was covered with papers or shipping crates. The man sitting behind the desk looked up to greet them. She felt as if she were seeing a young version of Uncle Ashby. Emerson had the same rounded build and jovial expression on his face.
She stepped forward and put out her hand. "Hello. I am Thea Selwyn and this is Mr. Drake."
Emerson Merewether took her hand and shook it. "Miss Selwyn? My uncle's partner?"
She nodded, extracting her hand from his grasp. "Yes. It's a pleasure to finally meet you, Mr. Merewether."
"I had no idea you were planning a trip to England?" He asked it as a question, clearly expecting a response from the man behind her.
"It's a surprise to me as well, Mr. Merewether."
"Thea's decision to travel to England was rather spur-of-the-moment. None of us had much notice of her intentions," Drake said.
He made it sound as if they had known each other a long time. As if he would have been aware of her plans. What was he about?
"I'm sorry. Mr. Drake, is it? Would you and Miss Selwyn care to take a seat?" Emerson had certainly adjusted quickly to the unexpected arrival of one of his employers.
Drake looked around him and undoubtedly saw just what she did. There was no available surface to sit on. The blond man rushed into the room and began moving papers. Soon two wooden chairs facing Emerson's desk were free. Drake escorted her to one before taking the other.
Emerson looked up at the blond man. "Barton, see about having some refreshments brought, would you?"
Laying her reticule and parasol across her knees, she said, "That won't be necessary. We are here for a short business meeting."
Barton stopped at the door. "Would you like me to stay then, Mr. Merewether?"
Emerson shook his head. "That won't be necessary. I'll call you s
hould I need anything." He turned his attention to her and Drake. "Barton is my assistant."
Thea nodded her understanding. "As you said, his presence should not be required for now."
Barton left and the room went silent for a moment. How was she to introduce the topic of searching the current ledgers? Drake took care of it for her.
"Mr. Merewether, I am considering expanding my shipping company by going into partnership with your uncle and Thea."
Emerson's face registered much more shock at this statement than at her arrival. "I just received a letter from Uncle Ashby and nothing was said. Had I known Uncle was looking for another business partner, I should have purchased my way into the company myself."
Oh dear. The hurt in Emerson's voice was unmistakable. Thea rushed to soothe him. "I assure you, Mr. Merewether, we had no intention of excluding you."
"I need to write Uncle Ashby. This is a most shocking development."
Thea felt their plan unraveling before her. She did not want Emerson writing his uncle.
Drake's laughter shocked her. She turned her head to see his face.
His smile was directed at Emerson. "You misunderstood the nature of our partnership. Thea and I are engaged, and as part of the marriage settlements, her portion of Merewether Shipping will come under my control."
She swallowed her gasp of surprise. She would take Drake to task later for his lie. Right now, she would go along because at least it would discourage Emerson from writing his uncle.
Emerson's smile returned. A smile so like Uncle Ashby's that feelings of longing for her life back on the island overwhelmed her. "I did not realize you meant that sort of association. May I offer you my deepest felicitations?"
Thea summoned a weak smile. "Thank you."
Drake inclined his head to acknowledge the sentiments. "In order to prepare for the marriage settlements, I would like to spend some time looking over your books."