The Days of Redemption

by Shelley Shepard Gray

  “Danke, but I have Dr. Palmer. The Sugarbush Centre is part of the Cleveland Clinic, you know.” Inwardly, she winced. She sounded full of herself.

  “You are in good hands, then. Even I have heard of Dr. Palmer. He has a formidable reputation.” Standing up, he patted her shoulder. “I’ll be back this evening, Elsie.” Playfully, he wagged a finger at her. “But you had better not be here.”

  She smiled. “I won’t. My time is almost up. There’s so many of us, we have to take turns visiting.”

  When he left, Elsie leaned back again and watched her mother sleep. She hoped that before long, Mamm would soon be wide awake and bossing them all around.

  Closing her eyes, she prayed that would be the case. And as the machines beeped and rang around her, she gave herself over to their mechanical rhythm and prayed some more.

  “Elsie?” her father said from the doorway. “The driver has arrived. Viola’s going to take her turn now, so we need to head on home.”

  “All right.” After kissing her mother’s paperlike cheek, she followed her daed out to the waiting room, pausing only briefly to glance her twin’s way.

  Then, they walked outside into the bright sunlight, where the van was waiting.

  The sudden change in light stung her eyes something awful. If she’d been alone, she would have stopped and pressed her palms to her eyes in a puny effort to shield her vision.

  But her father was there, and he already had so many worries, she was afraid if she added one more burden, he might not be able to handle it. So she squinted and walked across the small covered portico.

  Pretended she felt no pain.

  And tried not to show how upset she was that the light of day was making her long for the dark of night. It didn’t seem fair that she was yearning for the darkness when soon that would be all she had.

  It was going to be time to call Dr. Palmer again. He’d warned her of this . . . that one day things were going to get bad enough that they’d have to talk seriously about her future.

  Of course, she hadn’t counted on that day being so soon.

  But she wasn’t going to call, not quite yet. Once she knew the truth there would be no going back.

  Instead, she decided to let her mind drift to Roman’s new friend Landon. So far, she’d seen him almost every day this week. And though they hadn’t talked much, she’d felt his eyes rest on her a time or two.

  Just as she’d found herself gazing his way when she was sure he wasn’t looking.

  As their van sped east along on the interstate, Peter Keim glanced at his daughter, saw she was staring straight ahead with a pained expression, and considered again how to best phrase his question.

  Questioning Elsie always took a bit of forethought.

  “You’ve been awful quiet this afternoon. Is anything the matter? I mean, besides the obvious.”

  With a turn of her head, she looked at him, just as if she’d suddenly realized he was sitting by her side. “Nothing is wrong.” She winced. “I mean, I was just thinking about someone. I mean something.”

  “What? Who?”

  “Nothing. I’m fine, Daed.”

  He’d noticed the look of pain on her face. “Are you sure? Are you more worried than usual about Mamm? Or are your eyes bothering you? It seemed like you were wincing a bit when we stepped outside.”

  “I am fine, Daed. Please don’t worry.”

  Did she sound more tense than usual? More on edge?

  Perhaps, like Viola, she was blaming him for their mother’s collapse. After all, Marie wouldn’t have ended up in the hospital if he’d been home. He would have made sure she would have gone to the doctor the moment her cough got bad.

  The very fact that he’d even been away was his doing, too. He was the one who had an alcohol problem. It had gotten so bad that he’d been forced to go to a treatment program near Columbus to combat it.

  Once he’d gotten there, his optimism had faltered just about the moment the depth of his addiction hit home. Because of the insular nature of the program, he hadn’t been allowed to call home much, and when he had, Marie’s voice had sounded flustered and rushed. He’d felt so guilty about leaving her that those feelings had overridden any feelings of satisfaction he’d been experiencing about his recovery.

  Now, he was the one who was trying to hold everyone together while Marie was the one in need.

  He soon realized that his absence had created a terrible crack in their family’s foundation. It was going to take patience and effort to put things to right. But, just as his counselor had said time and again, all he had to do was take small steps. Even small steps counted as moving forward.

  He cleared his throat, determined to try again. “You know, we’ve still got almost another hour of sitting in the van. Then, when we get home, we’re liable to be surrounded by the family. We ought to use this time to chat, just the two of us.”

  “You want to chat? Now?” Her voice seemed a little clipped. A little un-Elsie-like.

  He was embarrassed. The counselor had warned him that his new resolve to talk about things instead of bury them was going to be new for his family.

  “Are you upset with me?” Of course, the moment he asked that, he wished he could take the question back. Elsie had to be upset with him. He’d betrayed the family’s trust by secretly drinking for months. When he’d been unable to stop on his own, he’d left them at the worst possible time.

  Small steps. “Elsie, if you are upset, I understand,” he said, his words sounding foreign even to his ears. “We can talk about that, if you’d like.”

  Her mouth tightened. “Nee. Don’t worry.”

  “I can’t help but worry about you, Elsie. It’s a parent’s job to worry, you know. And I still can do that just fine.”

  But instead of making her smile like he’d intended, she blushed. Just as if he’d suddenly embarrassed her. “Daed, I am a grown woman. Why do you insist on talking to me as if I were a child?”

  Shocked by her accusation, he floundered. “I . . . I was only attempting—”

  “I never hear you speak like this to Viola or Roman. I don’t need your extra concern.”

  Stung, he ached to explain himself, to tell her how worried they all were about her eyesight. Perhaps God would soon give him the perfect words to say.

  But now? There was nothing to do but sit back in silence and watch the countryside pass them by.

  chapter two

  “Roman, there’s no need to bring me inside your haus,” Landon Troyer protested. “I don’t need anything to drink. I’ll be fine until I get to my own home.”

  But his neighbor Roman Keim merely kept walking toward his house, his muddy boots kicking up chunks of dirt in their wake.

  “Nonsense,” he called out over his shoulder. “The least I can do is give you a glass of water. You’ve been helping me plow for two straight days.”

  Landon didn’t like feeling like he’d done anything special. All he’d done was help out a neighbor. “You would have done the same for me, Roman.”

  “Maybe I would have . . . but your help was a godsend.” After taking a few more steps, Roman stopped and turned to face him. “I have no idea what we would have done if you hadn’t been here to help me prep the fields. There’s no way I would have gotten that alfalfa in on time if it weren’t for you.”

  All this praise was embarrassing. “It was nothing.” Besides, after he’d first seen Roman’s sister Elsie, he’d had an ulterior motive to visit. He’d wanted to see her again. So far, he’d gotten lucky. Their paths had crossed several times, and once, he’d even talked to her briefly.

  That had been all the incentive he’d needed to visit again. There was something about Elsie that struck his fancy, and he was eager to discover what it was.

  Roman, on the other hand, thought he’d only been helping out because he was so selfless.

  “Come now. You only moved in two weeks ago, and you’ve been spending at least half your time on our land.”

&
nbsp; “Not quite half.”

  “Plus, it’s been raining and miserable out.” He grimaced as he gazed at his muddy boots. “I was only out there for five hours, and I’m practically covered head to toe with muck.”

  Landon was covered with dirt and mud and who knew what else as well.

  Which was yet another reason to stay out of the Keim’s picture-perfect house. If, by chance, Elsie was inside, he had no desire for her to see him in his current state.

  Nothing set a woman off like the smell of fresh manure.

  “I’ve been glad to help your family in any way I could. That’s what neighbors are for, ain’t so?”

  “Jah.” Roman nodded. “And, neighbors give each other glasses of water, too. So, you’re going to come in and let me at least do this. Right?” He lowered his voice. “Besides, I want you to meet Amanda.”

  Just saying his wife’s name put a smile on Roman’s face. Landon knew Roman was a newlywed. It was obvious he was reveling in his new station in life, and anxious to show his wife off.

  And Landon supposed if he was ever in that situation, he would feel the same way. “I’d like to meet her, too.”

  “Now you’re seeing things my way.” Roman grinned.

  Stopping at the stoop, Landon followed Roman’s lead and pulled off his muddy boots. “So, you think Amanda is in here?”

  “Pretty sure. The women are usually working on supper about this time of day.”

  After placing his boots neatly against the wall, he said, “I still can’t believe we married so quickly, and with my mamm in the hospital, too.” Roman paused with his hand at the door. “But Amanda said life was for living, you know? She wanted us to be together during this tough time, and I wanted it, too. Plus, she’s already had a big wedding,” he added, his words slipping off his tongue at lightning speed. “She said she didn’t need all that fuss again.”

  Landon recalled that Roman’s wife was a widow, and with a young daughter as well. After leading Landon into the mudroom, Roman continued, his voice almost a whisper. “The bishop gave us a quiet ceremony soon after we arrived in town. My family wasn’t too pleased that we married without them, but they got over it. Amanda’s that special.”

  As Roman washed his hands, Landon shrugged off his black jacket and hung it on a peg. He, for one, couldn’t imagine doing something so spontaneous. Marrying a woman on the spur of the moment sounded as foreign to him as suddenly wanting to drive a car.

  Though, he realized with a bit of chagrin, he could imagine being intrigued by a woman after only the briefest of conversations.

  But there was no reason for Roman to know that. “You’re a lucky man,” he said instead. “Truly blessed.”

  “I am, indeed.” He dried his hands as Landon washed off his grime. Then they walked into the kitchen, which was filled with feminine laughter.

  Then it stopped, as one by one, the three women inside caught sight of them.

  One woman had to be in her sixties. She had fine brown eyes that were sharp, and seemed to take in every bit of him from top to bottom. On either side of her were two women who looked to be about Roman’s age. One was all shades of gold, from her lightly tanned face and arms, to her blond hair and bright blue eyes. She was shredding carrots.

  The other was Elsie. And once again, she was gazing at him through a pair of thick lenses in a most direct way.

  He wondered what she thought about him. Wondered what she’d say if she discovered that he’d been hoping to see her every time he’d visited her farm.

  Feeling a bit flustered, he looked away, but not before noticing that she looked as pretty as ever. Today she wore a violet dress with a crisp black apron over it. Her hair lay smooth and neat under her white kapp.

  In front of her on the table was a beige stoneware bowl half filled with snapped green beans.

  As the seconds passed, Landon stood awkwardly in the doorway. He rarely felt tongue-tied, and he rarely stood still. He was a man usually characterized by action.

  But at the moment? He had his hands clasped in front of him like a schoolboy and was trying not to meet Elsie’s direct gaze. If he did, he knew he would probably start blushing or some such nonsense.

  The elderly woman broke the silence. “Who are you?” she asked.

  Roman stepped forward, just as if he didn’t notice a bit of the tension in the room. “Mommi, this is Landon Troyer. He’s our new neighbor. Do you remember me saying that someone moved to the land on our east?”

  “I remember.”

  Roman grinned, obviously used to his grandmother’s tart way of speaking. “Landon, this is my grandmother Lovina Keim.” Next, he pointed to his sister. “And I believe you’ve met Elsie before.”

  He nodded in her direction. “It’s good to see you again, Elsie.”

  Her eyes widened, then she nodded, too. “Hello, Landon.”

  Roman, completely oblivious to Landon’s mood, gestured at the lovely golden-haired woman. “And this here is Amanda, my wife.”

  Before he could say a word in response, Mrs. Keim spoke. “You bought the Gingriches’ farm?”

  “I did.”

  “Why did they sell it?”

  “I’m not sure. But I bought it because the price was right,” he replied. “It’s a good piece of land, for sure.”

  “Hmmph. Where do you hail from?”

  “Near Medina.” He drew in a breath, hoping to ask a question or two. Maybe even say something more to Elsie . . . but Lovina fired off another question.

  “What brings you here? Was it only the land?”

  Landon fought to keep back his smile. He couldn’t remember the last time he’d been questioned in such a manner. “The land is good, but I came out because of my brother Daniel. He moved to Berlin a couple of years ago and started a flooring business. I wanted to work with him.”

  There was much more to his story, of course. After hearing about Daniel’s success, Landon knew joining his business made good sense. And though Daniel had offered a spare bedroom in his house, Landon didn’t want to start out in a new town like that.

  He’d wanted a place of his own.

  So, he’d bided his time, and spent the last two years working as much as he could. He’d saved almost every penny and had asked his brother to keep an eye out for farms for sale. Just recently, it had all come together.

  And then there was Tricia, of course, the woman who’d nearly broken his heart when she told him that she couldn’t wait for his time lines . . . and had actually found another man who didn’t have such grand plans so far away from her family.

  Her rejection had pushed him to move forward even faster.

  “Are you married?” Mrs. Keim blurted.

  “Nee.”

  “Ever?”

  “Never, ever.” He smiled, enjoying the rapid questioning. He raised his chin, ready to hear her next jab.

  But Roman held up a hand instead. “Mommi, stop. I brought Landon inside to get a drink, not to be interrogated.”

  “I’m hardly interrogating him. Just being neighborly.”

  “Mommi, neighbors don’t badger. Not good ones, at least.”

  “Hmmph.”

  “Landon, you mustn’t mind my grandmother,” Elsie interjected smoothly. “She’s like this with everyone. And, just so you know, you certainly don’t ever have to answer her questions. Why, sometimes I pretend I don’t hear her.”

  Lovina looked Elsie’s way. “I hear you, however.”

  “Thank you for the advice.” Landon chuckled softly.

  “Anytime. I’m happy to help.”

  Forgetting that he was covered with mud and manure, he crossed his arms in front of his chest. “Maybe next time I see you, we can talk some more.”

  “Perhaps,” she said demurely.

  Looking from Elsie to Landon, Amanda smiled. “Landon, would you care to sit down and join us? We’d like to get to know you better.”

  “I would enjoy that. Verra much. But I’m pretty muddy. Perhaps another tim
e?” He kept his words polite, general. Tried to look anywhere instead of only at Elsie. It wouldn’t do to continue to mildly flirt with her. Roman seemed like the sort who wouldn’t appreciate that much at all.

  “You know? Here I invited you over, but never even gave you something to drink.” Roman walked to the refrigerator and got out a pitcher of water. After filling two glasses, he handed one to Landon. “Here.”

  Feeling a bit conspicuous, Landon sipped as quickly as he dared while the women watched.

  Too tempted to stare at Roman’s sister again, he set his glass back on the counter with a bit too much force. “Danke.”

  Mrs. Keim clucked her tongue. “Is everything all right?”

  “It is fine. I simply need to get going.” Glancing at the women, he nodded. “See you soon.”

  “Goodbye, Landon,” Elsie said with a sunny smile.

  Roman looked at his sister for a moment, then turned toward the door. “Let me walk you out, Landon. I hadn’t realized it was so late.”

  “No need to walk me anywhere. I can find my way out without a problem,” he said lightly.

  After all, Landon reflected as he grabbed his coat and slipped back on his boots, he had certainly found a way to return.

  When the kitchen door closed behind the men, Lovina tried her best to look irritated. She wasn’t supposed to be amused by a young man’s impudence . . . or the small flash of interest she’d spied in both Landon’s and Elsie’s eyes.

  There was something about that man that she liked. She’d been impressed with the way he hadn’t been cowed by all the women inspecting him like he was a new product out for their enjoyment. She’d been particularly impressed by the way he’d held his ground about his private life. As a person who’d kept her share of secrets, she knew keeping a steady hold on one’s privacy wasn’t an especially easy thing to do.

  “Hmmph. What did you girls think of Landon Troyer?” she asked.

  “Prickly,” Amanda said with a grin. “He’s not one to put up with much nonsense, is he?”

  “Not from me, at least,” she admitted.

  Amanda laughed easily. “As a new member of the Keim family, I have to admit to being mighty impressed by his refusal to tell you anything else about himself. I certainly wasn’t that relaxed when we first met.”