Angel Without

by Rhiannon Ayers

  And he still wasn’t finished with her.

  “Not high enough, angel,” he snarled against her lips, stealing a hard kiss before continuing. “Not nearly high enough.” And he clamped his hands around her forearms, holding her down as his hips started kicking even harder, faster than before. “I’m going to come soon. And when I do, you’re going to clamp down around me and come all around my cock. Understand me? You come when I come, angel. I want to feel this hot little pussy turn to liquid silk when I go off.”

  Amber moaned as his command worked its way into her bloodstream, nearly setting her off right then. Maddox reared back and yanked her legs from around his waist, leaning forward with his arms braced behind her knees so she was spread open wide beneath him. Amber shuddered convulsively as she looked down her body and watched his cock pistoning in and out of her tight sheath. The new angle let him ride her deeper, harder still, until his thrusts started tearing grunts from her throat. Maddox hissed with the force of his pleasure, those quicksilver eyes darting back and forth between her face and the place where their bodies were joined. Both of them watched his shaft sink into her repeatedly, coated with the evidence of her arousal.

  It went on forever, yet not nearly long enough. Amber was practically screaming, moaning uncontrollably by the time his thrusts grew erratic. Maddox gritted his teeth, little groans rumbling from his body as his muscles tightened visibly. Amber held her breath, waiting, waiting, waiting…

  Until finally, Maddox buried himself balls-deep and froze, right before he shouted, “Come! Now!”

  The universe held its breath for a moment.

  A heartbeat later, Amber felt his thick shaft pulse deep inside her, felt the fiery hot strings of his cum burn her right through the layer of latex separating them. The moment she felt his release, her eyes rolled back in her head, and she screamed with the force of pleasure inundating her.

  She and Maddox both shook convulsively in the throes of their simultaneous release, both of them breathless and panting by the time they started coming down from that addictive high. Her orgasm was so long, so incredibly mind-blowing, she lost her spirit in a sea of ecstasy unlike anything she’d ever known. And by the time she started coming back to herself, she knew, down to the last atom in her body, that she would never, ever, be the same again.

  When the last aftershock finally faded, Amber lifted her arms, looped the knotted t-shirt over Maddox’s head, and pulled him down for a desperate kiss. Maddox groaned into her mouth as he settled on top of her, kissing her slowly, lazily, as if he couldn’t get enough of her. Amber trembled, heart aching on so many levels.

  This one man had, in the space of an hour, shown her what it truly meant to be loved by another person. His mind, his body, his spirit, his very being, suddenly became more precious to her than the air she breathed. In that instance, she lost her heart to him, fell in love so deeply, so completely, she wondered how she’d ever mistaken this feeling for anything else.

  How did it happen so fast? No one fell in love in the space of two days. How could Maddox—and Riley—have wormed their way into her heart so quickly? Because she was well on her way to being in love with Riley, too. What was it about these two men that turned her into this simpering, love-struck girl? None of this made any sense. Yet here she was, head-over-heels in love with not one, but two men, and all in the space of forty-eight hours.

  None of this could be real. And yet, a tiny voice inside her whispered, it was.

  Chapter 21

  Riley stood at the foot of the bed, watching Maddox and Amber sleep, and thought, Well, it was bound to happen sooner or later.

  He just wished it hadn’t happened quite so fast.

  Not that he was upset that the two of them had finally hooked up. On the contrary, when he walked into Maddox’s townhouse and realized they were both still upstairs—and probably in bed together—he’d been overwhelmed by elation. The two people he cared about more than anyone else in his life had finally gotten past some of their issues so they could be together. He’d wanted to do a major happy dance around the block, wanted to do the world’s biggest fist bump. Not knowing what happened after he left, he couldn’t know for sure what exactly went down, but obviously something had happened to make Amber turn the corner and start trusting Maddox. And now here they were, nested together like spoons in a drawer and sleeping the sleep of the sexually sated, and Riley couldn’t be happier for them.

  Except now, they had no need of Riley. Without Amber’s fear keeping them apart, they had no reason to want Riley between them anymore. Had no reason to welcome his intrusion into their blossoming relationship, no reason to tolerate his presence in their private lives. Sure, Maddox had said he loved him, but that was before he knew he could be with Amber. And Amber probably hadn’t wanted Riley there in the first place—except maybe as a buffer, a safe zone between her and Maddox. Now that neither one of them needed him to run interference, he had no business pretending he had a place here, with both of them.

  Two days. I had two days with them. At least I had that much.

  Riley closed his eyes, took a deep breath, and let it out slowly. Time to get his stuff and go back to his place. If he moved quietly enough, neither one of them should realize he’d been here. And that was as it should be, since the most important thing for the two of them right now was cementing their bond. Riley needed to get his shit and get the fuck out, before either one of them felt obligated to let him down easy.

  Especially since there was no “easy” for Riley in this. Yeah, okay, he’d known this was a temporary deal from the start. Had always understood that Maddox and Amber only wanted him with them because he somehow made it easier for them to be comfortable around each other. And he’d known the moment they got past their issues, they’d be showing him the door. He’d known that, understood it, accepted it even—yet somehow, he’d let himself get attached. Let his heart get involved when he knew it wasn’t meant to last, no matter how much Riley might wish otherwise. But that was his problem, not theirs.

  Time to be the bigger man, Riley. Just suck it up, and get the fuck out of here.

  Squaring his shoulders, he padded into the bathroom to retrieve his razors and toothbrush. Funny, when he’d dropped them off this morning, he’d felt all gooey inside, tickled by the idea of having his own toothbrush in Maddox’s house. Too bad he’d never actually gotten to use it, but again, that was his problem for assuming he would need it in the first place. Maddox hadn’t invited him to bring his shit there, after all. That’d been Riley’s idea. Hopefully the guy hadn’t noticed. Otherwise, Riley might be in for some seriously uncomfortable conversations.

  Shaking his head at himself, Riley made his way out of the bedroom, pausing for one last look at his former lovers before heading for the stairs. The two of them looked so peaceful, sleeping there. Maddox lay on his side with Amber tucked against his chest, both of them snoring gently. Amber had her hands wrapped around Maddox’s forearm, which was cinched across her upper torso, obscuring Riley’s view of her gorgeous breasts. Both of them were naked, lying on top of the comforter, as if they’d fallen asleep before having a chance to get tucked in. Or maybe Maddox’s body heat was enough to keep them both from needing any additional covering. Lord knows, Riley had been nice and toasty when he was the one lying in Maddox’s arms last night.

  Damn it. Dashing that mental image from his brain, Riley bolted down the stairs, trying to be as quiet as he could while still hauling ass. He needed to get out of this house before his hormones got the best of him. Otherwise, he might give in to the temptation to crawl right into bed with them. And right now, he knew for absolute certain that neither one of them would welcome the intrusion.

  Downstairs, he headed for the living room, where he’d stashed half of his box of condoms this morning. Had, in fact, stashed them all over the house, just in case things got kinky in rooms besides the bedroom. Maybe it was only wishful thinking, but he had kind of been hoping to need them.

&n
bsp; Clever, wasn’t I? Ah, well. If I miss a few, I’m sure Maddox will make good use of them.

  He was digging around in the drawer of one of Maddox’s end tables when a sudden voice stopped him cold.

  “I’m hoping you’re getting all those condoms together because you’re planning on coming upstairs with them,” Maddox said, sounding so goddamn sexy it made Riley’s knees weak, “and not because you’re planning on leaving with them.”

  Riley squeezed his eyes shut as he straightened slowly, speaking over his shoulder. “Hey, man. Didn’t mean to wake you.”

  “Look at me, Riley.”

  The unwavering command in Maddox’s tone hardened Riley’s cock instantly. Swallowing past a suddenly dry throat, Riley turned. Maddox stood at the foot of the staircase, dressed in nothing but a pair of those dark gray boxer-briefs he seemed to favor. Amber stood a couple steps above him, looking incredibly sexy wearing one of Maddox’s T-shirts. It was huge on her, coming down to her knees like a baggy dress, yet seeing those mouth-watering legs peeking underneath the hemline of that plain white shirt made Riley want to drop to his knees in front of her. Goddamn, the two of them were beautiful, especially standing together like that. Riley would probably end up jerking off to memories of how they looked right now for the rest of his life.

  Amber wrapped her hands around Maddox’s bicep, looking so fucking gorgeous it made his heart go into overdrive. “You’re leaving us?” she asked in that breathy whisper of hers.

  Riley licked his lips, gaze darting back and forth between her blue eyes and Maddox’s gray ones. “Well…I mean…It looks like you guys got past your differences, and all…just thought I’d make it easier on all of us…”

  Maddox raised an eyebrow, silver eyes flashing in the dim room. It wasn’t quite sunset, but the house faced east, so the shadows inside were already deep. “Easier? How? How will leaving us make it easier, Riley?”

  His mouth opened, closed, opened again, without any sound coming out. He cleared his throat, tried again. “Look, I don’t want to make a scene, okay? Just…let’s not do this.”

  Amber released Maddox’s arm and walked into the living room, coming to a stop about a foot away from Riley. She looked up at him with eyes filled with shadows. “Are you upset with us? Did we hurt you by being together without you, Riley?”

  “Hell no,” he answered immediately. “Of course not.”

  “Then why leave?” Maddox said again. He started moving closer, using that ridiculously sexy panther-stalk of his. “Why would you try to sneak out without waking us, if you aren’t upset?”

  Riley winced, looking aside as the words popped out of his mouth before he could stop them. “Because you don’t need me anymore.”

  Silence.

  “Look, I get it, okay?” He ran his fingers through his hair, grimacing. “I totally get it. The shit you guys were dealing with…that’s some heavy stuff. Way past my pay grade. I get why you’d want another dude to act as a buffer while you got to know each other. But obviously you’re past it now, and I don’t want to be in the way. I’m glad you figured things out so fast. Really, I’m totally psyched for both of you.”

  He forced a smile, hoping he sounded sincere instead of devastated. “Really, I didn’t mean to wake you up. Why don’t you both go back to bed, and I’ll just get out of your hair. I mean it. It’s totally cool. I’m really, really happy for you both. Just let me get my shit and you can get back to it, okay? I promise, I’m fine.”

  In perfect unison, “We’re not.”

  Riley blinked. “Whoa. Did you guys, like, practice that, or something?”

  Maddox’s lips twitched, as if he fought a smile, while Amber grinned outright. But both of them sobered immediately.

  “Talk to us, Riley. Tell us what’s going on,” Amber said.

  Okay, this is what he was trying to avoid. Painful scenes just weren’t his deal. He had no desire to sit through the two of them trying to let him down easy, no desire to listen to sentences that started with, “We really like you, Riley, but…” Why couldn’t they just let him make a graceful exit?

  Riley twitched a shoulder, hoping his expression showed none of his inner turmoil. “I’m just trying to, you know, do the right thing.”

  “The right thing,” Amber repeated softly.

  Riley nodded. “Yeah. You two deserve each other. You don’t need me.”

  Both of them stared at him.

  “So, what happened earlier today,” Maddox said after a moment, his expression gone suddenly, frighteningly blank, “at the work site. The words we said to each other. Are you telling me you didn’t mean it?”

  Riley shot a furtive glance at Amber, praying she didn’t know what Maddox was talking about. No way would she want to know her new boyfriend had said those three magic words to someone else before saying them to her. Especially when circumstances had changed and those words no longer applied.

  He tried to look nonchalant. “Well, I mean, that was before you knew things would work out between you and her. It’s cool, man. What you guys have is special. You don’t need some fucked-up loser like me riding your coattails and dragging you down. I get it, okay? Just let me go.”

  “Well, I don’t get it. Why are you doing this?” Amber said. She sounded…hurt. Why would she sound hurt? Riley met her gaze, stunned to find honest confusion and, yes, pain in her beautiful blue eyes. Why was she upset with him? He’d thought she’d be grateful he was man enough to recognize when he wasn’t needed. She hadn’t wanted him in the first place, right? So why would she be upset to see him leaving? And why was Maddox acting weird? The guy should be happy Riley was stepping out of his way, happy to be getting Amber all to himself without a fight. He opened his mouth, not sure what he was going to say.

  “Amber…you don’t understand…”

  “No, I most certainly do not understand,” she agreed softly. “I don’t understand how you can tell a man you love him, then turn around and walk away.”

  Riley flinched. “That…that wasn’t…Maddox wasn’t supposed to…”

  Maddox laughed, but it wasn’t a happy sound. “Wasn’t what? Supposed to tell her about what happened between us? Why wouldn’t I tell her, Riley?”

  Riley blinked. “Because things have changed. You’re together now. The two of you.”

  Silence. Then, “I see.”

  Amber glanced at Maddox, a frown marring her brow, then turned back to Riley. “Well, I don’t. Please, don’t do this, Riley. Please.”

  “No, Amber. Let him go,” Maddox said. His voice was hollow, emotionless. “Riley’s made his choice.”

  Riley looked back at the taller man, watched the graceful way he turned and crossed the room, stopped in front of the door, and popped both deadbolts. Maddox pulled the portal open and turned, still holding the handle as he stood aside to give Riley room to walk out. Maddox’s eyes were no longer silver. Now they were a dead, blank gray.

  When Riley hesitated, Maddox gave him a sour smile. “I told you that first night, if you decided you couldn’t be with me…with us…I wouldn’t fight you on it. You’ve made your decision. So leave.”

  Pain ripped through Riley’s chest. Why did this hurt so much? He’d expected this, hadn’t he? He’d known all along they’d be letting him loose, trying to let him down easy so they could be with each other. This was what he’d expected.

  Except it wasn’t exactly going down the way he’d thought. Instead, he felt like he was the one letting them down. Which made no sense. At all.

  Riley glanced at Amber, noting her scowl, and turned back to Maddox’s blank stare. Swallowing past the pain and confusion clogging his throat, he gave both of them a sharp nod, gathered his dignity—what there was of it—and headed toward the door.

  “Don’t you dare,” Amber hissed suddenly. Riley froze mid-stride, turned to find her glaring at him with her fists balled at her sides. “Don’t you dare walk out that door, Riley.”

  Maddox sighed. “Amber…”

&nb
sp; She rounded on him. “Close the fucking door, Maddox. None of us are going anywhere until we figure this out.”

  The other man stared at her for a long, tense moment. Then he pushed the door shut and crossed his arms over his chest. “I don’t know what else needs to be said,” he rumbled quietly.

  “Why are the two of you being so stupid?” she nearly shouted, making both men stare at her in stunned amazement. Amber whirled, stabbed a finger toward Riley’s chest. “Why are you running away from us without talking to us? And why are you letting him go, Maddox? God, why do men have to be so close-mouthed with each other? Would it really kill you both to open up and talk about how you feel?”

  Maddox was scowling, now, too. “Amber, don’t.”

  “Don’t what?” she shouted, throwing her hands in the air in disgust. “Don’t acknowledge the pain you’re both in? Why can’t you talk to each other?”

  “And say what?” Maddox asked blandly. “‘I’m sorry I said I love you, Riley?’ ‘I’m sorry I said the words so you’d feel obligated to say them back?’ How does that help either one of us?”

  Riley’s jaw dropped. “Obligated? Dude, I didn’t…”

  “You don’t have to pretend anymore, Riley.” Maddox’s voice held no inflection, his face no expression. “I knew it would be difficult for you, okay? I knew you’d have a hard time being with another man. And now you’re leaving, because you can’t bring yourself to be with me.”

  “That’s not it at all!” Riley stared at Maddox, thunderstruck. “How could you say something like that? I’m not leaving because I’m freaked about falling in love with a guy!”

  “No,” Maddox agreed. “Just leaving because you’re not in love with me.”