by JA Low
“I’m all in, Stella,” I whisper to her. “I don’t want anything between us again,” I confess.
Today, having no barrier between us blew my mind. I’ve never felt such intimacy. Never felt so close to another woman before.
“But what if something happens?” she questions.
I move to my elbows and hover over her. “Then, I would be the happiest man in the world.” Her eyes widen. “I understand there’s a chance, but I told you, Stell, I’m all in. In every way, shape, and form you want me. I’m yours.”
Her eyes widen at my declaration.
“We’ll talk more Sunday. But just know that you’ve done me in.” While smiling down at her, the next thing I know, Stella is guiding me between her thighs, and my dick nudges her entrance.
“I’m yours, EJ,” she whispers, and that’s all I need to hear as I bury myself deep inside her.
36
Stella
I’m a goner.
I’ve woken up this morning on cloud nine.
Last night with EJ making love under the moonlight was so romantic. A dream. Then him whispering the words I have longed to hear that I’m his, that there is no one else, pushed me over the edge.
He could be just saying it in the heat of passion, a little voice deep inside of me questions.
He very well could be, but I guess I’m willing to take a chance if he is. EJ reassured me we would talk properly on Sunday night about us, and I simply have to wait until then.
Slowly, I make my way out to the kitchen to grab some breakfast. I wonder if the rest of the girls are up.
“Morning.” Ariana grins over her cup of coffee as she sits at the island bench alone.
“Morning,” I greet her.
“Coffee?”
“Yes, please.”
I need it.
I’m exhausted.
I think it was nearly sunrise by the time EJ left. We cuddled and may have had a couple more rounds before he finally went home.
Ariana pours me a cup while I take a seat at the kitchen table. She hands me the cup of goodness as she takes a seat beside me.
I savor the first sip—bliss.
“Where are the others?” Because it’s past nine in the morning, and they are generally up by now.
“They’ve popped back to the hotel. Lenna needed some Jagger cuddles, and I’m assuming Chloe needed some from Noah.” She grins. “So…” she stares at me from over her mug, her chocolate eyes dancing with mischief, “… you and EJ are keeping things on the down-low, I see.”
My body stills. What the? I chance a glance at her, and Ariana keeps smiling as if she’s holding onto a secret she is dying to tell.
“I don’t know what you mean?” Trying to work out what she knows has her in hysterics. What on earth is going on?
“Just FYI… you’re not as quiet as you thought you were.” Ariana gives me a wink, and I want to die. Oh my goodness. No. Embarrassment creeps up my neck in the form of bright red splotches, and I can feel the heat making its way up to my cheeks.
“Sounds like EJ knows what he’s doing.” Ariana chuckles.
“Don’t,” I tell her. “Shit, I am so embarrassed.”
She chuckles again. “Don’t be,” Ariana tries to reassure me. “I’m happy for you. I’m happy for your vagina, too.”
I bury my face in my hands.
Oh my God, I’m mortified.
“Stell.” Ariana grins. “It’s all good. I heard some noise, so I looked out my window and spotted you two having a great time. I closed my window and went back to bed. Not going to lie. I am jealous you were getting laid, but also pretty stoked that you are.” She reaches out and touches my hand. “I’m assuming things yesterday went much better than you told us last night?” I nod my head to her question. “Why didn’t you tell us?”
“Chloe would have us married off in two point five seconds,” I tell her honestly. Ariana nods in agreement over that statement. “We just wanted to work out what’s happening between us without the group interfering.”
“We do like to stick our noses into things.” Ariana grins.
“And I love you all for it,” I add. “I simply wanted to work out what was going on in my head first before I said anything.”
“I get that. You and EJ have been under a microscope since coming back from Vegas.” She squeezes my hand, and I am thankful she understands my need for privacy at the moment. “But now that I know, I need all the deets.” She grins.
So I decide to tell her because, if I’m honest, I need someone to talk to about it all.
“Wow. Okay. You have had an actioned-packed twenty-four hours.” Ariana grins. “I’m happy for you, Stell. You deserve happiness.”
“Thanks, babe. And so do you.”
She gives me a small smile. “Gray is entertaining me for the moment. He’s a nice summer fling.” She gives me a knowing wink.
“How’s work going?” I ask as we haven’t had a chance to catch up since she had to go back to the city.
Ariana rolls her eyes at my question. “It sucks.” She moans. “I’ve been thinking more and more about what we spoke about the other weekend regarding me going out on my own.” My eyes widen at her statement. “And… I’m going to do it.”
“That’s amazing.”
“Thanks. I have to get my shit together before I quit, though.” She sighs heavily. “As much as I would like to tell them to fuck off, I need the money.”
“Do you think you’re going to stay in New York? Or are you planning on moving out to the suburbs?”
“I’m not sure yet. I love the city, but I’m not sure if that’s where my business should be.” She shrugs.
“The Hamptons is pretty nice.” We look out the window to the gorgeous blue ocean. “But you know the gang will want you in Connecticut,” I add.
“Least it’s close to New York,” she states with a smile. “Maybe I can design you and EJ’s dream home.”
We both burst out laughing, but hope floats at the thought that maybe she could.
Chloe rushes in with a weird look on her face with Lenna trailing after her.
“Emma’s home,” she squeals. What? “Emma came home to Anderson.” Chloe can’t contain her excitement, and it shows by the huge smile on her face.
“I thought she wasn’t going to come home for a couple of months,” Ariana questions.
“Me either,” Chloe adds. “But she texted me saying she’s back, and she and Anderson are together again.”
Oh my goodness, this is the best news ever. I’m so happy for them.
“She said she missed him terribly. That she should never have left him like she did, but she needed a couple of weeks to get her head screwed back on properly.”
“This is so amazing.” Lenna claps her hands together. “Now, we just need EJ to declare his love for Stella.” She turns and looks over at me, and I feel like a deer caught in headlights. “And then we need to find a guy for Ariana.” She points to our friend.
“Hey, leave me out of your happily-ever-after shit.” Ariana grins. “I’m happily screwing the PT for the summer.”
Her words have everyone in fits of laughter.
We spend the rest of the day lounging by the pool, popping a couple more champagne bottles, and doing a little retail therapy in the village.
“You can do it,” Ariana tells me as I stare down at my phone nervously.
“Just send her the text and see what happens,” Lenna adds.
“She will either be excited or not,” Chloe advises.
After a long while creating the perfect text to Hadley, I hit send.
Ariana hands me a shot of tequila, and I take it with my anxiety in overdrive.
About an hour later, my phone starts ringing.
“It’s Hadley,” I tell the group as I stare at the ringing phone, shock freezing me into place.
“Answer it,” Lenna yells.
Shit, she’s right, so I pick up the phone and answer.
�
�Hello.” My voice is barely a whisper.
“Stella?” Hadley’s voice comes through the phone.
“Yeah. It’s me.” My stomach turns, and I feel sick.
I watch as my friends try and cheer me on from the sidelines but very quietly.
“Wow. It’s been a long time.” Her voice stays neutral. There is no emotion.
“I know. I just…” Oh God, how the hell do I explain the reason I’ve disappeared from her life for so long? I watch as the girls get up from the daybeds and head inside, giving me some space and alone time.
“I’m so angry with you, Stella,” Hadley tells me honestly. “I lost my dad. I lost the woman who was like a second mom to me. Then my best friend packs up her life and ghosts me.” I can hear the frustration in her voice as she explains to me how my actions affected her.
“I know.” My comeback is weak, but it is the best I can do.
“You weren’t the only one grieving, Stella,” Hadley explains. “I wish I could have packed up and moved to New York, too,” she tells me. “We always said we would.”
She’s right, we both agreed on it, but only one of us did.
“I’m sorry, Had. You’re right. We promised each other we would go to the Big Apple together. We both dreamed of it.” I let out a heavy sigh. “My overwhelming grief blinded me to how others were feeling or coping.”
“You broke your family when you left, Stell,” she explains. “Your father hated himself. He blamed himself for you leaving. It was like losing another family member,” Hadley tells me. Tears begin to fall down my cheeks that I can’t keep in check. “You broke his goddamn heart, Stell.”
I break down at her words. Fuck! I was doing what was right for me with no thought of how wrong it was for everyone else.
“I’m s-sorry,” I choke on the apology.
“It’s not enough, Stell,” Hadley tells me honestly.
This isn’t the way I thought this conversation would go down.
“Your family is happy you got back in touch with them after all these years. And I know for a fact that they won’t call you out on your behavior because they don’t want to lose you ever again,” Hadley explains to me angrily. “But I have to tell you, Stell. You need to know that you broke your family when you left, and it wasn’t fucking right. It was downright selfish.”
I breakdown even further with Hadley’s home truths hitting home hard.
“I know, Had. I just didn’t know what to do at the time.” Seems like a weak-as-fuck excuse now that I have hindsight.
“I know, Stell,” her voice beings to soften. “It was a shit time all around.” She lets out a sigh. “Everyone was worried about you, that’s all.”
“I called.”
“Yeah, but not enough, though,” she replies. Tears run down my cheeks as silence falls between us. “It’s good to hear from you, though,” Hadley says softly.
“I’ve missed you so much, Had,” I tell her honestly. “So many times, I wanted to pick up the phone and call you.”
“Why didn’t you?” she asks.
“I was scared, and then so much time had passed I thought it was too late and—”
“I would have taken your call. Just like now,” she tells me. “You were a sister to me, Stell. The one person I thought I could rely on, and then you vanished.”
Goddammit, I have messed things up badly.
“I’m sorry. I truly am. I’ve made some terrible decisions over the years, thinking they were right, but I’m now beginning to see that I truly messed up.”
“We have a lot of catching up to do,” Hadley tells me.
“I know. I’ve missed so much of your life.” My heart aches thinking about all the missed years.
“And I yours,” she adds.
“Jesse, Austin, and Lacey are coming out to see me. You want to come, too?”
There’s silence as my question hangs in the air. Maybe she doesn’t want to reconnect. I wouldn’t blame her if she did. I did hurt her, after all.
“You think I’m going to say no to coming to the city. Oh, hell no.” She lets out a hearty laugh, one that takes me back to the days riding horses and checking out cowboys.
“I’m currently in The Hamptons recuperating after a car accident.”
There’s silence again before another hearty laugh. “What the hell did you just say?” She bursts out into more laughter. “Oh my God, Stella. Who the hell are you?” She giggles again. “I’m in The Hamptons recuperating from the accident. Is that a euphuism for plastic surgery? You know, like one of the housewives.” This has me laughing out loud because I forget what it’s like not to be in my world. I forget my friends are billionaires and that this isn’t everyday life.
“I had an accident in Vegas,” I try to explain to Hadley, who bursts out laughing again.
“Vegas? Did you party too hard?” She giggles.
“I wish. Unfortunately, we were celebrating the engagement of our friends, and a drunk driver hit us.”
Hadley goes quiet. “I’m sorry, Stell.”
“No. It’s fine. I have a broken leg, and I’m totally over it. Can’t do anything or go anywhere,” I moan to her.
“Sounds like we have so much to catch up on,” Hadley tells me happily.
“Yeah, we do.”
“Good. Then yes, I’ll be there with the rest of the fam.”
I let out a breath and suddenly feel lighter. “I’m excited. I can’t wait.”
After a few more minutes of chatting, we say our goodbyes, and I feel good as if everything is righting itself in the world again.
Later that night, under the moonlight, EJ came over again, and we spent our time making love under the stars.
This time a hell of a lot quieter.
37
EJ
“I’m so excited about tonight.” Chloe greets me at the front door of their holiday home. “Stella has no idea what we have planned.” She’s giddy with excitement. Little does she know Stella is fully aware of what is going to happen tonight. “You better not fuck this up.” Chloe points her finger at me.
“Hey, what does that mean?” I question my sister.
“It means you better be begging Stella to take things to the next level. You will never do any better than her,” Chloe tells me sternly.
“You might be a little biased there.” I chuckle, breaking the tension, but Chloe glares at me. She’s deadly serious.
“I mean it, Elliot.” Her blue eyes bore into mine. “She is one of my best friends, and I will not have you playing with her heart if you don’t have feelings for her.” I can see the concern etched on my sister’s face.
“Hey…” grabbing Chloe by the shoulders, “… I’m serious about Stella, Chlo. You know me, I wouldn’t be going through all this…” I wave my hands in the air, “… if I didn’t think she was worth it.”
“How serious are you?” She’s like a dog with a bone that won’t let up.
“I would like to tell Stella first before my sister.”
She waves her hand in my face. “Fine! I’ll stop being pushy.” Chloe rolls her eyes. “Now go inside and get your woman.” She pushes me through the front door.
“Hey, EJ,” Ariana calls from the living room. I hear the joy in her voice, which makes me happy. Stella told me that Ariana busted us that first night, so our cover is blown with her. “Can’t wait to see what you’re eating tonight?” She gives me a wink with her innuendo.
Honestly, I can’t deal with these girls.
“Oh, hey, EJ,” Lenna comes out and greets me. “Stell’s just freshening up. She will be out in a couple of minutes.” She then turns to the others. “That’s our cue to go,” she tells them.
They all quickly grab their stuff, each one of them wishes me luck, and then they’re out the door. I feel like the Tasmanian Devil has hit me with these women. They are all like a damn whirlwind.
“Oh, hey, you’re here.” Stella hobbles out, looking like a damn angel. She’s dressed in a white sundress, h
er blonde hair is pulled up into a high ponytail, she’s wearing minimal makeup, and no shoes. Her coconut scent hits me, and I suck in a deep breath.
“You look gorgeous,” I tell her as I walk and grab her face, then kiss her as if I’m savoring her.
“Wow. That was a nice greeting.” She looks nervously around the room.
“They’ve gone,” I tell her, and her shoulders visibly relax.
She reaches out and pulls me to her, then kisses me a little more deeply the second time.
“Now… that was a greeting.” Smiling down at her, my thumb runs across her sun-kissed cheek as I take her in. Stella is happy. Her sweet face is like damn cupid is taking a direct shot at my heart, and I’m done for. I’ve never looked at anyone and have them take my breath away. I never had someone bury themselves so deeply inside me that I feel like a part of me is missing when they aren’t around. She’s made my heart beat again, and I didn’t realize how much it had stopped beating since my parents’ death until I thought I lost her, and it started beating again. The moment I was told that Stella was involved in a car accident, the moment I saw her lying helplessly, it brought me back to the day I lost my parents. And I knew at that moment I never wanted to lose her.
“Are you okay?” Stella asks. Her blue eyes are looking over me with concern.
“I love you, Stella.”
Stella gasps at my confession.
Ordinarily, those three little words would have scared me but looking at Stella at that moment, I just can’t help myself.
Her eyes begin to well up.
“Baby, don’t cry.” My thumb wipes away the first tear that falls over her bottom lid.
“I’m overwhelmed,” she confesses.
“In a good way?”
“Yes.” She nods her head before wrapping her arms around my neck, pulling me to her as she shows me how much she loves me with her lips. Things begin to heat up, especially once her hand reaches for my dick through my jeans and he’s ready to play.
“I wanted to cook for you.” With every ounce of my being, I pull her hand away from my dick. She pouts, a little upset that she’s not getting some of it right this minute. “Let me feed you, then we can work it off,” I tell her, giving her a wink.