“I’m sorry. Please continue.” His patience was wavering; she could see it on his face, hear it in his tone.
“If you’re sure.”
“Yes, please continue.”
“Afterward I decided to quit school and concentrate on our family. He was making enough money for us to live comfortably, so I also quit my job.”
Zack kept his mouth shut, but his eyes gave away his distain.
“It wasn’t until the office Christmas party a few months later that we had the chance to take our honeymoon. I set it all up, thinking it would be a wonderful surprise. With it being the main ball room, I thought this would give us a chance to really enjoy the festivities. Did I ever tell you what I wanted to be when I graduated college?”
“A few times. You said you wanted to work with professionals as their assistant, helping them by being the go-between that enabled them to have the freedom to work unencumbered by the plights of the world surrounding them, or something like that.”
“Yes, exactly! Wow, you really have been listening.”
“Well, when it comes to you, I waited with bated breath for your next words.”
We laughed together at this. I felt more relaxed already, and since he needed to know the rest of the story, she continued.
“I went to the Christmas party with the intention of showing off my ability to work the room. I figured Randall would be pleased that the woman he’d married could handle herself, unlike the other wallflower wives that just sat in the corner. We had decided to meet at the party, since he had so much work to do. I just figured that his friends would tell him about how well I fit into their circle.”
“When he arrived and slipped an arm around my waist, I was pleased to see him smiling down at me. He came in close for what I thought would be a…”
“Why’d you stop?”
“Do I tell you about these parts? How does this work, exactly? Do you want to know all the details of when we were together?”
“Well, I don’t need to know all the details, but the picture you paint does help me understand more about how you were feeling at the time, so I guess yes, continue. But if it’s about sex, I don’t need to know unless it’s specific details about him hurting you.”
“That makes sense. Anyway, I was expecting him to lean down and kiss me, but instead he leaned in held me tighter, threatening to hurt me once we got upstairs.”
“Wait, he knew about your plan to stay and go upstairs?”
“That’s what I didn’t understand at the time. I never told him anything about my plans. In fact, I had just booked the room a few hours earlier, and we hadn’t talked before the party.”
“So, he knew about the room before you got to tell him.”
It wasn’t a question, but a statement. It was as if Zack was putting the pieces of a puzzle together, only the puzzle was my old life, and the pieces he was putting back together were me.
“We continued on with the party since we had to keep up appearances, but all the while he held me close, no one questioned it any further.” Pain coursed through my body at the memory. “It hurt, Zack. He pulled me so tight to him, and at some points he actually choked me with his arm around my neck.”
“Jesus, honey.”
He held me as though I was most precious package in the world. Realizing I could be to him, I squeezed his arm for reassurance and continued telling my tale. After a few hours recounting my horrors, I was finished.
"He never wanted a mother for his children. He wanted a servant for them. All of this was so he did exactly as he pleased.”
“My God, honey, what you went through. You were so worried when you first started telling the story that it would change my mind about you, and I’m sorry, but I have to tell you that it has.”
Crushed and defeated, I fell back against the couch, but he wouldn’t have any of it. Shaking me and forcing me to look into the bluest eyes I had ever seen, he pulled me forward as he sat on the coffee table in front me.
“You are without a doubt the bravest person…” Kiss. “Strongest person…” Kiss. “I think I ever had the privilege to know.” Kiss. “I was falling in love with you before you told me all this, and now I’m certain of it. I love you, Katelyn Elizabeth Shephard.”
“Yeah, about that…”
“What?”
“My last name isn’t actually Shephard.”
“Of course, you changed it back to your maiden name after you left that bastard.”
“Well, not really.”
“I know.”
“You know what?”
“I know it’s not your real last name.”
“How?”
She just blinked as a tear slid down her cheek.
His thumb brushed the tear away.
“I’ve known for a while that Shephard wasn’t your last name.”
“Oh, God.”
“It’s okay, Katie.” He took my hand between his much larger ones. “I understand now why you had to lie.”
There it was, the ugly word lie.
“Zack, you don’t understand.”
“I do understand.”
“Wait, how did you know it wasn’t my real last name? When did you find out?”
“I’ve known for a while now.”
“How?” I asked again.
But he just remained silent, running his hand anxiously through his hair.
“Damnit, Zack! How did you find out?”
Startled by her shouting, he blurted out the answer I didn’t want to hear but needed to, all the same.
“My security detail told me about six months ago.”
“Oh, God! I’ve got to go.”
“No, it’s okay. You explained why you did it. I understand now.”
“Who you told, exactly?”
Silence.
“Who, Zack? Who knows that Shephard isn’t my real last name?”
“Only my security detail knows, and…”
Stumbling backward, Zack suddenly realized his mistake.
“Randall. Katie, wait!”
“No! Six months! Six months Randall has known where I was, and I had no idea! Do you know what he could have done during this time? To me? To my mom? To my family?”
“It’ll be okay! We’ll figure it all out together.”
“No! Nothing is okay!”
I ran to the guest bedroom and slammed the door, then threw all the clothes she had taken to stay the weekend back into the satchel she had brought. With garments not even folded properly, the zipper wouldn’t close, and she was trying to force it by simply holding it together.
Then Zack burst through the door.
“Where are you going?!”
“I’ve got to leave right now!”
I saw him coming toward my side of the bed and decided to just leave the zipper.
“I can’t stay here.”
“Don’t go Katie. We can figure this out. Together, remember? You’re not alone anymore.”
“Shit! Did Randall ever go to your house?”
“No, he’s never been here before. I concluded my business with him a few months ago. Why?”
“Not this house, your other house. Did Randall ever spend time in that house before the fire?”
“Why yes, he did come by for a few drinks once…You don’t possibly think?”
“Why not? If you told him who I was, then he would have seen you as a threat against his plan.”
“Oh shit. Wait, my security detail…”
“Wouldn’t have known to watch his every move.”
“But the electrical fire…”
“Started in what room?”
“The office. I just assumed the old wiring couldn’t hold up.”
“Did they check the outlet to see if anyone put anything in with the plug?”
It was a thing that Randall had always worried about with his kids. That they would wrap tiny pieces of paper around the socket before plugging it into the wall. And then, when someone put the light on, a
spark would pop out as the breaker flipped. He had become obsessed with unplugging cords from walls.
“You think he burned my house down because I mentioned who you really were?”
“Did you?”
Scared and worried, she waited for his answer.
“No, I didn’t mention you to him. He may have seen your picture on my website, though.”
“What picture? I don’t remember taking a picture for your website.”
“You wouldn’t. It was from a community center function, and we were in the distance, chatting away. It was such a wonderful photo of the community coming together that I displayed it on the site for everyone to see.”
“Oh, God! Don’t you see? He burned your house down because we were talking together! He’s crazy!”
Chapter Five
“There you are, Mom!”
Exhausted from running and trying to find her, I impatiently made my way through the crowded restaurant, trying to get her attention.
“Oh, Katie! Hi! Why are you all sweaty and shaking?”
“Mom, we have to go.”
“Go? I just sat down. Justin’s in the bathroom. He should be out any minute.”
“Get your order to go, Mom. We have to leave. Grab Justin, and then let’s head to your place.”
“What’s this all about, Katie?”
Making no effort to move from her seat, Annie watched her daughter twitch with anxiety as Justin returned to the table.
“Hey Katie, are you joining us for lunch?”
He sat down in a chair with his back to the window. Patrons passed by with little concern as her mother and brother both looked up at her from their seats, menus in hand.
“We need to go. NOW!”
Her shout drew the attention of the people around them, and heads turned to witness the exchange.
“Lower your voice, please. We are in public, with people all around us,” Annie scolded me.
“I’m sorry, Mom, but Randall is here somewhere, and we need to go right now!”
“Oh honey, we told you before that this paranoia is all part of the PTSD. Maybe Justin can give you something to calm you down?”
“What? No! I don’t need to calm down!”
“Katie, there you are! Come on, we need to go.”
Zack marched suddenly toward the table, just as anxious as I was.
“Honestly! The two of you?”
“Mom!”
“Mrs. Sullivan!”
The Sullivan part had Annie standing up so abruptly that her chair fell to the floor.
“What did you just call me?”
My heart was pounding out of my chest as I watched my mom realize that Zack knew everything. I couldn’t think about anything other than getting everyone out here and somewhere safe.
“Zackary Collins, you tell me right now what is going on!”
Justin stood up, too, gaping at Zack. Eventually we all made our way toward the door. Zack pulled me into a hug and kissed me senseless.
“Don’t you ever do that to me again,” he whispered in my ear. “I swear you scared the living daylights out of me. I think I must have aged ten years trying to find you.”
Kissing me as if it would be our last encounter, Zack took everything I had and demanded more. I was so lost in the feel of his lips that I didn’t even realize that he’d moved us to his awaiting car. Then he guided me inside as the others made their way to their own vehicles, with instructions to follow us back to Zack’s place.
“You just don’t get it, do you?”
I watched the trees passing us, then I turned in my seat to face him, confused by his out-of-the-blue question.
“Get what?”
He took my hand in both of his and pulled just enough so that our thighs touched.
“When I said that we are together, I meant it, with every fiber of my being. It may take you a bit longer to catch up with me, but we are in this…whatever it is—together. I don’t want to be on the sidelines while you deal with this without me. I don’t have it in me to just watch as you go through something so monumental that it may change everything for you, and maybe for us. I know this sounds crazy to you, but I have never experienced anything so profound in all my life.”
Then he placed my hand on his chest and I could feel his heart pounding. I gasped at the sensation.
“I’m so sorry, Zack. I do need to catch up. I just don’t know how to be in a good relationship after…”
“Shush. You know what the greatest part about being together is?”
“What’s that?’
“That we both feel the same about one another. We can make it, as long as we are both willing to do the work and try. I can show you how much I love you, and you can show me right back. I know how to love, I’ve seen my parents and grandparents do it all my life. The respect they have for one another is so profound that it carries over to all those around them. I know I love you, Katie. How you feel for me I’m not so sure of, but I do know that I love you.”
Tears streamed down my cheeks at his declaration. How I’d found this wonderful man, I had no idea, but maybe fate had finally given me the one person I could open my heart to completely. But did I love him? I knew I had never felt for anyone the way I did for him. I knew that when he entered a room, my world righted itself just from his presence. I could actually feel him without even knowing he had entered a room, our connection was so strong, and when he kissed me, my whole body hummed with tingling sensations that reached all the way down to the tips of my toes.
"That’s love, baby.”
“Oh, Zack.”
I cried as I launched myself into his arms, not caring we were still in the car with his security detail in the front. He held me so tight I could barely breathe, but all I felt was the sensation of security being in his arms provided.
“I love you too, Zack. We may not have been dating long, but we have been dancing around the idea of us for years. How could I not love you? You’ve been everything I ever wanted.”
He kissed my eyelids, then the tip of my nose, finally putting his lips against mine, sealing our fate to whatever struggles lay ahead. But we were together now.
***
Walking through the door, we were immediately blasted with the sounds of my brother and mother talking at one another at the same time. As soon as they saw me, they directed their attention and inquisitive questions at me at a feverish pitch. My arms flew about as I screamed right back at them. Normally we were so civilized. Out of the corner of my eye, I could see Zack just watching from the sidelines, unsure when he should step into the conversation—or yelling match.
“How could you tell him? It’s not just your life that’s at stake, Katie!”
I’ve never seen my mom so livid.
“What about the rest of the family? Did you even consider them when you told him? What’s wrong with you, Katie?”
Justin’s face was so red that I was more worried he would have a heart attack than about anything he was saying to me.
“I didn’t tell him anything!”
I couldn’t just stand by and let my family think that I’d ruined everything we’d built. Everything we’d sacrificed to build.
“Now hold on, everybody.”
Zack bless his heart, was always attempting to bring peace into our chaos, but this time, no one would have it.
As my mom and I continued yelling at one another, Justin expelled several breaths, regaining his composure. Then he sat on a stool, arms against the counter, his head in his hands. When he looked my way, his attitude changed and he bolted from his seat, charging at me rather quickly. So quickly I dug my heels into the floor to stand my ground, unsure what would happen next.
Seeing my discomfort, Zack stood, too, and hurried to my side, not willing to let anything or anyone hurt me. He was my rock now, and I was so happy we had a chance to be together, for however long we were allowed.
“Damn Katie, your bandage is soaked with blood.”
H
e grabbed my arm to inspect the damage, but Zack quickly pushed his hand away and lifted me into his arms, carrying me to the nearby couch.
“That’s it!”
Livid was not strong enough a word to describe the look on Zack’s face. Angry wasn’t, either. He was pissed as hell.
“Baby, why didn’t you say something?”
“I just didn’t feel anything. I guess I bumped it against the counter when we were all talking.”
“Yelling, Katie. That wasn’t talking, that was yelling, and I hope you all got it out of your system, because I won’t let anyone hurt you. Not even yourself.”
Justin was so shocked at the exchange playing out before him that he just stared at us. I was in Zack’s lap as he cradled my arm.
Oh yeah. We hadn’t got a chance to tell him that we were together. Everything had happened so fast, and I didn’t realize that he’d had no idea…
Taking a few careful steps in our direction, Justin made his way toward us. Since he was a doctor, inspecting the wound was his top priority. All other questions and concerns could wait until he made sure I was okay. Zack, however, would have none of it. I didn’t even think he realized he was giving the death stare and hissing as Justin approached.
“I’m sorry, Zack. This is your house, and we just barged in screaming our heads off at one another. You must think we are all a bunch of crazy lunatics, but Katie’s hurt and I need to check and make sure she didn’t pop any stitches.”
He kept advancing slowly, talking softly as to not startle Zack even further. Justin seemed to understand how protective Zack was of me, and I was awestruck at how lucky I was to have two such amazing men in my life.
“Sorry, Justin, but I can’t let you do that until you calm down. I won’t let anyone hurt her, not even you.”
“Damn, bro, I didn’t realize…”
He paused to take a cleansing breath before continuing, then looked over at our mom, whose smile was so big it seemed as if happiness was pouring right out of her.
“I’ve wanted to be with your sister for a long time. Yesterday we were finally able to talk about it, and we’ve decided to give it a shot.”
Zack filled everyone in while we waited for Justin to relax enough to tend to my injury.
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