Whoops! All The Money Went Missing (A Susan Hall Mystery Book 2)

by Adele Abbott

  “What’s going on in there?”

  “What do you mean?”

  “I heard voices and laughter.”

  “I—err—was—err just watching the TV.”

  Charlie saw Greta roll her eyes.

  “Are you sure there isn’t anyone else in there?” He pressed.

  “Take a look, if you don’t believe me.”

  Short of actually picking up the miniature thimble house, there was no easy way for Charlie to check, but he had a sneaking suspicion that Biddy might have moved in.

  “Okay, well, just keep it down, will you?”

  “Of course, Charlie. Your wish is my command.”

  He would need to keep an eye on that situation.

  Charlie wasn’t the only flatmate to have been woken prematurely, but it wasn’t the sound of raucous fairies which had disturbed Neil; it was the sound of passion.

  Socky was standing at the foot of Neil’s bed. The ghost looked as though he was kissing and embracing someone, but whoever it was, was not visible to Neil.

  “Socky—err—Tobias! What are you doing?”

  Socky stopped kissing, and released his embrace. “Good morning, young sir. Allow me to introduce Lady Arabella Markham.” He pointed to the empty space next to him.

  “I can’t see anyone. Only you.”

  “Of course. How remiss of me. Bella, attach yourself to this young man, would you?”

  Moments later, the ghostly shape of an attractive woman, wearing a long white dress, appeared next to Socky.

  “I’m pleased to make your acquaintance, young man. Tobias has told me a lot about you.”

  “It’s nice to meet you too, Lady Markham.”

  “You must call me Bella. We’re all friends here.”

  Socky put his arm around her. “When she was alive, Bella lived in the stately home at Chipping West.”

  “I think I know the one,” Neil said. “But don’t you mean West Chipping?”

  “I believe that’s what they call it nowadays, but back in our day it was Chipping West. We were something of an item back in the day, weren’t we, Bella?”

  “We were Tobias. Heady days, those were.”

  “We lost touch.” Socky sighed. “But, then we bumped into each other in Ghost Town when I was forced to take refuge there for a while.”

  “That’s very—” Neil said. “Tobias, do you think I could have a word in private.”

  “I should be going, anyway.” Bella gave Socky a quick peck on the cheek. “Until later, my love.”

  “What is it?” Socky asked, after his lady friend had disappeared.

  “She can’t stay here. It’s bad enough having you hobbling around the place.”

  “Fear not, my friend. Bella spends most of her time in her old home, in Chipping West. In fact, I’m hoping to spend some time there myself.”

  “That does sound like an awfully good idea.”

  ***

  An hour later, Susan, Charlie and Neil were in the lounge, each of them preoccupied with their own thoughts.

  That evening was to be Charlie’s first date with Amelia. Surprisingly, though, it wasn’t Amelia who he was thinking about. It was Jade, the model he’d worked with on his first photoshoot. She was pretty, and so very charming. Charlie had never dated a human, but then he’d never really dated anyone—not for any length of time.

  Neil was nervous about his appointment at ‘Real Magic’. He’d called them the previous evening, and they’d asked him to pop in for an initial chat that afternoon.

  Susan was contemplating her busy day ahead. She’d arranged to meet Greg for lunch, and then in the evening she was going out with Dreams and Jess. Susan planned to take a taxi to meet up with her friends because, if she knew Jess, the drinks would be flowing quite freely. It was ages since the three of them had been on a ‘girls’ night’. Maybe she’d be able to persuade Dreams to dump that loser Ryan. Or, maybe, she should just keep her nose out? The other thing still playing on Susan’s mind was Dorothy.

  “Hey, guys, I know you two think I’m being silly, but I do think we need to talk about Dorothy’s drinking.”

  “There’s nothing to worry about,” Neil said.

  “You say that, but I’ve seen her with a glass of wine first thing in the morning, and then just now, before you two got up, she had blood running down her chin. I think she may have been drunk, fallen over and hit her head.”

  “I’m sure there’s nothing to worry about,” Charlie said. “But, if you like, I’ll have a word with her.”

  “Would you? That would be great. It would be better coming from you. She won’t listen to anything I have to say.”

  ***

  It was Molly’s day off, so it would be just Dorothy and Grace running the shop today. Grace, their ‘Saturday Girl’, still attended school, and although she was nice enough, she sometimes did Dorothy’s head in. All she wanted to do was talk about boys, clothes and Facebook. If Dorothy was going to survive the day, she needed a bacon roll.

  “Morning, Dot!” Donny called, as soon as she walked into Sarnies, which was much quieter than in the week.

  “I’ve told you. It’s Dorothy. Can I get a bacon roll, please?”

  “Ketchup?”

  “No, thanks.”

  “Where’s Moll?”

  “It’s her day off.” Dorothy handed him the cash.

  As she watched him place slices of bacon onto the bread roll, she wondered where he managed to buy such horrible shirts. Today’s monstrosity had cartoon animals on it.

  “There you go, Dot.” He passed her the roll.

  That’s when she spotted it.

  “You’ve lost a button.” She pointed. “Off your cuff.”

  “Yeah.” He shrugged. “I don’t know where it went.”

  “I do! I found it on the floor in the bookshop.”

  His face fell. “Oh—err—I—”

  “It was you!”

  “What are you talking about?” He tried to force a smile, but it was far from convincing.

  “You’re the one who’s been breaking into the bookshop in the night!”

  “I wouldn’t exactly call it ‘breaking in’.”

  “I think the police would. We’ll see, shall we?”

  “No, please! There’s no need for that. It was just a bit of fun.”

  “Is that what you call it? Messing around with the stock? Scaring Molly and me half to death?”

  “I’m sorry. I never intended to do that.”

  “If you do it again, I’ll get the police onto you.” She started for the door.

  “I’m really sorry, Dot!” he called after her. “Did you read what the book titles spelled out? I meant those words.”

  Grace was waiting for her outside the bookshop.

  “Are you okay, Dorothy? You look really angry.”

  “I’m fine.” She unlocked the door. “Come on, let’s get to work.”

  While Grace hung up her coat, Dorothy stared at the top shelf of the Crime section, which Donny had obviously rearranged overnight.

  “What’s happened there?” Grace said.

  “It’s nothing.”

  But was it? Donny had said he meant the words he’d spelled out. What was she supposed to make of that?

  ***

  Susan had spent way too much time deciding what to wear for her lunch date with Greg. Date? Was it really a date? Of course not. Not a ‘date’ date. In the end, she went with a simple blue dress.

  The Washbridge Lounge had only opened a couple of years earlier, and this was Susan’s first visit. It was quite an impressive place except for the water feature in the centre of the room. It seemed to Susan that the budget must have run out at that point, and they had been forced to pick up a cheap, plastic monstrosity from a local garden centre.

  When she spotted Greg, she was relieved that she hadn’t gone for anything more elaborate. He was wearing jeans and a smart blue shirt. He looked good; he looked very good.

  He greeted her wit
h a kiss on the cheek, and then led the way to a table by the window.

  “I’ll just have the Caesar salad,” Susan said, after studying the menu.

  “I think I’ll have the same. I don’t like anything too heavy at lunchtime. What would you like to drink?”

  “Just a soda water, please. I’m driving, and I’m going out tonight.”

  Greg called the waiter over and gave him their order.

  “Are you seeing your boyfriend tonight?” he said.

  “No. I’m not seeing anyone at the moment. I’m going out with a couple of girlfriends. It’s ages since we had a night out together.”

  After a few minutes’ small talk, their meals and drinks arrived.

  “This is nice.” Greg nodded his approval. “I feel bad about intruding on your weekend.”

  “That’s okay. I wasn’t doing anything in particular today.”

  “I’m really keen to investigate the ‘missing’ husbands a little further. I’d love it if you and I could somehow join forces on this one.

  “I’d like that too. It is quite intriguing.”

  “I realise, of course, that you don’t buy into the paranormal aspect, but I’d like to think I’ll be able to change your mind.”

  “I doubt that.” She laughed, and decided it was probably best not to tell him about the two stories she was working on. One of which had involved cash which had supposedly disappeared from a bank, and the other, a murder, which according to an eye-witness had apparently been committed by some kind of werewolf-like creature. “What does your girlfriend think of all this paranormal stuff?”

  “I’m not seeing anyone at the moment either.”

  Chapter 17

  The offices of Real Magic were above a karaoke bar, not far from Coffee Triangle.

  “Have a seat, Neil. I’m Selena Wild. Real Magic is my baby.”

  Selena was considerably older than she’d sounded on the phone, but then Neil had always found it difficult to put an age on witches.

  “Trevor tells me that you’re interested in joining us?”

  “I think so. He told me about some of what you do. It sounds interesting.”

  “And well paid. I assume he mentioned that, too?”

  “He certainly seems to be doing well for himself.”

  “I should start by warning you that this is not an easy gig. If that’s what you’re hoping for, you’re in the wrong place.”

  “I understand.”

  “And, there are certain risks that come with the job too.”

  “Rogue retrievers?”

  “That’s right. I don’t need to tell you that the use of magic in front of humans is not allowed.” She hesitated. “Officially, at least. The retrievers will only get involved if you use magic in such a way as to draw unnecessary attention to yourself. To avoid that we do two things. We pick our customers very carefully. Small private parties for the children of the wealthy are fine. As are corporate events. Anything bigger than that is asking for trouble. And, of course, we insist that the act must look like it could have been performed by a human magician. It’s a difficult balancing act. On the one hand, it must have the ‘wow’ factor, but on the other, it must not be so sensational as to appear to be ‘real’ magic. Does that all make sense?”

  “Perfect.”

  “Good. We have more demand than we can service, but that is partially because I am very particular about who I take on. I reject nine out of ten applicants for a variety of reasons. Some are simply not good enough; they do not have the requisite skills to put on the type of performance we expect. Others are too good, and feel the need to show off their abilities to the extent that it’s quite obvious that real magic is being employed. And then there are those whose personalities aren’t a good match. We need you to be outgoing without being over the top.” She gave him a few moments to absorb it all, and then asked, “Thoughts?”

  “It sounds exciting.”

  “You’re still interested after everything you’ve just heard?”

  “Definitely.”

  “Good. In that case, I’ll need you to do two things. First, you should go and see one of Trevor’s shows, to get a feel for what is required. Trevor is one of my best performers. Second, you need to put together your own act. When you feel you’re ready, I’ll ask you to come in to do a formal audition. If that all works out, I can start to book you some gigs. Okay?”

  “Yeah.”

  She stood up to indicate that the meeting was over. “Thanks for coming in. I’ll get Trevor to contact you.”

  When Neil was back outside, he reflected on everything Selena Wild had said. He’d assumed he only had to turn up to be taken on, but it would be a lot more difficult than that. Even so, he was determined to give it a go.

  ***

  Dorothy was locking up; Grace had already left. It had been a long, tedious day. If Grace had mentioned Facebook one more time, Dorothy would have screamed.

  “Have you finished?”

  Dorothy jumped at Donny’s voice.

  “What are you playing at, creeping up on me like that?”

  “Sorry, Dot.”

  “And if you call me Dot again, I’ll kick you where it hurts. Hard!”

  “Sorry, Dorothy.” He took a step back.

  “What do you want?”

  “Just to apologise for the book thing. It was only meant to be a bit of fun.”

  “Okay, so now you’ve apologised.”

  “And to ask if you’d come out with me one night?”

  “With you?” She laughed.

  “Yeah. Why not?”

  “Because I’d rather poke my eyes out with a red hot poker.”

  “I can see you’re on the fence about it.”

  “There’s no fence involved. The answer is no.” With that, she began to walk away.

  “I’m going to keep asking until you say ‘yes’.”

  Dorothy just kept on walking. Donny couldn’t see the huge smile on her face.

  ***

  “Are you sure you want to go to the movies, Charlie?” Amelia said. “We could always stay in at my place. I have wine, and I’m sure we’d find some way to amuse ourselves.” She pinched his backside.

  “Maybe next time.” The thought of being alone with Amelia terrified Charlie. “I’d quite like to see this movie. I’ve been looking forward to it for ages.”

  “Okay.” She sighed. “What’s it called again?”

  “Err—it’s—err—something to do with a pirate.”

  “Enjoy yourselves,” Neil called after them. “Don’t do anything I would, Charlie.”

  “He fancies himself, your friend, doesn’t he?” she said, once they were outside.

  “Neil’s okay. I’m surprised he isn’t going out though. It’s not like him to stay in on a Saturday night.”

  ***

  “I thought you said this movie was about pirates.” Amelia was making an inordinate amount of noise eating a giant tub of popcorn.

  “I must have misheard.”

  “I don’t think that parrot is funny.”

  The movie was dire. Parrots of the Aegean had been billed as a comedy, but so far no one in the audience was laughing.

  “I need to pee,” Amelia announced to the whole auditorium. “Hold this.” She passed him the half full tub of popcorn.

  This wasn’t going well, and there was still another hour to go. Afterwards, he’d have to find some excuse not to go back to her place.

  “Hey, gorgeous.”

  It took Charlie a few seconds to realise the comment was directed at him. Seated in the row in front were two pretty young women—both humans.

  “Hi.” Charlie smiled.

  “What do you think of the movie?” the brunette said.

  “It’s okay.”

  “It’s terrible,” the blonde said. “Why don’t you come for a drink with us instead?”

  “I’m with someone.”

  “It doesn’t look like you want to be. She’s a bit of a mare, isn’
t she?”

  “What’s going on here?” Amelia was back.

  “Nothing,” Charlie spluttered.

  “Your boyfriend’s sick of listening to you crunch on popcorn,” the brunette said.

  “Is he now? And what’s that got to do with you two?”

  “He’s going to come for a drink with us, aren’t you, gorgeous?”

  “What’s going on, Charlie?” Amelia turned on him.

  “Nothing. I didn’t say I’d go with them.”

  “Right!” Amelia turned to face the two women, and cast a spell, turning them both into mice.

  “You can’t do that!” Charlie protested.

  “I just did. Don’t worry. It’ll wear off in an hour.”

  When the movie eventually ended, Charlie took special care where he put his feet, as he walked up the aisle towards the exit. He didn’t want to risk squashing the mice.

  “You shouldn’t have done that, Amelia,” he said, once they were outside.

  “No woman messes with my man, and gets away with it.”

  Her man? Was that what he was?

  “What now, Charlie?” Amelia said. “Do you fancy going back to my place?”

  “I think I’m coming down with something. I feel like I might be sick. I’d better get back home.”

  ***

  What a night! It had just turned midnight, and the women were still going strong. Or at least, Dreams and Jess were; Susan was dead on her feet. They’d started off with a tour of several bars before ending up in Club Max just after eleven o’ clock. Since then, they’d barely stopped dancing. Susan wasn’t a great dancer, and would normally try to avoid it at all costs, but the other two wouldn’t give her a break. Jess was being her usual loud self, but it was Dreams who had really surprised Susan. She’d quite clearly been kept on Ryan’s leash for so long that this night of freedom had gone to her head.

  “I’m gonna dump him!” Dreams shouted at the top of her voice. “Ryan is a loser.”

  Although Susan fully endorsed that sentiment, she wasn’t sure Dreams would go through with it when she woke in the morning.

  The morning? Susan didn’t want to think about that. She was going to have the mother of all hangovers.