by RaeLynn Fry
“I’m here to save my brother,” I say.
“He’s the one who made him sick!” Ethan points an accusing finger at the composed man in the chair by the fire.
Akin looks more than pleased at what’s unfolding between us. “My father has no intention of curing Ajna. Why would he do that?”
I refuse to believe what he says. “The Corporation has what I need.”
“At the cost of life-long servitude!”
“I don’t expect you to understand, Ethan.” His name, which once felt so comfortable in my mouth, is now bitter and foreign.
“There’s always another way.”
“Not this time,” I say. I rise out of the chair. “Akin, we have a deal. Just save Ajna.”
“No!” Ethan grabs my arm, but I jerk out of his grasp. The ink from my Mark smears along my arm and stains his fingers. He looks down at it with horrified confusion.
“Don’t. Touch. Me.”
“Don’t worry, son,” Akin says. “Soon you’ll get to see her every day. Reminded each hour of how much she despises you.”
Ethan looks at me, and I know there’s nothing in my face to refute Akin’s words.
“Let me explain,” he says.
My heart hardens against the sorrow in his eyes. “Don’t ever talk to me again.” I turn and walk with measured composure across the room. My hands shake and the adrenaline pumps fast and hard through my blood.
Once I’m out of the room, I can’t fake it anymore. I hurry down the stairs and try not to run across the foyer. The four Guards swarm on me in an instant, blocking my path.
“Let me through.” I try to push by, but they grab my arms, yanking them behind my back. I let out a cry of pain.
“Mr. Hughes didn’t say you could leave yet.”
“What’s going on here?” a new voice says.
The closed door off the foyer opens, and a woman with dark hair and a cream suit stands in the doorway. I vaguely recognize her, but with my mind as unreliable as it anymore, I can’t be certain. She could just be someone I’ve seen at the Market or the party. The woman takes a step forward, shock on her face.
“What’s going on?” she repeats, reaching for me.
I shy away, the Guards getting a better grip. “Let me go,” I say, pulling.
“Is this really necessary?” the woman says in irritation.
“Stop fighting,” the Guard barks at me.
“It’s okay,” Ethan says. The guard spins us around. “Let her go.” Ethan stands at the landing at the top of the stairs, his father beside him.
The Guard drops my arms, and the others part to let me pass. “Of course, Mr. Hughes.”
I run out the front door and don’t look back.
७
Inside, I want to scream.
I want to yell and shout until my throat is raw and until I’ve woken every citizen in both cities.
Akin is Ethan's father. Ethan is his son.
How could I not have known? Was I so blind that I ignored the obvious signs? Everything’s been a lie.
I'm trying hard not to cry. I feel so betrayed and hurt. So impossibly hurt. The sting and pain of my Mark was nothing compared to the pain I'm feeling now. It's a scraping deep down, a dull blade being used to dig out my heart.
I take a breath, count to five, and slowly release it. I do this five or six times, calming my beating heart and setting my mind on a straight path. First things first, I have to get to Ella's, grab some things, and leave for the Outer City. Until Akin delivers the medicine, I need to be with my brother.
Even though I've done my best to shove down the tears, a few escape and roll down my cheeks. My vision is blurry, but I push forward, through the streets. The sun will be up soon, I think distractedly. Another day. By then I will be back in Neech with my brother.
Day eight
Twenty-five
The hour is early, maybe one or two in the morning, by the time I fling myself through the door of Ella’s house. It swings back and bangs against the wall before I slam it shut. I don’t bother trying to stop the tears.
“Karis? Ethan?” Ella steps out of the sitting room, blocking the hallway. She takes one look at me, and alarm rises in her eyes. “Karis, what's wrong?” She looks past me. “Where’s Ethan?”
I squeeze past her and pound up the stairs and into the bathroom. I slam the door and rip off my clothes, throwing them into the corner. They’re covered in blood from earlier and smell like the sewer, and I don’t want anything that was near Ethan touching my skin. I rip off the newer bandages, already soaked through with blood.
I drop against the wall, naked, and slide down, drawing my knees into my chest. I wrap my arms around my legs and hug myself so tight, I can hardly fill my lungs with air. I bury my face in my arms, body convulsing with sobs.
There's a soft knock on the door. “Karis? Can I come in?” I don't answer. The door opens. “Are you okay?”
I look up at her with what I know are red, swollen, and entirely pathetic eyes. She steps into the room and drops to my side, wrapping her arms around my shoulders. I fall into her chest where she lets me cry until I don't have any more tears to give.
“He lied to me, Ella. About everything,” I say when I trust myself to speak again.
“Shhh,” she soothes. “Let me draw you a bath, then we’ll talk.” I nod into her neck. She gives me a brief squeeze before standing. A torrent of water hits the tub like a mini waterfall. I watch her graceful movements as she enriches the water with salts and oils, as if she’s performing a ritual. The air clouds with eucalyptus and lavender carried on heavy steam. Suds crowd the surface of the water. She takes my hands and inspects the raw wounds.
“I’ll get some more ointment. Get into the bath. I'll take care of these.” Ella picks up my pile of soiled clothes without hesitation and leaves the room, shutting the door behind her.
I slip into the tub, the warm water easing my pain only slightly, the stinging of my hands disturbingly welcome.
I submerge my body and stay beneath the water until my lungs are on fire. When I come up for air, I leave my tears behind in the water where they belong. I will not cry over Ethan Hughes again, I promise myself. This betrayal is too great to be softened by tears.
Ella slips back into the room and sits on the edge of the tub, handing me a sponge. She lathers shampoo between her hands, massaging it into my hair and scalp. “Now, tell me what happened.”
“I knew you wouldn’t be able to finish the medicine.” She doesn’t react to what I say, so I keep going, “Akin knows I’m here. He knows I’m from Neech, and he knows about my family. He knows I’m here, with you.”
Her fingers freeze for a second. “Are you sure?”
“I went for a walk early yesterday morning—you were still sleeping—and he found me. He said he knew all about me and my brother. He knows Ajna’s dying and he said that unless I came to work for the Corporation, he’d make sure I wouldn’t get the medicine I needed. When you said you couldn’t get the last ingredient, I knew Akin had made his move. I had no choice, Ella.”
“Why didn’t you say something sooner?”
I twist in the tub, and water sloshes up the sides. “This was something I had to do on my own. I’ve been so stupid to think this wasn’t dangerous. I couldn’t involve you and Ethan any more than I already had.”
She nods and gently turns my head back around. Filling a cup with water, she pours it over my hair, shielding my face. “I’ve been fighting the Corporation for a long time, Karis. I appreciate your concern, but this is nothing new for me. Now, tell me what happened between you and Ethan.”
I expect grief to come, but it doesn't, only a dark, hot cloud. “I went to Akin’s tonight to tell him I’d take the deal, that I’d work for the Corporation in exchange for the medicine. We were going over details when Ethan came in. He lied to me, Ella. Ethan said he was helping me, but he wasn't.”
“How so?” She begins massaging sweet smelling oil in my hair t
o smooth the tangles.
“He's Akin Hughe's son!” I splash the water. “He never told me that.”
“If he had, would it have changed things?”
“Yes. No. I don't know. But at least I would have known the truth from the start.”
“Ah,” she says softly. “Like the truth you're keeping from him about your Mark?”
“That's different,” I say quietly.
“How?”
“It affects me, not him. Besides, he wouldn’t care.”
“Don’t plead ignorance, Karis. I know you’ve seen the way he looks at you. And his relationship with his father affects only him, not you.”
“It does affect me!” I protest. Even though I’m convinced my thoughts and feelings are valid, I can't help but feel I'm acting like a spoiled brat.
“Did being Akin Hughe's son stop him from sneaking into Neech every night to pass out those bulletins? Or get you in contact with me? Or break into the Corporation to get what you needed?”
I don't say anything. She's right. Being Akin's son doesn’t change who he is. A friend. But I choose to hang onto my anger about the lies for a little longer.
“Did Akin give you the medicine?” I can hear the hope in her voice.
“No. He said he’d only give Ajna the medicine a month at a time. But Ethan told me his father has no intention of keeping that promise.”
“This isn’t the end, Karis. We’ll think of something else. We’ll get the medicine for your brother.”
She’s right, I will. Because Akin wants me too much to break our deal. I swirl the bubbles on the water’s surface with my finger. “Why didn’t you tell me about Ethan?”
“I don’t see how that would’ve mattered,” Ella says. “Besides, Ethan asked me not to.”
“Why didn't he tell me?”
She holds up a towel for me to dry off on. I smell like flowers. I step into the thick soft material, and she wraps it around me, kissing me on the forehead. “Because he was afraid of what you’d think of him. He was afraid you wouldn't give him the chance he deserves.”
“He's probably right,” I admit.
She holds me gently by the shoulders. “We don't choose the families or the lives we're born into; it's what we do with them that we have any control over, and that make us who we are.”
“You sound like my papa.” My heart pangs.
She smiles. “A man of wisdom and good sense. Those are hard to find and good to hold onto. Ethan’s a man like that.”
“I'm leaving tonight.” I meet her warm eyes, and it hurts me to see them fill with sorrow. “I need to go home and spend the rest of my time with Ajna. I can’t handle seeing Ethan right now.”
She nods slowly but looks disappointed. “I understand. Go change, I'll pack you some food. Do you have a plan to get out of the city?”
“The same way I came in,” I say. “Through the front door.”
७
I've changed into some clean clothes and am in the process of putting my damp hair into a braid when I hear the door downstairs slam. My body freezes. I thought for sure I’d have enough time to get things together and leave. I didn’t really expect him to come back.
Ethan’s voice carries up the stairs. “Is she here?”
“This isn’t a good time, Ethan,” Ella says. Her voice is firm, and I'm grateful for her protective nature for those she cares about.
“I need a minute. Just give me one minute alone with her.”
“I said, now isn’t a good time. Ethan!”
His feet thunder up the stairs. I force myself to stay calm and even. I'm pulling a sweater over my head when he throws open the door, bursting into the room, slamming it closed behind him.
“What are you doing?” he asks breathlessly.
“Leaving.” I close my eyes and think of Ajna, pale and thin and dying on the floor in front of the fire, before turning around to make eye contact. I know there’s something harsh in my eyes, because he takes a step back.
“About earlier...” he trails off.
“Oh, you mean when I found out you were Akin Hughe's son?”
I can tell he's uncomfortable. His weight shifts from foot to foot; his hands won't stay still, moving from his pockets to his hair to his hips, then crossing. They repeat the pattern, and I find myself disturbingly satisfied with his discomfort. It's a small price to pay.
“I was going to tell you,” he says at last.
I'm surprised at how calm and level I'm able to keep my voice. “Oh, really? When exactly?” I step closer, and he swallows. I don't think he's prepared for a confrontation with me.
“Soon. After all this.”
“After all what, Ethan?” My voice is sweet but my emotion is deadly.
“After getting what we needed from the Corporation.”
“From your father,” I clarify.
“Yes, from my father, but it's not what you think.”
“What is it, then?”
“I hate my father. More than anything. I've been fighting against him ever since I knew what the Corporation was doing.”
“And when was that?”
“The year after my Jatis. I found out the Corporation’s been stacking the deck, rigging the ceremonies, making sure they have the right number of whatever they’re lacking. Everything that happens in our lives—in the cities—is a political power move. Nothing is ever chance.” He’s disgusted by the word. “Everything is part of the Corporation's carefully articulated and laid out plan. I found out Akin was getting rid of anyone trying to churn the water. Like Kavin. Like you. There’s so much I need
to tell you, Karis. That I should’ve told you from the beginning.”
“What do you mean, like Kavin and me?”
“The faulty tattoos. My father planted Bak in the Black Market and taught him how to give them. Citizens brazen enough to try to take what my father refuses to give them are dangerous enough to be a threat. It’s an easy justification. I just didn’t realize how many there were.”
“But they're people!” I yell, taking a step closer. I picture Kavin’s drooling face and his family being Released. If I’d any tears left, I'd cry right now, but I’m empty, and the only product left is anger. “Entire families are ruined because of that man!”
“I know, Karis. I know! My life’s one of them. Why do you think I've been doing what I've been doing? I'm trying to get the truth to the people so we can stand up and fight for our lives and for what’s due us!” He rakes his hand through his hair in frustration. “We deserve to decide our own paths, not a corporation who puts random values to our worth.”
The emotion is thick on both sides of the room. We’re angry at the Corporation and frustrated with each other. But I still can’t help but feel that some of this is his fault.
“Did you know about me?” I say.
“What?” My question knocked him off guard. “Why would you ask that?”
“Did you know who I was before we met at the Jatis?”
“I…” It’s in his eyes. The lie he’s about to tell.
“You did! You knew me! This is all a lie!”
“I knew of you, Karis. Only the fact that my father had a particular interest in you. He had your name written down. A file. That’s it. I didn’t know why. I still don’t. But I’m not a part of this. We need to stick together. The Corporation only has a hold on Neech and Dahn. We can stop it. My father can be brought down,” Ethan says.
“Stop talking about other cities. There’s nothing in the Further!”
“There is, Karis!” he yells back at me. There's fire in his eyes, and it's somewhat satisfying to know I’m the cause. “I found out a while ago that the Corporation’s been sending Guards out into the Further to survey and appraise other cities, estimating their strengths and weaknesses. The Corporation’s planning on extending its reach, and that can’t happen.”
“I need to get to my brother,” I say, pushing past him to the dresser. He grabs my shoulders and spins me around.
I glower at him.
“What is it?” he asks. “What’s really making you so angry?”
“You lied to me!” I yell. “You made me think you cared about me, that we were fighting against the same thing, and this whole time, I was fighting against you!”
“Being Akin's son doesn't change anything. We're both fighting against the Corporation.” He's trying to keep his temper in check.
“You are the Corporation!” I'm trying to keep as composed as Ethan is, but my emotions are so hot right now, I couldn't keep my voice level if my life depended on it.
“That's where you're wrong, Karis. My father’s the Corporation, not me. Never have been, never will be. Why do you think I've been doing those newsletters? To give the Outer City hope—to try to make them see the truth about what's going on. If we don’t fight back, the Corporation will own everything.” He lets go and turns around, hands on his hips.
I take a few calming breaths and feel my blood come down from a boil to a slow simmer. “They own everything already,” I say.
“Only because we don’t think there’s another possibility. We can still choose.”
“Choose what? We can't do anything without these blasted Marks, and even those they've picked for us.”
“We can choose to leave.” He turns back around to face me, the fire in his eyes still there. “You deserve more than what they’ve given you. You deserve a life you can spend with someone who cares about you. Someone you could love. I didn’t think you’d be one to give up just like that.”
“I’m not giving up, and my Pair’s gone, remember? He’s been Released.”
“I’m not talking about your Pair, Karis. God, you can be so blind and stubborn sometimes.” He runs his hands through his hair again. “I’m talking about me. Leave with me.”
“Leave and go where exactly?” I scoff.
“The Further.”
I can't contain the sharp laugh that escapes. “The Further? You mean the place your father sends people to die a slow and horrible death?”
“There are other cities out there, Karis. Cities beyond the Corporation's control where we can live the lives we choose. We can take Ella and your family, make new lives for ourselves. I’ve seen the reports.”