The Bitter Price Of Love

by Amanda Browning

  Her first thought was that Hunter couldn’t possibly live here, but she decided she had better go and make sure. There was a veranda built on to the side facing the sea, and it groaned pitifully as she stepped up on to it. Automatically she froze, expecting someone to call out, then uttered a nervous laugh as she realised how foolish that was. There was nobody around to hear! Walking forward, she noticed that the door stood open and, biting her lip, she went to look inside. The first and only thing her eye alighted on was a table on which stood a kerosene lamp, a half-empty bottle of whisky and a book. There was probably more to see, but her surprise at finding signs of habitation was turned to shock when a voice spoke from behind her.

  ‘Looking for something?’ it enquired mockingly, and Reba screamed.

  ‘You got a good pair of lungs, Reba. Pity there’s no one but me around to hear them,’ the same unforgettable voice declared, and in seconds the shock had been replaced by a tingling awareness as the hairs on the back of her neck rose.

  Knowing whom she would see when she turned didn’t at all prepare her for the sight which met her eyes. Hunter stood at the foot of the rickety steps, staring up at her. He wore the same jeans as he had last night, but that was all. His feet were bare and so was his impressive chest. There were droplets of moisture on the tanned expanse of skin, and the slicked-back darkness of his hair told her he must just have come from a dip in the sea. The thought didn’t help.

  ‘Hunter.’ His name was a torture and a delight, hovering between a gasp and a groan. As she had found the previous night, she couldn’t tear her eyes away from him. Ten days or ten years—he was as necessary to her life as breathing. Just seeing him brought vivid rainbow hues to an otherwise colourless existence. Her head might have given him up, but her heart never could. In that instant she didn’t care that her greatest joy was also her greatest pain. She forgot the most basic rules of self-preservation in the need to assimilate him into her system. Her whole body seemed to be liquefying, weakening her knees and making her heart race—blinding her to reality.

  She didn’t see that one eyebrow lifted mockingly, or that the curve of his lips as he smiled faintly was cynical. ‘You were maybe expecting someone else?’ he asked, agilely mounting the steps to stand before her, hands hitched on the low-slung jeans.

  His sudden closeness made her throat close over. She suffered a sensory bombardment, as if every nerve she possessed had come alive. She could smell the fresh male scent of him combined with the tangy salt of the sea, could feel the heat coming from him in waves. She wanted nothing so much as to walk into his arms and rest her head on his shoulder. To go home.

  Her tongue came out to moisten dry lips so that she could speak. ‘I didn’t expect to find anybody here,’ she denied as firmly as she could.

  ‘Didn’t they tell you I live here, tiger-eyes?’ he taunted softly, and his breath was a warm caress on her face.

  Reba closed her eyes, not wanting him to see her anguish at knowing that her pleasure at seeing him was not returned. Fool! His reaction was exactly as she had expected. She had engineered it. But knowing that didn’t help when she was standing here, as unable to retreat as if he actually held her captive in his arms, torn by a longing to close that small gap which stood between them, to seek the comfort only he could provide.

  Despairingly aware of how stupidly vulnerable she was making herself, Reba attempted to rally her defences. ‘They said…they said you lived on the other side of the island, to the south.’

  Her gaze dropped to his mouth as he laughed huskily. At once she recalled every detail of that kiss last night, and it made her lips tingle, as if his had brushed hers again. Dear Lord, did he have any idea what he was doing to her, even though he hadn’t touched her? She moaned softly, and her gaze rose to lock with his. His eyes were so blue—so cold! She dragged in a ragged breath as their icy sharpness pierced her heart. Her nerves jolted badly. He knew! He knew exactly what he was doing to her, because he was deliberately making it happen! That was why he had chosen to stand so close to her. Shame curled inside her as she realised what a lovesick fool she was. An open book for him to read any time he wanted to.

  ‘Beauty you may have, but your sense of direction stinks. This is south, tiger-eyes. As south as you get on this island before you hit the sea. Surely a sailor like yourself would know that?’ Seeing the hot colour storm into her cheeks, he laughed. ‘It doesn’t matter. I knew you’d make your way here sooner or later.’

  The claim sent a flame licking through her. She might have been forced to dance to his tune, but she wouldn’t do it without a fight. ‘Even you couldn’t be that certain!’

  His hand came up, and one callused finger traced the line of her lips before his hand moved in a caress across her cheek, gliding into her hair, making her eyes close involuntarily as she leant into that touch. ‘I kissed you…remember?’

  The soft words brought her eyes open with another painful jolt to her nerves. In the same instant the proprietorial nature of his touch did what she had been unable to do, and jerked her out of the trance she had been in. She went hot and cold as she became fully aware of what was going on. He was saying she had come because she couldn’t stay away and, by allowing him to touch her so freely, she had appeared to admit it. Blinded by love, she had forgotten he despised her. Worse, she had allowed him to see that she was still attracted to him.

  She stepped away from him abruptly, brought close to tears by a searing wave of despair. Dear God, what was she thinking of? How could she have made herself so vulnerable? Tattered pride came to her rescue, even though one look at his face told her it was much, much too late.

  The knowledge of her betrayal was there in the way her voice broke. ‘Your arrogance takes my…breath away! H-How dare you assume that your kisses are irresistible? Let me tell you…something. They’re loathsome. Vile!’ she choked out, hating the way the steady gaze of those blue eyes never wavered. It said, I’ve seen you, I know you. I expected this reaction and discount it. A shiver caught her.

  ‘If it was that loathsome and vile, you should have fought me off,’ Hunter responded pointedly, reminding her that she had done nothing.

  Her head reared back, hot colour staining her cheeks. ‘I would have, but you took me by surprise!’

  ‘Really? I find that hard to believe, when you recognised me the second you saw me last night.’

  Reba’s hand stole to her throat. ‘I tell you I was shocked. I never expected to see you again!’ she refuted instantly, but her back was to the wall, and they both knew it.

  Hunter took a step closer, which had her tensing immediately, but it only made him smile. ‘Oh, I know that, tiger-eyes. I was shocked too. But not so shocked that I didn’t recognise it wasn’t horror in your eyes when you looked at me, but hunger!’ he revealed crushingly, and moved past her into the hut.

  Reba swayed, as much relieved as devastated by his claim. She had hungered, but not sexually, though, God knew, she wanted him. She had hungered for the love she only felt with him. Hunter hadn’t realised. He had only seen the wanting as sexual! Though it brought her feelings down to their lowest level, it gave her back her defences.

  ‘So Cousin El’s the sucker you’ve got your hooks into. Does he know you’re only marrying him for his money?’ Hunter challenged from inside.

  As if she had plunged into ice-water, his words brought her back to the fear which had been her reason for coming here in the first place. She felt as if she was being battered by stormy seas, and her heart lurched. Was that a threat? Her nerves stretched to screaming pitch as she battled on.

  ‘Eliot loves me!’

  ‘He probably thinks so, but does he know you don’t love him? Love, as we both know so well, not having a place in your scheme of things.’

  That brought back memories so painful that she swayed slightly, and she knew she couldn’t possibly handle this right now. ‘I’m going. I’m not staying to listen to any more of this!’ she shouted back, but had taken no mor
e than a step towards the edge of the veranda when Hunter reappeared, two steaming cups of coffee in his hands.

  ‘Running away, Reba?’ he taunted softly. ‘Now that really isn’t wise. It might just make me do the very thing you don’t want me to do.’

  She stared at him, eyes huge in her pale face. ‘What thing?’

  ‘Tell Eliot that you’re the worst kind of gold-digger. I should know, because you played for me once, when you thought I had money,’ he pronounced, mouth curving in a lazy smile.

  Reba closed her eyes, unable to bear the mockery in his. It hurt to breathe. It hurt unbearably to have to ask the question which had burnt in her brain ever since she had discovered who he was. ‘But you did have money. Why didn’t you tell me?’

  He laughed harshly. ‘You didn’t seriously expect me to tell you just how wealthy I was, when you’d just got through telling me you were looking for a rich husband, did you?’

  Pain seemed to well up inside her, because she couldn’t tell him that, if only he had told her, none of this need have happened. ‘And the yacht?’ Why not hear it all—all her folly?

  ‘I’d sailed it down for a friend, after seeing to some repairs. I knew about letting your agency use it, but I hadn’t intended skippering it myself. Something changed my mind,’ he finished with heavy irony.

  Not something, but someone. Herself. ‘I see.’

  ‘Do you?’ he asked harshly. ‘I’d waited all my life for you, tiger-eyes. I’d been fighting off women who only wanted me for my money ever since I’d started making it. Then you came along, and I believed you were the one woman who loved me for myself. I had a very narrow escape. Had you had the guts to marry me, you would have discovered just who I was, and I would never have known you for what you were, would I?’ He held out one of the cups. ‘Coffee. You look as if you could use some.’

  Her legs felt so weak that it was amazing they still held her upright. She ignored the cup, for there was something more important she needed to know. ‘Are you going to do it?’

  Blue eyes glittered sardonically. ‘Tell Eliot? I haven’t made up my mind yet. Perhaps if you stay and talk to me, you can help me decide.’

  He knew as well as she did that staying was the very last thing she wanted to do, but that his threat made it impossible for her to do anything else. She reached out to take the cup, with fingers that she hoped he didn’t notice were something less than steady.

  She cupped her fingers round the chipped enamel, as if trying to draw strength from it. ‘I didn’t know you were related to Eliot until a few days ago,’ she said shortly, needing to break the heavy silence which had fallen.

  Hunter laughed, a cynical sound which made her wince inwardly. ‘That I believe. If you’d known, you would have chosen a different mark.’

  Her eyes flew to his, shooting angry sparks which bounced off him. ‘Will you stop saying that? Eliot isn’t a mark!’

  One eyebrow lifted derisively. ‘What is he, then, the love of your life? No, no, silly me, I was forgetting I was that!’

  Reba drew in a painful breath at the accuracy of his low blow. Inside she wept, because he had never said a cruel word until the day she rejected him. She had wanted him to hate her, but she didn’t feel proud of having turned him into the man who stood before her. ‘I never wanted to hurt you,’ she began huskily, only to be interrupted.

  ‘No, you simply wanted my money. When you discovered I supposedly didn’t have any, it made me instantly forgettable,’ he sneered, eyes like chips of blue ice.

  ‘That’s not true!’ Reba protested betrayingly, but he seemed not to notice her slip.

  ‘Funny, but I didn’t see you running after me with protestations of undying love! Which was probably just as well, because I wouldn’t have believed them then any more than I would now. I told you once you don’t know what love is and, judging by this latest encounter, you still don’t.’

  If his intention had been to hurt her, then he had succeeded. ‘You bastard!’

  His eyes registered his pleasure at scoring a hit. ‘Was I supposed to love you forever, Reba?’

  Why not? I’ll always love you! The silent declaration was a desperate cry from the heart. She took a shaky breath, knowing she had created a monster which would haunt her for the rest of her life.

  She shook her head, striving for a semblance of calm to get her through this torturous ordeal. ‘It didn’t take you long to get over me!’

  The glint in his eye gave her warning that she wouldn’t like his answer. ‘Perhaps it was something you said, tiger-eyes.’

  Her lids dropped. ‘You must hate me very much.’

  He tipped his head to one side consideringly. ‘Hate you? I have too much contempt for you to hate you, Reba,’ Hunter decided softly.

  Because she suddenly wanted quite badly to cry, Reba raised her chin defiantly. ‘So what do you want, revenge?’

  Hunter sipped at his coffee before answering. ‘I could get that by telling Eliot who and what you are, couldn’t I?’ he mused, eyes dancing.

  Reba gritted her teeth. ‘You’re enjoying this, aren’t you?’

  Draining his cup, he set it aside. ‘It has its amusing side, I have to admit.’

  A flash of anger felt good, temporarily cauterising the wound. ‘God, you’re impossible! You’re going to drag this out as long as you possibly can, aren’t you?’

  His teeth flashed whitely as he grinned. ‘I’m fascinated by the idea of watching a gold-digger squirming on the end of someone else’s hook!’

  Her free hand curled into an impotent fist as she realised how easy it would be to hate him. Perhaps she’d be better off if she did. Yet she didn’t, and battled on as best she knew how. ‘I can see why your family don’t like you!’

  A lazy eyebrow lifted quizzically. ‘Their reasons differ from yours, and I doubt very much if they told you why.’

  ‘I can appreciate why they don’t much care to talk about you,’ she replied tartly, and he laughed. Genuinely, as if the family’s reaction just amused him and nothing more.

  ‘That way they can pretend I don’t exist, while they think up ways to get rid of me.’ Seeing her shocked reaction, he grinned. ‘Not permanently, just from the island. I’m too important to them elsewhere.’

  In an effort to hide the depth of her reaction, when she had thought for a moment that the Thorsons might do him actual physical harm, Reba looked around her. The obvious signs of dilapidation suddenly gave her the idea of how she could shield herself from the worst of his barbs. He already believed she was after money for pure greed, so why not act unrepentant? It was what he would expect anyway. She might just as well be hanged for a sheep as a lamb.

  Her nose wrinkled in distaste. ‘You can’t really live here. This is worse than a slum!’ she said scornfully. It wasn’t, not really, but it looked dangerous, and it made her shudder to think of him living in it.

  ‘Beauty is in the eye of the beholder. To me, it’s perfect. This is my birthright. I was conceived here, and my grandfather left it to me when he died. He would have left it to my mother, but she died years ago, before my father could make an honest woman of her. That’s if he intended to. I always give him the benefit of the doubt. My mother was Eliot’s father’s sister, and what sticks in their craw is that I was born the wrong side of the blanket. While it’s marginally acceptable to have a bastard in the family, they don’t want him living right under their noses.’

  If he had intended to shock her with the confession about his illegitimacy, then he was way off beam. It was on the tip of her tongue to tell him it made no difference to her, when she realised he wouldn’t want to know. So she said instead, ‘Perhaps they wouldn’t mind so much if you did something about this place.’

  ‘You mean, made it more like that colonial monstrosity they live in? Oh no, this suits me fine. Besides, I’ve lived in worse places.’

  Reba turned up her nose again. ‘It’s difficult to imagine anything worse than this!’ she exclaimed disdainfull
y, although in truth, she could imagine it, with a lot of work, looking quite beautiful. Perfect for lovers sharing a meal as the sun set in a blaze of glory. The flight of fancy shocked her back into the present, and she cleared her throat hastily. ‘No sane woman would ever consider living here with you!’

  His answer was as finely honed as a lancet. ‘She would if she loved me.’

  The fatal cut devastated her, and her response was pure reflex. ‘You’ll never get me beggaring myself for love!’ she retorted, then, when the hidden import struck her, she turned a shocked gaze on Hunter. She found his eyes had hardened dramatically. He looked as if he had a bad taste in his mouth.

  ‘No, but you’ve no qualms at all about prostituting yourself for money, have you, Reba?’ he charged witheringly.

  Colour stormed back into her cheeks. ‘I’m not doing that!’ she protested faintly.

  ‘No?’ Hunter taunted as he settled himself comfortably against the porch rail. ‘Your heart isn’t on offer, so that only leaves your body. You’re giving that in return for Eliot’s wealth. Perhaps you can think of another name for it, but I sure as hell can’t.’

  His words scarred her mind, leaving her adrift in the sea of his contempt. That was exactly what she was doing. Coldly, calculatingly. Yet he couldn’t know it was from necessity, never from greed. Even if she attempted to tell him, what good would it do? It wouldn’t miraculously make him love her again—or stop her marrying Eliot. She had given him her word, and he didn’t deserve to be hurt.

  It came as quite a shock to feel Hunter trail the backs of his fingers down her left arm. She jerked, feeling scalded, and almost spilled the hot coffee down herself.

  ‘You have soft skin, but a heart like a steel trap,’ he declared insolently, once again using that proprietorial tone which said he had the right to touch her any time he liked. Instantly she made to move away, but his fingers had gone lower and captured her hand. He raised it so that her engagement-ring caught the light.