Within the Crystal

by Kat Blak

  I hear a loud cough which brings me out of my lustful haze. Shaking my head, I try to clear the fog. Fuck, I’m so turned on it’s crazy. I need to get out of this room before I jump one of them, if not all of them. I can't even remember what I was waiting here for. I clear my throat.

  “If you guys need any help with your assignments, you know where to find me.” I try to say in a professional tone, but im pretty sure I come off as a sex call worker instead. Before I let them say anything more, I'm up and out the door as fast as my shaky legs can take me. Letting the door close softly behind me, I lean against the wall. Damn, I need to get my head sorted before I see them again. I need to make sure I have a game plan in place. I can't be letting my hormones and feelings towards them get in the way of this mission. Maybe it wasn't a vision I saw of all us tangled together, maybe that was wishful thinking. A very nice fantasy that I intend to remember multiple times over, but only when I am alone.

  Chapter Thirteen

  Walking back to the office with my head in the clouds, I manage to get all turned around. From the outside this building looks simply laid out, but the inside is like a rabbit warren, with twists and turns everywhere. I find myself entering a large hall with picnic style tables placed throughout the vast space. Down one side of the room is a large open serving area with deep stainless steel food trays. I must have found my way to the cafeteria that Andrew mentioned earlier. Well, I'm never one to turn away food, and it is past lunch time. Heading to the queue I see forming at the start of the serving line, I grab a tray and join it.

  While I'm waiting for my turn, I glance around the room. It seems to be the complete opposite of the reception area. This room is all wood and big windows up high. Even the arched ceiling has windows. It makes the room look light and airy. I like it. It gives the room a calming feel. Most of the tables are empty, but a few are occupied with students. The majority of them have their heads in open books resting in front of them, or on their computers. Without the steady hum of conversation, most of the noise in the room is from cutlery sliding over the crockery. I guess this place is too high class for the likes of plastic reusable knives and forks. In my high school, the food had been directly served onto the reusable trays with different sections for different foods.

  When I finally reach the food, my mouth starts watering at the delicious smells wafting from it. Surveying the different options, I see everything from pasta alfredo to steamed littleneck clams with chorizo. This place definitely goes all out on its food. However, being highly allergic to seafood, which I happened to find out on my first ever date, I won’t be choosing that option. The male in question opted for lobster and after a quick peck on the lips, my face ballooned. The date didn't end in the fairy tale kiss I had always imagined, instead I ended up being injected in my ass in A&E. To this day I have stayed clear of dating and seafood. Instead I just kind of sleep around. With our lifestyle of always moving, it makes it hard to build on any type of relationship. Maybe that is why my mind is craving these guys, it craves the intimacy and trust that comes with a relationship. Not just the sex, but the small touches of hands, the quick peck on the lips, the brush of fingers over your cheek. I could quite possibly want that more than just sex from these guys. Maybe the boys are more than just a mission, maybe they can show me that there’s more to love.

  “What would you like?” the female server asks from the other side of the counter jolting me out of my inner ramberling. Glancing up, I see she can't be much older than me, but remember, I'm terrible at guessing people's ages.

  “Could I have some pasta alfredo, please?” I ask, being as polite as possible. In my eyes, it's these people that deserve my respect. They work damn hard, plus I could do without her spitting in my food.

  “Here you go,” she responds, passing me a warm plate of food. “That is a beautiful necklace you have,” she says shyly as if she is too scared to speak out to someone, other than to ask what they want to eat.

  “Thank you,” I beam at her. “It's my name stone, it's called Alexandrite.” I can feel the queue getting antsy behind me, but no fucks are given here. I wonder when was the last time someone actually gave a shit about the people who work so hard in the background and spoke to them like actual humans instead of just grunting at them.

  “It's very beautiful,” she whispers as if she’s scared of carrying on the conversation because the asshats behind me are getting shifty.

  “I run the shop in town called Aurora’s Coven, you are more than welcome to come down and we can find one for you if you like. Free of charge,” I say back with the biggest smile possible. “Maybe you will let me read your future, too. I may just see a tall dark stranger in it.” I chuckle raising my brows up and down in a suggestive manner. I leave her to serve the guy behind me and walk away, ready to find somewhere to sit.

  I'm spoilt for choice with all the empty tables. I find one away from the food, which also has no other occupants and I head over to it. Placing my tray on the table, I slide my legs over the wooden bench. Crap, I didn't take my bag to class so I don't have anything to read as all my books are in my bag. I have my back to the room, at least this way I won’t have any accidental eye contact without a book to keep my eyes locked on.

  Taking my first bite of the food is all I need to know that it is amazing. Oh Gods, it tastes better than the frozen pizzas Mom and I have been living on. A moan accidently leaves my lips and it is accompanied by a cough that comes from Nunu, who happens to be sliding onto the bench across from me.

  “A lover of food I see,” he says while getting comfy.

  “When it tastes this good, then yes,” I mumble around a mouthful of food. I'm shoveling it so fast into my mouth I'm surprised I've not started choking yet. This food seems to taste better with each bite and another moan comes out.

  “Wow, didn't know all it took was some pasta to get you moaning. If I feed you pasta, will you moan my name like that?” Cal says from behind me with a cocksure tone and smirk to match. However, his body language doesn't match his tone, his pupils are blown wide and the tent he is suddenly pitching in his jeans shows he is turned on by my moan. In fact, it also sounds like his breath is coming out in pants. Maybe he has been thinking about me moaning his name. Can a girl not eat in peace anymore? As much as I would love to push his buttons, I just wanted to grab some food and sit quietly. My feelings towards these guys are tying me up in knots and making my skin feel itchy.

  When my mouth is empty I look behind me. Yep, there he still stands with his food tray. I look around for the other two boys. I can't seem to find them anywhere. “You're missing two members of your boy band,” I say in a bored tone. I can't let these guys know how much they are affecting me. I wont give that type of control over to Cal. That guy lives for control, the less I bend to his will, the more he will want me. At least that’s my wishful thinking. Nunu starts choking on his food and hitting himself on the chest. When he manages to dislodge the food, he starts laughing.

  “They have class now, but we have a free period. So we decided to head for lunch,” Nunu says, smiling at Cal who has now decided to sit next to me on the bench. A little too close if you ask me. I can feel the hairs on my arms standing up from his close proximity.

  “So, you’re stalking me,” I accuse back.

  “God no,” he says back, shocked that I would even accuse him of something like that. “I think we have got off on the wrong track. Can we all just start again?”

  “Cal,” someone shouts from across the room, but he is too engrossed with his food. His head is tilted down staring at it. “CAL,” the female voice shouts again, only louder this time. As if he couldn't hear her the first time. From the way his body tenses, he definitely heard her. “Calcite, stop ignoring me.” The voice seems to be a lot closer to the table now. I glance up at Nunu and see the look of fear on his face. His eyes are wide and his lips are turned down. I would guess like me he doesn't want to be the center of attention and right now, with the female shouting
at Cal, all eyes in the dining hall are on our table. I would also have to guess that this girl and Cal may have had several public fights before, she just seems like the type to cause shit and not bother who sees.

  Cal turns around to face the girl in question. If Nunu’s expression is anything to go by, do I really want to look? Damn curiosity is killing me right now. “Cal, how come you never called me back, didn’t you enjoy our time together?” Oh God, I should have guessed it was another girl that he has led on and not Barbie from earlier. Fire starts burning in my veins. Has he been with every girl at this school? I can't sit here and watch him tear down another girl. I rise to my feet, throwing my legs over the bench. “I think I just lost my appetite,” I say, striding out of the lunch room. Leaning against the wall just outside of the room, I need to stop and take several deep breaths. If I'm going to be completely honest with myself right now, I don't think I'm mad for all the girls he has led on. I think I’m jealous that I’m not one of them. How stupid is that?

  That’s now twice in one day I have left these guys eating my dust. How the hell am I ever going to get close enough to start implementing Mother Nature's plans? I hope there isn't a time limit on this or we are all screwed.

  Chapter Fourteen

  After a long day in the classroom, TAing for Mom, we finally made it home. As soon as I open the front door, I throw myself onto the couch. Being around so many people for so long has drained my energy. I had planned on doing some star gazing tonight, but I'm way too wiped for anything like that. Tea and bed, I think, is the most I can manage, maybe a shower too.

  While I'm lounging on the couch, Taz dashes out of my room and comes running straight for me. Feeling the negative emotions from her, she curls up on my chest. “He's just an ass,” I say, stroking her head. An image of Cal enters my mind. It’s him as a little boy in a huge room with loads of toys, but he is just sitting on a rug with his knees at his chest and his arms wrapped around them. The look on his face is devastating. He looks so lost and alone. I know Taz is trying to make me feel bad for him and to help explain his behaviour, but it's too raw right now. I'm jealous, I'm sad, I'm hurting and I don't want to feel anymore towards Cal. He is clearly an emotionally unavailable guy and right now my emotions are so frayed and all over the place. I'm the only girl, who also has her own insecurities and pain, and I have to juggle four hearts. All I want them to do is to protect the only heart I have. Is that too much to ask?

  Heading over to the bathroom, I slowly feel my energy returning after the soothing hug with Taz. I decide to have a relaxing bath before heading up to the roof for some stargazing after all. I have always loved being in water, well not open water like the sea. That water scares the ever loving crap out of me. With all the different creatures, and the tides, and the vast amount of unknown. I have always felt that the ocean is a place that demands respect. Many people have tried to harness the sea and failed with their lives. A bath is my kind of water. Perfect temperature, just the right amount of bubbles and some candles. If you really want to, you can place some crystals in the water for ultimate relaxation.

  Stripping out of my clothes and sliding into the bath bubbles, I feel all of the day’s tension being released from my sore muscles. Closing my eyes, I picture the interaction the guys and I had after the lecture. The tingles I got whenever one of them was near me was like my body's responses were no longer my own and were controlled by them. The sound of Tek whispering in my ear, the feel of his hot breath caressing my ear lobe as each word left his lips… these boys have me all tangled up in feelings. Maybe instead of tackling this problem as a whole, I need to break it down. Get each guy alone and work on them individually. Deciding that for my own mental health, I need to get out of my head for a little while and away from the memories those boys have imprinted on my brain, I inhale the scent of lavender burning from a candle beside my head. After taking several deep breaths, I feel my mind go clear.

  After finishing in the bath, and grabbing some food with Mom, I head up to the roof with my supplies. Keeping my flashlight pointed at the ground, I'm able to navigate around the roof. It's a special flashlight as it has a red bulb instead of the normal white ones. It helps you adjust to the darkness and doesn’t cause you to get white spots in the eye when you turn it on and off. Mom has used some of the space up here for greenhouses, so we can grow fresh herbs for our shop. We tend to use a lot of sage, as you can imagine, so we have a whole green house dedicated to just growing that. Mom has always been good at growing plants, flowers and herbs. She has a real green thumb, whereas I just have to look at anything that grows and it dies.

  Heading over to my work station, I roll out my old style stargazing charts and use a diamond shaped paper weight in each corner to hold the browning parchment down. Next to the table sits my stool and in front of the stool is my baby, a Polaris 130EQ Reflector Telescope. I found this one in perfect condition on eBay. Getting myself settled, I look into the eye piece and line the telescope up with the International Space Station. It's always good to line up first with something you are familiar with. I hear the roof door open with a grinding of the hinges. As it's so quiet out here the noise sounds extra loud and causes me to startle, but I still keep my eye on the lense. I know it will only be Mom telling me she is going to bed and to turn the lights off when I get back inside, so I just wait for her to speak. When nothing is said for a while, I whip my head around to find Nunu standing by the door.

  “Sorry, am I interrupting you?” He asks sheepishly while rubbing the back of his neck. “Your mom told me where to find you.” Well that at least answers one question I had. “Oh she also had me bring this up,” he says, holding a cup of warm tea in his hand. “And said to remind you to-”

  Before he is even able to finish that sentence I've already finished it for him. “Yeah I know turn the lights off when I go to bed,” I say in a tone trying to mimic my mother. Chuckling to himself, he takes some tentative steps closer to where I'm sitting.

  “That’s exactly what she said. Why do I get the feeling it isn't the first time she’s said that?” he says while smiling at me. God, that cute smile could melt any girl's panties.

  “That would be because she says it to me most nights,” I respond as he hands me the drink. “Thank you for bringing this up,” I say, smiling back at him. What can I say, his smile is infectious, it lights up his whole face and causes cute wrinkles to appear beside his eyes. He does look extremely sexy in his jeans and long sleeve button up. He has that messy look to his hair again, I bet he has spent the afternoon running his hands through it. It's his glasses I love, they make him look so damn adorable. Plus, I know those glasses sit in front of a stunning set of eyes, in which if you look close enough you can see the answers to the world. His brain, his thirst for knowledge is a true turn on for me. I love intellect, I love to learn about new things, and how stuff can work. I think me and Nunu can learn so much from each other and I really want to learn. Hopefully, he will let me show and teach him about my world. I saw the awe shine bright in his eyes when I have been doing different things with crystals. I want to teach him more, so much more. More about the stars, candles, crystals, runes, herbs and himself. I see so much potential not just with him, but with all the guys. I just wish they would let me in or I guess I just wish Cal would let me in. I feel like he is the alpha of that pack. If he accepts me then they all will.

  “So, to what do I owe for the pleasure of this little visit?” I ask back, shifting uncomfortably on my stool.

  “I wanted to come over and apologise for Cal’s behaviour,” he mumbles, clearly embarrassed as a red hue creeps over his cheeks and up his ears. I watch as my suspicions are confirmed and he runs his hand through his hair.

  “And pray tell, why are you apologising and not him?” I ask, glancing back into the telescope. Yes, I am able to hold a conversation while stargazing. I just never needed to before. Actually, now I think about it, this does feel rather intimate. Me and him below the stars, everything
is quiet and the world below us are sleeping. We could do anything and only us would know. But then again it wasn't like he came to check on me after I had run out of the lunch room. Maybe all this is in my head, maybe I'm seeing things that aren't actually there.

  I don’t want Nunu to see the true pain in my eyes at that realisation, so I keep my face tucked into my telescope and just keep focusing and unfocusing the lens. I really don’t want him to see how hurt I am at the thought he might not have feelings for me the way I do with him. I'm not ready to turn around yet, as soon as I'm able to get my emotion under control I will be able to look at him without breaking apart at the seams.

  “I just felt like I needed to come and check on you, after your first day and all,” he said quietly. “But I can see that you're alright and a little busy. I shall leave you to it,” he says from behind me.

  Taking a deep breath and releasing it, I decide to take the olive branch he is obviously holding out toward me, metaphorically at least. “Would you like to see your birth sign, in the actual stars?” I ask shyly. It kinda feels like I’m asking him on a date, and if he says no the rejection will leave a scar; I never put myself out there for fear of rejection.

  His eyes light up at my invitation. “Are you asking me to geek out with you?” he says with a smile playing at his lips and his eyes bright again.