When Angels Cry

by Marylu Tyndall

  Leigh shook her head. “Whoa. That must have hurt.”

  More than anyone realized. Angelica pressed her heart where an ache rose even at the memory. “When I told Thomas I was pregnant, he totally freaked. Told me I should never tell Daniel, because we both knew he’d do the honorable thing. But it would ruin his career and his life. He would be tossed from seminary. He told me Daniel was meant for great things, and I would only stand in his way. He actually offered me money to have an abortion and never see Daniel again.”

  “Did you take it?”

  “No. I didn’t want his money. But I knew he was right. I was just a cocktail waitress with no future. Daniel was going to be somebody important. We all knew it. Besides, he didn’t want me, anyway.”

  Leigh’s eyes clouded with moisture. “So you just left and never told him about Isaac. Wow. And he never tried to contact you?”

  “He did. I guess he changed his mind. He called several times and even came to my apartment. But I never answered him. Eventually I moved, changed my number, and he gave up. I couldn’t ruin his career. I loved him too much.”

  Leaning toward her, Leigh placed her hand atop Angelica’s. “You poor thing. I’m so sorry.”

  “I don’t think my heart has ever completely healed.” She forced back tears, but they came nonetheless. Leigh handed her a box of Kleenex, and she grabbed one and dabbed her eyes.

  “Well, I totally get why you don’t trust him.”

  Okay, now the hard part. Angelica drew a breath. “Listen, there’s another reason I should leave, besides the fact I can’t pay rent.”

  Leigh sat back and held up a hand. “I don’t want to hear it. You’re staying, and that’s final.”

  “I’m serious. This is serious. I don’t want you and Joel to be in any danger. Who knows what Thomas may do when he finds out I’ve spent time with Daniel again.”

  Leigh tsked. “You’re worried about us? Crazy girl.”

  “I would die if something happened to you or Joel because of me. Just another reason for you to find a new roommate. Hopefully someone who doesn’t have a hit out on them.” Her laugh came out more bitter than she intended.

  “Don’t be ridiculous, Ange.” Leigh waved her away. “Besides, I think you should tell Daniel.”

  “About Thomas?”

  “Well, yeah, that too. But more importantly about Isaac. He has a right to know that he has a son.”

  Just what God had told her to do. Angelica leapt to her feet, heart pounding. “I can’t do that. I can’t put Isaac’s life in even more danger.”

  Frowning, Leigh studied Angelica, then pointed to the Bible on the table. “You’re afraid of one evil man? Where is your faith?”

  Angelica swallowed and gaped at her friend.

  “Doesn’t it say in the Bible”—Leigh picked up a notebook and began flipping through the pages—“that if God is for you, who can be against you? What can man do to you? That He will give His angels charge over you, to guard you in all your ways?” She stopped on a page and skimmed it with her finger. “Jesus said here in Matthew. ‘Do not fear those who kill the body but are unable to kill the soul’, and Paul said in Romans”—she moved her finger down the page—“For you have not received a spirit of slavery leading to fear again, but you have received a spirit of adoption as sons by which we cry out, ‘Abba! Father!’”

  Angelica could only stare at her friend. She’d been writing down scriptures already? More importantly, why was her tone, her expressions so full of faith? A faith that seemed woefully absent at the moment from Angelica.

  Her gut twisted at the realization of what she had done. Knees wobbling, she sank back to the couch, thoughts whirling, shame trampling her soul. The words of God dismantled her every argument. Leigh was right. Angelica had given into the spirit of Fear. Not just recently with this new threat. But for years. From the day Isaac was born, she had worried and fretted and feared for him, for his physical, spiritual, and emotional safety. Day after day, she had tearfully pleaded with God to watch over her son.

  And yet, she hadn’t truly trusted Him to do so.

  Fear—that tormenting spirit, that foul demon that constantly stole her peace, had a claw-grip on her soul, and caused her faith to dwindle. And she had allowed it. Year after year, her Father had asked her to put Isaac completely in His care, and year after year, she had said no and tried to protect him herself.

  And it was Leigh of all people, a new believer—for she could now see the light in her eyes—a babe in Christ, who had revealed her greatest weakness.

  “So, you have been reading the Bible.” Angelica smiled. “You put me to shame.”

  “No shame intended. I have the same problem with Joel, so I looked up fear in the concordance and jotted down every verse dealing with it.” Her eyes sparkled.

  Angelica breathed a huge sigh, sensing a burden floating off her shoulders. “You know Him now.”

  Leigh nodded and the two of them stood and embraced so tightly, Angelica thought she’d implode.

  Wiping tears from her eyes, she backed away. “I need to go pray. Afterward, if you don’t mind watching Isaac, I have something important I must tell Daniel.”

  ♦♦♦

  Daniel headed toward his front door, hoping beyond hope it was Angel. Last night had been incredible, just talking with her, sharing their hearts, dreams, and memories, nestled together on the couch until dawn. And then morning on the beach, eating breakfast, laughing and playing with Isaac. Honestly, Daniel couldn’t remember a happier time.

  But it had been the look in Angel’s eyes that made his heart soar even now. The look he remembered so fondly from long ago, a look of pure love—a look of connection between them that even time couldn’t sever. He’d finally broken through to her. He knew it. And he intended to make her his again—marry her like he should have years ago. If only she’d say yes.

  And quit her cult.

  Surely after she witnessed the masses he brought to Christ through his ministry, she would realize how much more good she could do joining him than hanging around with those fanatics. His church would just have to deal with her past. And the power brokers in D.C.—who surely had more skeletons in their closet than Angel—wouldn’t care after they heard Daniel’s speech and saw for themselves his value. It would all work out, he knew it. God would bless him for all the good he had done.

  Which is why he whistled as he opened the door.

  But his whistle soured on his lips. Pushing his way past him, Thomas marched in, a scowl on his face.

  “You saw her again.” Without turning back, he stomped into Daniel’s living room and halted at the glass doors, staring out at the pool.

  “I did. Not that it’s any of your business.” Daniel returned to his seat on the couch and stared at his laptop where he’d been putting the finishing touches on his speech.

  Thomas groaned. “I don’t know how to get through to you.”

  “Why not give up, then?” Daniel leaned back, clasping hands behind his head.

  Thomas pivoted, his face red. “Give up everything we’ve worked for? Is that what you’re asking?”

  “Don’t be so dramatic.” Rising, Daniel headed toward the kitchen. “Want some juice?”

  “No, I don’t want juice. I want you to come to your senses.”

  Daniel poured the remnants of the juice he’d just squeezed into his cup and stared at his friend. “I love her, and it’s going to work out. You’ll see.”

  “You love her?” Thomas sneered. “Really? A woman who broke your heart, ran off with someone else, and who’s been lying to you all these years?”

  “What are you talking about?”

  “I’m saying you don’t really know Smokes at all. You don’t know what she’s capable of. But I do.”

  Daniel finished his juice and set down the glass, trying to control his anger. Thomas was a good friend, but enough was enough. “Oh, you do?”

  “Remember, I was the one you sent to meet her that night
.”

  Of course Daniel remembered. He would never forget. Angel and he had been fighting and he so desperately wanted to meet her as planned, tell her how sorry he was. But at the last minute, one of his professors had demanded he attend a seminar, and he couldn’t say no. He’d tried and tried to call her, but she wouldn’t pick up, so he’d sent Thomas with his apology and a request for Angel to meet him later at their favorite coffee shop.

  “I was the one who bore the brunt of her anger,” Thomas continued.

  Daniel swallowed a lump of pain at the memory. Angel had told Thomas that she never wanted to see Daniel again, and that she had already hooked up with another guy.

  “I was the one,” Thomas said, “who had to tell you the truth and watch my best friend’s heart crumble before my eyes.”

  Daniel returned to sit on the couch. “She’s different now.”

  Thomas ran a hand through his hair, messing its perfect style. “But you don’t know the entire truth.”

  Daniel stared at him, growing more frustrated by the minute. “Listen, I need to finish this speech.”

  The features of Thomas’ face softened as he sat across from Daniel. “This may be hard for you to hear, but I see now that you must hear it. You have to know what kind of woman she is.”

  “I know what kind of woman she is. Nothing you say can change that. Now, if you don’t mind…” Daniel gestured for the door, wondering if he’d have to toss his best friend from his house.

  “That night”—Thomas leaned forward on his knees, his voice sullen—“she asked me for money.”

  Daniel shook the absurdity from his mind. “Why would she need money?”

  Thomas hesitated for a moment before looking Daniel in the eyes. “Because she was carrying your child.”

  A red-hot skewer drilled through Daniel’s heart. “What?”

  “Yeah, man, your child. She had just found out from the doc.”

  “My child?” Daniel repeated, numbly. Angel had been carrying his child? No, she would have told him. A terrifying thought pierced his brain. “She didn’t… she wouldn’t…?” He couldn’t even say it.

  “No, she kept it.”

  Isaac is my son! Daniel jumped to his feet, part elated, part furious, tremendously confused. “You’re lying!”

  “Think about it, Daniel. Isaac’s birthday is November 11th, right? Seriously, for that to even remotely work out, she would have had to have gotten pregnant within weeks after dumping you.”

  Piece by piece, Daniel’s world began to crumble around him. He hadn’t even asked her when Isaac’s birthday was. He’d just assumed she wouldn’t lie to him. He took up a pace, trying to settle his racing heart. “I trusted her. I never questioned…I never thought she’d keep something like that from me.”

  “She kept quiet because I paid her off,” Thomas said. “With ten thousand I got from my father.”

  “What?” Daniel halted, staring at his friend, wondering if his heart could take another blow. “You paid her? How could you…why would you?” Arrows of betrayal stung him from all directions.

  “So she wouldn’t use the kid to get child support.” Thomas rose, an appeal in his eyes. “Like she intended to do. She would have ruined you.”

  “She took the money?”

  Thomas nodded. “For her silence.”

  Anger, betrayal, fear, and most of all pain, battled within him until he felt his heart would explode. He glared at Thomas. “Why didn’t you tell me? All these years…I have a son.” Plopping down on the couch, he dropped his head in his hands.

  “I did it for you, Daniel. You wouldn’t be where you are today, who you are today, if I had told you.”

  “Then why are you telling me now?” Daniel mumbled without looking up.

  “I could think of no other way to show you her true nature…to stop you from seeing her.”

  Daniel grunted and closed his eyes. “But surely you know now I want to be a part of my son’s life.”

  Thomas released a heavy sigh. “Yeah, that’s what I feared. But I’ve put some thought into it. We can put a nice spin on this. You know, a real bleeding heart story about a woman who kept you from your son for so many years. And now that you found out about him, you are fighting to be a Dad, to do the right thing.”

  When Daniel finally looked up, he found his friend pacing, his eyes flashing as he fabricated the tale he would tell the media. “And you slept with her only once. She seduced you…an innocent young seminary student, and she a loose cocktail waitress.”

  But Daniel wasn’t listening anymore. His emotions were on an ever-accelerating roller coaster…soaring the heights when he realized he had a son, and crashing to the pit when his thoughts tumbled to Angel’s unconscionable betrayal.

  But he would show her.

  Chapter 28

  And you shall know the truth, and the truth shall make you free.

  John 8:32 (NKJV)

  “Hi Daniel.” Angelica expected his usual bright smile, the normal spark of excitement in his eyes when he saw her. But instead, his face was steel, his eyes cold granite, and his scowl could frighten the bravest of warriors.

  Crossing arms over his chest, he leaned against the door frame of his house. “If it isn’t the liar.”

  Angelica took a step back, a familiar ache igniting in her heart. “What? What’s wrong, Daniel?”

  “Thomas told me everything.”

  She stared at him a moment, her mind reeling. “So you know about Isaac.”

  “That he’s my son?” He speared her with his eyes.

  Whispering a prayer, she lowered her gaze. “I was actually coming here to tell you.”

  “How convenient.”

  “I was, believe what you will.” What she couldn’t believe, what she couldn’t understand, was why, after all the threats, Thomas told Daniel anyway.

  “Why, Angel? Why?” Pain flooded his eyes with moisture. “Why keep something this important from me? Why take Thomas’ money?”

  “Is that what he told you?” She shook her head—shock, anger, and pain all mixed in one vicious brew. “I’m sorry, Daniel, I did what I thought was best for you.”

  “For you, you mean. All this time, I’m playing with the kid. Not knowing he’s my own son. And you just stood by and watched, no doubt laughing at my ignorance.”

  “I should have told you.” She swallowed. “I wanted to tell you.” She retreated another step. Hot sun beat down on her. She deserved it.

  His eyes narrowed. “I don’t even know you, anymore, Angel. And I don’t want anyone like you raising our son.”

  Alarm screeched through her. “What are you saying?”

  “Simply that I’m going to get the best lawyers possible and fight you for custody. And guess who’s going to win? A prestigious man of God who can provide Isaac with everything he needs or an unemployed, deceiving cocktail waitress?” Stepping back into his house, he slammed the door in her face.

  Making it all too clear why Thomas had told him. It was the perfect way to keep them apart.

  The drive home was a blur. Everything was a blur through the tears that kept filling her eyes. She parked the car and headed across the street to the beach, needing a moment alone before she faced Leigh. And Isaac. The thought of losing him tore her gut into shreds.

  Yanking off her shoes, she tossed them aside and dropped to her knees in the sand, oblivious of the people around her, to their chatter, the music, the laughter, oblivious to the waves and sun, oblivious to all but the agony in her heart.

  “What am I to do, Father? I’ve lost everything. My job, Daniel, and now Isaac. I trusted You.” She had finally trusted Him, finally committed Isaac into His hands. “I was going to do the right thing and tell him. I was! Why have You allowed this to happen?” Dropping her face to the sand, she wept like she had never wept before.

  No answer came, just the crash of waves on shore and the stares of curious onlookers who no doubt thought her insane.

  Maybe she was.
r />   For wasn’t she making the same mistake all over again? Not trusting God with Isaac. Yes, things were far worse than she could ever imagine, but God hadn’t changed.

  Bowing her head, she watched her tears drop to moisten the sand. “Father, I’m sorry. I’m going to trust You this time. I’m putting Isaac once again in Your hands. Take care of him, protect him, and let Your will, not mine, be done.”

  ♦♦♦

  Baliel stood alone on the beach, watching Angelica battle three mighty demons—Fear, Hopelessness, and Despair. Snarling and snapping their fangs, the fiends slithered around her, whispering in her ears and poking her amour, seeking entrance.

  Gripping the hilt of his sword, Baliel could do naught but stand and watch. Oh, how his fingers itched to put these vile spirits in their place. But the test had commenced, and human will would prevail. Despite its faulty and often devastating choice.

  But not for Angelica. Or so he hoped! She had been through too much, walked the narrow path for too long, grown too much like her Savior to lose the battle now.

  Yet, she was weakening. He could see it in her eyes, in the darkness creeping into her soul.

  No! Be strong, little warrior, for you shall rule with Him one day.

  Finally, she closed her eyes, tears spilling down her cheeks, and sought the Father’s voice within, sought His peace.

  The darkness retreated.

  She bowed her head and relinquished all to the Father’s good keeping.

  Baliel smiled as Fear, Hopelessness, and Despair screamed in unison, uttered a string of foul curses, and sped away, leaving a putrid stench in their wake.

  ♦♦♦

  A tap on Daniel’s office door brought his gaze up to Mrs. Clipton.

  “Yes, come in.” He motioned her forward as he glanced at his speech displayed across his computer screen. Tomorrow morning they would fly to D.C., and the next day he’d stand up before the heads of state, the spiritual leaders of the country, and the President himself to give the speech of his life. At least he hoped it would be. In all honesty, he’d not been able to fully concentrate on it since he’d slammed the door on Angel.