“If you think I could be that man for someone, why would you never let yourself fall for me?” he asked.
“You are my brother's friend, who thinks of me as just a kid. I will never forget that night with you. I'm not going to lie about that. You have no idea how much that night meant to me. When I woke up and read that text, I was devastated. I will never let a man hurt me, Ethan. No man will ever have that kind of power over me. That morning, I realized just how much you could hurt me. If there was ever a man that could crush my heart, it would be you. I will never let that happen. You need to go back to doing what it is you do. I hope one day you realize what a great man you are and how happy you can make someone. The woman that makes you realize that is going to be the luckiest woman alive. I know that I'm not her, and I'm okay with that. I'm a different person than I used to be. I won't avoid any more dinners. I just need you to go back to the way things were between us.”
Julie got up, walked over to the door, and opened it. Without a word, he walked out the door, got in his car, and drove away. She looked down and rubbed the scar on her arm as his car disappeared from her view. After she checked all three of the locks on her front door, she got ready for bed. Making sure her phone was on her nightstand; she left the light on and closed her eyes. Would she ever be able to trust a man again, she thought? Why did he have to be the only one that didn't scare her?
Chapter 13
Ethan thought about the things Julie said to him. The days were dragging by and he was not getting enough done at work. He had never let a woman get to him before. Some of the things she said were true. He knew he came off as an ass to all of his friends. The more he thought about it, the more it bothered him that she felt that way. He was a hard worker and cared more about his friends than they would ever know. If any of them needed anything, he would be there in a second and do anything for them. Work came first in his life, and it was bothering him that his mind was not focused on what it should have been. She said that she wanted him to go back to treating her like he had before. Why was that thought so hard for him?
He had to go out of town again with one of his developers and Gavin. Becky usually would be the one to go with them, but Gavin hadn't let her go back to work yet. The entire trip, Ethan could not take his mind off of Julie. Some of the things she had said about her life had him worried. There was more to her than even her brother knew, and Ethan was going to find out what it was. He was looking out the window of the plane, trying to piece things together in his mind.
“What is going on with you?” Gavin asked. “You've been acting really strange since you found out Becky lost the baby. You left that night and have not been the same since. What happened after you left our house?”
“I was just worried about you guys. Everything's fine,” he said.
Was he really acting different, he wondered? He couldn't let Gavin find out what really happened that night.
“I don't buy that shit. There is something else going on. We all got together for dinner after that. You were there one minute and gone the next. I know there's something there. You know you can talk to me about anything, right?”
Not about that, Ethan thought to himself.
“It's all good,” Ethan said.
“You've been different at work too. We just left a huge meeting, and you have not said a word about it. That's not like you. I usually don't have a moment to speak after we leave. You usually tear every bit of the meeting apart; making sure you said everything you wanted to. When we were there, you were different. There is something going on with you, and I'm going to figure it out. I know you better than you think I do. Is it a woman?”
Why can't he just drop the subject, Ethan thought? If he found out about Julie, they would be fighting in the middle of the plane. That is something Ethan knew Gavin would never forgive.
“Are you serious?” Ethan asked, trying to figure out what to say. “You know that sounds crazy, right? My business always comes first. There is no woman out there that will ever come before my work. You know how I am. Have you ever known me to care about a woman?”
“I haven't ever seen you care about a woman, but something is very different about you. There is something you're hiding from me. I'll figure out who she is eventually.”
“You're so full of shit. I know you're just trying to get me started. Go to sleep or something. Leave me alone,” Ethan joked.
Was he really letting Julie get to him bad enough for other people to notice? He didn't want to be with her. That was not possible. He would never let a woman get her claws into him. The only person he ever wanted to think about disappointing was himself. Women couldn't be trusted and neither could he.
As soon as the plane landed, he was on his feet. It was getting to weird sitting next to Gavin. Who knew if he was going to bring women up again? That was so awkward. Ethan's driver was waiting for the three of them outside of arrivals. Gavin got in the front of the car, since they were dropping him off before taking Ethan and his developer to the office.
When they pulled into Gavin's driveway, Ethan felt his body tense. Becky and Julie were just getting out of Julie's car. They had bags in their hands from their shopping trip.
“Oh crap, Julie and Becky were out shopping together. I can only imagine what they found. Those two are something else when they go out. I'm so glad they get along so well. They are the two most important women in my life. I would do anything to keep them safe,” Gavin said with a smile.
Ethan watched as Julie laughed and joked with Becky. She was so carefree, as she grabbed the bags from Becky and turned toward Ethan's car. It made him think about how different she was when they were alone together. She had opened up to him a little, but he knew she was still hiding things. The bags dropped to the ground, as she ran over to hug her brother. They really were so close. Ethan watched as the smile dropped from her face, when her eyes connected with his and then traveled over to the woman sitting next to him. She let go of her brother, turned around, picked up their bags, and walked to the house.
He pulled his phone out of his pocket and went to open a new text. Gavin walked over to his window and motioned for him to roll it down. He shook his head as he did it.
“What was that about?” Gavin asked.
“I don't know. You know she doesn't like me. She's probably still mad about me picking on her in front of Dr. Boring. I'll see you later. We have to get back to the office.”
Ethan hurried to roll the window up and told his driver to get going as he looked down at his phone. A message came in before he even typed the first letter to her.
“It's so good to see that you agreed with me. I'm so glad that things have gone back to the way they were so quickly. Thank you.” she sent.
He knew she was full of shit. The look on her face when she saw someone with him told him different. She wasn't happy at all. Ethan laughed as he typed his message.
“You sure looked happy about it. I know you're jealous. You know you want to scream my name with me buried deep inside of you.” he sent.
After a few minutes with no response from her, he sent another message.
“By the way, it's not what you think. She is a developer at my company. Ask your brother who she was. He asked me at the car what your attitude was about. Gavin didn't want Becky to travel yet, so we took someone else to our meeting. I'm not sleeping with her. You know I take my job and company very seriously. You know that would never happen. I know it won't stop you from thinking the worst of me. You looked so happy with Becky when we pulled up. It was nice to see you smiling.”
“Screw you.” was her reply.
“Anytime baby.” he sent back as he laughed.
Chapter 14
Julie threw her phone down on the counter as Gavin and Becky walked in.
“Are you okay?” Gavin asked.
“I'm fine,” she snapped.
“Why did you just throw your phone down? Who were you talking to?”
“I was talking to a frien
d. I'm just irritated.”
“When you ran up and hugged me, you were fine. Once you saw Ethan everything changed. You got crabby and took off. Is there something going on? He said you're just mad because he picked on you in front of that guy you brought over here. Did he do something I should know about?”
“You know he's an ass. I don't need to tell you that. He didn't do anything wrong. Everything is fine. Don't go all big brother on me.”
The three of them sat down to have dinner. Becky and Gavin talked about the meeting he had just gotten back from, while Julie thought about Ethan and the woman in the car.
“I'm glad your meeting went well. Did you miss Becky being there? Who else went with you?” Julie asked.
She couldn't help it. She had to know who that woman really was.
“It went well. I missed my wife very much, and it was more expensive without her. We had to get three rooms instead of two,” he joked. “One of the developers from Ethan's office went with us. She is working on the project as well. Since Becky couldn't go, we took her instead. Have you guys noticed anything different about Ethan?”
“What do you mean?” Becky asked.
“You know he acted really odd about the baby. He was really worried about us staying together. He hasn't been the same since. I think something happened when he left here, but he won't talk to me,” Gavin said.
“He was very worried that day. Something about it really bothered him. He came over for dinner after that. You weren't here that day Julie. You had to work. It was strange though. He was here and seemed fine, but he got up and left as soon as he could. He didn't really say goodbye or anything. I could tell the entire time he was here something was going on. It was like he was just putting in his time so he could leave. I haven't really seen him since. How is he when you guys talk about work?” Becky asked.
“He's been acting strange. You know Ethan is all about work and play. He works more than any of us. It's all about making as much money as he can, and he loves what he does. The gaming is really what he's passionate about, but he gets into every part of his company. I can tell that he hasn't been focused lately, and I can't figure out why,” he said, before he looked over to Becky. “You know how he is on the plane after a meeting?”
“He picks the meeting apart and thinks about what he could have done different. What could he have done to make it better? It drives me crazy. That's when I put my music on or start to read,” Becky answered with a laugh.
“He didn't say a word the entire flight home. Not a single word. He stared out the window of the plane.”
Julie listened silently to everything they were saying. She wanted to hear as much as she could about Ethan. Becky looked shocked at what Gavin was saying.
“What's wrong with him? Usually, I want to move to a different part of the plane or do something to shut him up. Did you say anything?” Becky asked.
“I asked him what was going on. He wasn't even focused during the meeting. It was like he couldn't keep his thoughts in line. He said it's nothing and that I don't know what I'm talking about. I was just curious if you guys had noticed anything different?”
“I haven't seen anything different. He's still a cocky ass to me. I really haven't seen much of him lately,” Julie said.
“I think it's because of a woman,” Gavin said. “I know that sounds crazy. He denied it completely. I told him I'm going to figure out what or who it is. He just kept telling me how wrong I was. I'm telling you, there's something going on. I can't believe I'm saying this, but I think some woman is bringing him to his knees. He's never acted like this before.”
“If there is, which I doubt, I can't wait to meet her,” Becky said laughing.
“I agree with you. There's no way anyone is going to change Ethan,” Julie said.
Gavin went back to telling Becky about the deal they closed during the meeting. Julie couldn't get her mind off of their conversation about Ethan. Would he ever change? She couldn't believe she was even thinking about it. No, he would never be anything but a player. His world revolved only around him. There would never be room for anyone else in it.
Julie stood up to leave. She hugged Becky and Gavin before she picked her phone up from the counter she tossed it on.
“Next Sunday, Josh is having a little dinner for Lisa at the restaurant by their place. She didn't want a baby shower, but he wanted her to have something small with the girls. Be there at noon with a small present. He said it has to be under twenty dollars. If you want to come by here, I will drop you and Becky off together,” Gavin said.
“I'll just drive myself. It's out of the way to come here first. That way, you and Becky can go do something after if you want. I'll see you two then.”
There was no way Julie wanted to be stuck somewhere without a way to leave. On the way home, Julie went by the baby store to get a present for Lisa. She wanted to make sure she got it while she had the time. It seemed like now that some of the guys were settling down, there were more dinners and parties going on. She liked seeing Gavin and Josh in love with their women. They seemed so happy. The fairytale dream ended for her a long time ago. Were there really good men in the world like Gavin and Josh, she asked herself?
Julie walked around the baby store. There were women putting in for gift registries and men walking beside some of them. Little babies were being pushed in carts through the store. She looked around and thought about herself. Would she ever feel different about men? Would she ever be able to trust one enough to let her guard down? Would she ever have a family of her own? Julie felt a tear run from the corner of her eye. She hurried to wipe it off and snap herself out of her thoughts.
Being a pediatrician, she found herself judging many of the items in the store. Was it dangerous? Was it educational? Julie burst into laughter. Make a decision, she told herself.
When she was finished shopping, she picked up a coffee on her way home. It was time to relax. She spent too much time thinking about Ethan, men, and families for the day. It was time for a long bath and a book. She carried her bag and coffee up her front steps. When she went to set her coffee on her little table on the porch, it wasn't in its usual spot. Maybe she had moved it the last time she sat outside. She felt her body grow tense and shook her head. Knock it off, she thought. Stop letting your imagination get to you. She let herself in and locked each lock on her front door.
The rest of the week went by as usual. Each day she found herself relaxing a bit more. Everything was just fine.
Sunday morning, Julie got up excited to celebrate with Lisa. It was her special day. With her family not around, all she had was the small group of friends, Josh's family, and the firefighter families. She didn't want anyone spending money on her. Josh was able to give his son everything he would need. Lisa knew if they had a shower people would spend money they needed for their own families. Josh was surprising her with a little girl time. He put a limit on the dollar amount of their presents. That way, she would have the whole experience and not feel guilty about the money they all spent on her.
When Julie walked into the restaurant, she was shocked to see men and women all around. There were balloons and streamers around the room and a cake in the corner. She added her present to the ones on the gift table and went to find Lisa and Becky. Lisa hugged her and thanked her for coming. It was so cute to see her having such a good time. Her belly was getting so big and perfectly round.
“You look so cute. I think you're getting bigger by the day. I can't wait to meet the little man,” Julie said. “I thought it was going to be girl time.”
Becky and Lisa laughed.
“Josh decided to invite everyone. He said it wouldn't be the same without the guys. He knew Lisa wouldn't be happy if all of the firefighters had to stay home while the women had fun. The guys are going to stay in the other room with a television to watch the game, and the girls are all going to stay in here and talk about baby stuff,” Becky said.
“Josh knows me well,” Lisa laughed. “
I told him I wasn't real happy about gifts. He said I would like them all.”
Julie looked over at Becky and saw sadness in her eyes. When Lisa walked off to say hello to a woman who had just walked in, Julie hugged Becky.
“You okay?” she asked.
“I am actually. I'm so happy for Lisa. She's going to be a great mom.”
“It's been a few weeks. You need to go back to see your doctor again. I'm just happy that everything is going well. You won't have to get the procedure done since your body worked everything out on its own. That's a good thing. I'll go with you if you want,” Julie said. “Where do you want to sit?”
The two of them found seats and sat down. Julie asked Becky what she wanted to drink and walked over to the bartender to get them both something. She stood waiting for the drinks, when she felt someone next to her. Julie shivered as a warm breath brushed against her ear. She knew who it was without even looking. He was the only man that could get away with being that close to her, without her body freezing up and fear running through her veins.
“Hello, Ethan.”
“How the hell did you know it was me?” he asked.
“What are you doing here?” she snapped.
“The same thing as everyone else. I'm celebrating with my friends. Is that not okay with you?” he snapped back.
“It's totally fine,” she said.
“I'm glad that I have your permission. Are you having fun at your baby shower over there?” he asked.
“I was,” she snapped.
Gavin walked up to grab a beer for Josh. He looked over at Julie and then back at Ethan.
“Are you two okay over here? It looks like your both about lose it,” Gavin said.
“We are just fine. I was just asking Julie about her boyfriend. I'm surprised you didn't invite him to the party Gavin. If he's going to be around, we should all get to know him better,” Ethan said.
Battle for Love (Bachelor Billionaire #3) Page 8