by LJ Baker
“I thought you didn’t want me to persuade them?”
“With your devil powers, Lucifer. Not with your words, or your hands, or your—”
“I get the idea.”
“Why do I get the feeling that you’re not putting in much effort on this girl?”
“Are you joking? This was the first time she was even in the same room with me, and I didn’t get the feeling that she would rather be swimming in sewage, with her mouth open.”
“You’re being dramatic. She’s just guarded. Put in the effort, get to know her, and you’ll realize that it’s not you that she has an issue with.”
“Even if you’re right, I wasn’t about to push her tonight. The last thing I want is for her to wake up in the morning, in my bed, and think it was a big mistake. It’s taken me the better part of a week to get her to kiss me. If I push her, I’ll blow it for sure. A month isn’t as much time as I thought it would be to get to know these women.”
“Ah, you’re learning a little. That’s a positive.”
“Don’t be a bitch, Harley.”
“But it’s so much fun.” She pushed his papers with her foot until he dropped his hands to his lap in defeat.
No one got away with the things Harley did. She was lucky Luc had a soft spot for her, or she’d be on the receiving end of the punishment in Hell. Okay, so he was full of shit. He adored the annoying demon, but she still pushed him beyond what she should.
“Why don’t you use your evil powers for good, for a change, and help me out with this one. I honestly don’t know what to do with her.”
“As much as I’d like to, you have to walk this path on your own, Lucifer. You just need to put in the work and get to know her story.”
“A competitive eater is looking better and better.”
“Her overindulgences might not be as fun, nor as grotesque, but Amanda is no stranger to gluttony.”
“If you say so. She just seems like a girl who problem drinks. I wouldn’t even call her an alcoholic. I think I got gypped on this sin.”
“Now see, this is why you really need to put in the effort here. You haven’t learned anything about this girl. I’m kind of disappointed in you, Luc. You were so excited to get this month started. What’s up with you?”
“I don’t know.” Luc sighed. “I’m not used to women being revolted by me, I guess.”
“Stop being a drama queen. She isn’t revolted by you. Are you letting that asshole Cupid get into your head?”
“Of course not. How does he even know what is going on in my life? He always seems to know things, like he’s got me under surveillance, or something.”
“He is a creepy little fuck. Can’t we have him tossed in the pit? You know he deserves it.”
“Somehow, I don’t think it would be fair to the other poor pit-mates. No one in Hell has done anything so awful that they deserve that fate.”
“What about Hitler? Or Albert Fish, the guy who ate those children? Or J. Edgar Hoover?”
“Okay, maybe Hoover.”
“Seriously though, isn’t there something you can do about him?”
“Probably, but I’m not sure he’s worth my time. I’m not worried about Cupid. He’s a dick, but what harm can he do?”
“Uh, you do remember that it was probably him that tipped those cops off about Ronnie Falcon, right?”
“If I wasn’t sure before, I am now. It’s like he’s stalking me.”
“Creep.”
“I expect nothing less, honestly. Now enough about that little twit. I don’t want to waste another second of my life on that asshole.”
“Okay, then what’s your next move?”
“With?”
“Ms. Gluttony, of course.” Harley plucked a paper off the desk and looked over it with a bored expression.
“Maybe we can call her Amanda? I keep picturing her face if she caught us referring to her that way. How exactly would we explain that?”
“Ha! I have no idea, but it would be quite hilarious.”
“No. Hilarious is not the word I would use. I can’t imagine I would survive the thin sheet of ice I’m walking on now, after such a thing.”
“Dude, she kissed you. Shut up.”
Luc raised one brow and pulled his paper from her hands. “You are also on thin ice, Ms. Saxon.”
“Oh, we’re going formal now. I see how it is. Look, I know you’re struggling here, but did you just want me to go for the easy ones? I figured you’d appreciate a challenge.”
“Is that what this is? You giving me a challenge?”
“Not intentionally, no, but if the sin fits.”
“I’m not sure it does. That’s sort of the problem. Yes, she kissed me, but I still don’t know anything about her. She doesn’t seem to be at all interested in getting to know me. Even if this girl is my soul mate, how will I ever find out in four short weeks? Or, three now?”
“Remember when we started this and you thought you could do it in a week?”
“A month seemed so long. Yes, I remember, but that’s irrelevant here. I know you’re trying to let me figure this out on my own, but I need some guidance from my best friend.”
“Ugh, you make it sound like you want to have a sleepover where we braid each other’s hair and talk about boys.”
“Maybe not boys.”
“Right, because neither of us are into boys. Either way, I’m not down for the girly BFF shit. You’re a big boy, I’m sure you can figure out how to get a girl to spend time with you.” Harley shook her head and hopped off the desk. “I can’t believe we’re even having this conversation. This right here is why Cupid thinks he needs to step in and shoot you in the ass with his arrow.”
“You do know that’s not how it’s done, right?”
“Of course I know. But he does need your blood. Maybe you should give him a drop or two and see what he comes up with. You know, since you have no faith whatsoever in me. Your best friend, braider of hair, talker of girls.”
“Of course, I have faith in you. I just don’t understand what I’m doing wrong here. Nothing was this difficult with Ronnie and she was a mess.”
“There’s the problem. You don’t even realize that Amanda is even more of a mess than Ronnie was. Here’s my advice. Get to know the girl. Make it your goal in life to spend time in her presence. Talk to her. Learn her story. We all have one, and really, in the end, that’s all we are.”
“I feel like we’re in an episode of Doctor Who.”
“If we were, you could jump in the T.A.R.D.I.S. and skip ahead to see how all this works out. Since you can’t, you’re going to have to put in the work. So get your ass out from behind this desk and get to know the girl.”
CHAPTER EIGHT
“Dammit, I miss all the good stuff.” Toby slumped into the chair and breathed in the steam from the mug of coffee Amanda placed in front of him.
“That’s because you’re a drunken lush.” She slid in next to him and snatched a piece of toast from the stack she’d made them.
“So… what was it like?”
“What?”
“The kiss you idiot. Don’t play dumb with me, Mandy. You know exactly what I mean. Besides, my head hurts way too much to work for the information.”
“Meh.” She shrugged. “It was a kiss. No big deal. So what do you have planned for today?”
“Oh no you don’t, you dirty little liar. You tell me the truth and don’t you dare try to change the subject on me.” Toby took a small nibble off the corner of his toast and put it back down.
“Okay, fine. It was amazing. Life-altering. The best kiss of my life. Is that what you want to hear?” She shoved the remainder of her toast into her mouth, got up, and grabbed the half of cake that was sitting on the counter and a fork.
“If that’s the truth. Is it the truth?”
She shrugged and forked a heaping chunk of cake into her mouth. “Maybe.”
“Are you really going to eat that cake for breakfast?”
“Maybe,” She said with her mouth full of cake. “Cake is better than toast.”
“Yeah, if you want diabetes.”
She waved a hand at him and went back to her cake. “It’s all lies. The government is feeding you that crap so you don’t know the truth.”
“Which is?”
“Diabetes is caused by the chemicals in the water. Or maybe it’s the vaccines. Who knows? But I don’t trust them to be telling me the truth. You leave my cake alone.”
Toby shook his head. “Whatever. Enjoy your sacred cake and tell me the truth about that yummy piece of man-meat.”
She stopped, fork in mid-air, and stared at him for a long moment. “Man-meat?”
“What? It fits. I bet he’d be good raw, or grilled, or roasted on an open fire. I’d take a taste of him no matter how he was served.”
Amanda dropped her fork. “That’s gross. You sound like a cannibal.”
“Okay, yeah, I hear it now. But you get my point. That man is delicious. Okay, no the image is in my head now. It’s ruined.”
“I think we need to talk about something else.”
“Uh no, we need to discuss this kiss.”
“It was a kiss, Toby. We aren’t in middle school.”
“Well then, get your ass over there and make it more than a kiss, and we can have better things to gossip about.”
“I don’t want to gossip. I kissed him. It was amazing. It’s over. We’re working together, so it needs to end there. I need his business. I can’t afford to go getting involved with him and screwing things up.”
“What are you talking about? Why do you assume you’ll mess things up, rather than fall hopelessly in love, and birth six of his babies?”
“Wow. Okay, first of all, I’m not birthing six babies from anyone. Ever. Second, fall hopelessly in love? What are you reading those romance novels again? That’s not how real life works. At best, we’d have some really great sex. At worst, everything would go to shit, he’d break our contract, tell the other club owners that I’m awful to work with, and my business would fall apart.”
Toby stared at her for a long moment. “You really believe that, don’t you?”
“It’s just fact. Look, I know you have all these mushy romantic notions, and that’s great, but for me, real life doesn’t work that way.”
“Mandy, life does work that way. You just have to be open to it. What would it hurt to take a chance and see where things might go with this guy?”
“Haven’t you been listening to me at all? I can’t risk ruining a good thing here. This guy has pull around here. People listen to him, trust him. If he puts in a good word for me, I might be able to increase sales, and that means my business can stay afloat. If he gives people a bad impression, it can be the death of my business. It’s not worth the risk.”
“Do you really think he would do that? It just seems so childish and this guy doesn’t seem like the sort. Besides, you have a better chance of him having nice things to say about you if he gets to know you. Don’t you think?”
“And by get to know, you mean sleep with, right?” Amanda shoveled another hunk of cake into her mouth and shook her head. “Just let it go, Toby. This relationship is going to stay professional.”
“Professional, like when you kissed him last night? Because I can get behind that kind of professionalism.”
“No, not like that. The kiss was a mistake. It’s not going to happen again.”
“Have you told him that? Because I feel like that’s the sort of thing you need to talk about.”
“You’re right. I do need to talk to him about it. He needs to understand that I was caught up in the moment and that it won’t happen again.”
“And if he pulls you into his big strong man-arms and plants one on you?”
“There really is something wrong with your brain. You know that, right?”
“My brain is just fine. I think it’s yours that needs a checkup.”
“Why do you care? Did you place bets on us getting together, or something? You’ve been acting so weird lately. It’s like you have some stake in my love life.”
“Other than wanting to see my best friend happy?”
“I’ll be happy when my business is thriving and I can afford to hire employees. Hooking up with the customers isn’t the way to get there.”
“Oh, baby-girl, I don’t even know what to say to you, other than you’re so wrong.” Toby took another nibble off his toast and put it back down. “I know you have this notion that you need to block off your vagina in order to make this business work, but you’re wrong. You can have your career and a healthy boning on the regular. I promise you, it’s possible.”
“You’re a pig. Do you ever think about anything besides sex?”
“Of course not. I’m a man.” Toby scrunched up his nose and shook his head. “And men are able to admit that they like sex. Unlike some women I know.”
“I like sex.”
“Oh? When was the last time you had any?”
“None of your business.” Amanda took the remainder of Toby’s toast and shoved it in her mouth.
“The food doesn’t buy you time. I already know you’re a slob who talks with her mouth full. Now how long? I’m expecting an answer this time.”
“Almost three years,” she whispered, not really expecting the words to come out of her mouth at all.
“Three years?” Toby’s eyes grew wide and she immediately regretting answering him at all. “You have to be joking. You are joking, right?”
“It’s not a big deal.”
“Yes, Mandy, it is a big deal. Why did you stop?”
“I don’t know, it’s a long story.”
Toby looked at his pretend watch and raised one brow. “I’ve got time.”
Her heart sped up and she could feel her pulse throbbing in her temples. She didn’t tell this story. She didn’t speak the words out loud. Doing that made it all real and it couldn’t be real. How could she live with herself if it was real?
“Mandy, you can tell me anything. I’m not going to judge you.” He put his hand on top of hers and gave it a gentle squeeze.
She trusted Toby. He was crass, and obnoxious, and all up in her business, but she’d grown to love him over the last two years. He’d been there for her when she was at her lowest, even though he had no idea what was going on in her life. That was her fault though. She pretended everything was okay. She put up her walls and kept him out.
“I was dating this guy, Greg. He was a few years older, tall, dark, mysterious.”
“Kind of like Luc?”
“Yeah, exactly like that.”
“Okay, go on.” Toby got up and started making tea. He wasn’t the biggest fan, but he knew it always calmed her.
“Greg was great. He was funny, charming, and we loved all the same things.”
“Food and alcohol?”
“Yes, and a lot of other things. We were going to parties at least four times a week. Drinking all the time, having a lot of great sex, if you must know.”
“I must. Wanna give me details?” Toby placed a mug of tea in front of her and pushed the jar of fancy honey toward her that she liked so much.
“No. Anyway, Greg was an adrenaline junkie. Jumping out of air planes, cliff diving, drag racing, anything that got his blood pumping, got him off.” Amanda spooned some honey into her tea and swirled the hot liquid around. She wasn’t sure she could actually get it to go down her throat, but the steam felt nice on her face.
“You don’t strike me as the type. I can’t imagine you free-falling at thirteen thousand feet.”
“Try harder, because I’ve done it. Several times.”
“Seriously? Wow.”
“The crazier an idea, the more Greg wanted to try it. I wasn’t much better. Whatever he came up with, I was right there by his side jumping in. The drinking was out of control. You think I’m bad now, but this is nothing compared to then.”
“Is that how you got the DUI’s
?”
Amanda swallowed hard. “Yes.” The word was like coughing up a rock. It hurt to say and felt even worse once it was out. Her first DUI was bad. The second was worse. But the most awful part was the third one that she never got.
“How long were you two together?”
“A year and a half. We were engaged. He proposed at the top of a cliff we’d scaled at sunset. It was beautiful and crazy and everything I’d ever wanted. He was everything I’d ever wanted. Before Greg, I was out of control. It sounds insane, after the things we did, but before him, I just jumped from guy to guy, never caring about anyone or anything. Greg changed me.”
“But you didn’t get married?” Toby glanced down at her ring-less hand. There was no tan line, no ring indent, no ring.
“No. We celebrated the engagement. All of our friends were there. The alcohol was never-ending and the party went on until nearly dawn.” She swallowed hard, then continued. “No matter how much we partied, Greg got up and went to work the next morning. Or sometimes, straight from the party if it went all night. He enjoyed the good times, but he was a hard worker, too.”
Amanda got up and went to the sink. She emptied the then cold tea and rinsed the mug. She needed a minute in her thoughts. As hard as all that was to tell Toby, the worst was yet to come. She wasn’t sure she had the strength to get through it.
“I wish I could have known you then,” Toby said as she returned to the table and sunk into a chair.
“I was the life of the party.” She let a small laugh escape, but nothing about it was funny. “I used to think that was important, that having a good time trumped everything else in life. I was wrong.”
“There’s nothing wrong with having fun. You were young, you should have been enjoying life. You still should be. You deserve to.”
“No. I don’t. I really don’t.”
“And why not? Because things didn’t work out with this Greg guy? You still deserve a good life.”
“Not when he doesn’t have one.”
She let her words sit in the air for a long moment. It wasn’t until she saw the look of recognition spread across Toby’s face that she spoke again.