Just Breathe Trilogy Box Set

by Martha Sweeney

  “Emma,” Joe calls loudly.

  “What?”

  “I want it . . . the baby,” he confirms. “I want you. I want our baby. I just want to make sure you feel the same. It would kill me if you didn’t want to keep it, but if that’s what you want I will . . . .”

  My mouth forces itself against his, cutting him off as I realize what he’s saying. “Seriously?”

  “Yes,” he confirms. “Seriously. I love you. Why wouldn’t I want the baby? It’s a part of me. It’s a part of you. It’s a part of us.”

  “I’m sorry,” I say bashfully.

  “For what?”

  “For not telling you sooner. For snapping at you when you . . . proposed downstairs,” I share. “For thinking that you might not want the baby. For . . . .”

  “Don’t, beautiful,” Joe soothes. “Don’t. Don’t apologize. It’s okay.” He softly pushes strands of my hair out of my face.

  “No . . . no, it’s not,” I object.

  “Yes,” he laughs. “Yes. It’s okay.” Joe shifts my body back on the bed and continues to kiss me.

  With so many emotions laced in his actions, Joe begins to undress us both. His fingertips caress every single inch of my body as his lips taste my skin all the way down between my legs. My body joyously celebrates the sensations coursing through my veins as Joe’s mouth slowly builds up the first orgasm that bursts inside me. As he shifts up my body, I try to get on top of him to return the favor, but he denies me.

  “No,” Joe counters sweetly. “Just relax and enjoy.” He rolls us so he’s back on top.

  “What’s wrong?” I ask when he keeps his body hovering over my belly a few inches.

  “Nothing,” he states.

  “Joe?”

  “I . . . I don’t want to hurt the baby,” he reveals bashfully.

  “You won’t hurt the baby,” I reply.

  “You sure?” he checks.

  “Yes,” I confirm. “Please . . . Please. I need you. I need you to . . .” my voice falters.

  “What?” he checks.

  Brushing the few strands of his hair off his forehead, I reveal, “I . . . make love to me.” My body trembles with desire at the words that just slipped past my lips and for the expression of pure joy on Joe’s face.

  “Yeah?” Joe says, eager to meet my request.

  “Yeah,” I repeat, bobbing my head.

  Joe removes the rest of his clothes as he continues to always keep his lips on me. “Do we need protection?”

  “No,” I giggle. “The baby is already there. Condoms won’t be needed until after I . . . you know . . . the baby is out.”

  “I like the sound of that,” Joe says with a smile.

  Our mouths reunite, entwining and creating a new song between us — a song of unspoken passion, desire and emotions that I am unable to express in any other way than with my body. His hands explore my skin as if it’s the first time. Each kiss is laced with the love I see in his eyes each time he tells me that he loves me. Each thrust represents the connection of our souls converging, blurring the lines of the physical and meshing everything into a single entity. Each orgasm is like another star being born in some far-off galaxy that is only meant for the lovers and dreamers of the world.

  “I love you,” Joe says, nuzzling into my neck as our love making softens.

  My lips curl upward and my fingers dance in his hair.

  A few minutes go by and then Joe asks, “Emma?”

  “Hmm?”

  “Is that why you disappeared the day I came back from New York? Kim told you you were pregnant?” he guesses.

  I take a deep breath and let it out before I answer. “Yes.”

  “Why didn’t you tell me?” His large, warm hand spreads over my belly.

  “At first, I didn’t believe it,” I admit. “I needed time to wrap my head around it.”

  Joe nods as he rubs my stomach. “Were you scared to tell me?”

  “Yes,” I answer quicker than I expected to.

  “Why?”

  “I don’t know,” I reply. “I wasn't sure of a lot of things.”

  “Did you think I would stop loving you?”

  My shoulders jerk up and down once.

  “Did you think I would leave you?”

  My eyes give away my thoughts — I can see it on his face.

  “I would never leave you,” Joe comforts. “Not for becoming pregnant with our baby. Not for anything.”

  I pull him closer and kiss him.

  “How far along are you?”

  “I don’t know,” I admit. “I didn’t really let Kim tell me much. I freaked out and left her office in a hurry.”

  “That’s understandable,” he says.

  “Joe?” I ask.

  “Yes, beautiful,” he answers.

  “Don’t be mad,” I state.

  “I’m not mad. Why would I be mad?” he searches with confusion.

  “I . . . Anna knew,” I share. “The day I went with her for her errands.” I deliberately pause to gage his reaction which is a very soft, but blank expression. “I had her get me some tests because I needed to see it for myself.”

  Joe doesn’t say anything. He smiles and lowers his lips to mine, kissing me several times. Then, he shifts his body to place his head gently resting on my belly. “Emma?”

  “Yeah,” I reply with my fingers dancing in his hair.

  “I know you won’t marry me . . . not yet,” he says with a smirk. “I didn’t ask in the best way and you deserve a better proposal than that . . . but, I meant it. I would marry you in a heart beat. Not because you’re pregnant, but because I love you and you’ve made life that much more worth living . . . especially now, knowing that there’s a little me, a little you, a little us growing in here.” His lips brush against my tummy.

  Holy fuck. What does a girl say to something like that? God, with words like that, I think that if he did propose this very instant, I would say yes. Tears form in my eyes and I hear the back of my brain begging for him to ask me again. What the hell is going on?

  “So, for now . . . will you consider the idea of maybe us moving in together.”

  I feel my brows furrow.

  “Just consider it,” he repeats. “I’m not saying that we have to right away. I just . . . I love you and I want to spend every moment that I can with you . . . with our baby. Regardless if you’ll marry me . . . I want to be with you and our baby as much as I can.”

  Water pours from my eyes — there’s no stopping it.

  “Emma,” Joe requests. “Beautiful, don’t cry. Please, don’t be upset.”

  “I’m . . .” my voice chokes. “I’m not upset . . . I . . . I don’t know what I am right now other than a mess.”

  “You’re not mad at me?”

  “How can I be?” I answer honestly.

  “So, you’ll think about us moving in together?”

  “Yes,” I confirm.

  “Wait,” he says, getting up.

  “What?”

  “Don’t move. Wait. Just wait,” he instructs.

  I can’t help but stare at Joe’s round, naked ass as he leans over the edge of the bed to get something. “What are you doing?”

  “Don’t move,” he grunts as he turns.

  “I’m not moving,” I confirm. “But, what are you doing?” I shift up onto my elbows for a better view.

  “Okay,” he announces with his phone in hand.

  “What the hell are you doing?” I ask with my eyes fixed on his hand.

  “I want video of this?” he reveals.

  “Of what?”

  “Of this. Of us. I want to capture this moment just after you told me that we’re going to have a baby,” he states.

  My hands dart to my breasts. “I’m naked.” I try to pull the covers up high enough, but he yanks them away. “Joseph,” I scold, wrapping my arm across my breasts to hide them.

  He chuckles. “There you are. “There’s my beautiful Emma.”

  “You’re
going to get it for this,” I challenge.

  “Say it again,” Joe requests.

  “You’re going to . . . .”

  “No,” he laughs, cutting me off. “Tell me like you were going to tell me.”

  “About what?”

  Joe cocks his head to the side.

  “I don’t know how I was going to tell you that I’m pregnant,” I blurt. “I didn’t have it figured out which is why it came out the way it did, you goof.”

  Joe flips his phone and I can see the reverse screen that is showing both of us with my face in the background as Joe’s head is gently resting on my belly. “As you can see, this is not your mommy’s and my first argument.”

  “This video will never be seen by our child,” I contend.

  “See,” Joe laughs. “This is how she’s been since the first day I met her and why I love her.”

  “That’s not funny,” I say, reaching for the phone, but Joe blocks me.

  “Just go with it, beautiful,” Joe suggests.

  “Since when have you known me to just go with it?” I ask.

  Ignoring me, Joe continues, “So, as I was saying . . . this is the day your mommy told me about you growing in her belly.” Joe kisses my skin just below my bellybutton. “And, I think this is the second best day of my life . . . the first being the day I met your mommy. She was so beautiful and I couldn’t take my eyes off of her.”

  “Stop,” I whine.

  “Shhh,” Joe hushes. “We can’t wait for you to get here . . . and, as you’ll learn, mommy isn’t always good with her emotions and she has a challenge when daddy openly tells her how beautiful she is, how much happier he is to have found her and how much he loves her.”

  “Joe,” I whine.

  “She won’t admit it . . . not openly, but I know she cares too,” he states with a chuckle. “If she didn’t . . . we wouldn’t be here right now and you wouldn’t be growing in her belly. You were made with love.”

  My heart melts at his words and I stop fighting and embrace the moment.

  “I’m so happy you’ve come into our lives . . . your mommy is stuck with me now, even if she won’t marry me . . . yet. Don’t worry. I’ll get her to say yes,” Joe continues.

  “Your . . . daddy . . . is a persistent one,” I comment, taking my time using the new word that will now become a part of my vocabulary.

  “Patient too,” Joe adds with a chuckle.

  “That you are,” I confirm.

  “Regardless of where we are and what is happening . . . know that I will always love your mommy, and we will always love you.” Joe kisses my belly.

  I smile and nod my response. “Joe,” I call with my throat tightening.

  “Yeah, beautiful,” he says, moving to where our heads are practically next to each other’s.

  “I’m . . . I’m scared,” I admit.

  With a sweet smile, Joe replies, “Me too.”

  A nervous smile curls onto my face.

  “But, we have a bunch of great friends and family downstairs . . . and more all around us between here and back on the East Coast, who will help us and support us if we need it,” he adds.

  “Yeah,” I agree, playing with his hair.

  “Most importantly, we have each other . . . and, we do make a great team,” Joe reminds.

  “Yeah,” I giggle. “We do.”

  “We’ll take this one day at a time. Okay?”

  “Okay,” I agree.

  “You can do this,” Joe states confidently. “We can do this.”

  One Hundred Thirty One

  Joe and I continue to talk to each other and my belly even after I eventually convince him to stop videotaping. As the topic of the baby comes into play, we both realize that we don’t have a single clue as to what we are doing and promise that we won’t drive ourselves or the other crazy with too much research — I had to lie about this a little.

  “Hey guys,” Maggie calls, knocking on the door. “I don’t want to interrupt . . . okay, maybe I kind of do.” She giggles. “But, Emma should really get something to eat, especially after what happened earlier.”

  “Okay,” Joe and I answer at the same time.

  “We’ll be right down,” Joe adds. He looks to me. “You ready?”

  “Sure,” I say, lacking confidence.

  Joe kisses my hand for reassurance before we get up and get dressed.

  As our feet hit the last few steps of the stairway, Jared pops into view. “Hey, Kitten. Joe.”

  “Hey,” I reply back.

  Joe smiles and nods.

  Jared pulls me into him for a hug, and I happily return the embrace. “You okay?”

  “Yeah.”

  “Good,” Jared replies. “Did he propose again?”

  “No,” Joe answers before me. “Not yet.” Jared and Joe smile at each other and there’s some kind of guy speak happening between the two of them in their eyes that I can’t quite make out.

  “Did you two kiss and make up?” Jimmy teases.

  “Yes,” Joe admits rather quickly. “Now shut up. I’ve got a woman and a baby to feed.”

  Our friends laugh and wait quietly for us while we get a plate full of food each.

  “Please tell me that none of you have told anyone outside of here?” Joe searches, taking his second bite of food.

  “Nope,” Jared confirms. “I made sure no one made a call or sent a text message.”

  “Thanks,” Joe replies.

  “What’s the big deal?” Jimmy asks, clearly not happy with not being able to share.

  “I want Emma and I to share the news, not anyone else. I want mom and dad to hear it from us directly,” Joe explains.

  “Okay, fine,” Jimmy whines jokingly.

  “So, when are you going to tell everyone?” Allen checks.

  Everyone looks back and forth, waiting for either Joe or I to answer.

  “When we’re both ready,” Joe answers for us.

  “How far along are you, Emma?” Allen inquires. “We know you’re not near as far as Maggie since you’re not showing.”

  “I don’t know,” I admit.

  “What do you mean, you don’t know?” Jimmy checks.

  I explain how and when I found out and what I did up until this moment for the most part. Jimmy and Allen are shocked when they find out that Anna knew and helped me confirm it on my own. They tease her, calling her a traitor and that she’s supposed to be on the Covelli side when it comes to all matters. Anna presses back playfully, attesting that she is on the Covelli side, for the one who is growing inside me.

  Joe tries to pile more food onto my plate just as I finish my last bite.

  “I’m good, babe,” I state, blocking him from adding more.

  “You need to eat,” Joe instructs.

  “I’ve eaten enough for now,” I reply. “If I eat any more, I’ll throw up.”

  Joe nods, accepting my refusal and guides me to sit on his lap while we stay at the table with our friends.

  “This is so exciting,” Maggie announces. “We get to be pregnant together.”

  “Yay,” I say sarcastically.

  The guys laugh.

  “I’m serious,” Maggie defends.

  “Me too,” I return with a smile.

  “Stop that,” Maggie corrects. “This baby . . . our babies are good things that are happening to this family. Our family is growing and I think it’s awesome.”

  “Me too,” Nathan comments. “I’m going to have two nieces or nephews now to spoil the crap out of.”

  Jared starts laughing uncontrollably.

  “What’s so funny?” I ask.

  “You don’t want to know,” Jared answers.

  “Yes, I do,” I confirm.

  “Trust me, Kitten. No, you don’t,” he says, laughing harder.

  “What?” Maggie inquires.

  Jared leans over and whispers in her ear. Maggie purses her lips to hide a smile.

  “What?” I search.

  Maggie turns and
whispers into Henry’s ear while Jared does the same with Nathan. Both Henry and Nathan crack up laughing.

  “Seriously?” Joe states, unamused.

  “Let’s just say . . .” Maggie begins to share, “Nǎinai’s always right.”

  My eyes narrow. “Not funny.”

  Joe’s body pulses under me slightly — I know he’s getting a kick out of this. He repeatedly kisses my cheek and rubs my belly.

  “I don’t get it,” Jimmy says with a confused look.

  Jared explains Nǎinai’s blessing from last New Year’s when we all first met.

  “Makes sense,” Jimmy chuckles.

  As I take a sip of my tea, Allen asks, “So . . . when’s the wedding?”

  I choke, almost spitting out my drink.

  “What?” Allen responds after everyone makes sure I’m okay.

  “We’re not there yet,” Joe addresses the elephant in the room. “Soon . . . but, not yet.”

  My eyes widen and I shake my head gently in protest — mostly for the fact that we’re talking about the idea of a wedding — in front of everyone.

  “So . . . how did it happen?” Jimmy asks.

  “What?” Joe and I say at the same time.

  “The baby,” he clarifies.

  “Well,” Joe begins, “When a man and a woman have sex, the man puts his penis in the woman’s . . . .”

  “I know that part,” Jimmy states, cutting Joe off as everyone chuckles. “I meant . . . how did you end up pregnant? Did the condom break?”

  I look away, not wanting to answer.

  “We don’t always use condoms,” Joe reveals.

  “So . . . Emma forgot to take her pill once or twice?” Jimmy presses.

  “I don’t use the pill,” I share.

  “Even if she did, many women get pregnant when on the pill,” Maggie adds.

  “Then, what do you use?” Allen inquires.

  “The Billing’s Method,” Maggie answers for me. “It’s very easy to use to find out when you are and aren’t fertile. They probably got swept up by the moment and forgot what day it was. That’s what happened with Henry and me with the first pregnancy.”

  I smile warmly at Maggie, more so when we make eye contact, happy to hear her speak of the miscarriage so openly and without any pain.

  “So . . . what would you do if you remembered in the middle of it?” Jimmy pushes.

  Jared, Nathan, Jimmy and Allen look back and forth between Joe and Henry waiting for a response. When neither of them speak up, Maggie does.