I Am Never Alone

by Campbell, Jamie

  A yellow luxury car was a beacon for trouble.

  Jet still wore his dubious look as we stepped into the public library. He was waiting to tell me he told me so. That we wouldn’t find anything useful in a library. That we were wasting our time on a silly whim.

  Perhaps he was right, but I had barely scraped the surface of the books in the secret room last time I was there. If I had managed to summon Kostucha after just one spell, I couldn’t help but wonder what else I could do.

  If the demon was so worried about me that he took it upon himself to inflict some serious pain on my head, then that meant he was nervous.

  Which meant I could kill him.

  I just needed to find a way.

  The librarian crossed the room in less than a blink of an eye when she saw us inside her domain. She hovered above me, showing me every one of her wrinkles and scowls.

  She would have to do better than that to scare me.

  “You dare to come back?” she asked with a moan. “Nobody comes back here.”

  “My friend and I need to read in your secret room,” I said, earning myself a confused look from Jet. I ignored him. “We will be here for a couple of hours. I hope that is okay with you.”

  Her sunken light gray eyes flicked between Jet and I. Her chest heaved up and down with breaths that didn’t actually exist. Her dirty white dress flowed with a breeze only she felt. “You ripped a page out of my book last time. I heard it scream in pain.”

  “I’m sorry. I won’t do it again, I promise.”

  She crossed her arms in front of her, probably a habit she had while alive too. Her cross expression would surely have scared any kid that dared touch her books with sticky fingers.

  It certainly made me think twice about tearing any more pages from the books.

  “Everly, what-”

  “Please?” I tried again, cutting Jet off. “It is really important we search through those books. It will help you and all the other adults that have died.”

  She nodded toward Jet. “And him? Does he promise not to harm my books too?”

  “He does. We will both abide by your rules.”

  “You didn’t last time.”

  “I know and I’m sorry. Truly sorry.”

  She threw her arms up in the air. “Go ahead then. But I’m watching you.”

  “Thank you.” I grabbed Jet’s hand and pulled him through the library to the back area. From there, I grabbed the flashlight off the wall and headed down the stairs.

  Jet trailed behind the whole way, trusting I wasn’t about to lead him to his ultimate doom.

  It was stupid to be that trusting these days.

  He would get himself killed one day.

  We fell into the secret room, surrounded by the books of magic, mystics, and everything demon related. Jet’s face had the same look of wonder I must have worn when I first discovered the place.

  “Welcome to the underbelly of the public library,” I said, gesturing around the room.

  “I never knew this existed.”

  “Neither did I.”

  “How did you find it?” He tore his eyes away from the books to stare at me intently. He wanted an answer, a real one. He probably deserved it, too.

  “There is a spirit here. She’s the librarian that used to run this place. I came here a few days ago, hoping to find something about summoning a demon. She worked out what I was after and showed me down here.”

  “Was she who you were talking to upstairs?”

  “Yeah. She’s pretty scary, she doesn’t like people being on her turf.”

  “I could kind of feel something,” Jet started, looking away, embarrassed. “It felt really cold and… like I shouldn’t be here. I had this overwhelming urge to run. Was that because of her?”

  I nodded in understanding. “It was. It’s how she keeps the place hers. Most people don’t realize what they are feeling, they don’t recognize it as a spirit and just leave.”

  He shook out his body, as if getting rid of the heebie-jeebies. “I’m glad I don’t have to see them.”

  “It’s probably better seeing them than just feeling their effects,” I countered. As least I knew what the source of some inexplicable feelings were. Others just felt, but I saw. I could see through their empty threats.

  Although… something told me the librarian wasn’t just giving out empty threats.

  I was not going to tear out any pages from the books today.

  Not for a million dollars.

  “We’d better get to work,” I said, ending the conversation. We had much more important issues at hand.

  I crouched down to examine the books on the bottom of the shelves. It was an area I had neglected the last time I was there. Which meant it could hold an untold wealth of knowledge.

  Jet found a book of his own and we settled into a comfortable silence. Page after page, book after book, we rifled through the dusty tomes searching for something we weren’t even sure what it was.

  How did one kill a demon?

  How did one find a demon?

  How did one survive confronting a demon?

  The healing burns on both my arms were testament enough to know how dangerous Kostucha was. If we met again, would he be even worse? Would he hesitate to take my life next time? Would he use that noise like a weapon once more?

  Would I survive it again?

  I pushed all thoughts aside and focused on the task at hand. I had to find a way to kill the demon and panicking wasn’t going to get me there.

  “Hmmm,” Jet said after about an hour of silent reading. His voice seemed loud in the room where the only other sounds were the turning of pages.

  “What is it?” I asked, taking the bait.

  “There is no possible way to kill a demon,” he replied.

  I had hoped for something more… optimistic.

  He passed me the book and pointed to a section. It was titled: Demons & Actions. I found the passage he was referring to:

  Hunting, Demon. The act of pursuing a creature of Hell with the intention of killing, maiming, or vanquishing. Largely considered to be a dangerous pursuit. Not recommended for mortals.

  Killing, Demon. The mistaken belief that creatures of Hell can be exterminated. The only known way to stop a creature of Hell is to vanquish them.

  Vanquishing, Demon. The act of returning a creature of Hell back to whence it came. Can be accomplished in a number of ways. Not recommended for mortals. Best undertaken by those with magical protection.

  It was difficult to work out whether the text was to be believed or not. The books were supposed to be based on fact, but everything was subjective. Perhaps the author didn’t know how to kill a demon?

  “Keep looking,” I said. “If we can’t find anything on how to kill, then we’ll consider vanquishing.”

  Jet wanted to argue, it was written in every one of the movements he was trying to hide. I waited for the fight, the challenge.

  But it didn’t come.

  He returned the book and found a new one.

  I got back to my book, this time looking for details on vanquishing as well as killing a demon. Any little piece of information could be proven useful.

  Another hour passed in silence. I felt someone standing next to me. I looked up, expecting to ask Jet what he was doing when I realized it was Oliver.

  I desperately wanted to ask him where he had been and if the spirits were alright, but I couldn’t. Not with Jet listening to every word. He would think I was crazy.

  Perhaps he would be right.

  Instead, I smiled and cocked my head to one side, silently questioning Oliver.

  He spoke, not needing to be worried about being overheard. “Everything is sorted out. We had a batch of new arrivals and they were scared. A building collapsed across town, taking about eight kids out. They’ve settled down now and other spirits are looking after them. Found anything?”

  I pointed to the page I was reading, the part about demon vanquishing.

&nb
sp; “Vanquishing means sending the demon back to Hell. It’s probably easier than killing them,” Oliver said, musing out loud.

  My lips clamped together tightly, reminding me I couldn’t speak. I looked over at Jet, lost in his own book. He had spent all morning helping me, he had spent all night sleeping on a concrete floor because he was worried about me, he chastised me when I didn’t ask for more food.

  It was time.

  “Jet, there is a spirit here. I’m going to talk to him for a minute,” I said.

  “Okay,” he replied, drawing the word out while his eyes darted all around the room – like he might be able to see the spirit if he looked hard enough.

  Or perhaps he was hoping it wasn’t the librarian.

  I turned my attention back to Oliver. “So if we vanquish him, will he be able to come back?”

  “There’s always that chance.” He shrugged, his brows furrowing. “But if we can’t kill Kostucha, we’ll have no choice but to vanquish him.”

  “I can’t risk him returning. Not when there are so many spirits that need to cross over.”

  “If he’s vanquished, it will give us a chance to cross over. Even if it’s only a window, we’ll take it.”

  A window.

  He’d take it.

  I wished I wasn’t imagining the moment when Oliver would leave me. I really wished that wasn’t my first thought. I felt ashamed of being so selfish, so self absorbed in my own impending grief.

  “Uh… Everly?” Jet interrupted warily. “You want to fill me in on the conversation? It sounds like something I should be in on. Like it could be important or something.”

  I swallowed down my own thoughts and pushed them away. It would be bad enough dealing with the goodbye when it came. If I dwelled on it now, it would only make it that much worse.

  My attention roamed to Jet. “Vanquishing the demon might give us a window of opportunity while Kostucha is out for the count. The spirits can try to cross over before he finds his way back from Hell.”

  Jet rubbed at his tired eyes as he processed the information. He had no idea of the storm of emotions coursing through me.

  Good.

  I didn’t want anyone knowing how conflicted I was at helping the spirits. I mean, there was no way I could let them stay in a constant state of stasis. At least I was better than that. But losing Oliver was going to be… painful.

  A pain like I had never known before.

  Nothing I could tell myself would be able to prepare myself for that.

  “I’ve found a few references to vanquishing,” Jet started. His eyes were red now, bloodshot. I wondered how much sleep he had actually managed on my cold concrete floor. “We can probably work out how to do it by finding the common theme to the different methods.”

  “You mean bring the process into the twenty-first century,” I suggested lightly. This was all new to Jet too and he was trying hard. So, so hard.

  I was glad he was there.

  The thought hit me like a truck, its truth radiating through me.

  I was glad Jet was helping me in the stuffy room full of books on the paranormal.

  It was official. The sky was falling.

  “I’ll start putting together a list,” Jet said decisively. “Do you have something to write on?”

  “No. But do not tear out any pages from the books.” I could practically feel the disapproval oozing through the walls from the librarian. Even though I couldn’t see her, I knew she wouldn’t be too far away.

  “Good thing I’ve got a good memory,” Jet muttered under his breath as he got to work.

  Oliver looked at me expectantly. “I wish I could do more to help.”

  If his hands could actually hold onto the pages of a book, I had no doubt Oliver would be putting everything he had into the research. As it was, he was pretty much useless.

  “It’s okay. You don’t have to hang around if you’re needed elsewhere,” I replied, trying to put every piece of sincerity I had into my words. I didn’t want him to feel bad because none of it was his fault.

  He stepped backwards, ready to leave. “I’ll check back in a little while. Good luck.”

  I watched as he disappeared into nothing and returned to my book. Looking for vanquishing now instead of solely focusing on killing demons, I found many more references than I had all morning.

  In a book titled ‘Monsters and Habitats’, there was nothing on demons themselves but they did talk about Hell a lot. According to the handwritten text, Hell was a physical place that could be visited by all supernatural creatures that were created there.

  And only the worst of creatures came from Hell.

  So they could travel back and forth but not be sealed there unless vanquished by a being of light. I assumed that meant an angel but it wasn’t clear. All I knew was that if we needed the services of an angel, we were never going to get rid of Kostucha.

  My belief in angels died with all the adults.

  Even they didn’t stick around after the Event.

  The most interesting part of the entry was the reference to Hell being below. When I imagined the fiery depths of Hell, I always pictured it to be below Heaven. The good went up, the evil went down.

  In the center of creation, the creatures of darkness live. They are trapped eternally, surrounded by nothing but mass and the dirt of their filth.

  The way the book was talking about it made it seem different. Like it wasn’t a figurative below, but an actual below. Like Hell was below earth. If Heaven was in the sky, then Hell was underfoot.

  Beneath.

  Underground.

  “Come and look at this,” Jet said, pulling me from my thoughts. I closed the book and replaced it on the shelves. All talk of Hell was irrelevant. I was trying to put a demon there, not visit the place myself.

  Jet showed me a passage about taking on a demon. It was a warning not to, mainly. However it did give a lot of information about what to do once it was in front of you.

  “This method has been in a few different books,” he started. “I think it’s worth a shot.”

  I nodded and tried to memorize all the details. It would have been so much easier just to tear out the page. But if I did that, I probably wouldn’t make it out of the library alive for a second time.

  Jet and I spent most of the day in the small library room. It was warmer than anywhere else I normally dwelled during the day so at least it had that going for it. It also had the added bonus of making me forget about the constant hunger that lived deep within my belly.

  We each memorized details on vanquishing and put together somewhat of a plan. There was no way for us to know whether it would work or not, or if Kostucha would have a chance to kill us before we could finish it, but that would all have to be worried about later.

  Emerging mid-afternoon, it was nice to see the snow have a break in its perpetual falling. The ice along the streets was nothing more than slush, melting in the dull wintery sun. For once, the wind wasn’t forcing a chill into my bones.

  It was almost… pleasant.

  “Hey, Jet,” a boy called out across the street. He was puffing, like he had been running a long distance. “Perry is looking for you. She said to tell you to hurry back to the tunnels.”

  “Thanks, Jorge,” Jet called back, waving his acknowledgement. The boy slowed his pace to walk away. His gaze returned to me. “I need to get back. Do you want to come? I can stock you up with supplies while I’m there.”

  As much as I didn’t want to accept anything that would take food away from others, I was curious about what was going on back in the tunnels. I found myself nodding and we moved as quickly as possible to the underground in a slow jog so we didn’t slip over.

  Nobody was guarding the tunnel entrance which was the first sign of something going on down below. I had never seen it completely devoid of people before.

  Jet must have been thinking the same thing. When we stepped into the darkness, he grabbed my hand so we wouldn’t lose each other in th
e darkness and rushed through the long corridors. I desperately tried to keep up with him but couldn’t stop the few times I stumbled.

  Those tunnels were darker than darkness itself.

  I wondered how long it would take to get used to them the way Jet and the mole people did. Walking through the tunnels was nothing to them, as easy as moving in the sunshine.

  The noise echoing off the walls told me we were getting close to the reason for Perry’s concern. Noises were bouncing around us, voices of those panicked.

  “What’s going on?” I asked.

  “I have no idea,” Jet replied in the darkness. He squeezed my hand in reassurance.

  Something told me I should be running in the opposite direction.

  Chapter Twelve

  The commotion was coming from the cavern deep within the heart of the tunnels. Jet released me from his strong grip when we had to move single file along the pathway down to the pit where the adults lived.

  It was chaotic to say the least.

  Adults and mole people weaved through each other as they tried to make sense of what was going on. Some of the adults were once again gripping their heads with pain and screaming in agony.

  I knew what they were feeling.

  And I would want to die too if I heard it again.

  They were writhing in pain as the kids did their best to comfort them. Nothing could be done for them, though. Somewhere, Kostucha would be laughing at the pain he was inflicting. He was probably dancing with delight as he tasted the chaos he was causing.

  We reached the bottom of the cavern and joined in the melee. Jet kept an eye on me as he moved to a woman crouched on the ground. He gently rubbed her back, trying to get her to come back to him.

  It didn’t work.

  I knew it wouldn’t.

  He still tried though. The same way he had tried to comfort me when I experienced that horrible skull-shattering sound.

  All of a sudden, one of the male adults stood up. His face was contorted into one of pure agony. He ran at the pathway, not slowing down even though the ascent was steep. His shoeless feet pounded on the dirt, propelling him forward faster than any of us could have expected.