Christmas in a Cowboy's Arms
Page 43
“I tried to hide it as long as I could.” Her voice lowered and her expression softened as she stared at the flames burning steady in her hearth. “But I was so happy. From the second I knew of Stella’s existence, I cherished her.” She paused to sip her coffee, both hands wrapped around the steaming mug. “Unfortunately, people in town did not have the same reaction, as you can imagine.
“Freemen used my disgrace as further ammunition against me and my family. Luke got in so many fights he was perpetually black and blue. And Mama…” She glanced down at her lap. “Mama couldn’t take the strain of everything coming at her from Freeman, from the townsfolk, from my…situation. Her heart gave out one night while she slept.”
Warren ached for her loss at a time when she had been so vulnerable. “God, Honey, I am so sorry.”
She rushed on as though embarrassed by his sympathy. “Luke and I sold the house and left town as quick as we could, taking only what we needed. I owe so much to him for his support during those months. It was Luke who found this place and worked out a way to pay for it. There was just this cabin and the land then. But it was home, and just in time for Stella.”
She smiled. “Even with his reckless ways, Luke has a way of earning people’s loyalty.” She turned to look at him. “They are not bad men, Warren. Each of them has his own reasons for going outside the law to survive. Just as Luke and I did.”
As a doctor in one of the largest cities in the Eastern states, Warren was not as sheltered as his family had raised him to be. He had seen desperation and the human instinct for survival in some of the harshest of conditions.
He was grateful to Luke for doing what he had to provide for Honey and her baby. But it only added to the guilt and regret growing inside him as he listened to her story. He would give anything to have been able to prevent all that she had endured. She was right, he couldn’t change the past, but he could have an effect on the future.
Setting his coffee aside, he shifted from his seat until he crouched down in front of her, bracing his hands on either side of her hips.
She said nothing. Just looked at him with sad eyes, her shoulders squared and strong.
“I never stopped loving you, Honey.”
A sound caught in her throat and she shook her head wordlessly, making the rest of his words tumble out before she could try to refute him.
“I was hurt and angry and confused by the news that you married Freeman so soon after I’d left. But I never stopped loving you. I love you now, seeing what you’ve done for yourself and”—he swallowed hard around the thickness in his throat—“and for our daughter. I can’t express how much I admire the wealth of strength and love you possess.”
He lowered his head, then looked up again. The tears in her eyes nearly made it impossible for him to continue.
“I know you don’t need me, Honey. And maybe you can’t find your way to loving me again, but you should know how I feel.”
The shaking of her head got more vigorous and she rose to her feet in a rush to shove past him.
He stood and followed her into the little kitchen area. He was not going to back down until he knew for a fact she didn’t want him.
“No, Warren. You do not love me,” she said sternly as she placed her mug on the little table and turned back to face him with her arms wrapped tight around her middle. “It is your guilt talking, nothing else,” she said with a hard jut of her chin.
“That’s not true,” he argued. “Of course, I’m filled with remorse for what I couldn’t do for you, but that does not mean I don’t love you. Give me a chance to prove it.”
“Warren, I…” She couldn’t finish.
“What is it, Honey?”
She took a breath, but didn’t answer.
He closed the distance between them and took her face in his hands, forcing her to meet his gaze.
“I know you feel something for me, Honey. I cannot believe that this longing in my heart does not fill yours, that this fire rolling through me does not burn through you as well.”
He saw the flicker of response in her eyes, felt her body swaying forward. He ran his thumbs along the stubborn line of her jaw. His gaze dropped to her lips and he murmured, “Tell me you don’t want me to kiss you right now.”
Her lips parted and her breath came swift.
Warren eased closer until their bodies pressed full length to each other. He could feel her heartbeat and the unsteady rhythm of her breath.
“Tell me you feel nothing,” he murmured, “and I will let it be.”
Her eyelashes fluttered and the corner of her mouth curled unexpectedly. “Somehow I doubt that,” she whispered. “But this—whatever this is still between us—is not enough. Too much time has passed. Too much has changed.”
“I don’t believe that,” he said. The words were gruff with emotion. “Give us another chance.”
She met his eyes steadily. “What happens when Stella comes to love you and you decide to go back East? I won’t let her experience that heartbreak and I can’t go through it again.”
She was scared.
He was scared too, but he wasn’t about to let it stop him.
“Nothing could take me from either of you,” he vowed. “Not ever again.”
He brushed his thumb once more over her cheek before he lowered his head. Warren put everything he had into that kiss, holding her face in his hands as he swept his tongue past her teeth to taste her deepest desires and claim her every wishful breath.
He wanted this. Her. Forever.
Only when the kiss had made them both breathless, and he felt her hands clutching at his shoulders as she moved intently against him, did he pause, easing the pressure of his mouth just enough to murmur against her lips, “Please say you’ll marry me.”
She pulled back with a gasp of surprise. Her eyes were wide and her lips parted in stunned silence. Warren took the opportunity to step back and fetch the small box he had tucked into the pocket of his coat.
“I bought this the first week I was back in Boston. I had expected to give it to you years ago, but perhaps you’ll accept it now as my Christmas gift.”
He opened the jeweler’s box to show her a ring with five amethysts interspersed with tiny diamonds set along a gold band. The center stone was the largest, with those extending to each side gradually decreasing in size.
“Marry me, Honey.”
She silently shook her head from side to side, but one of her hands lifted toward the ring.
Warren caught that wayward hand and took the ring from the box to slip it onto her finger. She didn’t resist, and his heart began to sing.
Then she stuttered, “Marry you…I…but this is our home. I can’t take Stella away from the only family she’s ever known.”
“Then I will come to live with you here.”
She blinked at that. “In this little cabin?”
“Why not?” Warren glanced around. “We might want to add on another bedroom in the spring, but otherwise it’s perfect.”
“But your practice in Chester Springs…”
“I can make a trip to town a few times a month to see to people’s needs. If that isn’t enough, I will find a replacement.”
“Being a doctor is all you ever wanted.”
“Not all,” he said with a smile, drawing her into his arms. “And right now, this is more important. I’ll find a way to work out the doctoring bit.”
“But Stella…she will have so many questions.”
“We have all night to figure out how best to explain things to her.”
“My brother—”
“Will have to accept it,” he stated.
She fell silent.
“Any more concerns?” He kept his tone light though his insides were churning.
Her eyes glistened with emotion as she stared at him for a long moment.
Then she released a slow breath.
“Just one,” she admitted as she brought her arms up to encircle his neck. The smile curving her lips made his heart skip a beat and his blood run swift. “I do not have a gift for you.”
“I cannot imagine a better Christmas gift than having you and Stella in my life.” His arms tightened around her. “Forever.”
“Then forever it is,” she said before she rose up on her toes to seal her promise with a kiss.
About the Author
Amy Sandas’s love of romance began one summer when she stumbled across one of her mother’s Barbara Cartland books. Her affinity for writing began with sappy preteen poems and led to a bachelor’s degree with an emphasis on creative writing from the University of Minnesota Twin Cities. She lives with her husband and children in northern Wisconsin. Visit her website at amysandas.com.
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Houston Legend swore he’d never love again, but with the future of his family’s ranch on the line, he heads to the altar to marry a woman he’s never met.
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The last thing outlaw Luke Weston needs is more trouble. But when he stumbles upon a kidnapped young woman, he’ll face any odds to keep the delicate beauty safe.
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Tougher in Texas
Rodeo producer Cole Jacobs has his hands full running Jacobs Livestock. So when he loses one of his cowboys and his cousin sends along a more-than-capable replacement, he expects a grizzled Texas good ol’ boy. He gets Shawnee Pickett.
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