by Gray, A L
"Please believe me when I tell you that you didn't kill her, please, Elijah." I plea, tears still in my eyes.
He looks down at me with damp eyes, his pain written all over his face. "You sound so sure that I didn't kill her."
"Because you didn't. I don't want you blaming yourself after today. Your Mother would be turning in her grave if she knew how you have punished yourself."
He gasps loudly. He takes my wrist tenderly while swallowing hard. "Thank you." He whispers.
"For what?" I ask confused.
"For saving me."
I pull him into my arms and hold him tightly in our embrace, my arms around his neck, his face firmly between my cheek and shoulder.
"I will always be here for you, you don't need to thank me for anything." I whisper. "We need each other, Elijah, we need each other's support and love. We shouldn't thank one another, we should just keep pushing forward. The slate is now clean."
I feel him smile against my cheek. "That sounds like a really good idea."
"Of course it does." I try to joke to lighten the mood. "Now, let's go home and start again, no secrets, no lies - just us."
WE ARE BACK AT HOME, parked on his stony driveway in the darkness of the car. He's silent, he's been silent the entire drive home - I have also, but I feel he is mentally somewhere else. He's been on his phone texting most of the time. I told him to stop, that it isn't safe to drive and text, but as usual, Elijah Darks listens to no man. For some reason, I feel... better. It's a strange feeling, like, I know him for the first time. His life has been dark, too dark for someone like me, but I feel like now, we can be together and have no secrets, just be happy.
"Anile, I have a surprise for you." He says without looking at me.
"Oh? A good one, or a bad one?" I ask in a low voice.
He turns slightly and smiles. "A very good one that I know will make you happy. Go inside," he points towards his front door, "I'll wait out here."
I frown. "Why won't you come with me?"
"You will want to be alone for this, trust me." He arches a perfect eyebrow at me.
Trust me, the words make me shiver inside. I do trust him, with my life. I smile sweetly.
"Okay. See you soon." I joke.
He laughs a little. "See you soon, Princess."
I step out of the car feeling nervous. What kind of surprise would require me to be alone? Probably another BDSM lesson, but instead of Elijah, he has invested in a real teacher! I shake my head at the thought. I make my way across the stony driveway, the stones scratching against my shoes. I get inside and slowly walk into the living room. It smells like freshly baked bread, hmmm. It reminds me of being a child. I gaze around and see nothing. The lights on the walls in the colossal living area are low, the fire is burning, the music is off - the house is vacant. I frown and collect my phone from my pocket. I scroll through my I Phone and search for Elijah's number, and just as I am about to press call, I hear her.
"Anile."
Chapter Eight
HER VOICE! I gasp for breath. I swallow hard as tears start to beat down my face. Slowly, I stare over into the kitchen and see her, standing like an angel leaning against the countertop, dressed completely in white - she's wearing her creaseless trousers from the clinic.
"Mum?" I sob. I seize my mouth in shock. I want to run to her, but I cannot, I'm stuck where I stand. "Is that really you?"
She smiles tenderly, and I gaze at her cheek dimples. "It is, Sweetheart."
I start to blink rapidly, I don't know what to do, what to say! My entire body starts to prick uncontrollably.
"Anile." She whispers. "You are so beautiful, as I imagined you would be."
With slow calculated steps, I manage to move towards her. Her hair, it's so long and thick, and so blonde, blonder than I remember. It's all the way down to her backside - she looks like an angel with ice blue eyes to match my own, surrounded by long, platinum lashes. I reach her toe to toe. I cannot help but stare at her. It's been years since I have laid eyes on my beautiful Mother.
"Mum." I start to sob.
She immediately takes me in her arms, and crushes me in a tight embrace. I fall into her, tears at war, body trembling. I cannot believe she is here.
"Mum. I miss you." I cry.
"Oh Sweetheart, I miss you too, so much." She kisses my head and a feeling of reality takes a hold, a feeling of a Mothers' love.
I fall harder into her embrace - my body is weak - and she forces us to sink to the ground. I'm between her legs like a little child, head on her chest. I grasp her arms tightly and smell her. She smells like flowers, fresh, tangy, and sweet. I cannot stop smelling her. I move my hands all over her, touching her hair, her back, her arms. She feels like home.
"Mum, I've needed you, so badly." I cry.
"Sweetheart, I know. I'm here now and I'm not going anywhere."
She casts her hands over my hair, slowly and delicately. "You feel so real." She says in a broken voice. She stuffs her head into my hair. "I'm sorry, Anile, I'm sorry that I haven't been able to take care of you as a Mother should." She starts to cry.
I pull back from her. I peer up at her and narrow my eyes at her. "No, Mum, no! Don't you blame yourself. This was all father."
She takes my face in her hands and I just bask in her grip; her hands are so warm. I close my eyes. "Mum, I love you so much."
"I love you too, Anile."
I quickly look up at her. "How did you, how did you get out?"
She smiles sweetly. "Elijah." She whispers.
I look away in dismay. "Elijah," I say breathlessly, "he, he got you out? I thought there were observations, tests that needed to be done?"
"No Anile," she pauses for a moment, "he paid for my release with the last of his money."
"Last of his money? He's rich Mum, rich as hell." I quickly cast my mind back - he isn't rich, his father took it all.
"No, he isn't. His father took all that away when he found out that you were..." She cannot even mention my pregnancy. Her face is pained, her eyes are haunted - she's shattered by my pain.
I cannot believe he spent the last of his money on my Mother. I clutch at my tummy, my love for him actually hurts. I try to swallow.
"How much?" I ask.
"Anile, that is not important."
"Mum, please." I beg. "How much?"
I want to know, I want to know if it was just a small amount or if he really did pay the last of his fortune to save my Mother.
She cannot look me in the eye, she stares past me and gazes around the house.
"This house, plus," she lowers her head in shame, "ten-million."
"Please tell me you are joking?" I gasp.
She shakes her head promptly. "No Anile, I'm not. Your father had it set in his will that you are not mentally stable enough to make decisions regarding my welfare. He had his friend Doctor as my next of kin. But as you know, the Darks men tend to be very persuasive."
"That Bastard!" I snap.
"Anile, don't swear!" She admonishes.
Although I'm totally pissed at my father, I smile, I smile at her Motherly duty being taken seriously.
"What's so funny?" She asks.
I peer up at her, she's frowning. "Nothing, I just miss you being Motherly."
She pulls me close again and cuddles me. I exhale and just feel... happy, I feel happy again. It's alien to me, but I want this feeling to last - it won't last though. I now have the matter of Elijah's house to worry about.
"Come, Anile. We need to talk." She says as she pulls me to my feet with her; I go willingly.
We make our way over to the sofas. I remove the tons of cushions so we can get comfy, pushing them up against the arms of the sofa. Once we are seated, I just stare at her.
"You know Mum, you haven't aged a day." I smile fondly.
"That's good to know. I feel eighty inside." She rolls her eyes.
Her words hurt. My happy expression fades.
She offers a sympathetic hand on
my knee. "Sweetheart, it's a figure of speech."
I smile and gaze down at her hand.
"Mum, when did Elijah confirm the... when did he get you released?"
"Tonight, about an hour ago."
I stare in a daze. That's when I was in the forbidden room! He was scared that I would leave him and yet, he still spent the rest of his money, and his home, to get my Mother released! Oh my God!
"Are you okay?"
"Yes," I shake my head firmly, trying to rid it of shock," Mum, I just need to go get Elijah."
"Okay, Sweetheart."
I rise to my feet and freeze, my heart is pounding. Elijah is hovering in the archway into his living area. I stare over at him, appreciative, fondly. He smiles wide, he's happy. I tilt my head to one side and take mental inventory of the man that I love, the man that I know would do anything for me.
"Elijah." I breathe.
He starts to walk towards me but I run, I run right into his arms. I wrap my arms around him so tight that he tells me.
"Anile, I cannot breathe."
I giggle. "Oh, I do love you, so much." I whisper.
He cups the back of my head and grasps my hair tenderly, ordering my eyes to meet his. "I love you too, Anile."
"I know you do." I say breathlessly.
He kisses my temple. "Come, we have much to discuss."
He slides his hand down my neck, down my arm and when he reaches my hand, he entwines our fingers together. He takes me back to the sofa. I sit down but he doesn't, he just stares down at my Mother.
"Hello, Fraya." He says kindly, his warm blue eyes crinkled at the edges.
I watch them both, they look as though they know one another. My Mother rises to her feet and takes Elijah in her arms.
"Hello, Elijah." She says in almost a whisper. "Thank you, thank you for saving me."
"I told you that I would always help you. I am a man of my word."
They pull back from one another and seat themselves either side of me. I have a strange feeling that he was not just her lawyer - they just seem as though they know one another too well.
I look at my Mother. "Do you two know each other?" I ask serious.
"Anile, Elijah has been taking care of me for years. He writ to me every week, and he paid the staff at the clinic to treat me well." She stares past me and eyes him fondly.
A warm feeling fills my tummy. I cannot believe that all these years he has taken care of her.
"You are the son I never had, Elijah. Thank you for everything."
"You are welcome, Fraya."
I gaze up at Elijah. He's such a good man, and I am so lucky to have found him.
"Elijah," I take his hand, "your house." I whisper.
"I'd sell everything to make you happy, Anile."
"You have." I say shamefully.
"It was worth every penny to see you happy."
I look up at him. To my utter shock, he looks happy, truly happy that he was able to make me happy.
"Anile," my Mother says, "we need to discuss you. How you are feeling, how you are coping. Elijah and I need to make sure you are okay."
I frown. "I'm fine."
"Please do not try to deceive me, Sweetheart. I know everything that has happened to you." She says serious.
I release Elijah's hand and sit back between them both. "Mum, I'm fine. I am. I'm happy you are home, and I'm happy Elijah is here. I have everything I need. Now, I just need to buy us all somewhere to live. I am not going back to fathers' house."
"Princess, don't worry about a place to live. I have some assets that I need to sell and then I will sort all that out for you and your Mother."
I quickly burst forward. "Elijah, I have all my fathers' money. You don't have to sell anything else. The only thing you need to do is take control of the businesses. I have no idea where to start."
I rise to my feet. I need to look at them both, I feel on trial squished between them.
"Anile, I have already told you. The Gooden Law Firms are running like clockwork. You don't need to worry. But please let me make this clear to you, I am not living off of your money."
"Elijah-"
"No, Anile. I won't do that." He snaps.
My Mother leans forward, elbows rested on her knees. "Anile, listen to him. If he wants to earn his own money, you cannot be the one to stop him."
"Mum, I am not trying to stop him, I'm trying to reassure him."
"Fraya, could you give us a moment, please?" Elijah asks.
I stand with crossed arms and pace the rug in front of them. God he can be so annoying with his pride! My Mother gracefully rises to her feet, smiles at us both and leaves down the hallway that leads to my greenhouse room. Once my Mother has left the room, Elijah rises to his feet.
"Anile-"
"No, Elijah." I take his hands in mine. "Don't you see? We have a chance to start fresh. All that evil money from the Freemasons or whatever, it's gone. We can start again. I want to start again!" I beg.
"Anile calm down." He slides out from my grip and holds me at arms length. "It is not that simple. The cult, they won't just allow me to leave!" He says serious. "I need to smooth things out with my father, I have no other choice, I cannot risk you or your Mother."
"I'm not scared of them, Elijah. I've been through too much to ever be frightened of anyone." I force.
"You should be. Fear is sometimes a good thing. They are dangerous, Anile. They will come at me one way or another. I haven't attended a meeting for months. I have voicemails, letters, threatening letters, all from my leader. I have no other choice."
"Elijah, you cannot go back to them."
"Princess," he takes my face in his hands, "it's not real for me anymore. I won't allow myself to get mentally sucked in."
"You promised, you promised you wouldn't do anything like that anymore." I start to sob.
"I promised I wouldn't do anything dark, and I won't."
Tears dress my face, they are cold tears. I'm scared, scared for him.
"Let's leave." I say in a panic. "This house is gone, you no longer work at Darks Lawyers. Let's leave and start again? Please?" I beg.
"Anile, they will find me, I cannot be the one that leaves."
"What do you mean? You cannot be the one that leaves?" He doesn't answer me and I start to tremble. This is dangerous if he is scared. What the hell can I do to save him from them?
"Elijah, please tell me what I can do to save you?"
He smiles tenderly and grazes my forehead with his soft lips. "You have saved me, and I will be forever grateful." He whispers.
"No."I sob into his hands.
He pulls me into a tight embrace and holds me for so long my legs start to ache. I grasp his neck and try to let go of everything dark and dangerous, but it's hard. I want today to last, my Mother is home, Elijah and I are together, why can't my happiness last for more than five minutes? I inhale deeply, my nose pushed hard against his chest. He smells so good, musky and sweet, he's home to me. I run my hands down his back and clutch at his jeans. I feel something in his back pocket, a photo, I think. I steal it from his pocket. I pull back from him and eye the photo. My eyes are wide, this is a photo of me, one that Derek took. We were at university, and I look pale and red eyed and totally hungover, sitting on the perfectly mowed lawn in front of our tutors classroom. The day was sunny, as I remember. I was so hot that I almost passed out, so Derek took me outside to grab some fresh air - hence me sitting on the grass.
"Where did you get this?"
"I took that from Derek when we were in Egypt."
"I look disgusting in this photo."
"You look beautiful and sweet." He takes it from me and casts his fingers over it fondly. "I like this photo of you, you look... carefree. I have never seen you like this."
"Elijah -" I say, but I have no words.
"It's okay." He whispers.
"No, it isn't." I *sigh* heavily. "We have been through a lot, Elijah. We will have happy times like this, one day."<
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He exhales sharply. "You know, sometimes, I sit back and wonder how happy you would have been if I just left you alone, if I never gave you that job."
"Elijah, I would never have been able to love someone the way I love you. Whether it came good or bad, it's worth it," I take his hand and place it flat over my heart, "this, this is worth it."
He frowns. "But I have taken everything from you."
"No you haven't." I urge.
"Anile, come on. You have lost your strength because of me. My brother tormented you, took Sophie from you. I robbed you of your innocence, treated you badly at times. You have suffered, because of me!" He says serious. He pulls his hand free from mine.
"Elijah, please don't do this." I beg. "Not tonight."
"No, Anile." He turns his back on me. I try to walk in front of him but he keeps turning away from me. "I have thought long and hard about this, and I spoke to Amin about it while I waited in the car. He agrees."
I gasp annoyed, a growl lingering on my tongue. "Agrees with what?"
He takes a steely breath. "I want you and your Mother to leave London, leave me, start again, and be happy."
Chapter Nine
"ARE YOU FUCKING CRAZY?"
He swiftly turns and faces me with serious, deep blue eyes. "Anile, calm down." He orders.
"No, I won't calm down." I am shocked, utterly shocked. "You were telling me we could have another baby, you love me," I narrow my eyes at him, "you love me! Why would you - why are you saying this? Just hours ago you feared I would leave you."
"I love you enough to let you go, Anile. It's the right thing to do."
I run towards him, and in a frenzy, I grasp both his hands. "Look, it's just nerves. It's just nerves." I swallow hard while pacing the pads of my thumbs across his knuckles. "You don't mean this."
"Princess, it's the only way to insure your safety."
"Why would you show me all your darkness? Why would you tell me we can start again if this is your agenda?"
"That was before I had time to think, before I spoke to Amin." He lowers his gaze and just stares impassively at our hands. "When you were in the forbidden room, I was desperately thinking how I could keep you safe and make you happy. That's when I decided to do everything I could to get your Mother freed. When I had confirmation of her release, my mind went into overdrive. It was only when we were parked outside here I thought that maybe you would be happier and safer without me. That's why I called Amin to see if he agrees."