Forever Touched

by Lilly Wilde

“I’d like that,” he replied.

  “And it seemed as though the Christmas letter was something very meaningful to you, so maybe we can add it to our list of Christmas traditions,” I said.

  “Let’s do that. And hey, although Lyric can’t read, we can start writing some to him, and when he’s older, he’ll have them,” Aiden said.

  “I love that idea.”

  “I love you,” he said.

  “As you should,” I replied, with a grin. “So this year is my turn to write a letter so I can catch up with you.”

  “So we’re taking turns?” he asked.

  “Next year, and going forward, we’ll both write one. But this year, it’s all about you.”

  He grinned. “I’ll take it. I love when you make things all about me.”

  “I know you do. Spoiled much?”

  “Nah. Just madly in love with my wife.”

  *****

  It was late Christmas Eve. Aiden and I were sitting near the tree. Lyric was already asleep, so it was mommy and daddy time.

  “So …”

  “Yes?” Aiden asked.

  I reached behind one of the pillows on the sofa and pulled out an envelope. “This is for you.”

  “My letter?” he asked.

  “Yes.”

  He placed his drink on the table and unsealed the envelope.

  I sat back and watched his expression as he read.

  My dearest Aiden,

  This year has been riddled with challenges and sprinkled with unimaginable joy. My time with you has been the ride of my life. We’ve committed ourselves to forever, and as I sit here writing this letter, I realize that will never be enough.

  You’ve given me a world I would have never imagined … one I never knew I wanted. You’ve shown me a version of love I thought no longer existed. It’s a love I hope to show our children, minus the horrible mistakes, hopefully, but the truth of love all the same.

  When we were apart, I prayed every night. I prayed for you. I prayed for us. There were times when I didn’t think we could co-exist, let alone marry and have a family, but deep down, I always knew there was no way either of us could be without the other. It says a lot that even in the midst of our sadness, our anger, and our pain that we never lost sight of our love. We don’t always do things the right way, but I don’t think there is a right way, to be honest. We just need to do things our way, because—oddly enough— that seems to work for us.

  I want you now until the end of time. I’ll never stop craving the heat of your touch, the velvet of your voice, the feel of your skin on mine. Thank you for making my life something I never thought it could be. Thank you for giving me a family again. And thank you for loving me so fiercely. My Christmas wish is for you … for us. My wish is that nothing in this world or the next will keep us apart. With everything in me … I love you. And you’ll have my love until the end of time. Forever I’m yours. Forever I do. Merry Christmas, my love.

  Now until forever.

  Your loving wife,

  Aria

  He folded the letter and returned it to the envelope, and then with glistening eyes, he looked up at me. “Of all the Christmas letters I’ve ever received, this is the one I will cherish most.”

  “I love you so much … sometimes it hurts at just how much.”

  “Come here, baby,” he said, pulling me into his arms.

  “Sometimes it’s hard to believe this is our life.”

  “Well, it is … now until forever. Remember?”

  “I’m going to hold you to that,” I said.

  “I know. I’m counting on it.”

  *****

  I didn’t have a chance the previous year, but somehow in the midst of even more chaos, I’d managed to squeeze in some time to not only start, but finish handmade gifts. And for some reason, the excitement of our second Christmas exceeded that of our previous year. This one seemed more cemented somehow. Like my love for Aiden and his for me, our family was permanent.

  “Are you ready for your Christmas present?” Aiden asked.

  “I don’t know. What is it? A small country?”

  He chuckled. “No, that’s slated for next Christmas.”

  “In that case, I think I’m ready.”

  “You’ll need your coat and gloves. Come.” He grasped my hand and tugged me behind him.

  My insides tingled as Aiden led me, his hands covering my eyes, to my gift. The neighing of the horses sounded in the distance. We were headed toward the stables. Had he bought me a saddle? Or maybe his surprise was a sleigh ride.

  After several more anxious steps, we stopped, and he said, “Okay, open your eyes.”

  “Finally.” I blinked a few times and a wide grin spread across my lips. “Gorgeous,” I breathed.

  A beautiful white mare, fully saddled and adorned with a bright red bow, was standing in front of the wooden fence.

  “You’re smiling,” Aiden said. “That means I did good.”

  “You always do good, baby. I love her already.”

  “Remember when you tossed up every excuse you could think of to avoid riding? I knew you’d come to love it as much as I do.”

  I stepped closer to my gift. “So why not get me a stallion? Didn’t think I could handle it?” I asked with a smirk.

  “Do you think you can handle it?” he asked.

  “I think I do quite well with your horse Sebastian, and there’s also that something-something I do with a stallion of a different type.” I winked at him. “I hear I’m quite proficient.”

  “That you are,” he replied.

  “So what’s the deal, my giver-of-gifts?” I asked.

  “Sebastian has been well-trained. So has your horse, but not to the degree that Sebastian has, and given the time constraints, a mare will keep my mind at ease.”

  “I see.”

  “What is it?” he asked once I’d become quiet.

  “If you did this to make everything okay with your behavior at the party the other night, it’s not going to work,” I said.

  “This gift has nothing to do with that. On our honeymoon, I told you I had a host of gifts for you. Did you forget?”

  “Hmm. You did say that, didn’t you?” I reached for one of the apples and held it out for my horse.

  “Yes, I did. A few things between us slowed some of my plans, but now it’s full steam ahead. So it looks like someone owes someone else an apology.”

  “I’m sorry. But you have to admit, you are known for using over-the-top means to get me to come your way on things.”

  “Guilty as charged.”

  “So are we going for a ride?” I asked.

  Aiden removed the bow from the horse and said, “That’s the plan, but you need to give her a name first.”

  “That’s right. Let’s see. She looks like a unicorn,” I said, giggling. “How about Mystic?”

  His brows scrunched. “What else you got?”

  “Hmm. What do you think about Serenity?”

  “Nah,” he said, shaking his head.

  “It’s my horse. I should choose whatever name I want.”

  “True.”

  “I think I’ve got it,” I said. “Savannah.”

  “Savannah,” he repeated. “I think it’s perfect. I know you wanted a white Christmas, and now each time you ride Savannah, you’ll have one.”

  “You.”

  “What?” he asked.

  “You tend to always get a little overzealous when it comes to making me smile.”

  “That’s my job,” he said, his gaze warm on my face. “I’d brave the oceans for you. If I could bring you the moon, I would.”

  “I love you. You … not all this. I want you to know that. I don’t need diamonds. I don’t need jets, islands, or horses. All I need is you.”

  “And you have me … always.”

  Aiden helped me mount the horse, and I waited as he joined me on his.

  “Nothing fast,” Aiden said. “We don’t want to scare the baby.”
>
  We started off with a slow walk over the riding grounds as I introduced myself to Savannah. Light flutters of snow floated around us as we reached the far end of the property—Aiden and I smiling and laughing as we enjoyed the picture perfection of a wintry afternoon.

  *****

  “Aiden, put me down.” I was in the middle of my last trimester, and I was barely allowed to walk—he was back to carrying me everywhere. If it hadn’t been so adorable, it would have been ridiculous. At the slightest sign of discomfort, he was there. No matter how insane my food cravings, he prepared or had someone on standby to have it at my fingertips in no time. He attended every prenatal visit and he oversaw the design for the new nursery.

  I was still allowed to work—primarily from home. And I was managing pretty well, except on those days when Aiden’s watchful eye made it a bit too much. And then there was my little Lyric. He was two years old now, and the terrible twos were in full effect. I would wager all I had that this stage of his development was intensified by the Raine blood running through his veins. And then there was the refereeing between Aiden and his sisters. He was still wearing the big brother cape, and from time to time, I had to rip it off. Other than juggling my modified schedule and engaging with our loved ones, I guess you could say my life was running on its normal frequency—chaos. But I wouldn’t have changed it for anything in the world. I was happy in a whole new way. The puzzle that was once Aria Cason had been completed.

  “Did you hear me?” I asked in protest.

  Aiden kissed my cheek. “I’m making it easier for you.”

  “I can walk.”

  He let out a sigh as he considered my request, and then shook his head. “Next time, okay?”

  I rolled my eyes. “You don’t need to keep doing this. I’m fine.”

  He walked me over to the bed. “Aria, I like taking care of you.”

  Instead of telling him he didn’t have to—per my usual—I said, “I love knowing you’re always here to take care of me.”

  Surprise reached his eyes as he considered my response, and then he smiled. “But within limits.”

  “Yes, within limits,” I repeated, pleased by his understanding.

  I settled in bed and Aiden snuggled up close behind me, his hand resting on my belly. “I still can’t believe it—twins.”

  “I’m still in shock myself,” I said. “So is my body.”

  “Are they misbehaving already?” he asked, his hand moving over my stomach, quieting his babies’ misconduct.

  I grinned. “They’re your offspring, so of course they are.”

  Once we’d made it past the first trimester, we’d shared our news with family and friends and then, of course, the public. Approving press releases about my personal life had become another layer to which I had to adjust. Due to the miscarriage, Aiden had been very concerned about the likelihood of a full-term pregnancy, and I’d been just as worried. He’d gone back to his medical journals, met with physicians who specialized in high-risk pregnancies, and had even gone as far as flying in a couple of them to consult on my pregnancy.

  He’d been a box of nerves the first few weeks after we found out about the twins, not allowing me to do much more than lie in bed and put on weight. I wasn’t even allowed to use the bathroom without him carrying me. He’d bathed me, dressed me, and on some days when I wasn’t up to doing it myself, he’d fed me. He’d gotten a lot less crazed during my second trimester, but as the last one was coming to a close, he was back at it. This from the man who once told me that his family’s business was his priority, that he couldn’t devote all of his time to us, and that if he could, he didn’t know if he would. Fast forward three years and look at him now. I couldn’t recall the last time he’d left my side for business or anything else.

  “Did it feel like this with Lyric?” he asked.

  “No. Not at all. I felt normal up until the last few weeks. And I had a little more wiggle room. Not like this where I feel stuffed all the time.”

  “Are you in any pain?” he asked.

  “It’s not without its moments, and the more they grow, the more the discomfort, but I’m fine. Stop worrying.”

  “Wish I could help,” he said, kissing my hair.

  “You have, so much. You’ve made every moment, since I told you, damned near perfect.”

  We were quiet for a long stretch of time. I supposed we were both looking into the future. Wondering how our lives would look when the twins arrived.

  “You know, I was thinking,” I said.

  “About?”

  “I know it’s a stretch, but if you think about it, we were all together during the first few months of my pregnancy with Lyric, just like we’ve been with the twins. Granted, neither of us knew Lyric was there with us, but looking back—we were all there. Together.”

  “A bit far-fetched—but I get what you’re saying, and it’s actually a comforting thought,” he said.

  It was important that Aiden have this time with me, with this pregnancy, but it would never make up for what he’d missed with his first born. That was a truth we’d always have to live with.

  Aiden’s hand was still moving across my stomach as he leaned in to kiss my neck. He was quiet again, though. I wondered if he was considering what I just said. Maybe I shouldn’t have mentioned that. It was always a source of pain for him, no matter what type of spin I put on it.

  “How much weight do you think you’ve gained?” he asked.

  “What?” I pushed his hand away. That was definitely not where I thought his quietness would lead.

  “Aria. Wait,” he said.

  “How dare you ask me that, you jerk!”

  He sat up behind me. “It’s not what you think.”

  “How can it not be?” I pulled myself up in bed and glared at him.

  “I was going to say, or ask rather, if you could possibly not lose all of the baby weight after the twins come.”

  “Why?” I asked.

  “Because I like it, he said, grinning. “Especially the hips and ass.”

  I giggled and laid back in bed. “You’re such a guy.” He lay behind me, and I pulled at his hand, placing it across my stomach again. I then placed my hand on top of his and closed my eyes, picturing the five of us: Aiden, Lyric, the twins and myself.

  “Everything good?” he asked, when I’d become quiet.

  I glanced over my shoulder at him and smiled. He still took my breath away. “Everything’s perfect.”

  Most people would never get Aiden. They’d never understand why I put up with him—why my love for him was infinite and irrevocable. His power, his intensity, his strength, his passion—I’d be the first to say those traits didn’t always render favorable outcomes, but all of those traits are what made him—made his energy. And until you’ve been the sole focus of all that energy, of all that power, as he embraced you in his arms and poured his heart and soul into every part of you, you never would.

  For now, everything was perfect, and I wasn’t worried anymore. I wouldn’t bother myself with what-ifs, because none of that mattered. What mattered is what I could see—what I could feel—and the rest would come. I knew that whatever Aiden and I faced, it would be together.

  Epilogue

  We’d just sat down for dinner—the kids were misbehaving. Lyric tended to always pick on his brothers. They, of course, paired up to take him on. Today’s debacle involved one of Lyric’s toys. He didn’t share very well, so when he saw Fife with his toy plane, he demanded it back. Of course, Fife refused, but not without tossing a handful of peas at his brother. Harper joined in on the fun, doubling up on Lyric as he attempted to dodge the tossed food.

  “Guys!” Aiden said. “Do you want to miss dessert?”

  “No!” they screamed in unison.

  Aiden and I stared at each other across the table, loving every bit of the chaos. The warmth of my husband’s gaze touched my skin. I had once thought falling in love was the most dangerous thing I could ever do. But every da
y since Aiden entered my life, a piece of that resolve was etched away, opening my heart to receive his. Falling in love, growing in that love and in truth was the most amazing gift, and I treasured it more and more with each passing day.

  The depth of our feelings surpassed the word love. It just didn’t seem to fit. If there was a word that described an emotion stronger than love, it would only apply to us—to what we shared. It was often said that happily ever after only existed within the pages of fairytales, but I was living mine. I reached up and placed my hand to my chest, resting it over my heart, and mouthed I love you. Aiden flashed that lopsided smile I adored and mouthed, I love you more.

  After dinner, Aiden and I were standing in the doorway of the playroom, watching over the kids as they volleyed for the controls of one of the largest train sets in the world.

  I looked up at Aiden. He was probably the happiest man on the planet. He enjoyed every minute with us, even the ones that involved all three kids crying simultaneously.

  “Your birthday’s coming up and as usual, I have no idea what to get for you,” I said.

  “And as usual, my answer is the same. He pressed his lips to my brow. “You’ve given me everything I could ever want.”

  “I’m happy that you’re happy, but you know I can’t let your day go by unnoticed. There must be something. So tell me, what can I possibly give to the man who has everything?”

  One dark brow lifted. “Anything I want?” he asked.

  “Yes. Anything. Name it … it’s yours.”

  “A daughter.”

  THE END

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