Finding Peace (Rollin On Book 4)

by Emilia Finn

  “I don’t understand.”

  “And I told you I didn’t want to talk about my family,” she returns, quietly but with heat. She turns in her chair, her thigh brushing against my knee again and I work to swallow my sandwich.

  I pour our glasses then take a long swallow of milk and wipe my chin before I speak again. We’re definitely balancing on a perilous edge. I just found her… for the third time. I don’t want to fuck it up.

  “Okay. Alright, babe. I can take a hint. What are your hobbies?”

  “Hobbies?”

  “Yep. What do you do when you’re not being spewed on?”

  “Umm… okay,” she says, smiling softly again. “I take pictures.”

  “But that’s your job.”

  “Yeah, but it’s really lucky my job is doing something I love. I love taking pictures. I love developing pictures.”

  “You develop them too?”

  “Yep, but just in black and white. I have my own dark room in my apartment.”

  “That’s cool. How does that work?”

  “Well, you just turn the lights out.”

  I shake my head. “Not even a little bit funny.” But she is. I had to work really hard to hold that laugh back. I had to bite my tongue before I spat my sandwich out.

  “It was funny. Stop being such a grump,” she says and I clamp my teeth down harder. “Okay, so I use special chemicals and stuff, and a machine thingy, like, an enlarger, with a special light. You put your photo paper under the light with the roll of film… anyway, you expose the paper to the negative, then you put the paper in the chemicals and then some water… then you watch the magic,” she finishes her totally non-technical description on a sigh.

  “The magic?”

  “The magic,” she repeats with a smile. “When you watch the blank paper change from nothing to a picture of Evie, or a picture of someone else’s baby, or a wedding. Or Kit,” she says with a sneaky smile. “It’s really cool watching it transform.”

  She really does do something she loves. I can relate to that. I love my job too.

  “I don’t get to do that so much anymore though. I mean, I do a bit, but people rarely buy physical images anymore. Everyone just wants digital.”

  I nod toward a framed black and white image of Kit, Tink, a pregnant Izzy, and Jack at the bottom of the stairs in Kit’s old place. “You do that one?”

  “Yeah, I did. That was the day of Bobby and Jim’s fights.”

  “We coulda saved a whole buncha trouble tonight if you got in that picture too. Then I wouldn’t have tried to throw you out of here.”

  She smiles boldly, tucking stray locks of hair behind her ear with her pinky finger. “I have a picture from that night with me and Evie in it too. It’s on my table at home.”

  Of course she does. Such a simple fix could have saved my balls, and as though she can read my thoughts, she winces, blushing again.

  “Did I hurt you real bad?” she asks, actually nodding at my dick then lifting her chin again suddenly realizing what she did.

  “Yeah, it hurt real bad,” I admit. “I probably won’t ever be able to have kids now.” I’m joking but she looks pained.

  “Do you want kids? No, wait! Don’t answer that,” she says, putting her hands up to actually stop me and I smile at how awkward she looks. “That’s definitely none of my business. Forget I asked and just know that I’m sorry that I threatened that future for you.”

  Shit she’s cute.

  “When was Evie born? When’s her birthday?

  “She’ll be four in September.”

  I nod, filing that information away for later. “When’s your birthday?”

  “Ah, Tina, sorry hun.”

  Tina and I both turn to the doorway, to find Kit standing there. “Evie’s asking for you.”

  Kit looks at me, apology in her eyes and I nod. She didn’t want to disturb us, and honestly, I actually forgot we weren’t here alone.

  “That’s okay, it’s getting late anyway,” Tina says. This is her saying goodbye. This is all I get tonight. “I better get her home and into her own bed.”

  Tina picks her dishes up and I find myself wondering what her bed looks like. What it smells like. How many pillows she owns, and if she goes to bed with wet hair.

  “Ah, thanks for feeding me,” she speaks softly as Kit quietly exits, leaving us alone again.

  Ask her, you pussy! Ask her for another date.

  “I’m sorry about kicking you in the… ya know.”

  Ask her.

  “I’ll, ah… I’ll see you around.”

  Ask her!

  “And I want you to know, it was nice to meet you. I’m sorry it kinda turned into a mess earlier.”

  Kiss her! “It was nice to meet you too.”

  Kiss her!

  “Good night, Aiden.”

  “Good night, Peaches.”

  Six

  Tina

  Girl Chat

  My telephone rings a few days after the Sexy Store Guy fiasco, so I pull my professional mask on, schooling my voice, donning my I’m a competent grownup act at the same time I point at Evie, giving her the mom eyes and silently telling her to stop climbing on the damn couch. She’ll break her arm one of these days. “Christina Cooper Studios, how can I help you?”

  “Hey there, Legs. Wanna come make out at my house?”

  I laugh out loud. Dropping my professional façade again, I slump against the kitchen doorway. “Hey Tink. Hold on – Evelyn, stop jumping on the couch.”

  “Ooooh, Evie baby’s in trouble,” Tink says over the line and I get the impression she’s not talking to me, confirmed when I hear someone giggling in the background. Kit maybe.

  Evie pouts, dropping her shoulders and walking around the couch, she plants herself against the wall, sliding her butt down till she’s sitting with her knees folded against her chest.

  I’ve never actually done the naughty corner, but whatever. If she wants to sit there, she can sit there.

  “What’s up, Tinkerbelle?”

  “I have an actual name, ya know. Not Tinkerbelle. ”

  “I know.” I smile because I know she has a grudge against her nickname simply out of principle. If anyone else had coined the name she’d probably buy embroidered shirts, but because it was Bobby’s idea, she hates it. “But I like Tink.”

  “I don’t doubt it,” she grumbles. She teases everyone else mercilessly, it’s nice that she finally met her match in Bobby. “Anyway, we’re having a girl’s night. Come on over.”

  “Um, no,” I tell her, losing my smile and feeling the blush creep into my cheeks. “Last time I came over, I got into a fist fight with Aiden – effing – Kincaid and nearly got bodily removed from the premises.”

  “He’s not here.”

  “I’ve heard that before,” I shoot back.

  “Honest, he and the other guys are at camp. Jack’s with them too.”

  “Camp?” Images of the Kincaid men sitting around a campfire and toasting marshmallows fill my brain. It doesn’t feel right.

  “Not like camping camp, but like fight camp. Just tonight. They left this morning, they’ll be with a bunch of snotty kids overnight, teach them some moves, then they’ll come home tomorrow.”

  “Snotty kids?” I ask, finding my smile again at the disdain in her voice.

  “I mean, Evie and Bean are cool, but the rest…” she finishes with an ‘ick’ noise and I laugh.

  “So it’s a penile free zone?” I absolutely don’t want to risk running into Aiden again. Possibly for the rest of my life.

  He’s sinfully sexy, his dark and quiet personality just adding to the intrigue. He was ready to protect my baby with his life. He was ready to throw his date out on her ass because he thought she – I – was a threat. Then he caught my daughters vomit, didn’t make the ‘ick’ noise, then he bathed her.

  Add in the ink and the bling and the sly grins and I was ready to let him chain me to his bed.

  Sexy Store guy was
already Sexy Store guy. Add that all in and… wow.

  “Well, penile free except Jim…” Tink adds and my eyes narrow. I’m not sure how I feel about that. Jim is Jim. He’s not Aiden, so that’s okay, but he’s still Jim.

  He may have a hole in his shoulder, but his sparkling wit and smartassery is bound to be just fine. Possibly even worse, since he’ll be bored and surrounded by girls.

  “Come on Tina, we need a girl’s night. Evie’s all better. No one’s dying anymore. We neeeed this,” she says, dragging the word out.

  It’s closing time anyway, it’s not a work night, and Evie isn’t sick anymore. Thank god.

  “Alright, we’ll come over. Want us to bring anything?”

  “Kit says nope, just yourselves.”

  ~*~

  “Finally!” Tink cries out the very second Evie and I walk through Kit and Bobby’s front door and we enter the living room.

  “Finally what? It’s been like, twelve minutes since I spoke to you,” I argue as Evie runs to Izzy and Bean and gives them big kisses and love.

  “Hey Tina.” Jim grunts, making to get up from his recliner chair but I walk to him, pushing him down by his uninjured shoulder and I kiss the top of his head instead.

  His smile flashes wicked, and I honestly don’t know if I’ve been played. It’s been barely more than two weeks since he was hurt; do super fit, world fighting fighters continue to grunt and carry on and whine two weeks later? Or are they better by that point?

  “Hey Jim. How are you feeling?”

  “I’m good. I’m fine,” he says quickly, hooking Izzy around the waist as she attempts to walk by him and he pulls her down to sit in his lap. “But enough about me. Tell us about your date?”

  My mouth drops open. Is he kidding? “Are you kidding?”

  “Not even a little.”

  “Did they take your balls while in surgery? You sound more gossipy than a girl.”

  “I’m okay with that,” he says as Kit and Tink sit down around us, expectation written all over their faces.

  I’ve been ambushed. They planned this.

  “So you had a date with Aiden Kincaid?” Tink squeaks and I literally put my hands over my heated cheeks.

  “Sexy Store guy is Aiden effing Kincaid,” Kit says, so excited all her teeth are showing and her already big eyes look huge.

  “Oh my god.” Groaning, I sit on the coffee table by Jim’s feet and hold my head in my hands. “Can we just ignore that whole night?”

  “Absolutely not,” Jim says, giddiness coating his voice and I shake my head. I mean, yay for him not being in the hospital and sad and sore anymore, but does it have to be at my expense?

  “I can’t believe the epic proportions of miscommunications,” he laughs. “I’m just… disgruntled,” he tests the word and then satisfied, he nods. “I’m disgruntled I missed it. I would have paid anything, literally anything to have been here the other night.”

  “Jim, it really wasn--”

  “Did you really nail him in the balls?”

  Oh my god. I close my eyes at the mortification. “Yes.”

  “Evie, did you really puke on Biggie?”

  “Evie was sick,” Evie says, sitting up from kneeling over Bean as Bean lies on a blanket on the floor.

  “Did you get it all over him?” Jim asks, smiling stupidly.

  “Evie made a mess.”

  “Atta girl, Uncle Jim is proud of you baby girl.” He laughs loudly, his whole frame shaking and he presses the hand on his good arm against the shoulder on his bad side.

  I hope he hurts himself.

  “Biggie has pretties,” Evie continues and I sit up straight, my eyes wide with panic. Holy shit. Evie hasn’t mentioned his pretties once since that night. I wasn’t even sure she noticed.

  “What’s that mean?” Kit asks and I groan.

  “In his boobies,” Evie informs her proudly and I groan louder.

  “What does she mean?” Tink asks and Jim guffaws louder, holding his shoulder harder as he coughs and laughs.

  “Aiden has bling in his boobies,” Jim hoots.

  “He does?” Kit and Tink both shout, but curiously, Izzy stays silent.

  “I’ve seen them,” she says dismissively. Kit and Tink fan themselves and Jim pulls Iz tighter against his chest.

  I watch as Jim leans in, whispering something quietly in her ear and when she blushes and bites her lip, I look away, feeling like an intruder to their private life.

  “Since when?” Kit whispers, fanning herself and Jim pulls his face away from Izzy’s ear.

  “Stop picturing my brother’s pretties,” Jim laughs, trying to sound offended but not getting there at all.

  “I’m just… it’s just… no way,” Kit finishes and a blush actually works its way onto her cheeks. “Aiden.”

  “Ah, Kitten--”

  “Anyway,” I interrupt him before this gets any worse. “Can we please change the subject?”

  “Sure,” Jim says easily. “So you meet my brother in Jonah’s store, you gab on about cereal,” he continues, ticking each event off on his fingers. “Then you disappear on him.”

  “Well--”

  “He told us about you,” he continues, shutting me right up.

  “He did?”

  “Yeah, he told us and said he wanted to ask you to the fight dinner.”

  “He did?”

  “Oh man,” Tink cries out. “We even talked to you about that day. We even spoke about who he would take, and you said--”

  “That’s enough of that conversation,” I cut her off before she tells loud-mouth Jim Kincaid what I said about the Sexy Store guy banging me brainless then leaving again.

  “Then he brought Anja,” Tink continues and everyone’s faces turn sour. Who the hell is Anja?

  “Which turned into a shit fight,” Kit adds.

  “Truth,” Jim agrees. “My homegirl was about to beat her ass for looking at me.”

  “At you?”

  “Yeah, she tried to jump brothers,” Tink explains.

  My eyes bug out of my head. “This chick came with Aiden but tried to leave with you?”

  “Mmhmm,” Izzy grumbles unimpressed, but Jimmy squeezes her against him.

  “She attended this thing with Aiden, but dumped him?” I just can’t even imagine. I mean, Jim and Bobby are cute, I won’t lie, but Aiden is… wow.

  “Yep, but Kit kicked her ass from one end of the room to the other. Ripped her extensions out and everything,” Jim says.

  “Well that’s an exaggeration,” Kit argues with a laugh. “I never touched her.

  “But you would have,” Jim continues. “If Bobby didn’t hold you back, you would have flattened her.”

  “I definitely would have. B. i. t. c. h. I was just looking out for you. And Iz.”

  “We know Kitten, and we love you for it.”

  “Alright, are we done?” I ask them, quite ready to get out of here before they--

  “So, you gonna go on another date with him?” Jim asks quickly. I swear I’m about ready to take a spoon and dig it into his shoulder.

  “Another date implies they went on a first one,” Tink says. “All they did was sit at the counter and eat bacon sandwiches.”

  “He cooked for you?” Jim asks with wide eyes. He sits up, pulling Izzy with him and she giggles.

  “It was just bacon and--”

  “But he cooked the bacon?”

  “Um yeah--”

  “He cooked the toast too,” Kit says triumphantly, as though she caught him cooking me a five star meal.

  “Holy poopy,” Jim says and despite the fact I know this whole conversation is moments away from exploding on me, I laugh at his censored sentence.

  He’s come a long way since last year.

  “My brother has a crush,” he says wondrously, miraculously, owlishly. My face burns hot; people our age don’t get crushes. And Aiden effing Kincaid doesn’t have a crush on me.

  “He doesn’t have a crush,” I argue, but
they all smile indulgently.

  “Oh my god,” Jim exclaims, far more excited than the girls. And the girls are excited. “Imagine if you guys got married. Then I’d have another sister to annoy. And a niece too. Oh my god, a niece!”

  “Can you stop?”

  “Absolutely not. This is epic--”

  “Nobody is getting married James, relax.”

  “Mmmhmm, we’ll see,” he brushes me off. “Aiden Kincaid doesn’t get crushes--”

  “Exactly!”

  “Nuh uh, lemme finish, baby doll.” I want to hit his patronizing ass. Again. It’s a common inclination when hanging around Jimmy. That bullet wound seems to have made him even more annoying. Like it unlocked a new level. “My brother doesn’t get crushes… usually. So this is big. This is epic.”

  “And Evie already calls Nelly Gramma,” Tink adds, because she’s a dick and has no qualms about throwing her friends under a bus. Jim coughs through his laughter. “It’s a totally smooth transition.”

  “Please stop.”

  “Alright, alright, alright. Leave her alone,” Kit intervenes, finally, and I wonder if she’s only just remembered now that she’s the least dickish of them all. She was enjoying my torment though, I’m sure of it. “Jimmy, can you make us something to eat?”

  Jim scoffs at her. “This princess ain’t your maid.”

  “Ha, funny bunny. Please? We’re starving,” she pouts, popping her bottom lip.

  Jim fights his smile, biting his tongue. “K, fine, whatever. A guy knows when he’s not welcome.”

  “That’s awesome. Not everyone knows when to take those hints,” Tink teases him and he jumps up, his agility proving his grunting and moaning earlier was bullshit. He shoots toward her, her squealing ringing loud as he grabs her and messes her hair.

  Izzy fell from his lap in his haste, slumping down onto the couch where he was only a second ago and she giggles, watching someone finally torment Tink the way she so enjoys tormenting the rest of us.

  “Get off me,” Tink shouts through her laughter. He lifts up, taking his weight off her, but shoves her over so she falls to the floor.

  “You’re a dick.”

  “Wanna see it?”

  “No!” we all shout, because he would probably totally whip it out.