The Silk Tree

by Julian Stockwin

  It was a modest but comfortable house, faintly reminiscent of the antique Euboean style with its mock porticoes and inner courtyard. Quiet, away from the lower streets, it seemed to fit the bill perfectly.

  ‘What do you think, Ying Mei?’ Nicander asked, puzzled that she had suddenly gone pale and withdrawn.

  ‘Yes. It will do,’ she said woodenly, then enquired, ‘What are you asking for the rooms?’

  Mrs Malech named a value in Sogdian soms which Nicander’s quick merchant’s brain quickly converted to a usable reference, but before he could speak Tai Yi snapped in Greek, ‘That’s too expensive!’

  Nicander wheeled around in astonishment.

  ‘Who do you think I was practising with?’ Ying Mei said with a small smile.

  He shook his head in admiration as an arrangement was satisfactorily concluded.

  ‘Then you’ll need your gear to settle in. We’ll have it sent to you from the caravanserai. Is there anything else …?’ The lump in his throat had returned.

  Ying Mei turned and looked at him for a long moment. ‘You promise you’ll come back and say a proper goodbye before you leave?’ she whispered.

  Nicander nodded slowly, unable to speak.

  Marius chuckled. ‘O’ course we will! There’s the little matter of settling up for the rest of our trip, we haven’t forgotten. Come on, Nico, we’ve a lot to do.’

  ‘Well, how did you get on?’ Nicander asked Marius.

  ‘There’s a caravan, sure enough, but the master needs clearance from his agent before he’ll put us on the books. How about you?’

  ‘Good and bad.’

  ‘Tell me.’

  ‘I know more about where we are now.’

  ‘Oh?’

  ‘Marcanda of Transoxiana.’

  ‘What?’

  ‘This is what Alexander the Great called this place when he conquered it. And it’s why they still have Greek here. You wouldn’t believe it but he put in another week’s march from here towards Osh but when his generals saw the mountains we came down they mutinied and wouldn’t go on any further.’

  In a way Nicander felt a kinship with these ancestors of his and a comforting realisation that at last they were on known territory. On this very ground Greeks and Macedonians had set their boots and in a line that stretched back to Greece itself, a saga of conquest that was unmatched in history.

  ‘You also said bad,’ Marius prompted.

  ‘Yes. The way home is due west in a straight line. Just a small obstacle we have to face.’

  ‘What?’

  ‘We’re the wrong side of Persia, it’s in the way and we have to get through it – Justinian’s greatest enemy and we don’t quite look like harmless Sogdians.’

  Marius was not going to be put off. ‘Well, let’s see what happens with the caravan. We may have to go in disguise or something. We’ll work it out – after coming all this bloody way there’s nothing going to stop me now!’

  Nicander tried to be enthusiastic for his friend’s sake.

  It was tedious, having to remain at the caravanserai for word, not being able to get out to see sights that might take his mind off things, or visit a wine house to drown his sorrows. Hanging over everything was the crushing thought of having to see Ying Mei one last time.

  Nicander pulled himself together. It had to be done. Then he would try to get on with what was left of life.

  ‘Marius. I think I’ll say my farewells to the ladies now. No sense in waiting to the last minute. Will you come?’

  ‘I don’t think so. I’m not much for goodbyes, and some bastard has to stay around here. You go, tell ’em I wish ’em well, that sort o’ thing, you know. Oh, and don’t forget the settling up!’

  CHAPTER FIFTY-NINE

  Ahead was her lodgings: in a way so sweet-sad in its Hellenism of another age, and from now on where she would have her being. How could he just go in and end it all?

  Nicander shied away as if he’d come to the wrong address. But this was just delaying things. He turned back, determined to see it through; he would make it short and final, be strong and resolute – it was the only way.

  His hand hovered at the door then he knocked firmly.

  Ying Mei opened it uncertainly, pallid and tense. Her face lit up on seeing him. ‘Ah Yung! You came!’

  ‘Why, yes,’ Nicander answered, taking in the image of her standing there; he would remember her beauty for as long as he lived.

  ‘I promised … to say goodbye before we left.’

  ‘Please come in!’ she said happily.

  The room had been transformed: there was now an elegant throw over the long couch, a deep-pile rug in green and gold on the wooden floor. And after her desert travails: flowers everywhere.

  ‘Would you like some wine? Here it is all made from grapes, I find.’

  ‘That is kind of you.’

  He sat diffidently at one end of the couch.

  ‘Tai Yi is not here at the moment,’ she called from a side room. ‘She went out with Mrs Malech who’s showing her all the local shops and bazaars. I … I couldn’t really face it myself but they said they’ll be back for supper.’

  He stood up. ‘There’s nobody else here? I should really leave.’

  There was a sudden clatter. She hurried in. ‘Please – please don’t go!’ she blurted, her face strained and the glint of a tear visible. Nicander steeled himself – she was taking the reality of her exile harder than she was admitting to the world and it was all he could do to prevent himself going to comfort her.

  ‘I – of course.’

  ‘I’m such a silly, it’s just that …’

  ‘Ying Mei, you don’t need to explain. I understand.’

  His heart began to weep for her – and what could not be.

  ‘Yes, I know you do. We always did get along well, didn’t we?’

  He struggled to answer. ‘You were a good pupil.’

  She came and sat on the opposite end of the couch. ‘And you! Do you remember how quickly you understood how Hsün Tzu and Confucius could be enemies, yet friends at the same time? I was amazed at you!’

  ‘It must be that my teacher was a very wise and patient … being,’ he said, unable to keep the feeling from his voice.

  She looked at him, her expression unreadable, her hands working together.

  In the silence the emotion in his breast swelled.

  ‘Ying Mei – I can’t help it. I have to tell you this or die!’ he cried out suddenly. ‘I … I love you so much! I can’t bear for you to be taken from me, God help me!’

  She froze at the words but he didn’t care. In a few minutes it would all be over anyway and if it was the last thing he did on earth he wanted her to know how deeply, passionately and hopelessly he felt about her.

  ‘I … I’m sorry, but this is how I am. I’ve tried but I just can’t stop it! My love – it keeps getting stronger and I c-can’t help it!’

  Tears came and he gazed at her in dumb misery.

  She still sat rigid; then, very deliberately, moved over and knelt down in front of him.

  ‘Ni K’an Ta. I … I didn’t know!’ she said with an infinite tenderness. ‘You should have told me.’

  She took his hands, raised them to her lips and kissed them gently, looking into his eyes with a compassion that was unbearable. ‘For I would tell you … that I care for you too,’ she whispered. ‘I have for a long while but I mustn’t show it. You see, I have to say it: I … I love you too.’

  A storm of feeling broke and he tore himself free and stood, his chest heaving. If he didn’t run – flee from the room instantly – he would be overcome.

  But before he could move, she was clinging to him, her face buried in his shoulder, weeping brokenly.

  His arms went around her in an instinctive comforting but he felt her body pressing into his.

  With a roaring in his ears he held her closer.

  The warm, soft form yielded to him and they slowly slipped to the floor in each other�
��s arms.

  Images intermingled: robes in disarray, a flash of nakedness, a shoulder, a young breast.

  Ying Mei looked up at him, her face impossibly beautiful, dear and precious.

  He kissed her again and she responded passionately. Her body under him came alive, awakening and arousing his own in a sweet agony.

  Finally, in an uncontrollable ecstasy, they came together in a hard, thrusting convulsion, leaving them both spent.

  They clutched each other for a long time as if desperate to hold on to the moment; wild-eyed, ecstatic – fearful of the storm that had passed.

  Nicander gathered his robe about him and rose to the couch, fighting back tears at the sight of her naked form, still shuddering with passing spasms.

  She collected her scattered garments and joined him, both lost in a haze of unbelief and joy.

  Her hand crept into his. ‘I-I’m sorry,’ she said in a small voice. ‘I’m truly sorry. It … it just happened, I couldn’t stop myself.’ Her head fell.

  ‘Ying Mei, don’t say that!’ he stammered. ‘I love you! So much, so very much – this happened because we love each other, we need each other!’

  ‘I have disgraced you. You will hate me for seducing you like a common whore.’

  Hardly believing his ears he seized her hands and forced her to look up. ‘What are you saying? I don’t understand.’

  She looked up at him tearfully. ‘You will never forgive me, for I’ve done something that is wicked, yet I ask you to—’

  He stared at her in amazement. ‘You’re saying things that don’t make sense. Please tell me!’

  ‘Your calling is now affronted. As a holy man you have your standards and—’

  ‘A holy man!’ he gasped. ‘Is this …’

  ‘Since that time in the desert you pulled me out of the sand, I’ve looked up to you, admired you – and then loved you as I knew I must not. Now I’ve dishonoured you, shamed you and I bitterly regret it.’ Her eyes filled, imploring his understanding.

  At first he couldn’t answer, struck dumb with what he was hearing. Then he tenderly lifted her chin and looking deeply into her eyes said simply, ‘My love, I never was a holy man.’

  ‘You … you’re saying this to comfort me.’

  ‘No, it’s true. I couldn’t admit I was not a holy man or you wouldn’t trust me. And then it went on for so long, if I admitted it you’d despise me for an impostor.’

  ‘Then you’re really not …’

  ‘No.’

  She flung her arms around him and wept in release.

  ‘My very, very dearest, it should be me who should beg forgiveness. You are a noble lady and … and have a future … and I …’

  Touching his lips she murmured, ‘When we’re married …’

  ‘Married?’ he stuttered, overcome.

  ‘When two people love each other, it’s the usual thing, I believe.’

  In a whirl of emotion he blurted, ‘My darling! I … I …’

  ‘Dear Ni K’an Ta, we’ve always been meant to be together! And now we shall!’

  ‘I … I …’

  ‘And you’re not Ah Yung any more. I’m going to call you the same as Ah Wu does – Ni K’ou. It’s a fine ancient name, and one for the man of my heart.’

  He swallowed, hardly able to speak. ‘And you, my very dearest, I shall call you … Callista, the most beautiful.’

  She looked long and deeply into his eyes. ‘We will live and love together, you and I, for always and always, to the end of time.’

  In a delirium of feeling he pulled her to him, crushing her with tenderness.

  ‘But what now?’ she whispered.

  ‘Well …’

  ‘We’ll live here in Samarkand, but … but I really don’t know that much about you, Ni K’ou. If you’re not a holy man then …?’

  ‘It was only a means to protect us while we went on our mission.’

  ‘For the king! How wonderful – do tell me about it!’

  ‘Later, Callista. Shouldn’t we …?’

  ‘Oh, yes. They might be back early.’

  She gave him a kiss then left the room, calling back, ‘I won’t be long. Don’t go away, Ni K’ou!’

  When she returned, sparkling and radiant, he had restored his outward composure but inside he was nearly overwhelmed in an unstoppable tide of happiness.

  She came and sat by his side. ‘When will we tell everybody, Ni K’ou?’ she said dreamily. ‘It will surprise them both, don’t you think?’

  ‘Ah. This could be a problem. Could you hold off telling Tai Yi until after I’ve spoken to Marius? He’s going to need careful handling.’

  CHAPTER SIXTY

  Nicander walked down the road to the caravanserai in a blissful haze. To have been granted by the gods the highest felicity in this life …

  But his mind suddenly slammed in to the present. If he was to live in Samarkand, what was he to do? They couldn’t live off her capital indefinitely. Would it be enough to start some kind of business?

  And there was the matter of the grand mission he and Marius had embarked on all those many months ago. Was it right to let his friend go on alone when he’d sworn to stand by him? He would have no regrets about letting Marius keep the secret of silk for himself, but he had to make it to Justinian first. And while the proud legionary had his strengths, this arguably needed both their talents.

  Did this mean he must see it through first then return to her? Would she wait for him? Was it fair to expect her to?

  But to leave her now was more than he could bear to think about.

  The thoughts raced through his head and as he came up to the caravanserai cell he made a decision. He owed it to his friend to tell him about Ying Mei right away; he’d work the other things out with him afterwards.

  He opened the door but before he could enter he was slammed to the floor.

  ‘What the …?’ he spluttered, staring up at Marius.

  ‘I thought it was … bugger that. Where’ve you been? You took your time saying goodbye!’

  ‘Well, I’ve—’

  ‘Save it. We’ve got big trouble.’ Marius went to the door, checked outside, then closed it quickly.

  ‘That clearance the caravan master had to get? The fucking Persians now know there’s someone here who’s come from China and heading through. There’s rumours of foreign devils talking to Sogdians, holy men who aren’t what they seem … Nico, they’re out looking for us. We’ve got to get away!’

  ‘You mean leave Samarkand?’

  ‘Of course I do! What’s wrong with you? This is bloody serious – we’ve got just hours before they find us.’

  ‘But if we can’t go by caravan then—’

  ‘For Christ’s sake! I’m saying now! Get out by any means as long as we’re gone from here!’

  ‘What about Ying Mei?’

  ‘Those two takes their chances, o’ course! Nico, there’s no time to argue, we’ve got to move.’

  ‘They have to come with us.’

  ‘Are you crazy? Whatever plan we come up with things’ll be rough, women’ll get in the way and we’ll be caught. No, they stay behind.’

  ‘Marius, we agreed to deliver them safely to the west. This is the west, but they’re not safe. I’m not leaving them here while they’re in danger.’

  ‘You’re not?’ Marius rapped.

  ‘No.’

  ‘So I go alone?’ he said with a steely edge of menace.

  ‘And break your word to Kuo?’

  Marius flinched then gave a twisted smile. ‘You bastard. All right, they come. But let’s get out of here fast. We’ll hide with them while we come up with something – anything!’

  Ying Mei opened the door. ‘Ah Wu! How nice to see you!’

  After a quick look up and down the road, Marius pushed past her. Bewildered, she flashed a glance at Nicander who put a finger to his lips.

  Wheeling about in the centre of the room, Marius demanded, ‘Where’s Tai Yi?’

&n
bsp; ‘I’m here!’ she said frostily, suddenly appearing.

  Nicander caught Ying Mei’s eye and she gently shook her head. She’d kept her secret.

  ‘Tell ’em,’ Marius grunted, going out to check the back of the house.

  It took little time to explain the situation and as soon as Marius returned it was agreed that they had to move fast. Their options were pitifully few. Any caravan would be watched, including the ones returning to Osh, so even falling back to where they had come from was not possible.

  ‘Creep out into the country and hide?’ hazarded Ying Mei.

  ‘We’ve got to look at the bigger picture, not just the short term,’ Nicander replied.

  ‘He’s saying we’ve got to get out o’ where the Persians are, to somewhere they’re not!’ Marius said flatly.

  ‘Like …?’

  ‘Let’s face it, Nico. We’re going back to Constantinople, whatever it takes. We’ve got to get around the Persians and I don’t know how. And that’s saying if the women are coming with us, they’re going there too.’

  Nicander glanced at Ying Mei. Samarkand was to have been where the two of them were to have lived, and where she could listen for news of China. There were no such lines of communication out of Constantinople and she would therefore never know …

  ‘We go,’ Tai Yi said, surprising the others with the force in her voice. ‘These Persians know we were with the foreigners when they came. So, My Lady, we have to decide if we trust these two to get us somewhere where we will be safe. I do.’

  Ying Mei bit her lip and avoided Nicander’s eye.

  Knowing nothing of the country, the larger world, even the city outside, where would they begin to plan? It seemed hopeless.

  Then she brightened. ‘Why don’t we ask Yulduz, you know, the caravan master we had? He’s sure to know if there are other ways.’

  ‘Damn it – she’s right!’ Marius agreed. ‘I’ll wait until dark to go and find him. Nothing we can do until then.’

  Marius came back with disastrous news. ‘This is bad – no, it’s fucking terrible! I gets to him and asks him, nice and friendly like, to help us. Then he turns white, says he doesn’t know us and in any case there’s no way he’s going to help any who are wanted by the kingdom. I don’t give a single obol for our chances now!’