Here With Me (Paloma's Edge)

by Shaw, Robin

  “You’re blaming Hunter, because he told them?”

  Scott sneered at me. “No. I am saying that you should just get with him, since he’s the person you want. You lied to me when I asked you if you had any feelings for him.”

  I rolled my eyes. “Maybe your memory is hazy, but you asked me if I was seeing Hunter. And I told you that I wasn’t. I did like you. I wasn’t the one trying to prove to my friends that I could bag you.”

  “You were just trying to prove to yourself that you don’t want to be with that—Hunter.”

  “You don’t know me well enough to come to conclusions like that, Scott.”

  “Are you trying to convince me, or yourself of that?” He blew out a breath. “I am just coming clean. You’re not being real with yourself. And I saw how your parents were when they saw Hunter. They didn’t approve of him on the spot. My parents wouldn’t want a Hunter near my sister, because he’s dangerous. I’d fight tooth and nail to stop some—a guy with those life long problems from dating my sister. I know you don’t wanna hear it, but if this is our last time talking, I have to say it; once an addict, always an addict. Whether they’re good people or bad people, it’s not just their body that wants alcohol and drugs.” He tapped his temples with his fingers. “It’s their every thought. They’re irritated, violent, or closed off because they’re not using, or want to use, or their high is coming down. Do you want to take a backseat to Hunter’s chemical dependency?”

  “What makes you an expert? Huh? How can you be so narrow-minded and not believe in one’s capacity to change?”

  “I didn’t say he couldn’t change. He could go on to other drugs or not change up his pattern of use. His whole life has to be about not going back to his old ways—if he hasn’t already—or spending his life chasing after his next high.”

  ***

  PETE WENT TO SLEEP after I read him five stories on Sunday evening. The drive home earlier this morning had helped me to clear my mind after Scott gave me more than his two cents on Hunter’s future. I’d felt sad for him and for myself. I’d wanted to refute everything Scott had said. I thought he believed what he’d said. In some way, Scott could possibly understand Hunter’s on-going struggle more than he’d been willing to confess. Hunter must have decided that he wouldn’t be coming into La Caridad anymore because on Friday Vince had picked up the orders. He’d introduced himself to Blanca and Jill and had asked how my ear piercing felt. Jill hadn’t commented on Vince being there, instead of Hunter, but I knew that she thought I’d had something to do with it. She wasn’t being weird to me, since I’d told her that Hunter and I had been physical. She was mature, like I’d known she’d be.

  I gave Pete one more kiss on his cheek and brushed the loose curls from his face. If he’d been remotely awake, he would’ve told me how disgusting it was. He didn’t like to be babied anymore by me, but he was my baby brother. Thinking about him always did the trick; sometimes I had to just see him in person and remember what was really important in my life. I’d decided that I was going to stay up into the wee hours of the morning and do my assignments, since there was a Halloween party on Wednesday. I had to have my costume by then. If I couldn’t find anything by then, I’d just go to the party with my apron from work.

  ***

  AS I CAME INTO the kitchen, the smell of great coffee tickled all of my senses. Dad was using this fancy new machine. When I peered at him, he gave me a wisp of a smile and I could see the sincerity in his eyes.

  “I remember when you were Pete’s age—like a little adult.” He nodded toward the table and I sat down while he brought over the mugs of Espresso. “You should’ve been asleep, but you insisted on having a cup of coffee with me before I went to work. Your mother blames me for getting you hooked on the stuff.”

  He sat down and I reached for the mug. “But you made me the decaf, so it didn’t make me stay up all night, like it would for Pete.” I shrugged. “What can I say?” I grinned at him. “I’d liked the smell.”

  Dad bobbed his head. “Is Pete asleep?”

  “Yes, Dad.”

  “How many stories did you read him?”

  “I read him the last three. I had him read the first two stories. He’s got the tone and expressions down.”

  “He’s getting more confident,” Dad said. “He’ll stumble a little over some words, but he reads the word or sentence until he says it properly.” He sipped from his mug, and I did the same, when he said, “Not that it wasn’t wonderful to see you today, but did you come home because you’re sad that Scott and you aren’t going out anymore?”

  “I was disappointed, but I am okay with it.” Dad’s held a doubtful expression. “Honest.”

  “We thought he was a nice boy for you.”

  I arched a brow at him. “And what made you think he was a nice boy?” I kept my tone playful. Dad had always told me that boys were after one thing only: sex. It wouldn’t surprise him if I’d told him that Scott had only wanted to get in my pants. However, steam would’ve came out of his ears if he knew about the bet on my virginity. I didn’t like that Dad knew about my V-card status, because some niggling part of my brain thought that he wouldn’t look at me like I was his little girl anymore when I shared myself with someone more than I had with Hunter Lovell.

  “He carried himself like I taught you a man should,” his countenance grew severe. “That Hunter boy looked like he’s been in juve and jail. Does he even go to your school?”

  I felt my pulse quicken and my skin tingle, as the contact of our lips replayed in my mind. I thought I could go one day without hearing about Hunter, but he’d crossed my mind numerous times today so it was just like hearing about him.

  “He’s a sophomore,” I kept my response short. Hunter hadn’t been in one of his classic vintage shirts, torn jeans, or leather jackets. He’d been dressed like a TA. And yet, Mom and Dad had assumed he couldn’t be a professional. He was a professional tattoo artist like Vince and the other men I’d seen at Lasting Impressions. They hadn’t postured; they were people who were skilled. Their work was on the walls and in the portfolios. I couldn’t explain any of these things to him, because, while I liked talking to him more than my Mom, he’d really think Beth was poisoning my mind, like Mom had said.

  “An education is never a waste. He might make something out of himself. But Beth is wasting her life on men like him.” He drank some more coffee. My mug had been empty for minutes. I didn’t bother to tell him, for the umpteenth time, that Hunter wasn’t her boyfriend. My parents hadn’t been surprised when I’d told them that Hunter was a friend of hers.

  Dad stood up and took our mugs. “One more Espresso for the road?”

  I faked a smile. “Yes, Dad.”

  ***

  THE HALLOWEEN SHOP BETH and I were in Monday night, after we’d worked was the size of a warehouse. If she hadn’t dragged me here, I wouldn’t have gotten a costume because I’d wanted to drink a glass of ice coffee and read more of my latest romance novel. There were accessories, costumes, masks, props, make-up, and novelty items I hadn’t seen here before. The sound of a witch echoed inside. Kids were running around and some were touching the mannequins, when the sales associates had asked not to a handful of times. This place made the main clothing store in Franklin Parks look like a small closet filled with some merchandise. There were so many pretty corsets and cat suits that I’d had a tough choice deciding which outfit I’d wanted, until I looked at my checkbook while Beth walked down the aisle and selected the most affordable one.

  Beth returned with a white baby doll dress and a blonde wig that had waves and curls in the ends; a Marilyn Monroe dress that actually resembled that famous dress she’d worn decades ago that had caused a frenzy.

  “Should I get it, or go for the royal blue and red fifties outfit I showed you when we came in?”

  “This is the one,” I insisted.

  Beth pursed her lips and the corners of her mouth quirked up. Naturally, she was a beautifully curvy girl.
She hadn’t tried diets or complained about her body. I believed that she wouldn’t change one thing about how she looked—flaws and all. She didn’t fuss over some of the stretch marks or cellulite she had. I used to wish that I’d have curves like her, but puberty proved to be fail me in that area. I was rail thin, unlike women from either side of my family. I had my mother’s dark eyes, dark hair, and some of her facial features, but I stood out like a sore thumb in Franklin Parks.

  She flicked her eyes over to my cat suit and I gave it to her so she could inspect it. Fanning herself, she said, “Now this is what I was talkin’ about! I don’t think you’ve worn pants since we were in the playground in kindergarten. And this is exactly how you should step your of your dress habit for the party Wednesday night. Scott will regret playing with your heart.”

  Beth handed the suit back to me and I looked at it again. I couldn’t wait to wear it and make believe I was another person for a night: adventurous, carefree, and bold. “He didn’t play with my heart. We wanted different things.”

  “Maybe so.” She turned her head around and scanned the room. “We have to get shoes and some funky make-up. What costume should I get Brianna? She wouldn’t want anything tight, like your cat suit.”

  “I didn’t know Bri was coming. She does have school the next day, Beth.”

  “I am aware.” She shook her head. “Gavin will pick her up after the party. She needs to unload just like you do, okay?”

  I nodded and we went to the other aisles of the costume store to find that outfit that would make Bri comfortable with being silly, but also good about how she looked at the same time.

  ***

  WHEN BETH AND I returned to our dorm room, Jake was putting a cover on his mattress and he was in his t-shirt and pajama pants. We put down our shopping bags and inhaled the scent of seasoned food. We’d thought we smelled food being cooked when we were in the hallway. I assumed that someone may have been cooking or microwaving a TV dinner in the community kitchen. But we looked at our table and saw grilled chicken and tostones. Jake had even made Beth’s favorite drink, a morir soñado, and an ice coffee for me, which was next to my plate. Beth kissed him on his cheek and he wiped the side of his face on his shoulder like Pete did.

  “This is why I love you,” Beth said, knowing how much he hated to hear it.

  “That isn’t the only reason,” he said with a smirk and gestured for us to start eating. We took our plates and went to our beds.

  “And we were going to pick something up from the drive-thru, but Mariska said she’d make ramen noodles,” Beth said.

  “You won’t have to suffer through Mariska’s mushy ramen noodles until Friday or Saturday.”

  I punched him on the arm. “It’s either my mushy noodles or Beth’s crunchy noodles. Which one do you think is more edible?”

  Jake lifted a side of his face and gesticulated his arms toward our plates. “Clearly, what you’re eating is more edible. Looks like you bought up the whole store, Beth.”

  “I had to get some extra stuff. The football team did win, so Chase and I are going to celebrate this weekend.” Jake put his fingers in his ears and squeezed his eyes shut. With a small grin, she reached for her drink and changed the subject. “Is Jut using the room again?”

  He nodded. “All of them let Michelle and me have the room this weekend, so she was able to run down here when she was on duty and was paged by one of the girls here, or another R.A.”

  Beth sent me the “I-told-you-so” look. I’d assumed that Michelle wouldn’t give in to Jake, but most girls that Beth and I knew couldn’t resist our brother. She walked toward me to take my plate, but Jake reached for them.

  “Go get comfy and I’ll wash these plates in the kitchen sink,” he said and Beth glided the plates into his hands. “You staying here tonight, or are you going to Chase’s?”

  “I’ll be staying in with you guys.”

  He nodded. “You two have any room for dessert?”

  Beth and I looked at him as if he had to ask that question. I’d make room for whatever he made, just like I did for Bri’s desserts. I was with my best friends like old times and about to eat dessert. There wasn’t anything else I wanted in this moment.

  Chapter 15

  Mariska

  “ARE YOU HIDING FROM Hunter?” Jill asked me, after I’d gotten my giftwrapped box out of my tote in the employee room of La Caridad late Wednesday afternoon. The day seemed to be dragging on, and tonight couldn’t arrive soon enough. We were short today. Four of the other waiters called in sick today and this was the only moment I’d had to myself, before Jill came into the employee locker room.

  As I turned around, Jill’s gaze dropped to the present I had in my hands. I closed my locker and walked toward her. “I am giving this to his dog, Riley. I was going to have Vince give it to Hunter for me if he came in, like he had on Friday and Monday.”

  Her mouth twitched up one side and she held the door open for me as I walked out first. My breath caught when I lifted my eyes and connected with his unapologetic stare. It seemed like forever since I’d seen him. His hair now reached the back of his neck and strands fell forward, like they had before. The plain old light blue shirt he had on molded to his firm chest and bulging arms. His jeans were long slung, like they usually were, and he had on his scratched up combat boots. I just hated that he could look so unkempt and delicious.

  “A present for me?” Hunter asked, making his voice sound much lower than it really was.

  Blanca gave him his to go bags and he winked at her. “Why would I get you a present?” I felt angry that I hadn’t seen him in so many days, so the question came out a little brasher than I’d intended. Had he and Jill hooked up again since the last time he’d come in? Since she’d asked me if I’d be fine if she continued to see him? Was he showing me what I knew already: that he had plenty of women whom he could chose from? He didn’t have to be a dick about it.

  “And why wouldn’t you get me a present?” He asked, his volume too loud for my liking. “I practically made you breakfast in bed.” He made it sound completely wrong, but I heard Blanca, Jill, and the line cook gasp. With a more conceited expression than he’d had minutes ago, his hazel gaze turned dark. He had me in the one place that should be neutral territory. How would anyone ever look at me the same?

  “You might wanna close your mouth before it falls to the floor, muñequita.” He made it seem as if the suggestion was just innocent banter, but calling the term of endearment, like I was some fragile porcelain doll, grated on me beyond measure.

  I pushed the gift to his chest. “This is for Riley.”

  “What did you get my girl?”

  “Little bones she can eat whenever she wants a snack. There’s real chicken and cheese in it. Beth told me she likes to play with bones.”

  Hunter opened one of the bags of food and I put the gift inside. I pivoted around, wanting to get over this embarrassing moment, and then my body twirled back, his chest crushed down on mine. Warm and soft lips brushed against my mouth and I didn’t know if the startled moan came from him or me. He tasted heavenly. A wave of increasing desire surged through me, making my panties instantly wet. Settling his hands on my hips, his kissing leisured. My hands grabbed onto his biceps and I didn’t notice when I’d first put my hands on his arms, but they were flexed underneath my grip. Hunter tore his mouth away. Laughter and clapping welcomed me when I slid my gaze to Blanca and Jill. The customers weren’t only getting great food; they were receiving free entertainment.

  “She’ll love it,” Hunter said with his hands framing my face. “You can give it to her yourself. Come see Riley whenever you can.”

  I tried to regulate my breathing and felt my face heat. He looked completely fine, as if he was just having a conversation with me. “But how can I see Riley without having to see you?” I asked in the most hostile way I could muster. He was making my not thinking about him goal impossible.

  This was only feeble, because he ran his thu
mb over my bottom lip before his hand was on his side. “We’re a packaged deal, muñequita.” He faced Blanca and he took his bags from the counter, winking at her. A female customer held the door for him in appreciation as he left.

  Jill hooted a laugh when I replaced her at the cashier some minutes after Hunter’s departure. “And you said you didn’t hit that?” She grinned at me. “If we didn’t…I wouldn’t have believed that he was so stacked! So, you wanna ring his neck?” She elbowed me lightly. “Use all of that frustration when you guys have sex again.” My cheeks were on fire. She fixed me one final look and went to the worktop to serve orders.

  ***

  I WAS IN BETWEEN Beth and Bri when we walked into the Halloween party at Chase’s apartment. It was filled to capacity, but I could tell that it was spacious. Beth and Chase had invited Jake and I after they’d decorated the space, but school had started up, Beth had begun working again, and Blanca had hired me. Beth had definitely had most of the say in the decoration, because mostly all of the furniture, the walls, and every object was in some earthy tone. Most of the guys weren’t in costumes, but every female was. The music was pumping and Bri pulled me into the crowd. My eyes darted over to Chase, who looked at Beth like he was going to keep her in his room all night. I knew Beth would look like every guy’s fantasy in her Marilyn Monroe white dress and the blonde wig that actually made her look enigmatic. Chase smiled at us and then Beth excused herself. As they danced, they had a private conversation and I swung my gaze to Bri. She looked so great and confident in her short red, glittery Betty Boop. Beth had been debating whether or not to get it for her, but I’d known that, despite it being a little risqué, that she’d love it once she saw herself in it, and she did. She’d left the black blazer that came with the dress in her tote. Gavin had wanted her to wear this gigantic fleece sheet he had in his trunk, but she’d told him that she wasn’t covering herself up tonight.