by Jodie Larson
“No.” I cough and sputter, too afraid to open my eyes because they may stay that way due to the cloud of chemicals in the air. “This is not that kind of date. People don’t bring their sons on a date-date. This is us going to a sporting event and eating overpriced food while avoiding the general public.”
Jenny huffs. “You’re so lame. What’s the point of dating a rock star if you’re going to squander it? You should be going to five-star restaurants, getting moved to the front of the line due to his status, and having people wait on you hand and foot.”
I quirk a brow. “When have I ever been that shallow?”
She pauses. “Never, but still. He’s Paxton.”
“Exactly. The friendly stalker at the coffee shop who wore me down into going on a date with him, only to find out later that he’s a big deal.”
“It’s not like you’re dating Tom Cruise or someone like that. He doesn’t have the paparazzi documenting his every movement.”
“Tom Cruise?” I snort. “How about someone closer to my age.”
“Fine.” She smirks. “Liam Hemsworth.”
I fake a swoon. “That’d be okay.”
“But do you really wanna go where he’s been?” Jenny has a hard time keeping a straight face.
“True. I’ll stick with my quasi-famous, friendly, rock star not-stalker.”
She laughs as we walk out of the bathroom and into my bedroom. “I think you’re putting way too much thought into this. If you see him as a regular guy, then that’s what he is. He’s not looking for the spotlight. Hell, every time I see him, he’s almost too casually dressed. I almost had to kick him out once because I thought he was a bum.”
I slide my skinny jeans up my legs, making sure my shirt is only tucked in the front, and turn to face her. “He comes to Fresh Catch?”
Jenny nods. “A few times a week. Sometimes with Brecken, sometimes by himself. We talk for a bit, then he leaves. He’s a sweet guy.”
My heart melts slightly. Paxton not only has managed to charm me but also my sister and mother. It was quite the surprise the other day when she came home and found the three of us sleeping on the couch together. But Pax was ultra-polite, using all of his manners and even being a good sport in answering my mother’s nagging questions. He passed with flying colors and her seal of approval. I did, however, have to suffer through the talk of being cautious with boys staying over while Jayce is around. After that, she encouraged me to continue down this path. From what she’s heard about Pax, she’s very impressed.
“Can I be real for a second?”
Jenny sits on the corner of my bed. “Always.”
I sigh and sit next to her, my hands folded neatly in my lap. “He’s too sweet. I’m waiting for the other shoe to drop. Nothing like this happens to me. The last time I dated a good guy, he dropped me like a bad habit the minute he found out I was pregnant. What if he turns into another Craig?”
It’s been the fear that sits at the back of my brain, nagging me into believing this could never work. It’s not even his fame I’m afraid of. I believe him when he says he’ll protect us. No, I’m afraid of falling and getting hurt again. I can’t put everything into a relationship if I know he’s not going to be around. I did that with Craig and he ruined me. I don’t know if I can suffer a similar fate. My heart may not make it.
Jenny grabs my hands, halting my fidgeting. “Stop it. Right now. Or I swear upon everything holy, I will kick your ass so hard, you’ll feel my shoe in there every time you walk.” Her face turns serious. “He is not Craig. Please stop comparing the two.”
“It’s hard.”
She keeps my gaze. “You’re right. It’s hard to let go, but you have to see what you have is different. To be honest, I hated Craig. He always seemed pretentious, like he was too good for us. Personally, I’m glad he’s not in Jayce’s life, screwing it up.”
I swallow, knowing she’s right but still having a hard time digesting it. He’s the father of my son. A part of me will always be grateful he was in my life, but the reasonable side says we’re better off without him.
“Can I do this?”
She nods. “You can. Trust him to protect you but don’t live in fear, either. You know what’s best for you and Jayce. If something doesn’t feel right, tell him and he’ll adjust. I know it. That man would move heaven and earth for you.”
God, I hate it when she’s right. Not that I’ll let her know. I’ll never hear the end of it if I do.
“Okay. One day at a time. First, let’s get through a public outing with very little action.”
“Define action.” Jenny wiggles her brows, sending us both into a fit of laughter.
“Keep it up and I won’t allow you near my son again.”
And on cue, Jayce runs into my room, fully prepared with the new L.A. Kings shirt and hat my mom picked up the other day. “Is it time yet?”
I laugh and ruffle his hair. “Almost. Pax should be here any–”
Ding dong.
Man, he has uncanny timing.
“Pax!” Jayce sprints to the door, trying to beat the world record in short distance running.
Jenny holds out her hand to help me off the bed. “Come on. I expect full details when you get home.”
We round the corner and I nearly stopped dead in my tracks. There’s Pax, holding my son in his arms as he tells him all about his plans for the night and what food he’s going to eat.
Jesus, take me now.
He cannot be this sweet with my son. Yet there he stands, holding him like he’s his own, never once flinching at the assault of questions coming his way or the random sentences as Jayce’s mouth moves faster than his brain can handle.
“If you don’t seal the deal soon, I’m really gonna kick your ass,” Jenny hisses in my ear.
“Shut it.”
The minute Pax looks my way, the whole room goes silent. I don’t hear the clock ticking on the wall or the sound my feet make against the tile floor. When he smiles, my heart flutters and flips in my chest. This has to stop at some point. I can’t keep feeling this way every time I see him. Eventually, I’ll be able to look at him without my whole world stopping. Right?
I clear my throat and regain my footing as I walk over to the two of them. “Ready?”
Pax laughs, still holding Jayce. “All set. You ready, bud?”
An excited yell is all we need. Mom holds the door open as we walk outside.
“Have fun you three.” With a wink, she closes the door, much to Jenny’s dismay. I think she wanted to watch the show a bit more.
“Should we take my car?” It seems only logical since I already have the car seat in.
Pax looks to the curb. “Actually, I thought we might take something else.”
How did I not notice the black town car before? I try not to let my jaw hit the floor as we make our way over, thinking of any objection I can. Nothing comes to mind.
“But, Jayce needs…”
Imagine that. Pax really thought of everything. Not only are we going to ride in style, but there’s the exact car seat Jayce needs, strapped in the middle.
It’s too much. He’s too considerate, too thoughtful, too…perfect.
Pax stands by my door and helps me in. “I told you, I’ve got you,” he whispers in my ear as I crawl inside.
Yes, he does.
We barely notice the drive to the Staples Center, mainly because Jayce hasn’t stopped asking questions since we left the house.
“Where’d you get this car?”
“Can I have a hot dog when we get there?”
“How much does a hockey puck weigh?”
“Do they ever cut through the ice with their skates?”
Again, Saint Pax takes it in stride, answering what he can and consulting Google for the others. I try to shush him, but Pax tells me not to worry about it.
Cars line the streets, trying to get into the busy arena. People flood the sidewalks, all chattering away or looking down at their phones. T
he windows are tinted, so we can see them but they can’t see us.
We pull around to a lower entrance, designated with special security who checks our pass. After we get the all clear, we enter our own parking area, easily finding a spot.
“This is designated for VIPs only. More privacy, fewer people.”
Exactly what I was hoping for.
Once we get to our floor, I feel out of place. Business professionals and their spouses walk around in their thousand dollar outfits and suits. Very few people are dressed in Kings gear, like me and Jayce. I’m out of my league.
“Pax, this is too much.”
We turn into the San Manuel club, where we’re directed to our private seating area.
Holy shit.
About twenty luxury boxes total, each boasting their own tables and TV’s away from the general public with full views, giving you the feel of being part of the crowd.
Jayce instantly runs to the edge, looking down to the ice to watch the players warm up.
“Pax, this is beyond amazing.” I don’t know what else to say.
Giving my hand a squeeze, he leads me to one of the plush leather seats, pulling me directly into his side. “Anything for you.”
Don’t cry. Don’t cry. There are possible celebrities and God knows who else around. Don’t let them see you don’t belong here.
Somewhere around the third period, Jayce got his second wind. “Stand Up” by Steel Dragon pours through the speakers; a song I’m only familiar with because it’s played during every game I’ve watched so far. He’s having the time of his life. Between the chef’s table and free drinks, it’s more than I ever could have dreamed. Poor Jayce is going to expect this every time we go to a game, though. He’ll be sorely disappointed when we sit in the nosebleeds and have only hot dogs or nachos.
Honestly, I have no idea what’s going on in the actual game. I’ve been too busy enjoying the feel of Pax’s arm around my waist, letting his fingers run up and down my arm or thigh. He hasn’t stopped touching me since we got here. Even when we were eating, he kept a foot against mine.
“He’s really into the game,” Pax says with a chuckle.
Jayce hasn’t moved away from the edge, his head moving side to side to keep up with the action below.
I smile at Pax. “Ever since one of his friends told him about hockey, all he’s talked about was going to a game. I have a feeling, though, he’ll be disappointed when he doesn’t get this experience every time.”
“Says who?”
He can’t be serious. I wave my hand around. “I can’t afford this every time he wants to come here.”
“Don’t worry about it.” He says it like it’s a done deal.
“Pax, no. Don’t you dare.”
With a laugh, he grabs my hip and drags me closer into his side. “Everyone needs to be spoiled sometimes. I’m sure he has a birthday coming up.”
“October,” I say, cautiously, unsure of where he’s going with this.
“Perfect. Right at the beginning of the season. Now, I can’t guarantee it’ll always be here, but we can maybe find something in the club level the three of us would be happy with.”
A rush of feelings I thought I’d buried deep down come flooding to the surface. I never wanted to sleep with anyone else after Craig, too afraid to put myself back out there. What would happen if I ever got pregnant again? Not that I’d be careless, but things happen. Jayce wasn’t exactly planned. We took every precaution, yet my beautiful boy is here with the biggest smile on his face.
But I don’t know how to be a mom and have a relationship. This is new territory and a fine balancing act I’ve never attempted.
The horn sounds and the arena erupts with cheers. Huh, they must have won.
“Mama! Did you see that last goal?”
I turn away from Pax, not realizing I hadn’t stopped staring at him for the last few minutes. “I must have missed it, buddy.”
“It was so great. The one guy went this way, then the other went that way, he circled ‘round the net and boom!” He flails his little arms about as he describes in as much detail as I’d expect from him.
Everyone around us starts filing out of their seats. Guess that’s our cue.
I grab Jayce hand, who instantly grabs Pax’s with the other hand. The smile on Pax’s face could light up all of downtown L.A. You’d think he won the lottery instead of the world’s chattiest five-year-old.
More and more people flood into the hallways and I start to get nervous. I grip Jayce’s hand tighter, keeping a mindful eye on our surroundings.
“Relax,” Pax says, obviously reading the concern on my face. “We’re almost there.”
Out of the corner of my eye, I spy a girl around my age with her cell phone pointed our way. She leans over and whispers to her friend, who also gets her phone and points it at us. I move closer to Jayce, trying to shield him because I don’t know what they’re doing or if they’re really taking a picture of Pax.
He turns his head and sees the girls, instantly moving behind us. “Let’s go this way.” We follow the signs and somehow end up in the same tunnel we came through at the beginning of the game. Pax hands the attendant our ticket and radios a guy to let our driver know we’re ready.
“What do you think they’ll do with those pictures?”
Fear strikes my heart as I think about poor Jayce being in the public spotlight. Or worse, it’ll pull Craig out of the woodwork and want to spend time with him if I’m connected with a celebrity. He’d be low enough to do something like that. Status was always his thing. All about who you know rather than what you know.
Pax pulls me under his arm, hugging me tightly. “If they were taking our picture, it’ll probably be for bragging rights to their friends.”
“How can you be so sure?” I ask. “With social media nowadays, you can post something on Facebook and it’ll go viral in a matter of minutes.”
He leans down and kisses the top of my head. “I think you’re reading too much into this. I’m not that big of a celebrity. No one cares about the backup guys in the band. Even still, when we’re doing mundane things, it’s not newsworthy.”
The town car pulls up and the driver holds open the door for us. Jayce’s eyes are finally getting heavy as I buckle him into his seat. We head out of the garage and into traffic, which is clogged with cars.
The ride home is silent, only Jayce’s tiny snores filling the air. Too many thoughts run through my head. Pax is downplaying this too much. People are crazy and go nuts when they see any sort of celebrity. According to Jenny, they’re the hottest thing on the market right now, so everyone wants to know more about the Lightning Strikes.
Pax reaches over the back of the seat, grazing his fingers across my shoulder. The fears and worries that plague my head slowly disappear, but not far out of reach.
When we pull up to my house, I quickly unbuckle Jayce and attempt to pull him from the seat.
“Stop,” Pax says, grabbing my hands. “Let me.”
He leans over and lifts my sleeping boy into his arms. Jayce mutters something and lays his head on Pax’s shoulder, hugging his neck.
This man is going to kill me.
I open the front door and clear a path to Jayce’s room. Pax lays him on his bed while I take his shoes and pants off. He can sleep in his shirt tonight. Tucking him in tight, he grunts slightly but snuggles into his pillow, sound asleep.
After shutting his door, it’s time to figure out what to do with Pax. Logically, I should ask him to leave, but watching him with Jayce has my heart—and everything south of it—aching with a need I can’t deny anymore.
Without a word, I pull him into my bedroom and shut the door, the latch sounds much louder than it really is. I stand on my tiptoes and take off his hat, tossing it to the floor. Nerves wrack my stomach and body as I slowly peel the shirt over his head, exposing what I assumed was underneath. Hard, sculpted muscles underneath his taut, tan skin.
Pax continues look
ing down at me, fire evident in his eyes. He lets me take the lead; one more thing to add fuel to the flames.
“Touch me,” I whisper, running my hands up the length of his torso before wrapping my arms around his neck.
In an instant, his mouth is on mine, taking the control that I easily give up. He pulls the shirt over my head, breaking our kiss for mere seconds before pouncing again, delving deep with his tongue. God, I love how he knows exactly what I need.
We back up in the dark room until I feel the edge of the bed. Pax pushes me down gently, spreading me out on the mattress. Faint light pours through the window, illuminating my body. It takes all I have not to cover my stomach and the roadmap of stretch marks from my pregnancy. Pax leans over me, slowly undoing the button on my jeans. I help him along by lifting my hips and pushing the material off my legs.
Standing up, he unloops his belt and starts sliding his jeans off until they’re in a heap on the floor next to mine.
I lean up on my elbows to fully take him in. If he had been born in the sixteenth century, there’d be a marble statue of him in some museum. Utter perfection.
Unclasping my bra, I toss it aside. Pax’s appreciative smile eases my self-consciousness.
“Kylie, I’m trying to be good, but you’re making it hard.”
Getting to my knees, I lean up to kiss his waiting lips, taking back some of the control I’d given up before. With a free hand, I run it down his chest, over the ridges of his stomach until coming to the rather impressive bulge in his boxer briefs. He twitches in my hand as I gently massage him over the material.
“That’s the point.”
A low growl is my only warning before Pax places both hands on the sides of my face, tilting my head just right so he can deepen the kiss. Our tongues move in tandem as my heart races in my chest. The ache from before magnifies a million times, desperately crying out for release.
“I need to know you’re sure about this,” Pax says against my lips. “Right now, all I want to do is spend the entire night inside you, feeling you come apart again.” He kisses my lips. “And again.” Kiss. “And again.” This time, he parts my lips with his tongue and leaves me speechless.