The Sleeping Serpent: A woman's struggle to break an obsessive bond with her yoga master

by Luna Saint Claire

  Luna felt a pit in her stomach. She’d missed him and now he needed her. “I want to, Nico, but I’m so scared of you abandoning me again. I know you want to drop the subject. I would dedicate myself to you forever; actually, I already have. But I need to know that no matter what, you won’t leave me again.”

  “You’re crazy, Luna. I never left you. You are the one who left me. Many times.”

  Tears welled up in her eyes and she looked away, not wanting him to see. “Of course I’ll help you, Nico…you know that.”

  “Be there for me, Luna, and everything will turn out for us. I promise.”

  Leaving the bank, Nico and Élodie walked to a Moroccan Blue Bentley convertible, and Élodie got into the passenger seat. Luna wasn’t surprised. It appeared Nico hadn’t exaggerated at all. He did find the woman of his dreams.

  Maya cut the engine of her black Jeep Wrangler. The rain had stopped, but before heading into the studio, she rested her chin on the steering wheel. Watching the steam rise off the shimmering asphalt, she thought about how devastated she’d been when Nico told her about Élodie. Indelibly etched in her memory, she visualized the moment Nico had fiercely pulled her to him and held her close in an almost desperate embrace. Nuzzling his face into her neck, he had called her his jaguar princess, whispering her name as if he were reciting a mantra. The recollection was so vivid, she unconsciously reached up and rubbed her neck where his bristly jaw had burrowed, causing a pleasurable tenderness. In a low and throaty voice, he had explained he wasn’t ready for a relationship, but he didn’t want to lose her from his life. He implored her to trust him—that he was making things happen and to be patient. Enfolded in his arms, she had been almost certain she felt his hot tears on her skin.

  The familiar stomachache that accompanied feelings of betrayal came on strong. She’d been suppressing her wildly erratic feelings, afraid of pressuring him—afraid of losing him. Feeling nauseated, she took several slow, deep breaths, clutching her stomach, which was now doing somersaults.

  Maya had anticipated the text from Nico informing her Élodie had left for Paris that morning and to come directly to the studio after work. At first, when Nico would tell her to stay away, she felt demeaned and inferior, but she concealed her feelings. Instead she would spitefully leave a little trace of herself at the apartment, even if it was only a used tampon in the bathroom trashcan. It wasn’t much, but it was her meager expression of retaliation. But now Maya felt Élodie was just a younger and prettier version of Alexa, and had nicknamed her the ATM machine. Like Alexa, Élodie spent lavishly on gifts for Nico, picking up the tab for everything with what appeared to be an unlimited expense account.

  Maya paused for only a moment before she continued walking into the studio. Nico was yelling at someone, and she quickly assessed he was on the phone, then heard him say Alexa’s name. Maya had been wondering how long it would take for Alexa to blow up about Élodie. Seeing Maya, Nico put his index finger to his lips, warning her to be quiet. She could clearly hear Alexa’s booming voice screaming at him through the phone to fuck off, threatening to no longer help him secure an investor for the center in Tulum. But Nico, unruffled, easily turned the tables on her. Venomously yelling how she damaged his business with her jealous and possessive behavior, he demanded she close the deal or she would be sorry.

  Maya took a deep breath and walked into the kitchen to start dinner, while Nico paced back and forth like a caged lion. Still harping, he switched his tactic and began sweet-talking her, saying Élodie was an important client and bringing in a huge investment from the Middle East, and that if Alexa wanted to be a part of him, she needed to make things happen.

  When he hung up, Maya mumbled, “Nico, is it wise to yell at her, since she’s the one who got you the gig in Abu Dhabi?”

  Nico erupted, “Shut the fuck up, Maya. You’re an idiot. Mind your business, I know what I’m doing!”

  Maya put her head down and quietly finished cooking him dinner. Later, they watched a movie on the big flat screen Alexa had bought him for Christmas.

  After dinner, Nico went into the bedroom and called Élodie while Maya cleaned up the dishes. When she finished, she sat quietly at the kitchen counter, eavesdropping. She had no trouble overhearing Nico’s side of the conversation. Weeks had gone by since Élodie had promised to pitch Nico’s deal, but apparently she hadn’t done it yet. Maya had read the new inflated business plan, which was now for a global chain of exclusive spa hotels and healing centers in Abu Dhabi, London, Paris, and the French Riviera.

  “It’s not that difficult. I gave you the proposal. Besides he knows me, and it shouldn’t be a hard sell. I’m a world renowned shaman and yoga guru.”

  Élodie must have balked, because Nico responded sharply, “Listen to me. If I go to him myself, it will look like I’m begging. It will diminish the value of the investment. We‘re doing him a favor. Offering him a great opportunity to be part of this business. Don’t you see the difference?” He paused.

  She must have contradicted him. “No, Élodie. If you recommend this investment, it carries more weight. He looks to you for investment advice. You tell him you’re letting him in on the ground floor…that it’s a special deal.”

  Nico paused, then she saw him pacing back and forth again before he continued in a softer sexy tone, “Baby…of course. You know how much I love you. This is an opportunity that we can’t let slip through our fingers. He has the money and he trusts you! Baby, I want us to be together, and I can’t keep working the way I am. It’s important I get this deal. If you love me and believe in me, then you need to do this.”

  He paced back and forth, tugging at his hair, obviously listening intently to what she was saying. Then he continued assuringly, “Of course…I’ll come there and meet him after you’ve made the pitch and he says he’s interested. Otherwise, it’s no good, it’s like I’m crawling…and the deal is worthless to him. He has to be jumping at this opportunity. Don’t you understand that?”

  More hair pulling. More pacing. “You promise? OK.” His voice got low and husky, “I love you, too…but don’t fuck this up. Yes…of course. I love you. Bye.”

  Storming out of the room, he barked, “She’d better do as I say, or I will destroy her.” His tone, angry and desperate, made Maya cringe. Raking his hair with both hands, his eyes defeated, he stormed, “She’s lying…I can tell. She has no intention of getting me that money!”

  Maya poured him a cup of chamomile tea to soothe his abraded nerves and reassured him that if Deepak Chopra and Dr. Oz could be big celebrities, Nico Romero surely could, too.

  27

  With her head resting on Nico’s shoulder, Élodie sounded convincing. “I promised Nico I will return in a few days. I am going to do what he asks of me and speak to my client about investment.”

  Listening intently, Luna sat across the booth from them at Stout Burger and nodded her approval. Élodie hadn’t touched her burger, and Nico was eating the remaining french fries off her plate.

  Nico rolled his eyes so that only Luna could see. He had been asking Élodie to do this for months, and she always made an excuse. Nico didn’t believe Élodie had even tried to present the sheikh with the investment, claiming she only cared about her own business, not his.

  Nico warned, “Élodie, if you don’t ask him this time, don’t bother to come back to me. I won’t see you.”

  Élodie snuggled deeper into his chest and tipped her head up to kiss him on the jaw line. “I love you, and I am going to get this dream for you—for us to be together, always.” Then, looking at her gold Rolex, she said she’d miss her plane unless she left for the airport right away. Nico got up so she could slide out of the booth, and Luna stood to embrace Élodie who, even without her Christian Louboutin high-heeled pumps, stood a couple of inches taller than Luna. Dressed eclectically in Saint Laurent black skinny pants, a white T-shirt with a graphic of the Eiffel Tower, and black fox vest, Élodie was strikingly chic in her effortless understated style.r />
  Luna wasn’t sure she believed Élodie would try to get the investment for Nico, either. Though she could tell Élodie was infatuated with him, she sensed her reluctance to insinuate her lover’s business aspirations with her role as an investment advisor.

  Luna hung back while Nico kissed Élodie good-bye. Her driver, a tall imposing sandy-haired man who looked like a Viking bodyguard, helped with her bag and then opened the rear door of the black Escalade. Luna wondered why he glanced over at her more than once, first removing his black baseball cap, then putting it back on as if he were trying to tell her something. When the car edged into the traffic, Nico looked back over his shoulder to make sure Luna was still there.

  Taking her arm, they walked toward his studio on Ventura while Nico vented. “Just watch, Luna. Mark my words. She’s doing it again, toying with me. She won’t ask for the money, and she won’t be back in a few days, either. She promised she would stay…and move in with me. I need her with me, but she just comes and goes as she pleases.”

  Luna tried comforting words. “Nico, you aren’t being fair. She has a business…and she’s here as much as she can be. As for the investment, maybe she just needs to find the right moment.”

  Luna knew her words were hollow, and was thankful when Nico abruptly changed the topic. “Luna, come to the house with me tomorrow morning. We can spend a long weekend. It’s already June, and I need to work on the vegetable garden and fix things around the house. We can spend time together, and we’ll cook on the fire pit.”

  His invitation was compelling. “Sure, I’d love to go,” she said without much hesitation.

  When Nico had bought the five-acre cabin in April, Luna mentioned she had a lot of stuff in storage from when they had a house in Lake Tahoe. After checking with Tyler, she told Nico he could take whatever he needed. There were extra sets of dishes, pots and pans, and odd pieces of furniture. Luna had kept most of the sentimental things, but there wasn’t room in the condo for everything. Nico rented a truck, and Élodie and Luna unloaded furniture and cartons of thrift shop treasures that Luna hadn’t seen in years.

  Élodie couldn’t believe all the things Luna had given him, and with each item she unpacked, she’d ask, “You are not keeping this?”

  Luna shook her head. “No. We don’t have room for all this stuff, and Nico has nothing. This will give him a home with personal things.”

  Élodie had smiled wistfully. “You give him so much—so much love.”

  Many of the picture frames still held photos of Luna that Élodie had begun removing when Nico interceded, “No. I like them.” Then pausing, he looked over at Luna. “Is it OK? Can I keep them?”

  When she had nodded her consent, he began arranging them on a bookshelf.

  Luna was packing a few things in her overnight bag when Tyler walked into the bedroom. Looking up, she said pointedly, “Nico asked me to invite you to come, too. He’s really trying, and he wants you to like him…” Then she added nostalgically, “Ty, it reminds me of our old cabin. When I see all our things, I feel like I’m there again. It will be fun, and it’s relaxing to get out in the country.”

  “I’ll come another time,” Tyler answered dishearteningly. Since Nico had gotten the house, Luna had unwittingly become his frequent companion when Élodie wasn’t in town.

  “He hates to be alone, Ty. When she’s not there, he’s anxious and doesn’t even want Maya around.”

  “You can go if you want to, Luna. But set boundaries. I don’t want all that nonsense to start again. You can be a friend, but not an object he uses. And remember, I’m your husband, not Nico. As long as he treats you with respect, I’m OK.”

  Luna refused to make the two hour trip on Nico’s Ducati. He’d had the house for a few months, but still couldn’t decide between a pickup, an SUV, or a sports car for driving there. He missed Sofia’s Porsche, and now seemed to bask in the luxury of Élodie’s Bentley.

  They piled into her green Land Rover and stopped first to get gas. It bugged her that he never offered to pay, but she didn’t say anything. As they approached Dick’s Sporting Goods in Pasadena, Nico squealed like a little kid for her to pull in. He had the catalog that had come in the mail, and they were having a sale. Walking into Dick’s, Luna asked what he needed, but Nico didn’t answer, instead heading straight to the gun counter.

  Luna had never held a gun, and was reluctant at first, voicing her objection, “Nico, why do you need a gun? You don’t need a gun! They’re dangerous.”

  Surprising Luna with his knowledge, he asked to see several rifles by name and bullet caliber. As he deftly sited one rifle, checking the chamber, he scoffed at her. “Luna, everyone needs a gun out in the country. There are Mojave rattlesnakes out there. They’re deadly! Plus, the deer are eating my garden.”

  After three hours of discussion about rifles, Luna’s head was spinning. She soon became fascinated enough to ask to see a break-action shotgun. “Can I look at that Annie Oakley gun? I think it would be fun to learn skeet shooting!” The salesman passed her the shotgun as she said, “I love those English movies where they go on picnics and shoot clay pigeons.” Playfully, she mimed, “Pull!” and pretended to shoot the pigeon.

  Even though he was slightly embarrassed by her antics, Nico couldn’t help laughing. “Enough, Annie Oakley!”

  Just as she was about to faint from hunger, Nico finally settled on a Tikka T3, made in Finland. Luna conceded that in stainless steel, it was very pretty. She was relieved he had finally come to a decision, until she realized he was embarking on another hour-long conversation about bullets—learning that a 130 grain by Hornady was both economical and effective against an innocent deer.

  Starving, they stopped at McDonalds before getting on the Corona Freeway to Temecula. Luna mused that no one she knew would believe she had spent more than four hours gun shopping.

  Settling into the cabin, Luna unpacked the groceries and started browning sausages and cutting onions and garlic. Nico was busy with his new rifle, and now, eager to try it out, turned off the stove and literally pulled her out the door. As he darted up the hill, she raced after him. He set a few large, plastic milk jugs into the crooks of trees, then counting paces, lay down on the ground about 200 yards away and summarily picked them off, one by one, impressing Luna with his marksmanship. Walking back to the house, she asked him when and where he learned to do that. He just smiled without answering.

  Luna pulled placemats and napkins from the painted sideboard, and set the oak dining table with the familiar old set of blue and white china. If she squinted her eyes, she might have thought she was back in her lake house.

  Just as Luna was testing the rigatoni, Nico walked in carrying an arm full of wood for the fireplace. Gently warning her not to overcook the pasta, he popped one in his mouth, then quickly drained the whole pot into the colander before dumping the pasta into the deep cast iron dutch oven that held the sausages and wilted kale. After pouring wine into two crystal wine glasses, he carried the heavy pot over to the table and lit the taper candles in pewter candlesticks. In the dim light, the rest of the house fell into shadow, and Luna’s vision contained only Nico, sitting across from her.

  With Nico, Luna always felt transported to a different place and time, especially now, amid all her former possessions. After dinner, Nico lit a fire and they settled in two adjacent arm chairs. Luna had a novel she’d brought with her, and Nico pulled out a book on rustic cabins that Luna had stored along with books on gardening. They propped their four sock-covered feet on a painted milk stool in front of the fireplace, and their wine glasses sat on the tripod table between them.

  The only light was the glow from the fireplace, and she glanced over at him, seeing his hair falling over his face as he turned the pages. Comfortable with the silence, Luna thought how peaceful Nico was in this house. She never saw him sit so quietly with a book. As if he read her thoughts, he said, “I like this, Luna. Just sitting and reading with you.” He affectionately stroked her foot with
his in an intimate gesture.

  Luna was glad Nico woke up early, because she could never figure out the coffeemaker. If she attempted it, as she did once before, Nico scolded her. But he’d quickly apologized, repeating the instructions yet again. Nico emerged from his bedroom on the opposite side of the house from the guest room, wearing sweatpants and a torn T-shirt, making a beeline for the coffee machine. “You didn’t make coffee, did you?”

  Luna chuckled. “No way. Do you want eggs?”

  She cracked six eggs into a mixing bowl and melted some butter in the pan. It was a glorious morning out there, away from the smog of L.A., and she carried two plates of eggs and toast outside into the sunshine along with her mug of coffee. While they ate breakfast, Nico made a verbal list of all the gardening tasks that needed to be done. When they finished their eggs, he and Luna, each with a refill of coffee, walked to the fenced-in vegetable garden to check on the progress of the plants. Nico began weeding, telling Luna to pull the weeds, not the plants.

  They were mending fences when his cell phone rang. It was Élodie calling from Paris. “Why are you in Paris?” he snapped. Luna didn’t hear her reply.

  When Nico instructed Luna, “Hold this together while I attach them,” she heard Élodie ask with whom he was speaking.

  Nico baited her. “What difference does it make?”

  Luna felt badly he was being cruel to her and called out, “It’s Luna…”

  She heard Élodie say hello before Nico abruptly got up and walked away to speak privately.

  When he hung up, he wasn’t angry at Luna, just frustrated with Élodie. “I miss her, Luna. I really love this woman…I’ve made love to her all over the house and on the grass, looking up at the stars.”

  Luna commented, “She’s so beautiful, Nico, It’s no wonder you love her.”