On Thin Ice (A Dallas Demons Hockey Romance)

by Aven Ellis

  I’m sexy, I think in complete astonishment. My transformation is nothing short of amazing.

  No. Completely amazing would be the ability to get my contacts in without losing one, which I failed to do before Reese did my makeup. I couldn’t find it. Reese couldn’t find it. So I had to take another one out. Now I have an odd number of contacts left, but I don’t care. I’m not in glasses. Hurrah!

  I reach for my Givenchy perfume, the one that Matt loves, and spritz it on each wrist and at the base of my neck. I set the bottle down on the marble countertop and smile.

  I’m a woman who is going to have the perfect New Year’s Eve.

  With the man I love.

  Ding-dong!

  Oh! Matt’s here. Excitement fills me. I can’t wait for him to see me in this outfit. I grab my phone and drop it into my clutch. My coat is already on top of my overnight bag, ready to go.

  I head down the hall to the entryway, and butterflies swirl with each step. I reach the door, turn the lock, and open it for Matt.

  And while I’m excited to surprise him, he surprises me.

  Because he’s standing before me in a gorgeous double-breasted black tux, a crisp white dress shirt, bow tie, and patent leather shoes. His golden blond locks are slicked back with a bit of gel, giving him the air of someone about to walk a red carpet.

  I have no words.

  He’s absolutely gorgeous tonight.

  He dressed up just for me.

  “My God,” Matt says, breaking me from my thoughts, “Holly, you look beautiful.”

  I let him inside, and Matt’s eyes move over me. My skin prickles in delight at the desire I see in his blue eyes.

  “You’ve never looked more handsome,” I say as he brings me into his arms.

  “Well, Chris Pine has done the double-breasted tux, so I figured I had to keep up if I didn’t want to lose you to him. You are sexy as hell tonight, Snow Angel.”

  I put my index finger over his full lips. “You’ll never lose me. Even to Chris Pine.”

  Matt smiles as he wraps his hand over mine. “I don’t know. Matt Rhinelander, Chris Pine. Big decision. You might not want to commit yet.”

  Oh, if he only knew I was already madly in love with him.

  “I’m all in on you,” I say, speaking from my heart.

  “Good,” Matt says, cupping the base of my head with his hand and lowering his mouth to mine.

  He kisses me slowly and gently, and I have nothing but love for him as I kiss him back.

  I break the kiss and slide my hands to his face. “But you know why I’m all in, don’t you?”

  A sexy smile tugs at the corner of his mouth. “Mmmm, not sure. Probably because I score a lot of goals, right?”

  “No. It’s dat ass tho. I’m all in because of dis ass,” I say, laughing as I reach around and squeeze his wonderful butt.

  He bursts out laughing, and oh, how I love the sound of his laugh.

  “I should be livid that you treat me like a sex object.”

  “Come on, you know I’m with you for more than your ass.”

  “Yes, I do,” Matt says, bending down and placing a quick kiss on my lips. “Are you ready?”

  “I’m excited,” I say, picking up my coat, which Matt helps me put on. He grabs my overnight bag and waits as I pause to lock up the house.

  “Sorry I can’t take you out to dinner,” Matt says once we are in the car and he is backing out of the driveway. “But us being out like this would raise a lot of questions I don’t want to answer right now.”

  I nod. “I agree.”

  “So we’re spending our New Year’s Eve at my place. Dinner and dancing included.”

  “I can’t wait,” I say. “I’m so excited about this.”

  “Yeah, me too.”

  Before I know it we’re back at his house in Preston Hollow. Matt parks the car in his garage and hurries around to open my door for me, which I find incredibly sweet and romantic.

  He takes my hand in his and leads me in through the back door.

  “Okay, you have to stay right here for a second,” Matt says, stopping me in the washer and dryer room. “I have to get the living room ready. No peeking around the corner.”

  I grin at him. “I promise. Cross my heart,” I add, crossing my finger over my heart in an ‘X’ shape.

  Matt smiles. “That’s not necessary. You’d never lie to me. You’re one of the most honest people I’ve ever met.”

  Then he bounds out of the room to set up my surprise.

  As soon as he turns the corner, my smile falls. Sickness rushes through me as his words cut to my heart.

  If only Matt knew the truth about that stupid deal. The deal I never would have agreed to if I knew what was in Matt’s heart. It hasn’t been a deal since Matt kissed me for the first time. All of that went away but not to Nate and Harrison.

  Matt would be devastated if he thought for even a second I was using him for financial gain.

  It would be like his mother all over again.

  A chill races down my spine.

  He’d never forgive me.

  I hear “This Is What You Came For” begin playing.

  The first song we danced to.

  Matt comes back to me, his hand extended and a beautiful smile lighting up his face.

  “Do you remember this song?”

  I see the affection in his eyes as he takes my hand in his, and my heart rips in half. If I told him now, would he forgive me? If I was up front, would he believe that I love him and this deal was never truly a deal in my heart?

  “Holly?”

  I blink, and Matt’s face has grown serious.

  “What?” I asked, distracted.

  “Are you okay?”

  No. I can’t tell him. It will always be a secret. Harrison and Nate promised me that.

  I have to trust they will keep their word.

  “It’s the first song we danced to,” I say, shoving the deal out of my head and smiling at Matt.

  “Very good,” he says, leading me into the house. “I’d hate to think a writer would forget our first dance.”

  “Forget it? It was everything I ever dreamed of,” I say, reliving the moment. “I was with you. It was all I had ever want—”

  I stop speaking when we reach the living room.

  Matt has created the New Year’s Eve I’ve always dreamed of.

  The TV is playing a New Year’s Eve countdown show. Candles are flickering all around the room. Confetti is everywhere as if it just dropped from the ceiling. I see a bottle of champagne chilling in a silver bucket with two flutes beside it.

  He did all of this for me.

  I turn to face him. He is standing in his designer tux waiting to see if he had created the holiday I had always wanted.

  I can’t speak. I take a moment to gather myself, putting my hands on his lapels.

  “You,” I say, “are the most amazing man I’ve ever met. This is the most romantic thing a man could do. I’m so lucky right now. I’m the luckiest woman in the world to have you.”

  Matt cradles my face in his hands. “Happy New Year’s Eve, Snow Angel.”

  I close my eyes for him to kiss me, but Matt moves back.

  “Wait, it has to be a confetti kiss,” he says, grinning.

  Love fills me as he reaches down to the table and scoops up a handful of confetti. He tosses it in the air so it falls down over us as we kiss.

  We both start laughing, and as he breaks the kiss, I see the confetti sticking in his golden curls like I dreamed of year after year.

  And now it’s real.

  “I’m so happy right now,” I say.

  “Me too.”

  He presses hi
s forehead to mine. “I have dinner in the kitchen.”

  “Maybe I’m hungry for something else,” I say, winding my fingers through his silky hair.

  “You could convince me to wait,” he whispers as he kisses me.

  I lose myself in his kiss as he sweeps his hands over me. They move through my hair, down my spaghetti straps, to the neckline of my sequined dress. Suddenly he stops kissing me.

  “What the hell?” Matt says, reaching into my dress.

  “What are you doing?”

  Matt lifts up his finger, showing me a contact lens balanced on the tip.

  “Um, sweetheart, do you normally store contact lenses in your dress?”

  Oh my God.

  My face burns red-hot as I stare at the contact lens. Matt’s mouth curves up in that smirk I love, and I can’t help but burst out laughing.

  “Um, I lost that earlier,” I admit, giggling. “Apparently it fell in my dress.”

  Matt grins wickedly at me. “Anything else you have stored down there? Umbrella? Cell phone?”

  I playfully push on his chest, and he wraps his hand over mine.

  “No,” I declare.

  Matt’s blue eyes dance at me. “I adore you.”

  “Because I’m weird and can’t put in contacts?”

  “I adore everything about you. You’re real. And you’re mine.”

  And as he kisses me again, I know I’ll always be his.

  Forever.

  “This steak is so good,” I say, taking another bite of the bone-in filet mignon. “It melts in your mouth!”

  After making love in the living room and enjoying a nice bubble bath together afterward, we finally got around to eating dinner. I’m dressed now in my Ravenclaw T-shirt and flannel pajama bottoms, with Harry Potter socks and a topknot. Matt has donned a pair of sweatpants and a black T-shirt, and we’re both blissfully happy. We can be dressed up and dancing or eating in his kitchen in sweats. It doesn’t matter, as long as we’re together.

  “These au gratin potatoes are amazing,” Matt says, putting some more on his plate. “I might eat them all. I mean, you made me work hard as your sex object tonight, I need the fuel.”

  I feel my cheeks heat. “Shut up.”

  “I’m not complaining.”

  I pour myself a little more red wine, and I’m about to take a sip when I see Puck has entered the kitchen.

  “Matt,” I whisper excitedly, “Puck is here.”

  This is the first time Puck has come out of the bedroom since Matt brought him home.

  “What?” Matt says, turning to look over his shoulder.

  Puck sits calmly on the hardwood floor in the kitchen.

  “Hey, Puck,” Matt says affectionately. “Want a treat?”

  He slowly gets up so as not to scare Puck, but Puck doesn’t look skittish at all. He looks like he trusts Matt and me.

  Matt grabs a bag of freeze-dried chicken and sits down on the kitchen floor a few feet away from Puck. He lays a few pieces on the floor, and we both watch as Puck strolls over and begins to eat.

  “Good job, buddy,” Matt says.

  After Puck finishes eating, he walks right up and onto Matt’s lap.

  “Hey,” Matt says, grinning. “Nice to see you.”

  Matt gently strokes Puck, then carefully picks him up and holds him to his chest.

  Oh, I’m melting.

  “Look at this,” Matt says, his eyes wide. “He trusts me.”

  “Of course he does,” I say softly. “He knows you’ll never hurt him.”

  A look of awe passes over his face. “I . . . I’ve never had people trust me outside the rink like this. Like you. Like Puck.”

  “You deserve to be trusted,” I say, reaffirming this for Matt because he needs to believe it as much as I do.

  Matt lets Puck nuzzle his chin, and then he sets him down on the floor.

  “I have something for you,” I say, knowing this is the time to give Matt the present I brought for him.

  Matt’s face shows surprise. “You do?”

  “You eat. I’ll go get it.”

  I slowly move past Puck so I don’t scare him, and then I bound upstairs to the bedroom where I stashed my overnight bag. I retrieve a box and head back to the kitchen.

  “This is for you. I’ll explain it after you open it,” I say, placing the box beside Matt’s plate on the table.

  “What did I do to deserve a present?”

  “I could name a million things you’ve done, but at the very top of the list is simply being you.”

  Matt smiles and unwraps the box, revealing a shoebox.

  “Shoes?” Matt asks.

  “No,” I say, laughing. “Open it!”

  Matt carefully lifts off the lid and finds rows and rows of sealed letters.

  “What is this?” Matt asks, retrieving one. He reads the writing on the envelope aloud. “Open for Demons at Miami, January 23.”

  “I wrote you a letter for every game you have on the road,” I explain. “But you have to wait until game day to see my thoughts. There are other letters, too. For when you have a shit day or when you miss me. But they are all about how I feel about you. What you mean to me. I don’t ever want you to forget how much I adore you.”

  Matt’s fingertips skim over the letters, one for every game from now until when the season ends in April, plus extra letters based on how he feels.

  He slowly lifts his gaze to meet mine, and I’m surprised to see his eyes are watery.

  “This,” he says, his voice thick, “is the best gift I’ve ever received. Thank you.”

  I blink back my own tears. I know Matt means those words with all his heart.

  “You deserve them,” I say, reaching for his hand across the table.

  “I don’t think I do,” he says softly. “I keep thinking someday you’ll wake up and realize you can do better, Holly.”

  “Don’t you dare say that,” I say, shaking my head. “You’re all I could ever want and more.”

  Forever, my heart adds.

  “There’s even a letter in there for when you get mad at me,” I continue.

  A confused look passes over his handsome face. “Mad? Why would I ever be mad at you?”

  “Because we’re human beings and you will get mad at me at some point,” I say. “That letter is to remind you of why we’re together.”

  “Well, that was a waste of ink because I don’t ever plan on opening that,” he says.

  I smile affectionately at him. “Oh, you will. I have flaws.”

  “Well, storing your contacts in your dress is one, but that doesn’t piss me off.”

  I burst out laughing, and he does, too.

  This is what I live for now. Moments like this with Matt. We’re building a life together now, I know we are. We’re being vulnerable with each other. We’re growing up. We’ve found something together that brings out the best in each other.

  I’m holding on to it with both hands.

  And I’m never letting it go.

  Chapter 29

  The Game Plan for February 9th

  √Meet Reese for lunch in Uptown.

  Pick up canned cat food for Puck.

  Appointment with therapist at 3:30.

  Confirm work schedule at barre studio next week.

  TRY TO FIGURE OUT THIS BLACK MOMENT.

  As I sit at a table at an upscale Italian bistro in Uptown, I review the list in my agenda, thinking how much they have changed since December 31st.

  I have a part-time job at The Barre/The Booty, working twenty hours a week. I answer the phone, greet clients, and work on arranging floor displays. It’s not hard, and if all the work is done and nobody is in the studio, th
e owner doesn’t mind if I write to pass the time.

  I had my first appointment with a therapist in mid-January, and just like he said he would, Matt went with me. The session was validating, and the therapist assured me my social anxiety was not unusual in any way. We talked about cognitive behavior therapy and how I can continue to build on what I’m already doing. I left the session feeling good about myself. While I can’t get rid of my social anxiety, I can manage it and learn to function normally, which is more than I ever dreamed of.

  Puck is doing amazing and has come out of his shell with Matt and me. I have to say, he’s definitely Matt’s cat, though. They have a special bond, and Puck is never far from Matt when he’s home. And after a few failed attempts, Matt is now a master of glucose testing.

  Matt.

  I’m so in love with him it’s crazy. We’re together any time our schedules permit. He hasn’t said “I love you,” but I think he might on Valentine’s Day. But even if he doesn’t, I know what’s in his heart, and that’s me.

  I sigh. We haven’t told Nate yet, but I think we will soon. As soon as Matt confirms he’s feeling what I am, Nate has to be told because I don’t want to hide it anymore. Let him freak out and get over it, and then we can all move on with our lives. What is he going to do, anyway? He’ll pull the overprotective big brother thing, and we’ll prove him wrong. Period.

  Of course that might make things very difficult in the Demons’ dressing room. But if there’s one thing I know about both of them, they’re professionals. Personal feelings aside, Nate and Matt would play together on the ice like nothing happened for the team’s sake.

  Ouch.

  I put a hand over my stomach. It has been hurting a bit the few past days. It can’t be stress because I’m not stressed about anything. I’ll go to the doctor next week if it doesn’t get better.

  “Hey Topknot Twin,” Reese says, slipping into a chair across from me. “How are you?”