The Wonder of His Love: A Christian Romance (Fostered by Love Book 1)

by Kimberly Rae Jordan

  After saying good night, Finn stepped back out into the cold and made his way to the loaner he’d driven over to borrow Tennyson’s much nicer car. He wasn’t entirely sure why, but it seemed that the issue with his truck had somehow brought something to the surface with Noella.

  As he slid behind the wheel, Finn realized that he had a better idea now of why Noella had been interested in Bennett McFadden. From outward appearances, Bennett definitely appeared to be the more successful of the two of them, but maybe Noella had Googled Finn and discovered that appearances weren’t everything. Was that why she’d decided that it would be okay to accept his date invitation?

  That conniving type of attitude didn’t fit with what Finn had seen of Noella over the past year, though. It certainly hadn’t been something he’d noticed as he’d begun to fall in love with her. Had he been blind?

  Finn gave his head a shake. He’d learned young how to spot people who weren’t genuine. At least he’d thought he had. No. There was no way that he’d misjudged Noella that badly. Part of that belief came from what he knew of the people who surrounded her. Tennyson, Forrest, and Erin were down to earth, genuine people, and he didn’t think they’d be close with Noella if they thought she was conniving and manipulative. Erin trusted the woman with their business for goodness sake.

  And in reality, when Finn thought about it, her questions showed her to be opposite. She wasn’t out to get his money. It was more that she was trying to protect her own so that she could take care of herself. Of course, that meant she didn’t trust him which wasn’t much better. They’d known each other for almost a year now. Surely she knew that he was trustworthy.

  He still wasn’t sure why she had asked him what she did. What had made it so important that she be in a relationship where there was such a separation between finances? He’d always assumed that when he married there would be some separation of finances—his grandmother and father would insist on that—but his own money and his wife’s would be shared, and it wouldn’t matter who made more and who made less.

  More than anything, it hurt Finn to think that Noella didn’t trust him to take care of her. That for some reason, she assumed she would have to be the one to take care of herself. He wanted a marriage like his parents had. His dad had set a high standard for how to treat the woman he loved. Brice had followed that example when he’d married his wife, Gemma, and Finn planned to do the same.

  But where did he and Noella stand now? His reaction to her questions had clearly left her with the impression that things weren’t going to go any further between the two of them and perhaps that was for the best.

  Or maybe he needed to spend some more time praying about it and then approach her again, this time to ask why she felt that such a financial agreement was necessary. Maybe if he understood where she was coming from, they could work together to come to some sort of compromise. It felt a bit odd to be discussing something that pertained to marriage when they hadn’t even gone on a second date, but Finn had asked her out with the thought in mind that their relationship would lead in that direction. He wasn’t just dating Noella to get to know her—he already knew her. Or he had thought he did.

  As he closed the door to his trailer, Finn dropped his keys into the bowl on the small table beside the closet. He hung up his jacket and took off his boots before heading to the kitchen. Given the mess with his truck, he’d barely had time to run home to shower and change before going to pick up Tennyson’s car and heading over to get Noella. He hadn’t had time to get anything to eat for supper, and because he’d been driving, he hadn’t been able to get anything other than the doughnuts and coffee.

  He opened his fridge and pulled out some leftover spaghetti sauce and noodles. As he waited for the food to heat in the microwave, Finn contemplated what he should do next. Part of him wanted to talk to Tennyson and Forrest about it, but just like the last time he’d thought about doing that, he dismissed it. His best guess was that something in Noella’s past had created this need for financial segregation.

  When the microwave dinged, Finn pressed the button to open the door and retrieve his food. He found he wasn’t as hungry as he’d thought, but he forced himself to eat anyway. If he didn’t, he’d likely wake up in the middle of the night starving. Once he was done, he cleaned up, checked his email, then crawled into bed. He had another busy day ahead of him, and he was already tired.

  The next morning, Finn was at work just after seven. Though the garage didn’t open for another hour, he wanted to get his truck moved out of the bay it was sitting in because they had a full day of repairs. After that, he took the time to catch up on some paperwork for his accountant. Once the day was underway in the garage, he’d scoot out and see what he could find for wheels.

  His manager came in about half an hour later, and they chatted about the plan for the day. Finn’s phone rang as the manager went to open the bay doors. He hoped it might be Noella, but his heart fell when he saw it was a long distance number. That was usually what popped up when he got a call from his family. It was rare that they called him out of the blue in the middle of the day like that.

  “Hello?”

  “Finn, my lad?” His father’s voice washed over him.

  Finn froze in his chair, his heart pounding. “What’s wrong, Dad?”

  “It’s your gran, lad. We think she had a heart attack. We had to have an ambulance come and take her to A&E just a bit ago.”

  Finn bent to rest his forehead on his hand. “Is she going to be okay, Dad?”

  “We’re not sure, my lad. I think it would be best if ye would come home to see her.”

  Bile rose in Finn’s throat. He couldn’t lose his gran. It seemed to take forever before he was able to respond. “I’ll book the first ticket out that I can.”

  “It’s already done. I had Sean take care of it as soon as we realized what was happening. Check your email.”

  “Thanks, Dad. I’ll see ye soon.”

  “Love ye, lad.”

  “Love ye too.”

  Finn sat there for a moment, willing his heart to stop racing. After a minute, he checked his email on the phone and saw that he had four hours to get himself ready and to the airport. He called his manager back into the office and let him know what was going on. The man assured Finn he’d take care of everything and told him to leave.

  On his way home, he placed a call to the manager of the trailer park. He wanted her to know that if she needed him, he’d be unavailable except by email. Though he had responsibilities in Winnipeg, he’d made sure to have people in place to help him out if necessary, and he trusted the managers he’d chosen to carry on in his absence.

  Once at the trailer, it didn’t take him too long to pack his bag with clothing and essentials. Whatever he forgot, he could get once he got to Edinburgh. Most important was his cell phone and his laptop. He would need those in order to continue to monitor his responsibilities from afar.

  When the cab he’d phoned for arrived, Finn was more than ready to get the trip underway. His leg bounced impatiently as the cab sat in traffic on the way to the airport. He texted Brice to get an update and was happy when his brother responded right away.

  Still waiting for test results. She’s alert and talking. Which, of course, means she’s trying to run the hospital. Looking forward to seeing ya.

  Finn felt some of the tension in his chest ease at the news. If Gran was being feisty with the hospital staff, she mustn’t be too bad. But he knew that her situation could change in a moment, so he wasn’t about to alter his plans.

  ***

  Friday was busy at work, so Noella was able to escape having to give Erin details of the previous night. She was going to tell her everything eventually because she needed some advice but not just yet. Noella had no idea how to go back to just being friends with Finn after what she’d done, and she hoped that Erin could help her out.

  Finn hadn’t contacted her, which really wasn’t too surprising, but she’d still harbored a b
it of hope. For what, she wasn’t sure. He’d made his position pretty clear so unless she was willing to just set aside everything she believed in, there wouldn’t be anything more between them relationship-wise

  When Noella got home later that night, Erin was in the kitchen doing some baking. It smelled delicious, but Noella hoped there was some actual food since she hadn’t eaten anything all day. Her stomach had been in knots most the day, but now she wanted food.

  “Hey,” Noella said as she joined Erin in the kitchen. She looked around at the goodies cooling on the racks on the counters. “Are you working on an order here?”

  Erin shook her head. “Well, not one that I’m going to be delivering.” She gestured to a batch of cupcakes sitting next to her. “I wanted to try out a new recipe for an order we got.”

  “Someone special?” Noella asked. Erin didn’t usually go to this effort for just a walk-in.

  “Yep. Mrs. Dawson is having her ninetieth birthday after Christmas, and her grandson came into the bakery to place an order for her party.”

  Noella smiled. Mrs. Dawson had been a faithful customer ever since they’d opened their doors. They had met her at church when Erin had taken some goodies for a women’s retreat. She’d fallen in love with Erin’s chocolate cupcakes then and came by the bakery whenever she could. “Why are you making a new recipe when you already know what she likes?”

  Erin shrugged as she reached over and picked up one of the cupcakes. “I thought I’d try something new.” She handed it to Noella then picked up another one and began to peel off the paper. “I decided to take the recipe I usually used regular coffee in and change it to Belgian chocolate coffee. I also added some dark chocolate chunks since she is such a fan of dark chocolate. I wanted to test them to see if the chunks ended up at the bottom since the mixture is runnier than some of the batters I use. Tell me what you think.”

  Noella decided to try the cupcake since Erin had asked for her opinion and then she’d seek out real food afterward. It was a good thing that she—like Mrs. Dawson—loved chocolate because the cupcake was definitely one of the more chocolatey things Erin had made.

  “It’s delicious, Erin. What’s the frosting you’ll use with it?”

  “I’m thinking a salted caramel. She raved about that one time when we had that combo.”

  As Noella listened to Erin talk about her plans for the order which was a mix of cupcakes and a decorated cake, she was kind of glad that for a few minutes, everything was just normal. And she could pretend that she hadn’t screwed things up with Finn and potentially made all future gatherings with him super awkward.

  “Was there anything for supper?” Noella asked as she opened the fridge.

  Erin frowned. “Ah, sorry. I got caught up in this, but now that you’ve mentioned it, I’m kinda hungry too.”

  “How about some soup?” Noella suggested. “I think we froze a container of it last time you made the beef barley.”

  “That sounds good. I brought some rolls home from the bakery that would go well with that.”

  Noella pulled the container out of the freezer and dumped its contents into a pot on the stove. Erin began to put the cupcakes away. No doubt they’d end up at the bakery the next day for more taste testing by the staff.

  “So…” Erin began as she slid the containers of baked goods to one side of the counter. “How did last night go?”

  Noella pulled two bowls from the cupboard, knowing her reprieve was over. As she stirred the defrosting soup, Noella poured out what had happened with Finn. As usual, Erin listened without interrupting. It wasn’t until the soup was ready and they were seated at the table together that she said something.

  “I don’t think it’s wrong for couples to keep their finances separate,” Erin commented after they’d said grace. “But I guess that’s probably a discussion a couple has to have and agree on together. Maybe Finn has had a different example.”

  “You mean like how his parents handled their finances?” Noella asked as she stirred her soup.

  Erin nodded. “It sounds like you and Finn come from opposite ends of the spectrum when it comes to how you each expect finances to be handled in a relationship. It’s not that one of you is right and the other wrong. It’s just something that a couple would need to discuss together.”

  “It doesn’t really matter, I guess.” Noella took a spoonful of soup. “I think Finn decided that it wasn’t worth trying to work through. In his mind, what I was asking for would mean that I didn’t trust him and how could I love him if I didn’t trust him.”

  “Is he right? Could you love him without trusting him enough to have a discussion on it? One that might involve you compromising your stance on how to do finances together?” Erin reached for a roll then pulled the butter container closer. “I know why you brought it up with him since we talked about this earlier, but I think you may have caught him off-guard. After all, it was just a first date, and you were bringing up financial matters that only a more serious couple would tackle. Maybe given some time to think about it, Finn might be willing to talk about it again.”

  Yeah, he might be willing to, but Noella wasn’t so sure he would.

  Her shoulders slumped as she thought back to her conversation with her mom. Her mom had found that there were nice guys out there, and her gut told her that Finn was one of them, but was it too late now to try to talk things through with him? Was she destined to make a few mistakes in her life before finding her “Dave?” And instead of getting involved with the wrong guys, would her mistakes be turning away the good ones? The thought of that made her stomach turn, and the hunger she’d had earlier vanished. Maybe she would just be better off staying single.

  “Don’t even think that,” Erin said, pointing at her with the knife she’d been using to butter her roll.

  Noella stared at her. Had she said that out loud?

  “I know what you’re thinking. That it would be easier to just stay single and not have to deal with it all.”

  “You’re not wrong,” Noella murmured as she continued to swirl her spoon through the soup. “Maybe it’s a sign that because of my particular issues, it would be better to just stay unmarried and deal with my own finances.”

  Erin reached over and patted Noella’s arm. “Don’t think that way. You need to be challenged to move past your issues. Pray about it and make sure that you’re following God’s will and not just making decisions out of fear and your own thoughts and emotions.”

  “I hate you,” Noella muttered.

  Erin slid off her chair and draped her arm over Noella’s shoulders. “I know you do. And I give you permission to hand it all back to me when my turn comes.” She pressed a kiss to the top of Noella’s head. “Love you.”

  “Love you, too.”

  Noella still had no clue how to move forward with the Finn situation—either as friends or something more. He hadn’t contacted her, and she had no idea what to say if she contacted him. And she still wasn’t sure she could put aside the plan she’d always had for her life. People might say she was overreacting, but until they had the experience of being abandoned by their only parent, they shouldn’t judge her. Did she have issues? Sure she did. And as far as she was concerned, she was entitled to those.

  Except that they were now messing with her ability to be with the man she loved. For years she had figured that it would be easy to resist love and stick to her plan, but that was before Finn had entered her life. Her feelings for him had snuck up on her and suddenly, before she knew it, she was looking forward to seeing him. She would find herself eagerly joining into group activities that included Finn. When she’d realized what was happening, she had started trying to avoid places where he was, but that had been nearly impossible.

  Case in point, the night that had started all of this, and which had led to her current state.

  Confused. Hurting. And wishing desperately for a do-over for Thursday night.

  9

  Finn climbed the stairs to the se
cond floor of the manor, looking appreciatively at the greenery that was draped along the staircase. He carried a tray that held a pot of tea, a china cup on a saucer and a plate with several of the oatmeal chocolate chip cookies he’d made earlier. As he’d pulled them from the oven, he couldn’t help but think back to the batch he’d made for Noella.

  It had been a week since that disastrous end to their date, and she was never far from his thoughts. His gran had been the main focus of his attention, but Noella lingered on the edges of whatever he did. He was still trying to figure out how he felt about what she’d asked him. Was this something she would ever soften her outlook on?

  He knew that there were couples who operated much the way she wanted to, but it wasn’t something he’d ever wanted for him and his future wife. And if anyone had reason to have a prenup and a financial agreement, it would be him, but he’d been prepared to go without one because he had planned to marry just once and his wife would be entitled to whatever he had.

  “Hello, Gran,” he said as he walked into her room which was festive with its own set of Christmas decorations. Because she spent so much time in her rooms, having the decorations there helped put her in the Christmas spirit.

  The nurse they’d hired when she’d insisted on being released from the hospital was standing next to her chair taking her blood pressure. Even though she was restricted on activities for the time being, her hair and makeup were still impeccably done. Finn knew that his mom did that for Gran now since she knew how important it was to her mother-in-law to look presentable. For all that his gran would grouse about his mom, he knew that they were close. Particularly since her own daughter—his dad’s older sister—had very little to do with Gran.

  Finn put the tray on the table at her elbow then bent to press a kiss to a soft cheek, inhaling the scent that he would forever associate with her. It was a fragrance made up of, among other things, orange blossoms, lily of the valley and sandalwood. Though it was a scent that had always let him know that his grandmother had been in a room by how it lingered in the air, it wasn’t a heavy fragrance, and it suited his gran quite well.