Shadowed Lover

by Lauren Dawes

  Mila’s expression looked pained. She glanced at the door then back at Katya. “I’m sorry, Kat. I can’t. I belong here now.”

  “But… But…”

  Mila just shook her head. “I didn’t get to choose who my mother was. I didn’t get to choose what kind of life I wanted, but I can choose this. He’s a good man. He looks after me.” She looked to Jett. “He’s keeping his word to my brother.”

  Jett’s stared at the guy, and when he nodded, Jett returned the gesture. He could leave Mila here, knowing that Robby would protect her just like he would.

  “Come on, Kat,” he eventually said. “We should go.”

  “But you could come back.” Mila spoke quickly. To Jett, she said, “You could come back whenever you want to see me.”

  “I—” He cleared his throat. “I’d like that.”

  “Good,” she replied. “Good.” And with that declaration, she turned around and ran back to the house. Her boyfriend wrapped his arms around her, planting a kiss on the top of her head.

  “What now?” Katya asked as they wandered back to his Ducati.

  Sliding on his helmet, he said, “We go home.”

  39

  Neve stared out the passenger side window, gazing at her reflection. She, along with Drake, Mateo, and Sasha had slept for nearly five hours in the end, leaving the motel a little before dark. Drake had been moving a lot better after resting, and although Sasha wasn’t favoring her leg as much, she’d still remained in her cat’s form. Neve could understand why—shifting with a broken bone was the definition of insanity.

  In less than an hour, they’d arrive at the Shadows’ compound, and her parents would finally be laid to rest on their pride’s lands. Her heart felt heavy, like it would simply drop out of her chest if her ribcage wasn’t there holding things in place. Drake reached out and took her hand in his, bringing it to his mouth and placing a kiss in the center of her palm. His compassion and love was a warm light heating her body, and she found herself relaxing.

  Her mate did that.

  Her mate, who loved her and protected her, even when he was mortally wounded, his cat making sure she was safe. Her mate, who let her make her decisions for herself and gave her opinions thought and consideration.

  Drake cleared his throat. “Have you thought about where you want to bury your parents?”

  She nodded. She’d thought of nothing else for the past twelve hours as they drove back to Wyoming. “There’s a meadow out the back of our…the pride house.” As much as she wanted to think of it as hers still, it wasn’t. It was not her home anymore, not with her parents gone. “They used to have picnics under an oak tree in the middle of it. They’d be happy there.”

  “Sounds perfect.” He kissed her hand once more, but kept his eyes on the road.

  Eventually, he said, “I really am sorry if I rushed the blood bond.”

  She shook her head. “No, you were right to do it. I don’t regret it at all.”

  He grinned at her, and she decided she liked it when he genuinely smiled. “Good, because I’ve known I wanted to bind myself to you since the first time I saw your cat.”

  As much as she wanted to just be happy and content that she’d finally found her mate, there was something still bothering her, and the longer she tried to ignore it, the more the idea would fester.

  She didn’t want it to fester.

  “Do you want to know what terrifies me?”

  He glanced over, looking at her through his dark lashes. “Knowing you, it would be losing your independence in our relationship.”

  Giving his hand a squeeze, she extricated herself and rubbed her palms over her knees. “I fought my parents so hard to not be pigeon-holed into a role. As the Leo’s daughter, there were certain expectations of me, but I wasn’t ever happy conceding and condemning myself just to be someone’s mate, someone’s mother.”

  “And I wouldn’t want to break that spirit either.”

  She gave him a sharp look. “You say that now, Drake, but what about five or ten years from now? What if you get tired of waiting for me to conform into the female you want?”

  “You are already the female I want.”

  Shaking her head, she drummed her fingers on her thigh. “I want more from my life than just being someone’s mate.”

  “You know, you’ve told me all the things you don’t want to be, but you haven’t told me what you do want.”

  Neve was quiet for a moment. “I want to be a Leo.”

  Drake was momentarily stunned into silence.

  “I see my aspirations have scared you,” she dryly. Shrugging, she added, “I won’t apologize for it. You’re the only person who knows. Clearly, it’s never going to happen, so you can forget I mentioned it. With my father gone, my uncle will step into the role until the pride can vote on a new Leo.”

  “Neve,” he said seriously. “You can do whatever you put your mind to. I’m not going to tell you that you can’t, because that would be hypocritical.”

  “In what way?”

  “Well, a lot of jaguars would say that females can’t make good soldiers, but all you have to do is look at Sasha to see that that’s a load of shit.”

  She gave him a small smile. “Like I said, it doesn’t matter anyway.”

  “If it’s important to you, of course it matters. Look, I can’t promise I won’t overreact when you’re in a dangerous situation, but there are some things I can promise you.”

  “What are they?” she asked hesitantly.

  “I will always love you, and I will always support you. So, if you want to become the Leo of the Black Claw pride, then I will do everything in my power to make that happen.”

  “You don’t think it’s a stupid idea?” Her question was a whisper, the truth of his words meaning more to her than she could articulate.

  “‘Do not follow where the path may lead. Go instead where there is no path and leave a trail.’”

  Grinning, she said, “Ralph Waldo Emerson.”

  “I think if you want to be Leo, forge the path yourself. I think you’re stubborn enough to break all the molds.”

  “Drake?”

  “Hmm?” he replied, his eyes on the road.

  “I love you.”

  His eyes were molten as he said, “I love you, too.”

  * * *

  When they reached the gates of the Shadows’ compound, Neve’s heart was trying to claw out of her throat. As Drake guided the car up the drive, efficiently rolling through the security checkpoints, she craned her neck to see if the pride’s doctor was there with the ambulance to take her parents away.

  Her fingers curled around the door handle when she spotted the dark blue Ford E-350 Emergency vehicle parked in the drive. It looked like all the other Wyoming ambulances with the large picture of some native wildlife emblazoned on the side, but the signage stated it belonged to a private medical facility.

  Drake wrapped his fingers around the back of her neck, stroking his thumb over her carotid, slowing her pulse with each sweep. “You’re not doing this alone. I’ll be by your side the whole time.”

  She blew out a breath and nodded. “I know. Thank you.”

  He brought the car to a stop at the far end of the turning circle and shut off the engine. Neve opened her door and glanced over to see the Mercedes van pulling in behind them. With Drake by her side, they walked into the house to find Grayson and Doctor Winchester sitting at the large table in the dining room.

  “Neve,” the doctor said, standing up and coming toward her. He took her hand, shaking it slowly. “I am so sorry for the loss of your parents.”

  “Thank you,” she replied stiffly. “What’s going to happen to them?”

  The doctor shifted his gaze to Drake briefly. “We’ll take them to the morgue and prepare them for burial. Have you thought about…?”

  “The meadow behind the pride house,” she supplied. “How soon can we bury them?”

  He bobbed his head. “Within the next forty-
eight hours.”

  “Fine. Thank you.” Turning to Drake, she said, “Now, if you’ll all excuse me, I think I need to lie down for a little while.”

  40

  Drake never took his gaze off Neve as she went. His mate was hurting, but he fought the urge to chase after her. She needed some time to herself—especially now.

  “Thank you for coming, Doc,” he said. “Mateo will help you with the Leo and his mate.”

  “Ah, yes, of course,” Winchester said, taking his cue. Drake showed him from the house, then returned to the dining room.

  Grayson gave him a wan smile. “How are you holding up, boss?”

  He ran a hand through his hair. “Honestly, a lot of shit went down, and I’m still trying to process it all.”

  “Mateo said as much. Who do you think was behind the attack on the Leos?”

  Pulling out one of the chairs, Drake sat down and clasped his hands in front of him. “Lewis could’ve been working alone, but what would his motive be?”

  “Or he could’ve been working with the whole Specter team. But like you said, what was the point? What did they stand to gain by killing all the Leos, their mates, and the captains of the Shadows?”

  Grayson grunted. “Nothing. They destroyed the hierarchy of the prides in the attack, creating anarchy until new Leos can be elected. It also leaves a vacuum in the Shadows’ ranks.”

  “Which would make them the muscle for whoever’s calling the shots.”

  “But who does that leave us with?” Drake leaned back in his chair, tilting his head back until he was looking at the ceiling. “The Trinity. They’re the only logical choice.”

  Grayson exhaled on a steady stream. “That’s a dangerous theory.”

  He acknowledged that with a nod. “Yes, but if it looks like a duck and quacks like a duck, why would I call it something else?”

  “And what would they have to gain from an attack like this?”

  Now that, Drake had no idea. “Fuck if I know, Gray, but I can guarantee I’ll find out. For now, we have to notify the prides of the deaths.” Drake stood up and stretched out the kink in his neck. “Where’s Jett?”

  “Upstairs,” Grayson replied, his words careful. “Something else happened while you were away.”

  His word were grave, his expression somber, and Drake braced himself for more bad news. Seriously, what else could go wrong? “Just tell me.”

  “His mom died.”

  “Fuck.” He ran a hand through his hair. “How’s he holding up?”

  Grayson looked in the direction of the foyer. “As well as can be expected. He wants Katya to stay here rather than return home.”

  “What are your thoughts on that?”

  Grayson’s shoulders lifted slightly in a shrug. “I think the prides are fractured and we should look after our own, since we currently don’t know who’s friend and who’s foe.”

  Drake smiled despite himself. “The sapling needs protection from the oak.”

  “What?”

  He shook his head. “Just something Sasha told me.” He clapped Grayson on the shoulder. “We can talk more after I sleep.”

  “You got it, boss.”

  41

  Katie was shivering, although it had nothing to do with being cold. Weaving on her feet, she tried to cover as much of her body as she could, but was forced to drop her arms when Tom snarled at her. She’d promised him no trouble, and if she wasn’t true to her word, she had no doubt he would punish her by punishing Luce.

  Tom continued stalking around her bare body, making all sorts of grotesque statements and noises. He was like an animal in heat, the smell of his lust and the raw alcohol on his breath making her feel sick to her stomach.

  He could’ve taken her quickly, but humiliation was the name of his game.

  Stopping in front of her, he reached out and ran his finger across her collarbones, between her bared breasts, down her stomach, until it reached the place she had not shown to any male before.

  He smirked at her.

  Taunted her with that flex of his lips.

  “I bet you really are a virgin,” he drawled.

  Pressing her lips together more tightly, she kept the promise she’d made to herself—she wouldn’t cry. She wouldn’t give him that satisfaction.

  He shoved her forward with a hand between her shoulder blades. Her face made contact with the wall first, then her body. She was instantly chilled to the bone. Behind her, Tom pressed himself against her, a fetid blanket of his lust and anticipation covering her. She was sure there was a special place in hell for men like this.

  He hadn’t bothered to take her far. They were only a few feet from the cells and the other women, but the hallway gave them some measure of privacy. Tom was still fully clothed—yet another symbol of the power he wielded over her.

  Pinning her arms above her head, he dragged his free hand down her back, over her ass. Pushing aside the revulsion, she gritted her teeth and thought about what she would do if she got free. She lost all her bravado, though, when Tom kicked her legs wider.

  The sound of a zipper being drawn down made her pulse race and her mouth dry. This was actually going to happen. She was going to lose her virginity like this. Better her than Luce, though. At least she had the mental capacity to digest this violation.

  Tom caressed her ass once more, running his hand between her legs. She tried to stay still, to not pull away. Resistance would only make him work harder to hurt her more. Then there was something else there at her opening, something blunt and thick, and terror made her throat constrict.

  Instead of letting the fear control her as she had before, she tried to think about what Neve would do. She’d probably lull the guy into a false sense of security then nail him to the wall for touching her uninvited. But Katie wasn’t her cousin. She was not violent. She was a gentle soul…

  But maybe she could change that.

  She’d realized that if she or one of the other females didn’t get themselves out of this mess, then it was very likely they were all going to die there, and she had no intention of dying here.

  Not today.

  Not tomorrow.

  And certainly not when she was the apex predator in this situation. Even as weakened as she was, she still had a spitting, hissing black jaguar inside her body, and she was her best weapon. Katie abhorred violence, but the human and the cat weren’t always so in sync. She had been fantasizing about ripping their captors’ throats out for days now. She had been showing Katie just how easy it would be.

  All she needed was the opportunity.

  She was stunned when he released her arms, his hands coming to rest on her hips, his fingers digging in to the point of pain. Slowly, so it didn’t rouse his suspicion, she lowered her arms and placed her palms against the concrete wall she was being pressed against. Tom leaned forward, placing his nose against her neck—just below her ear—and inhaled. Katie let out a slow breath then threw her head back, nailing him in the nose.

  There was a crunch, followed by a howl of pain. Tom released his hold on her hips as he was no doubt holding his injured nose. Satisfaction curled in her stomach, the feeling both foreign and so familiar that she realized her cat had edged closer to the surface.

  Tom was still bent over at the waist, cupping his hands over his nose. He was too busy cursing her to see where her eyes were fixed. Darting forward with as much speed as she could muster, she reached for the knife that was still attached to his belt. She managed to pop the top clip off, but cried out in frustration and pain when she was shoved away. She’d almost had it—her fingertips had just grazed the hilt.

  Landing in a heap on the bare floor, her sweat-damp skin stopped her from skidding too far. There was a collective gasp, and she looked up, behind her, to the side. She was in the center of the cells with nowhere to run.

  Tom was coming toward her now, blood gushing from his nose, over his lips and chin. She smiled when she saw the deep cut on the bridge of his nose. Scrambling to
get to her feet, she edged backward as he prowled toward her. His face was twisted—a mask of rage and frustration.

  “Think you can outsmart me, huh?” he snarled, wiping the back of his hand over his mouth to clear it of blood. With a cocky sneer, he pulled the knife free and brought it up to show her, twisting the handle until there was that flash again—that light, that spark…

  Katie had retreated until her back collided with the closest cell, her bare shoulders pressing into the cold steel. Tom—thinking he’d caged her in—lunged for her. She side-stepped him, but he still caught a blow on her shoulder, the pain radiating out like a spiderweb from the strike. He swung back around, anger amplifying his features, making him look monstrous.

  “I’ll make you bleed for that,” he threatened, charging for her again. Once more, she side-stepped him without getting hit, using the advantage of the alcohol and rage in his system against him. Again and again, he lunged and she darted out of the way, maneuvering them around the perimeter of the cells.

  Over his shoulder, she caught Leesa standing at the front of her cage, her fingers curled around the steel bars. There was a look of dark satisfaction in her eyes. After a moment, she nodded, and Katie knew what she had to do.

  She let him catch her that time. Sucking in a wince when he grabbed her by the upper arm and spun her around, she barely had time to brace herself before she was slammed against Leesa’s cell. Her face made first contact with the bars, her hip bone on the left taking second place in the race to Agonyville. Pain exploded across her cheek, and her eyes watered from the impact.

  Something sharp was pressed against her neck, and the scent of blood flooded her senses. She tried not to move, to breathe. Leesa came into her line of sight, the determined look still shining in her eyes.

  “Stay back,” Tom barked in warning, the scent of his anticipation riding on the back of the blood. “Stay back or you’re next.”