‘What?’
‘This. What is this?’
He placed the fork down with a long breath and looked across at me.
‘What do you think it is?’
‘Don’t answer my question with another question.’
‘Okay.’ He thought for a moment. ‘I know what this is for me. But what is it to you?’
‘I don’t know.’
‘That’s fine.’ He nodded. ‘But what do you want it to be?’
‘Right now, God. I don’t know Ila.’
His eyes found mine and the hope in them seared me.
‘Then let me talk.’ He said finally, turning his whole body to face me. ‘For me, this is a new hope, maybe a new start, but only if you want it to be. You left for a reason; I know that. I know it will take much more than this to let me in again, and maybe you never will. But God knows I’ll keep trying, because the truth is, I don’t want this to be a one-night thing, I don’t want to go back to New York in a few weeks and regret not telling you this.’ He paused and then he shook his head. ‘I don’t even understand how, or why, I didn’t come here to look for you, I can’t understand it, but you have to believe me Ace, it’s not because I don’t love you or because I didn’t want to.’
Whatever words I had on the tip of my tongue, disappeared. The guilt came back full force. I did that to him.
‘I love you, so much I swear it could kill me.’ He shook his head looking down at the space between us. ‘I’ve never stopped loving you. And if you need me here, like this, then I can do that. If you want to take things slow, then we will, and, if you want me to leave, I’ll leave.’
‘I don’t want you to leave.’ I said truthfully, folding my hand over his. ‘I don’t.’
The way his eyes slowly drifted up from our hands to my eyes, made my heart stutter. He was taking everything in, memorizing it, committing every touch and word to his memory.
‘Okay.’ He nodded, picking up his coffee. ‘I’ll take that.’
We sat in silence, eating and drinking, occasionally I’d catch him looking across and me and smiling, when we finished up, he took the dishes and cleaned everything, all while I sat with my eyes glued to the statuesque man gracefully walking around in my kitchen, in my life, after so long.
Every thought seemed to make sense with him here, but the only one that didn’t, was internal. Deeper than my psyche, or the logical part of my mind. It was deep in my heart—why did I run? We could have worked through it; God knew he was willing to. The heartache was normal, I wasn’t feeling anything surprising, but I let it consume me, completely take over my life, my relationship with him, my job.
Maybe I was a coward and running really was the only thing I was good at.
‘Ace?’
‘Sorry.’ I shook my head.
‘You okay?’
‘Yeah, yeah I’m fine. Did you say something?’
He chuckled, leaning against the counter, giving the door a quick nod. ‘I said there was someone at the door.’
‘Shit.’ I looked up, forgetting completely that I’d told Aurel to come by at ten. ‘It’s Aurel, we’re meant to go for a walk and talk covers.’
Illarion laughed. ‘It’s fine, go get changed, I’ll let him in.’
For a moment I contemplated telling him there was no way in hell, then I stopped myself. This, whatever it was, wasn’t something I could hide, not from Aurel anyway, and if we were going to give us another try, however slow it may be, it wasn’t something to hide.
‘Thank you.’ I forced a smile, rushing back into my room.
Given that the apartment was quite small, sound carried through the walls and given that I could hear a lot better than the average Sensitive, I didn’t miss the door opening or the awkward moment of silence before Aurel figured it out. Then there was a brief exchange of words, mostly Aurel saying how happy he was and Illarion telling him that it was going to take time.
As I pulled on a pair of yoga pants and a sweatshirt, I found myself smiling. Maybe this wasn’t the worst idea after all.
Chapter Seven
Ace
We’d taken the longest possible route just to get to the main path that led to the fountain. Aurel insisted on taking this way though he failed to explain to me why.
‘So, what’s good to do around here?’
‘Dressed like that, not much.’ I laughed.
‘What’s wrong with what I’m wearing?’
I looked down at the lazy tracksuit pants he had on and the bright green Nikes.
‘Nothing.’ I held my hands up. ‘But we both look like we’re about to represent America in high jump in the eighties.’
‘Touché.’
‘We can go for a walk around the lake?’
‘Done.’
After being stuck with coffee from Dahlias and the FBI courtyard, I thought it’d be good to show him something else, I could tell he was getting bored.
So, I took him to the Smithsonian. It was an hour-long walk, with enough to see along the way to keep the conversation light, but not boring.
‘I’ve checked in with Illarion’s contact in Paris, he’s all set for our arrival tomorrow night, he also set out some comms preemptively.’
‘Wasting no time.’
‘Definitely not, especially when the order came straight from Illarion.’
‘Officially?’
‘No, of course not. Etienne owes Illarion so he’s calling in a favor.’
‘And I’m taking it that you don’t know what earned him the favor?’
‘Nope, he doesn’t tell me, and I don’t ask. But it goes way back to when Illarion was in Russia.’
‘Right.’ I muttered. ‘Good to know we’ve got some of our people out there too then.’
‘Agreed, I don’t know how you do it.’
‘Do what?’
‘Work with them, they’re so…slow.’
I chuckled. ‘They’re not all slow, just, mortal.’
‘Exactly, it’s painful. Looking at Belfort think is like watching paint dry.’
I choked on a laugh when I barely managed not to spill my coffee everywhere. He grinned.
‘Pleased with yourself, are you?’
‘Tell me I’m wrong.’
‘You’re not wrong.’ I shielded a smile. ‘It takes some getting used to, but they’re okay.’
‘If you say so, punk.’ He smiled when we reached the lake and I sat by the water turning my face up to the sun, embracing the warmth. ‘This is pretty cool.’ He acknowledged.
‘It’s not New York but it’s nice.’
‘Really nice.’
‘How’s Lucy doing?’ I asked when he peeked up at me through his sunglasses.
‘She’s huge, you have to come and see her.’
‘She’s got to be, what? Two, three months now?’
‘Yeah.’ He chuckled. ‘Three months tomorrow.’
My heart sunk and that shame I’d been carrying for nearly a year, slammed into me almost bowling me over.
‘Aurel, I’m so sorry. I’ve been a shitty friend.’
‘Hey, I get it. We both do.’
‘It’s no excuse.’
Aurel sat up, turning toward me. ‘The last twelve months have been shit for both of you. I can understand that the last thing on your mind is coming back to New York.’
‘It doesn’t matter. I should have come; I should have visited.’
‘You will, when you’re ready.’
It didn’t make me feel any less shitty. The truth was, I was a coward, too scared to face all those people and see the look on their faces.
‘Maybe you can come back and visit soon, with Illarion.’ He suggested.
‘Yeah.’ I turned my face up to the sun again. ‘Maybe.’
‘Look, I’ve been meaning to ask you.’ He said gently, and when I turned to face him, he continued. ‘I’ve looked at the case again.’
‘The one where Matt and I got our asses handed to us?’
‘Yea
h, that one.’
‘What are you thinking?’
‘Ambush, inside job.’
‘You caught that, huh?’
‘Yeah.’ He frowned. ‘So, what’s the real deal?’
‘Real deal is the information I couldn’t put in there. Belfort keeps trying to pacify me, tell me it’s just a coincidence.’
‘But we don’t believe in coincidence.’
‘No, we don’t.’
‘Thought so.’
‘It’s just a precaution for now. But I’d rather be cautious than let my arrogance get my team killed.’
‘I can understand that.’ He agreed, holding his hand out to me. He helped me up and we began our walk back. ‘What is it that’s got you rattled?’
‘I’m not rattled.’
‘Sorry what? I didn’t catch that. Maybe it got lost in the noise of you trying to bullshit me.’
‘Shut up.’ I scoffed with a laugh, nudging him in the side. ‘I’m not bullshitting.’
‘Look, there’s something wise that was once said to me…’
‘Oh, and I bet I’m about to be schooled.’
‘You are, as a matter of fact, so listen up, it’s takes a bullshit artist to know one.’
I snorted through a laugh. ‘Original.’
‘So, what is it?’ He ignored my jab.
‘It could be nothing, it probably is nothing. But a lot of these small-time cases aren’t small at all. I think they’re covering something up because they’re building up to something bigger.’
‘What have you got so far?’
‘Well, aside from the weird ass gas that knocked me the hell out of play yesterday, a few Collectors and Sensitives dropped dead last week.’
‘Dropped dead?’
‘Yep.’ I wet my lips. ‘No sign of struggle, no sign of injury or trauma, weirder than the case files you and Illarion were brought in on.’
‘Okay, where were they found?’
‘Various locations, some at home, in bed, one was out jogging, and another was in the pool.’
‘Was that the Senator I heard about on the news?’
‘Yeah.’
‘Shit, I didn’t know he was a Sensitive.’
‘Yeah neither did I. Turns out he was ashamed about it all, did a hell of a lot of groveling to the non-Sensitive leaders around the country, trying to make ties.’
‘You sound like you know a lot about this guy.’
‘Yeah.’
‘And why do I get a feeling that’s bad?’
‘It’s bad because I was the last one to see him alive.’
‘And this just got a lot more interesting.’ He ran a hand over his jaw. ‘Why were you with the Senator?’
‘Long story short, the Pentagon cut funding to the division I work in, Belfort and I had a planned a meeting to discuss the future of the FBI team. Belfort got called in to another meeting, so I went alone.’
‘Fuck.’ Aurel stopped walking. ‘Why didn’t we get word of this?’
‘Maybe you did, but not the whole story.’
‘This is starting to stink.’
‘It is.’ I tipped my chin and resumed our path. ‘But that is what’s got me rattled. Someone, whoever’s responsible is meddling in some big stuff, serious weapons. And I was there, what if they knew, what if they were waiting until I was gone? What if it isn’t just some small-time crime? What if it’s some sort of targeted Sensitive weapon?’
‘You think that’s what’s in the safe?’
‘I don’t know. After that, and after yesterday, don’t you?’
‘I don’t know, Ace. There are a lot of what ifs there.’
‘Maybe they wanted me there, use me as a scapegoat.’
He shook his head and ran a hand over his jaw.
‘It would make sense, right? All the coincidences and they happen to be every time we get close to getting to the safe.’
‘You know how paranoid that sounds, right?’
‘Paranoia is my life; I live like I’m being stalked every day.’
He stopped, taken aback for a moment.
‘Ace, I’m sorry, I didn’t mean—’
‘It’s fine.’ I shrugged. ‘Used to it, keeps me on my toes. Anyway, no one’s said anything about it to me yet, but I can hear them talk sometimes.’
‘I wish you’d spoken to someone about this.’
‘It’s a moot point now.’
He didn’t press me further. ‘Okay, if it is a weapon, what makes you think that?’
‘It’s these dreams I’ve been having, at first they were just nightmares, nothing unusual, but then they stared to resemble the basic Collector cases the FBI have been working on and more recently, they’ve been like premonitions—I saw the senator in his pool, swimming, and then there was this flash and that was it, he died. No struggle, no pain. Just death.’
‘But you said you weren’t there?’
‘No, I saw it in my mind, like a day before I met with him.’
Aurel looked shaken, but he nodded, motioning for me to keep going.
‘I even suggested that the weather was going to be bad, in hopes that he’d avoid the pool. I couldn’t just tell him, hey, I’m a Divine Sensitive who knows you’re about to die.’
Aurel flinched.
‘Sorry, haven’t had many people to talk to lately.’
‘It’s okay,’ he cocked his head, ‘We all knew you’d evolve rapidly, maybe your Sight sense is evolving to a Seers?’
‘I don’t think so.’ I shook my head. ‘It doesn’t feel like that. Even if it did, what’s killing these people?’
‘True.’ He agreed. ‘What does it feel like?’
‘Like it did before…with Dalca. There’s a certain density in those realms, planes, whatever you want to call them. Doesn’t feel like this world.’
‘As in, the dreams he was catching you in?’
‘Yeah.’
‘What does it feel like in there?’
‘You know when you’re going up in a plane and your ears get blocked, you talk and you can hear yourself, but it’s muffled, like an echo?’
‘Yeah?’
‘But it’s everything, the sounds, the smells, the images, everything is muffled and kind of out of tune.’
‘Okay, but he was really pulling you into his plane then, right?’
Letting a silence settle between us, I wondered how long it’d take him to work out what I was saying. Then, like a switch was flipped, he stopped, turning me.
‘There’s no way, we saw him die, you killed him.’
‘I know. I was there.’ I reminded him. Keeping my eyes on the horizon, behind him. ‘But that’s what this feels like.’
‘Ace.’ He pressed his hands to either of my shoulders. ‘Do you really think he’s back?’
‘I don’t know what I think. I just know how it feels. And it’s not the craziest thing we’ve heard, is it? If I can transcend planes, he can too.’
‘I don’t know Ace. It’s a big call.’
‘You’re not wrong.’ I murmured. ‘But if I’m right, we’re going to have a lot more to worry about than these cover up deaths.’
‘But that’s not all you’re worried about.’
‘No. Peyton’s been digging.’
His eyes narrowed. ‘Knew I didn’t like her.’
‘Sure it’s because of that or because she’s ogling Illarion like she wants to tackle him to the ground whenever they’re in the same room.’ I chuckled.
He knotted his brows. ‘Maybe that too. I’m very protective of him. He’s my little Brother.’
Laughing, I shook my head and nudged him along.
‘So, Peyton. Huh?’
‘Who knows. I just know she doesn’t like me, she doesn’t trust us, and Belfort told me she’s been trying to pull my files.’
‘But she doesn’t know anything yet.’
‘No. They filter through just enough bogus data to keep her occupied.’
‘This sounds insane, but I’ll bite.�
��
‘It’s just a thought. If she’s got it in for our kind, which I know she does, she wouldn’t hesitate to orchestrate something like that. Look at everything Donna did.’ I said with a sigh, her name still made my insides tighten. ‘Or it could be Dalca, from another plane, who knows how far his reach goes, we already know the senator hated us and he kept trying to find ways to bury our kind. Maybe he’s found a way.’
‘That sounds insane.’
‘I agree. But we have to be prepared for the possibility.’
He stepped back shaking his head.
‘What else could it be?’ He asked finally, continuing our steady pace back to my building. ‘We have to be as objective as possible.’
‘I know that. I’ve also looked into other possibilities, none of which seem plausible to me.’
‘Such as?’
‘Collectors, working as a unit, combined abilities.’
‘Why couldn’t that be an option?’
‘Because it isn’t.’ I said flatly, glancing at him. ‘No one can be that powerful and aside from me and Dalca, only the Beings can do these things.’
‘And it’s obviously not Aaryon or Solaris.’
‘No.’
‘I mean they could have decided they’ve had enough of us and just came to systematically kill us all.’
Laughing at his absurd theory, I shook my head. ‘No, they can’t physically set foot here, they’re linked to their realm, they’re light and energy. They’d need a physical vessel to exist here.’
‘Wow.’
‘Yeah.’ I sped up our pace. ‘Can’t imagine how that would go down, some giant ball of light coming to visit Earth.’
‘Imagine the chaos.’
‘Like Roswell, but bigger.’
He chuckled.
‘We should get back. I need to prepare for tomorrow, and I need to pack.’
‘What do we do in the meantime?’
‘We keep working on the case. There are more than seventeen reported Sensitive and Collector deaths. And if we go by the creep who took Illarion, we know they’re after those codes.’
‘Which has something to do with the Legion, I’m betting.’
‘Whatever that is,’ I muttered. ‘Keep looking into it.’
‘Will do.’
‘The codes obviously have something to do with it, so keep your focus on whatever information was found at Dalca’s house, see if Daniel can dig any of that stuff up for you, and I know Josh had a huge back up of it all as well.’
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