This time he turned his attention to me.
‘Yes.’ I said, I did remember. I could never forget. ‘I told you that she was destined for great things.’
‘And she was.’
Clearing my throat, I replaced the drink on the table. The choice of past tense shook me. ‘She’s fighting a battle inside her head, you know it, you’ve seen it.’ I began. ‘But you have to see that it’s not psychosis. She’s not going crazy.’
He ran a hand over his beard and bowed his head. ‘When we lost Ace, and they told you she was pregnant…’
A pang of pain made me flinch.
‘I swear to you, if I knew without a doubt, I would have stopped her, I just, I couldn’t see it, her aura was interfering with what I can usually see…’
Painfully aware of the tears wetting my eyes, I looked up at him. He thought that everything was finally catching up with her. I shook my head.
‘Not a day goes by where I don’t regret it, Christ, you have to believe me. If I knew…’
‘This isn’t on you, it never was.’
‘I’ve carried this guilt for a long time,’ he confessed. ‘And then when we found out Anna was pregnant; I knew you’d stopped coming around because it was too hard. I saw it in Ace’s eyes, when we told you.’
‘I know you think she’s losing her mind. I would too, had it been anyone else. But I know her. That’s not what this is. That dream, it was real.’ I wet my lips and let out a breath.
‘Illarion, you need to open your mind, push down those walls you’ve put up and see this for what it is.’
‘I came here to ask for your help, what we’re going into is big, we need everyone on our side.’
‘And I am, you know I am. Project Adam is looming over us all.’
‘Not only that.’
He inhaled sharply and then looked down again, eventually he swung his eyes back to mine, lost for words. He opened and then closed his mouth.
‘I know you don’t believe it. But she needs us, she needs her friends on her side.’ I said again.
‘I’m always on your side, and hers, but this is crazy, you know I’d follow you two through anything. But where is the proof? We can’t just go on—’
‘On what?’ I asked, swinging my eyes up to his. ‘On her word?’
He looked away.
‘She believes he’s back.’
‘And I can see that you do too.’ He knotted his brows. ‘With no evidence.’
‘We’ve gone into more, with a lot less.’
‘This is different, Brother.’
‘No, it isn’t.’
‘This time it’s all of us, Illarion. We’re all at risk, and this isn’t the time to entertain supernatural theories.’
‘Supernatural theories?’ My voice rose. ‘Do you even hear yourself? We are supernatural, all of us.’
He shut his mouth.
‘If anyone should be open to believing, it’s you. Did you forget that she got you out of that burring building? Or that she slowed time to save your life at the risk of her own?’
Aurel opened his mouth to protest but I’d seen and heard enough. It was solidified in his mind.
He didn’t believe me, he didn’t want to see what was right in front of him and that made him dangerous to us. I took a swing of the corona and wet my lips, contemplating the next choice of words.
But as the truth, in the form of my oldest friend, stared me in the face, I knew this was it.
‘Illarion—’
‘Save it.’ I stood, firmly placing the drink back on the table. ‘Thanks for the talk.’
Before he could say another word, I pushed away from the couch. What good would it do trying to argue a point with someone whose mind was already made up?
I turned and left, closing the door and any hope of convincing him.
So that was it. Us against them. Not the enemy, but our friends.
Chapter Twenty-Two
Ace
We had both decided that being cooped up inside was doing me no favors and Alex, as patient as he was, was starting to get cabin fever too.
He was rambling on about something that had totally gone over my head when a feeling of dread chased away everything he was saying.
‘What is it?’ Alex stopped walking when I did.
We’d been circling the grounds for more than an hour.
‘Hey? You with me?’
‘Something’s going on in New York.’
‘What?’
‘Not sure. Illarion’s shaken, can’t quite get a read on it.’
‘The connection thing is handy, huh?’
‘Sometimes,’ I mused. ‘Right now, it’s a pain in the ass. It’s not giving me much to go on. But he’s worried.’
I reached for my phone and he gently cupped his hand over mine.
‘We can’t.’ He said quietly. ‘We don’t know if he’s been tapped. It’s too risky.’
‘So what, I just wait?’
‘I’ll get my contact to check.’ He explained. ‘We need to be careful here, getting you exposed right now is a mistake until we know what we’re dealing with.’
‘I don’t have time for this.’ I muttered. There was too much unknown right now, whatever Illarion was going through had me on edge.
‘Listen to me, Ace. Please.’
I stopped, dropping my hand.
‘My contact will check up on him. I give you my word. Just let me do this before we jump into anything.’
‘Okay.’ I conceded. ‘But if I’m not satisfied with the answer, I’m doing it my way.’
‘Deal.’
***
Illarion
The walk back to my car was hellish, thoughts kept running through my head, what if we were alone, what if everything we were about to face came at the cost of losing friends? Maybe I’d already lost them…maybe what was coming was a warning, to show us what weakness lay just under the surface ready to break already fractured relationships.
And then I made it worse by bringing my thoughts to the FBI team, would they side with Aurel? He could be convincing? But Peyton was already sided with Ace for her own reasons, maybe she’d be harder to turn, but the others, aside from Matt…
I stopped myself. I couldn’t do this.
Aurel was an idiot to be so closed minded, he’d seen as much as the rest of us had, hell, he was the one who’d seen Ace at her worst after we came back together. How could it end like this?
He needed to see the truth, but his truth was going to be compromised now, Anna and Lucy were in the picture, whatever risks came up, he would look at them in a different light now, I could understand that. But it didn’t make it easier to accept and I’d be damned if I accepted his disapproval.
Even before Ace left, he’d been warning me that he thought she needed help, that no matter how much she was coping, she couldn’t be fine. I, however told him that I was with her, helping in whatever way I knew possible and yes, I’d been angry at myself every step of the way for not being able to offer her professional help. The Agency was compromised, we’d all been targeted and blinded by Dalca and Donna. He knew that, Christ. I ran my hand through my hair and sat in the car, staring at the dash.
But I didn’t see her suffering, did I? She’d been on her own long before she left New York because that’s what she’d decided. Maybe I was blind, maybe Aurel was right.
How did I approach this? How was I supposed to go back to my house, call Ace and tell her to stay away because if she came back now, she’d be targeted and possibly subjected to treatment.
Treatment in our world consisted of institutionalization, regular sedation with the Serum and counselling. My skin crawled. There was no way I’d let them do that to her. She’d been through enough at the hands of men and women we trusted to let the good people do that to her too.
I turned the car on and pulled out into the street, one way or another, I had to get to her, I had to see her again, whether I risked my position at the Agency or not.
Chapter Twenty-Three
Ace
My eyes shot open as a breath was trapped in my lungs and sweat beaded all over my body. I clutched the collar around my shirt and frantically searched the dark room. Empty.
But someone had been here. I’d felt it. I gripped the sheets against my chest and forced my breathing to steady and then slowly swept my eyes around the darkness surrounding me. It was too still. Nothing moved.
A cold breath formed and escaped, it too floated around me, caught in this loop of time and stagnate air reminding me that I was alone and everything was still.
But someone had been here. I wasn’t crazy. I knew what I felt, and I’d heard it too. There was whispering, deep and low, far too quiet for me to make anything out. But it had been there. And then it came through as a rough reminder of what I was doing here, a proverbial slap to the face that left a mean sting.
The whispering in my ear intensified, tormenting me when I was already on the verge of falling. I grit my teeth as the words became clearer.
He wasn’t really here. He was just in my head, I told myself, to no avail. I tried my best to focus on grounding myself and regaining some semblance of control. Alex was in the next room, his sister too, I was safe…
“You’re going to be safe when this is over…”
‘Go away,’ I pleaded into the dark, empty room.
Was I losing it?
Was this what Aurel said was happening?
I squeezed my eyes shut and started telling myself that it was just a dream, just paranoia. I was safe.
When that didn’t help, I tried the only other thing I knew worked, I dug my nails into my arm.
I’d used this technique when my nightmares became too real and threat of crossing realms became imminent. Anything physical to remind myself of what was real. Now more than ever, I couldn’t let my mind wander.
“Now, now, no need to hurt yourself.”
‘Please go away.’
“I’m afraid I can’t do that, you and I have work to do.”
I swallowed back the tears and pressed harder until I drew blood.
He wasn’t real, he couldn’t be, I killed him. I saw him die, I felt his life fading.
But an insidious voice whispered otherwise. His voice.
He’d waited, hiding in the shadows in the darkest recesses of my mind, biding his time and now the time had come, it wasn’t enough for him to find me in my dreams, he was crossing over, he was growing stronger.
It hit me hard and I felt it all at once.
“You need me to win. And I need you to ensure we continue living.”
‘You’re not living.’ I whispered pathetically.
“You’re not wrong there, pet, but I need you to keep going here, on Earth. We need each other, and you’re no use to me or our people dead.”
Whatever I’d been keeping down and keeping a lid on, was starting to bubble and threatening to erupt. He knew it, he knew what I’d do and that is why he was here.
I grit my teeth. I wouldn’t let him win. I shook my head, pressing my palms over my ears. It couldn’t be real…he couldn’t be here.
“Don’t start to doubt yourself now. You’ve done so well to get strong. Now, when we meet again, we can finally do what we set out to do.”
I dug my nails deeper, hissing at the sting.
“Come now, Acacia. Don’t be reckless. Let go of your arm, you’ll bleed out like that.”
Before I could react, a strong hand tightened around my wrist and forced my fingers away from my arm.
Jerking back, I scrambled out of the bed and dropped to the ground. Oh dear God this can’t be happening.
“Good. Now wake up and clean yourself up. You’re losing a lot of blood.”
My eyes searched the room frantically, no one, there was no one.
“When you wake up, start using your Darkness, I know you’ve been afraid of it. But you’ll need it to cross planes. This won’t work until you can do that.”
Panic rocked my reality, I was awake, I had to be, I, I was on the floor in my room, but I couldn’t shake it, he was here, right here but there was no one…
“Now, wake up.”
‘Ace!’ Alex’s voice broke through the chaos and somehow, he was here, right by my side, pulling me up into his arms.
‘Look at me! Ace, look at me!’
Before I could move away, a strong hand wrapped around my wrist, pulling it free from my arm.
‘Ace, stop.’ He said firmly. ‘Stop, let go.’
Shaking my head, I struggled against his hold.
‘Ace,’ he breathed heavily against my ear. ‘You need to let go, you’re hurting yourself.’
My eyes shot open and landed on Alex.
‘Oh, God, oh Alex, I’m, I don’t know what happened.’
His hot breath grounded me, but the tears came fiercely, I couldn’t breathe through the suffocating fear and I couldn’t see through the haze of tears. But his hold tightened, reminding me of the last time I held him, the last time before we went out on what would be our last mission.
A broken sob escaped my lips as I reluctantly fell into his arms and pulled him tightly against me.
‘It’s okay, Ace. Come on, breathe and relax. You’re okay.’
He coaxed my arm free, pulling it toward him. I tensed when he wrapped a towel around my arm, securing it with a knot all while his hands shook holding onto me.
‘I’m losing it. I’m going crazy, he’s going to kill me.’
He tipped my chin up, his eyes meeting mine.
‘What happened? Who? Who’s going to kill you?’
‘He’s everywhere, Alex.’ I breathed, hating how my voice shook. ‘Everywhere I go.’
‘Who is?’ He asked, cupping my cheek.
‘Dalca.’
His brows creased. ‘What do you mean, Ace?’
‘I don’t, I don’t know.’
‘Talk to me, what did you see?’
‘I’ve been seeing him, hearing him for weeks.’ I trembled. ‘It’s like he’s really here.’
‘Like your dream yesterday?’
‘No.’ I shook. ‘Here, he’s here, not just in my dreams.’
His eyes darkened and his hold on me tightened.
‘There’s no one here, Ace.’
‘I know that.’ I spat. ‘I can see that.’
‘Okay, easy.’
‘I’m not crazy. I swear to you.’
‘I know.’ He squeezed my shoulder. ‘I believe you.’
A silent moment of apprehension passed.
‘We need to get this dressed properly.’
He helped me up, first to my feet and then to walk. Whatever Dalca was doing to me, was draining me. Not only was I losing comprehension of my reality, I was losing my physical strength too and then, it dawned on me.
A slow and shallow breath stalled on my lips.
‘Ace?’
‘I think I know what’s happening.’
Alex knelt, setting down the first aid kit.
‘Talk to me.’
‘Dalca is taking over from within.’
‘How?’
He averted his gaze for a moment to clean my arm and wrap it up. Once the bandage was secured with a strip of tape, he looked at me again.
He gently grazed his fingertips over my cheek then moved back.
‘This weapon, Project Adam…it’s coded to me, my genetic makeup, but Dalca is the same. Only together, we create the complete Divine—’
‘Balance.’ Alex supplied. ‘Right.’
‘Exactly, and, and I think he’s trying to combine our essence, to get that balance, with that balance we can fight.’
‘But that wouldn’t explain eradicating the code.’
‘No, but it would bide time.’
‘How?’
‘With the balanced code, it wouldn’t match what they have now.’
His eyes lit up. ‘So it wouldn’t work?’
‘No, no I don’t think so. I mean
after it may, once they update the coding. But that would mean they’d need my blood again which would be an impossibility if Dalca and I were powering this body. No one would be able to get close enough.’
‘This is a big call, Ace.’
‘I know it is.’ I admitted. ‘But I think that’s what this is.’
‘Okay.’ He ran a hand over his jaw. ‘What does it mean for you?’
‘He said something about needing me to be able to cross planes, I can’t do that yet, I haven’t been able to do more than a few dream walks.’
‘And he wants you to get good at it?’
‘I think whatever comes, that’ll be the key.’
‘How do you get good at something like that?’
‘I don’t know yet.’
Fresh tears began to form and cling heavily to my lashes.
‘If this is the only way to end this, Alex I don’t think I can do it.’
‘We’ll get more information, we’ll do research. We’ll work this out.’ He said quietly and before he could wrap his arms around me, I pulled free.
‘Don’t patronize me. Please.’
He stilled.
‘Whatever you’re about to say, don’t.’ I muttered. ‘I don’t need you to tell me I’m losing it.’
‘That’s not what I was going to say.’ He reached for me and I let him. ‘I thought you knew me better than that.’
My shoulders sagged and when I didn’t say anything, his head tipped to the side.
‘How can you think that?’ He didn’t hide the hurt in his eyes. ‘I’ve known you since the beginning, I know who you are. I know you don’t bullshit.’
A nasty feeling of guilt crept up on me.
‘I don’t know what’s wrong with me.’
‘You’re exhausted.’ He brought my arms down gently. ‘And whatever he’s doing to you, it’s affecting you but you’re not alone in this. I mean it.’
‘You believe me?’
‘Of course, I do. When have you ever given me reason not to?’
Pulling back, I smiled. He was right. Never, in the entire time we’d known each other did he try to discount me or what I was saying, not even when it was going against our general or orders. He was always by my side, always all in. My heart expanded and I let him in.
For a silent moment, we stood unbearably close, dangerously still and achingly helpless.
Jack of Hart- Wild Card Page 30