by Tara Brent
It wasn’t a hard decision at all picking this over dinner that would have my anxiety hit the roof. We would have a family dinner Christmas Day and that would be enough.
Many people would say hiding out while my family is having dinner together is wrong, that I don’t value family time but that’s not the case. Despite how different my sister and I are and how much she breakdances on my last nerve, no one will ever defend her faster than me.
The same goes for Steve, Damon, and my parents as well no matter how mad they have been with me for not joining the family business, I will always be there for them. But they do drive me crazy at times. So, for my peace of mind, I keep to myself as much as I can.
The front door opened and I looked over my shoulder as Steve entered and began removing his jacket and scarf, “Thanks for bailing on dinner.”
“You’re welcome.”
I’ve never seen a man look so good in a turtle neck sweater and jeans. He sat down beside me and reclined with his legs outstretched and crossed at the ankles.
“Did I miss out on a fight?”
He shook his head, “No. It was just really awkward. Diamond is a talker.”
I knew it, I said to myself and took another sip of my hot chocolate, “William sure knows how to pick them.”
We lapsed into a comfortable silence, both occupied with our own thoughts. When we had dated this was something we did each time we visited the cabin, whether it be during the winter or summer this was our favorite spot to sit in silence and think.
“I miss doing this with you.”
I turned to look at him but he was still staring at the dancing flames, “Yeah.”
He looked at me then, surprised at my easy admittance, “Really now?”
I shrugged, “Yeah, this was something good that happened between us. Why wouldn’t I miss it even a little?”
"A lot of good happened between us, Trish. We just ended up having to take different roads in life."
I inhaled and sighed deeply, this wasn’t a conversation I wanted to have, “Okay.”
He kept staring at me and to hide my discomfort I took a sip of my hot chocolate that was no longer hot.
“What I said to you, last Christmas-”
“Just don’t.” I cut him off.
He licked his lips and turned his body to face me, “I didn’t mean to disrespect you Trish, I just - our breakup wasn’t easy for me.”
I raised a brow before they knitted tightly, “You were caught with a different woman every week. I’d say you handled our breakup pretty well.”
“I was trying to replace you.”
My face scrunched up with confusion and I turned to look at him, I couldn’t tell if he was trying to get me angry or not, “What?”
He closed his eyes for a moment and when they reopened there was something there that I had only seen when we dated, vulnerability, "I meant, I wanted you but we couldn't be together. I was inheriting a company and you were leaving to get your Ph.D. literally on the other side of the planet and I wasn't sure you'd be coming back. I was dealing with missing you the only way I knew how. And that was by trying to find someone like you all the time."
“That’s stupid. There’s no one else like me.”
His lips curved to form a smile, “I know that and I should have known it then.”
After last year's incident at the Christmas party, Steve and I didn't speak to each other for months. Once I finally moved back to start working here I had ignored his calls and messages because I was still mad at him for thinking I would be one of those women he’d call whenever he wanted a night of sex. I had been crushed that that was what he thought of me. I wasn't and still, am not that type of girl.
I hadn’t expected our relationship to resume with my return, not at all and I wasn’t interested in being friends with benefits with anyone and most of all with Steve.
He reached out and touched my hair and I grew tense, “Does my touch really repulse you this much?” He whispered, his breath fanning my face.
I looked up at him and shook my head. His touch didn’t repulse me, his touch made me yearn for more and so I did nothing to stop him when he brushed his thumb across my chin or when he pulled closer to me or when his hand brushed through my hair as he lowered his head to mine and kissed me.
Chapter Four
His lips glided over mine and a chill instantly went down my spine. His hand released my hair to cup my cheek while his other hand held onto my waist and pulled me closer.
The fireplace was no longer warming my body because Steve was now my source of heat as his hand slid under my top to gently caress my flesh with his thumb. I couldn't stop the contented sigh that escaped from me and I pulled his bottom lip into my mouth, sucking it slowly.
His hold on my waist grew tight and he lifted me up and placed me onto his lap to straddle him. I could feel his growing erection at my core as I adjusted myself and wrapped my hands around his neck, pressing myself to him as our kiss deepened.
Stop. Stop now!
I could hear the little woman inside my head yelling at me but I was quickly losing myself over to the feeling building at the pit of my gut. I wanted this. I had forgotten just how amazing Steve’s lips felt, how his hand felt on my skin and how much a single kiss can lead to hours of intense lovemaking.
I hadn’t been touched like this since our relationship ended and that was a long – long time ago. At first, it had been hard and then it didn't matter anymore but now as I grinded against his cock between my legs and our lips tore apart as my head fell backward, feeling him inside was all I could think about right now.
His hands circled me to my ass where he grabbed and squeezed my ass cheeks painfully, making me gasp.
My eyes found his as I licked my lips and his dark eyes wandered to my mouth, "So fucking sexy...”
A smirk lifted the side of my mouth as his sexy baritone voice sent chills down my spine. He squeezed my ass again, harder than before and I sucked my bottom lip into my mouth and bit down as I fisted the plush cushion behind him.
His mouth latched onto my neck, sucking hard and my hand slid between us to unzip his pants and grasp his dick. His mouth vibrated against my skin as he groaned and arched his pelvis upwards, wanting more of my touch.
"Don't, fucking tease me, Trish."
"Or what?" I asked breathlessly and he pulled away from my neck. He stared down at me, his eyes darkened with lust. The look on his face was exciting to me but it might have scared someone else because he looked angry.
I was suddenly lifted and I landed on the sofa with an oomph and he positioned himself between my legs, pinning me down. He grinded himself into me and I arched off the sofa, wanting to feel more of him through my sweatpants.
My body was burning from the inside out with my growing need and he must have seen it in my eyes because the next second he was yanking my pants down and throwing it them the ground.
He placed a kiss beside my navel and then on the other side and my lower half tightened. His mixture of aggression and gentleness had me on edge not knowing what he’d do next. I closed my eyes as he blew into my navel while his hands ran up and down my thighs, squeezing them tightly before moving upwards to hold my waist.
I looked down at him and his dark brown almost black eyes met mine as he pressed his nose to my core. I swallowed hard, my pulse quickening at the intimate act as he inhaled.
"Steve," I whispered. My voice soft and shaky and I gasped as he kissed me through my panties.
“Shh, let me taste you.”
His words weren’t helping to calm me. I felt like I was going to climax there and I made the mistake of trying to close my legs.
He released my waist to hold me behind my ankles, pushing them up and open before letting me go to rip my underwear from my body. I couldn’t stop the scream that left my lips at the tearing fabric.
“Fuck.” I breathed out and his eyes twinkled as he stared down at my naked bottom half.
He pressed a
thumb to my clit and I bit down on my lip to stop myself from making another sound. Goosebumps sprouted across my flesh as he licked his finger before continuing to rub my swollen bundle of nerves. He slid his finger further down to open my folds and my lips parted a fraction and I suddenly forgot how to breathe through my nostrils.
My chest rose and fell with shallow breathes and I felt my juices leave my body as if being commanded to by him. He rubbed his fingers all over my pussy, spreading my juices and I started to whimper.
His eyes held my stare as his head dipped and I moaned loudly as his mouth latched onto my clit. He sucked me into his mouth hard, almost painfully but the pleasure that blossomed within my body had me arching completely off the sofa.
His hands returned to my waist, keeping me still as he began to kiss and suck at my most sensitive area. Stars danced before my eyes as he tortured me with his tongue my fingers dived into his hair as I rotated my hips, grinding my pussy against his lips.
“Oh fuck. Right there, yes – right there.”
He reached down and grabbed his cock, an animalistic growl vibrating his chest while he slid a finger inside me. I clenched around him and he forced another finger inside me and he continued to lick my clit.
I could feel it, my climax rushing towards me on a wave I knew I wouldn't be able to handle. I started to pull away, dragging myself backward and away from him but his fingers only dug into my waist, pinning me to where I was.
He held his head up but his fingers were still inside me, pumping and flicking in a come-hither motion, calling my climax forward. I shook my head, “Please, no. Please.”
He licked his lips, cleaning them of my juices and I moaned loudly as he began to force a third finger inside me. I screamed and called his name, my body stretching from the intrusion but I held his stare, trapped within his dark eyes.
"Come for me," he demanded, his voice deep but smooth as he began to pump his fingers harder, rubbing at my g-spot. He leaned over me and kissed me, "Do you taste yourself?"
I couldn’t answer, I couldn’t think. What was this man doing to me?
My climax hit and I screamed, loud and hard as my entire body shook beneath him. He captured my mouth with his, his tongue searching every corner of my mouth. He pulled his fingers out of me as I began to come down from the clouds and he freed his cock from the confinements of his jeans.
Okay, that I had missed, I thought to myself as I looked down between us at his thick length. His face was inches away from mine, watching me as he began to stroke himself and my tongue darted out to wet my lips.
He exhaled heavily, “Always teasing.”
I reached down and wrapped my fingers around his bulging member, my breathing increasing again at how hard he was yet soft beneath my touch. I had forgotten this, the euphoric high from the anticipation of being taken by him. I stroked him, my eyes flicking up to his as I did so. I could see the uncensored need in his eyes that I knew matched my own and I guided his head with my free hand to my neck, urging him to kiss me there.
I could hear the voice in my mind, begging me to stop but I tuned her out as I began to pump his length. He bucked forward, pressing his face into the crook of my neck and fisted his hand into my hair as the other cupped one of my breasts.
He kneaded the soft flesh and I rubbed my thumb over the tip of his dick before positioning him at my entrance. My own eyes fluttered closed and he rocked back and forth as I rubbed him against my aching entrance. I was dripping wet, my body burning painfully to feel him inside me, consequences be damned.
He released my breast to take a hold of his cock, circling the angry tip around my clit before sliding down to my opening.
He sank into me with one stroke as his teeth sank into my shoulder and my breath hitched from the pain. Mind-numbing pleasure and pain blossomed in the lower half of my body and raised my body as he sank deeper and deeper, stretching me to his size.
I wiggled beneath him, my body burning as it tried to adjust to him and he captured my lips as I started to whimper. What was I doing, I asked myself, why was I doing this, why does it feel so good?
He pulled out of me to his tip and then pounded himself into me again. I clawed at his back as I screamed, pulling on his sweater as I arched off the sofa, meeting his thrust and he began to pick up the pace.
His hand cupped my cheek as the other held one of my thighs, forcing me open as he began to lose himself inside me. Our groans and moans and heavy pants mixed with the sound of the crackling fire were only adding to our hunger, our need to be consumed by each other.
“Aunty Tish!”
We froze as Nathan called outside the door.
“Shit.” I cursed as I shoved Steve off me and he dived for my pants. I quickly pulled them on, the both of us rushing to get dressed as Nathan knocked and called again. I looked over my shoulder when I finally made it to the door to check if Steve was decent before opening it.
"Hey, little prince." I grinned and then frowned, "Nathan, again without the jacket?”
I scooped him up into my arms, my eyes darting around before taking him inside and sitting down with him by the fire. His little body was shivering and Steve went to the kitchenette to fix him some hot chocolate.
“You need to stop doing that. I don’t want you getting a cold.”
“S-S-Sorry aunty, I just wanted to see you.”
My face softened, “That’s okay just promise not to do it again.”
“I pomise.”
I shook my head at his mispronunciation and Steve walked over to us with a cup and a blanket, “Hey Lil man." He greeted Nathan who happily took the cup of hot chocolate. He then stooped down beside us and ruffled Nathan's hair but as his eyes wandered to mine I looked away.
What have I done?
“What are you doing?” Nathan asked after taking a sip.
“Oh, ah, w-we were just hanging out. Adults do that too sometimes.” I stuttered.
Steve lowered himself to the floor, "That's right. We like to hang out," his eyes flicked to mine, "and play with each other."
I cleared my throat loudly, got up and took the cup from Nathan, “Alright, let’s get you back to your parents. They’re probably looking for you.”
Nathan pouted but got to his little feet, “Can’t we stay a little longer?”
“It’s late buddy, it's past your bedtime."
He sighed and hung his head and Steve grinned, “He definitely has you wrapped around his finger.”
“We’ll come back during the day tomorrow, deal?”
“Deal!” Nathan screamed and dashed for the door, his little legs moving faster than I thought they’d be able to.
"Goodnight," Steve said once we were bundled up to leave and he was still sitting on the ground, his face void of emotion.
"Goodnight," I said under my breath, slamming the door closed behind me.
Chapter Five
It had taken me hours to fall asleep. I had twisted and turned, scrolled through my social media, read a few chapters from a book, stared out my window at the falling snow and even went downstairs to make tea. All in hopes that my eyes would become tired and I’d be able to fall asleep.
Well, jokes on me because it all backfired. My eyes did indeed become tired, painfully so but my mind was still energized and set on torturing me with replays of what had happened between Steve and I. Every time I closed my eyes I saw him between my legs, kissing my stomach or his hands caressing my thighs.
“What have I done?” I had asked that question repeatedly throughout the night because I was literally now Steve’s friend with benefits. The one thing I had been so against.
Finally, I had managed to fall asleep but now here I am, already awake at 6am. I dragged myself to the bathroom, had a long hot shower and then dragged myself downstairs. I rummaged through the fridge like a starving raccoon and found leftovers that improved my mood just a bit.
The warm glow from the early morning sun kissed my skin through the window and I closed my
eyes, standing completely still to absorb the light. When I opened my eyes they landed on the lake house, the scene of last night’s crime and my mood continued to plummet.
“Fuck.” I bristled and turned my back but came face to face with the last person I wanted to see. Fuck.
Steve was leaning against the counter with his legs crossed at the ankle and his arms crossed over his chest. His face was set in stone and his eyes just as cold as he stared at me, “Good morning.”
"Morning," I grumbled and walked past him. I wanted to ask what was so good about the morning but bit down on my tongue. The less I said hopefully meant the less he'd say.
“How’d you sleep?” He asked without turning to me.
With his back facing me I was able to stare daggers at him before placing my dishes in the dishwasher, “Like a baby.”
Biting my tongue yet again I closed the dishwasher and got a refill of coffee. What I’d give to get a call right now, saying that I need to come in for work, I thought.
A chainsaw wouldn’t be strong enough to cut the tension in the room as he turned, sat down and leaned forward to cross his arms on the island’s surface, “Trish we need to talk about what happened last night.”
“There’s nothing to talk about.”
“Is that so?”
“Yes.”
He leaned back, “I’m not sorry.”
Looking up from my cup I grinded my teeth together and placed the cup onto the island. His hair was ruffled, with strands brushing against his forehead, his lips were plump and red as if he had chewed on them repeatedly and he had bags under his eyes.
It seems like someone didn't sleep well either, I said to myself but it didn't really give me any comfort. I wanted to feel shame and guilt about last night but I didn’t feel any of that and that’s why I was so pissed. What had happened had felt so good and I had wanted it, god knows I had wanted it but I couldn’t let Steve know that. I had opened a can of worms that I wasn’t sure how to close.