Eternal Beloved

by Bella Abbott

  The girls left me alone until about an hour before I was to meet Jared, and then descended on the room like a flock of agitated birds to offer counsel on fragrances, outfits, and makeup. Sarah seemed horrified when I told her I only used lip gloss, and insisted I allow her to do a makeover on me, or at least a quick attempt. When she finished, I inspected her work in the mirror and grimaced.

  “I’m not sure teen hooker is the look I’m after,” I said.

  “You look seductive. Nothing wrong with that,” she said.

  “Don’t take this the wrong way, but I think I’ll stick with what I’m used to,” I replied. The eyeliner and heavy-handed blush made me look like a cartoon. “He’s already met me as me, so I don’t think there’s any point in pretending to be something I’m not.”

  “You need to kick it up a notch, girl,” Sarah assured me. “It’s not pretending, it’s showing you’re interested.”

  I frowned. “This is more than a notch. He’ll be asking what porn film I’m appearing in if I meet him like this.”

  “Not such a bad thing. You can put it on the internet and make millions,” Kate piped up.

  I shooed them away and rinsed the makeup off, and tried on one of the two flowery summer dresses I owned. When I exited the bathroom wearing that and my Docs, the girls inspected me with varying degrees of incredulity, which I ignored.

  “See you guys later,” I said, and tossed Jared’s jacket over my shoulder and headed for the door.

  Sarah called after me, “I want video.”

  I breathed a sigh of relief as I took the stairs to the ground floor two at a time. I liked all three of my roommates, but times like today strained my patience. What I’d really wanted was to be left alone so I could collect my thoughts in peace, but I couldn’t act like a diva throwing a tantrum, so instead I’d done my best to suck it up. Still, it was nice to be on my own for at least a little while, and I took my time making it to the guard gate, twilight’s ochre glow now gone from the sky.

  Cliff was on duty, protecting the drive from trespassers while listening to a game on a portable radio. He gave me a wave with hardly a glance, and I continued to the road. A look at my watch told me I was a few minutes early, and I stood near the bus stop, fingering my hair.

  Headlights bounced down the road toward me, accompanied by the high revving whine of an engine. A vintage black Porsche 911 convertible screeched to a stop by the bus stop, and Jared grinned from the driver’s seat.

  “Hope you weren’t waiting long,” he called to me. “Hop in.”

  I did as requested and fastened my seatbelt. He waited until I’d secured it and then took off with a spray of gravel from the rear wheels, taking obvious joy in racing through the gears, hands wrapped in leather driving gloves working the shifter and gripping the wheel. He glanced over at me on a straightaway and smiled.

  “Nice car,” I said.

  “Thanks. It’s an ’86. Air cooled. I modified it so it’s nearly as quick as a turbo from the same vintage.”

  I made some appreciative noises as if I’d understood any of that. “Where are we going?”

  “To the coast again.”

  “Same restaurant?”

  He grinned mischievously. “No.”

  The road noise and the motor’s roar made any more meaningful conversation impossible, so I sat back as Jared guided his German land rocket around the bends at frightening speeds, grateful for the wind screen behind our seats that kept most of the wind from buffeting the cockpit.

  I looked over at the speedometer. “Are we really doing a hundred?”

  “That’s what this car was built for. Rock solid up to its top speed.”

  “Which is?”

  “A hundred and fifty.”

  “What’s the fastest you’ve had it?”

  He smirked. “I’ve hit that a couple of times.”

  “Aren’t you worried about police?”

  He shook his head and tapped a gizmo mounted to the dash. “Radar detector will let me know if I’m in trouble.”

  Half an hour later we came over a hill, and there was the bay and the ocean beyond, a yellow crescent moon spangling the water with gold. Jared slowed to something resembling a reasonable speed and downshifted as we neared the water. He turned off the main road, and the low coupe growled its way toward a marina at the edge of the bay.

  He rolled to a halt, shut the engine off, and smiled in the dark. My face was tingling from the chill of the air from the drive, but I realized it was surprisingly warm now that we’d stopped.

  “We’re here,” he said, and I thought I heard a hint of excitement in his voice. I pulled the door latch and swung my bare legs from the car, glad it wasn’t cold, given my choice of outfits. Jared waited until I was out and then closed the convertible top. Once the windows were up, he locked the car and surprised me by rounding the front and taking my hand.

  A sensation like a strong electric current surged up my arm, and my breath caught in my throat. If Jared noticed, he didn’t give any indication.

  “You have to watch your step here,” he explained. “It’s kind of terrible until we get to the docks…and then it gets worse.”

  I mumbled something unintelligible and tried to slow my trip-hammering heart. I hoisted Jared’s jacket and we picked our way across cracked pavement and then along a rocky path that led to a rusting gate that protected the docks. He pushed it open, and it gave way with a creak. Jared guided me along the wooden dock, which shifted slightly as we walked. His gloved hand tightened on mine to steady me, and I was glad he was there, given the wobbling of the walkway. Unless it’s my pulse doing that.

  “We’re going to the one on the end,” he said, his voice more melodic now that he wasn’t yelling over the motor. I shivered at how confident he was as he led me to where a sailboat waited, its lines groaning in the mild surge. When we reached it, he stepped to the edge of the dock and helped me on board, and then hopped onto the deck with a chuckle. “Welcome aboard the Midnight Runner.”

  “Is it yours?” I asked. A limo, a car, a helicopter…and a boat? Where’s his spaceship?

  He shook his head. “A friend’s. He lets me use it whenever I’m up this way. I love to single hand it for trips on the bay. It’s the perfect size for me – a Catalina 34.”

  “Sounds like you have some great friends.”

  “Especially the ones with boats,” he agreed, and motioned to the narrow opening that led into the cabin. “There’s a basket down there with too much food and a bunch of drinks. I thought it would be fun to go for a night cruise around the bay. I love being on the water when there’s nobody else around.”

  I must have looked worried, because he took a step closer. “What is it?”

  “I…I don’t know if I get seasick or not. I’ve never been on a boat before,” I confessed.

  He looked out over the bay. “It’s pretty flat tonight. You shouldn’t have a problem.”

  “I hope not.”

  “Only one way to find out.” He walked forward and checked some lines, patted a windlass, and then glanced around a final time. “I’m going to cast off. You can hang out back here on the benches, or below. Whatever you feel comfortable with.”

  I opted for one of the benches to the side of the wheel and watched as Jared moved around the boat with expert hands, checking lines and eyeing the mast before going below. Lights flickered on, and then a diesel engine coughed to life. He returned after a few moments and grinned at me, and then hopped from the vessel and moved to the bow line.

  Once the boat was free of the dock, he maneuvered the wheel and throttle until we exited the mouth of the marina. He looked to me and slid from behind the wheel.

  “Will you steer? I need to raise the sails.”

  I blanched. “You want me to drive this thing?”

  “Please.”

  “I don’t know how.”

  His expression turned somber. “There are two important rules to remember: don’t hit anything, and don’t ru
n aground – which technically is hitting land, so sort of the same as the first.” He paused, seeing my discomfort. “Seriously, it’s easy. Just hold the wheel straight. I won’t be more than a minute.”

  “What if you fall in or something?”

  “That would be a good time to circle around,” he said, and laughed. “Don’t worry. I won’t.”

  He moved aside and I slipped behind the wheel. My hands were sweating on the steel rim as I watched him make his way to the bow, bring a line back, and wrap it several times around a windlass.

  “How are we going to sail if there’s no wind?” I asked. The water was like glass, and as far as I could tell, there was no breeze.

  “Don’t worry. There will be. I know the bay. Once we make it another couple of hundred yards, it’ll pick up. You’ll see.”

  He raised the sails and resumed his position behind the wheel. Three minutes later, a mild wind began wrinkling the surface, and shortly thereafter he shut off the motor and we were moving along at jogging speed, the sails full.

  I eyed him with admiration. “You really do know the bay, don’t you?”

  He shrugged. “Sometimes you get lucky.” He looked into the amber glow of the cabin. “Hold onto the wheel again for a moment and I’ll bring the goodies up.”

  I did as he asked, a bit less nervously this time, and when he reappeared, he was holding an oversized picnic basket in one hand. He set it on the bench beside me and gazed over the bow.

  “See? You’re doing awesome. A natural.”

  I felt the color rise in my face and tried unsuccessfully to restrain the smile that pulled at my lips. I snuck a look at him standing with his chest out, holding a rope with a gloved hand like a Caribbean pirate, and my heart fluttered. Everything about him was so…perfect. And effortlessly so. What was I doing on a sailboat with him?

  “I don’t know about that. All I’ve had to do so far is hang on,” I said.

  “That’s ninety percent of success, right there. At least what I’ve seen of it.”

  “Which is more than most,” I said.

  He nodded agreement. “I’ve been fortunate.” Jared’s eyes flitted to mine and held them for a long beat. “You hungry?”

  Something about his tone convinced me I should say yes, even though my stomach was a tight knot. Being on the water was relaxing and dreamlike, but Jared standing only a few feet away had me tense – afraid of saying or doing the wrong thing and ruining the moment. He seemed to sense my mood and approached with a smile. “Go ahead. I’ll make sure we don’t crash into one of the islands.”

  He brushed by me, and for an instant I could feel his body against mine. A thrill ran up my spine, and I felt the urge to lean into him, but then he was past me and holding the wheel, leaving me no option but to sit by the basket and look inside.

  I gasped when I lifted the lid. Inside were all of my favorite foods – including strawberries and more Belgian chocolates. I removed the cold, sliced pesto-crusted chicken breast on sourdough bread – a familiar dinner I’d grown to love, and one of the few things my mom knew how to cook – and unwrapped one of the mini sandwiches and took a small bite.

  “This is great,” I said.

  “I’m glad I got it right this time.”

  “You have to have one,” I said, holding mine up.

  “I already did. Purely for scientific reasons – to make sure they were up to snuff,” he said with a smile.

  In spite of my tension, I managed to wolf down two of the small sandwiches and several of the chocolates and strawberries. We chatted easily as Jared steered a course toward an island near the ocean, one of several rising from the water. As we neared, I could make out a large stone building in ruins near the far point, its walls and turrets jutting from the land like broken teeth.

  I shuddered at the sight, and Jared frowned. “What’s wrong?”

  “Oh, nothing. It’s just…it reminds me of something. A nightmare I had.”

  “Last night?”

  I shook my head. “More like for as long as I can remember.”

  “The same dream?” he asked curiously.

  “That one, yes. I mean, I have several – like everyone, I suppose. But that particular one comes back a lot.” My fingers unconsciously moved to my birthmark and I shivered again.

  “Maybe it means something,” he said, turning the wheel slightly so we passed well south of the ruins.

  “I doubt it. Just your typical scary dream,” I said, wanting to change the subject. “What about you? You ever have nightmares?”

  He exhaled slowly. “No. I don’t remember any of my dreams.”

  “That’s probably not so terrible,” I observed.

  “Maybe not.”

  We rounded the island in a slow orbit and Jared pointed the bow back at the shore, allowing the breeze to push us gently along, the boat cutting through the water in near silence. He indicated the basket and grinned. “You all done?”

  “I ate too much.”

  “You can take the rest back. It’ll just go to waste otherwise.” He paused. “You want to steer for a while?”

  “You’re doing a good job.”

  “Your turn.”

  He stepped aside, and I took the wheel. He regarded me with those luminescent blue eyes, and I felt like I was floating until he looked away.

  “So, no boyfriend?” he asked.

  I forced a laugh. “Hardly. I’m concentrating on my grades. I have to if I’m going to keep my scholarship.”

  “And back home?”

  I hesitated. “That’s never really been my thing. School, trying to help my stepmom, and working to save money for college…doesn’t leave a lot besides sleeping and eating.” I didn’t say I secretly feared being abandoned or disappointed if I allowed anyone inside my defenses, so preferred to forego getting too close to anyone. I eyed him while I debated asking the question that was burning my tongue, and decided to forge ahead. “What about you?”

  A flash of white teeth, and his eyes crinkled. “It’s not like most imagine it to be. Between rehearsals, songwriting, interviews and appearances, recording, concerts, and trying to get my lines right, I don’t have a lot of time for a social life. This is a dog-eat-dog business, and if you take your eye off the ball, you’re finished.”

  “I sort of got the impression that Christina…”

  Another laugh from Jared. “It’s not like that.”

  “You never met anyone?” I pressed.

  His grin vanished, and he didn’t answer. The silence grew uncomfortable, and when he finally spoke, his tone was flat. “A long time ago. Things didn’t work out.” The bitterness in his words came through, and I decided not to pursue it – my fear of ruining the moment had come true, judging by his sudden change in mood.

  The marina materialized from the gloom, and Jared motioned for me to keep the helm as he lowered the sails. The wind abruptly died, and we drifted for a few minutes until he started the motor and took the wheel. Jared docked with the deftness he’d shown in everything else, and I was unsurprised when he sprang onto the dock and tied it off with a few quick, competent motions.

  After we stepped from the boat, he took the basket in one hand and mine in his other, sending a rush of heat through my arm. I’d never been one to want or need a male to help me do anything, but with Jared it was different – it felt right. Maybe it was because he was more worldly than I, but it just seemed natural coming from him, like genuine good manners. Perhaps I could get used to a strapping Adonis guiding me over rough spots. I resolved not to overthink it. I’d have plenty of chances to do that back at the dorm.

  He started the car, but this time left the top up because of the dropping temperature. The little dash clock said midnight, and I blinked to make sure I was seeing it clearly. It didn’t feel like anywhere near four hours had passed.

  We were on the winding main road when a headlight appeared behind us. I looked in my side mirror and spotted a motorcycle rapidly approaching. Jared’s eyes narro
wed from the glare, and he put his foot onto the gas. The Porsche pulled away from the bike, but then it sped up and resumed its approach. Jared downshifted and floored the pedal, and the engine revved effortlessly into the redline before he shifted again.

  The motorcycle dropped back as Jared continued to accelerate, the Porsche’s wide tires protesting the speed as he took the bends at a breakneck pace. I dared a glance at the speedometer and gasped when I saw the needle hovering between 135 and 140 mph. Jared seemed unfazed by the dizzying speed, carving the curves while barely slowing and then urging the sports car to the limits on the straightaways.

  Eventually the headlight vanished in the rearview mirror, and Jared grinned. “Guy wanted to dog someone, he picked the wrong car.”

  I swallowed a walnut-sized lump in my throat and managed a nod.

  Jared continued racing along the road until I recognized the stretch with Ridley on the left, and when he slowed to sixty, it felt like we were barely moving. He cut from the road and coasted to a stop by the guardhouse, and before I could say anything, he leapt from the car and rounded the back to open my door. I felt the same tingle as earlier as he helped me from the low-slung coupe, and we stood awkwardly facing each other for a moment.

  When he leaned into me and gave me a peck on the cheek, I automatically flinched and pulled back – he’d chosen my left cheek, dangerously close to my birthmark…

  His eyes registered puzzlement, but he quickly recovered. “I’m sorry,” he whispered.

  I shook my head, my eyes welling with moisture, and averted my gaze so he wouldn’t see the tears.

  “It’s not your fault,” I managed as I stepped away. “Thanks for a great night, Jared. I’ll never forget it.”

  “Lacey…”

  He reached for me, but I slipped from him and made for the driveway before I burst into tears, my chest heaving as I ran toward the gate, away from the most amazing man I’d ever met – a man who’d done nothing more than offer a chaste kiss, setting off a chain reaction of conflicting emotions so powerful they’d driven me away in a blind panic.