Adept

by J. P. Larson

  “That’s not true. These can work even when I’m not here. I can make an extract for someone’s tea, and she can use a few drops long after I’m gone.”

  “Well, true,” Iladarta replied. “But I would not have used so much magic on such a simple remedy.”

  “You haven’t taught me more efficient spells.”

  “That isn’t my point,” she said. “You did that casually. I am envious, that is all.”

  Ah. My magic pool was deeper than hers, and while I might never be as good at plant magic as she was, in ways I could do more, having more magic to spend.

  “Well. We should begin. Come.”

  * * * *

  It was already late when I got back to the house. Eva, Loralai, and Lunia were already there, of course. I collapsed on the sofa with Eva, then rotated and laid my head in her lap. “Poor baby,” she said. She leaned over and kissed my forehead. “You get five minutes, then you have spells to practice.”

  “Slave driver,” I muttered.

  “I believe Magus Erin taught you a new technique today. I want to see interlocked Mobius strips.”

  “Slave driver,” I muttered again. Then I shifted, lifted my face, and pulled her down into a proper kiss.

  * * * *

  Twoday was different from Oneday only in the details. My Twoday morning healing class was in my classroom in the tower, and I only had two students and a list of spells to teach them. I greeted Flara and Beahnina, the two apprentices who had been helping me with Fremara. “Let’s get started. We have a list of spells I am to begin teaching you. I am going to explain the entire list and demonstrate the construction of each. We’ll spend the second half of our time together working on the first.”

  After they left, I worked on the spell Erin had begun teaching me. Eva arrived ten minutes later and apologized for being late, and then she put up the beginning of a new spell for me and grinned.

  I sighed, waved away what I was doing, and tried to understand what she was demonstrating to me.

  She worked me hard until lunch, and we collected Quartain on our way back.

  I studied until late.

  Threeday and Fiveday were, essentially, repeats of Monday. Fourday was a repeat of Twoday. But Sixday was a treat.

  * * * *

  I finished my morning class with Flara and Beahnina and then ushered them from my classroom. I bundled up on the way down the stairs and then hurried across the campus, heading for the stable. Lunia was already waiting for me with two saddles horses and an extra cloak. She set it over my shoulders, grinned at me for a minute, and then helped me up. A minute later, we were on the road to Northmere and the palace.

  “It’s crisp this morning,” I said. “I wonder how soon it will snow.”

  “I’m sure there’s snow in Haltorda already.”

  “I imagine you’re right. Do you miss it?”

  “Do you?”

  “The pace was slower.”

  “I suppose it was. That’s not what I asked.”

  “I missed everyone, Lunia. You must know that.”

  She and I hadn’t really been alone in the months since I’d returned, and this was really the first time she knew we wouldn’t be interrupted. “Eva was heartbroken.”

  “I know,” I said softly.

  “I was, too.”

  “I’m sorry.”

  “I love you, Kia. You know that.”

  “I love you, too, Lunia. I already promised I won’t do anything like that again.”

  “I know.”

  I paused, my tone shifting. “The people were nice enough,” I said.

  “I suppose they were,” she replied. “What do you have against soldiers?”

  In my saddle, I stiffened. It had never occurred to me she would take that portion of my rebellion personally. “Two of my favorite three people in the world are soldiers,” I said. “I don’t have anything against them.” I paused. “I depend on you, Lunia. You know that. And I like you, both you and Loralai. You know that, too.”

  She said nothing for a while, and we rode for perhaps a mile with the only sound that of horse hooves on cobblestone. “Would helping soldiers have been horrible?”

  “Lunia, I might not have much in the way of the offensive magics, but you’ve seen what I can do with my raw power. Do you really think helping soldiers is the only way they would want to use me? But if being in the army is so great, why were you here the day I arrived?”

  “The soldiers protect Ordeen.”

  “The soldiers train to hurt each other. You train to protect me. I think that’s a pretty big difference. Don’t you?”

  She didn’t answer.

  “Lunia, maybe it’s not fair. In my mind, my view of soldiers is as big, burly men, rough men. They spend their lives learning how to hurt people. In my mind, the sort of person who likes that are the same sort of people who liked picking on me when I was young. Maybe that’s not fair. Maybe it’s completely wrong. But that’s how I saw it when I got here, and if the swordsmen and women here are examples of how wrong I am, so be it. But we’ve seen a few of the swordsmen here that are like that, haven’t we? So you want me to forget how I grew up and devote my life to helping the type of people who once picked on me? Maybe that’s not how it is, but that’s how I saw it. That’s how I still see it.”

  She didn’t say anything, and so we rode in silence for a few minutes. Then I asked, “Do you remember the clearing, that summer with Byseen?”

  “The one we found?”

  “After I was done,” I said.

  “Oh. Yes. I remember.”

  “I tore people into pieces, Lunia. I twisted heads and arms like they were apples I was plucking from a tree.”

  “You did what you had to.”

  “Do you think anyone I might report to won’t know I can do that?” I asked. “Do you think they want me in the army to heal people? Or will they train me in more efficient ways to pluck apples?”

  “I don’t know,” she said, her voice barely heard over the hoof beats. “I’m sorry. I didn’t consider that.”

  I reached across the gap between us, and she gave me her hand. We squeezed for a moment.

  “If I ever again have to pluck apples,” I said. “I know how. If Ordeen is ever attacked, of course I’ll do whatever is necessary. But barring that, I want to help people, Lunia. Not become better at hurting them.”

  “I know,” she said. “I’m sorry.”

  “You have nothing to be sorry for,” I said. “If this has been festering, I’m glad we had a chance to address it. Do I need to dig deeper? I don’t want to leave anything else behind.”

  “Yes,” she said. “You never do something like that again. You never set me aside again.”

  “I already promised that.”

  “Promise it again,” she said. “Never again.”

  “Never again,” I said.

  “Not even to protect me.”

  “Lunia-” I whined.

  “Promise me!” she said, not quite yelling. “I mean it, Kia. Promise me.”

  “Whatever happens,” I said. “We’re together.”

  “That’s right,” she said. “Whatever happens.”

  * * * *

  “Good morning, Your Majesty.” We both curtsied.

  “Knock it off,” Marie complained. “Kia, I wish to begin with a review of your current skill. Please produce each of the knowledge-based spells you know.”

  Friends

  That was my winter, more or less. Teaching and study, study and teaching.

  At times, I struggled. I struggled with my lessons. I struggled as an instructor. And I struggled as an adult now back at Northmere School of Magic. I was now an adept, the same rank as Adept Malla. Northmere had been the center of my life from when I was twelve-years-old until after my twenty-first birthday. I was now nearly twenty-four, and so I’d spent half my life as a sorceress of Ordeen. But I had arrived as a child, and at times it was difficult to remember I was no longer that scared, lost l
ittle girl.

  It came out in odd ways. As an adept, I no longer was expected to participate in the games. It was quite strange to stand on the sidelines and watch rather than to be involved.

  And I was no longer required to use titles for the adults at the school. Oh, we still did when in front of the students. I had long been calling the senior magus by her name while in private, but now I was expected to do so in front of the other magi.

  I also had freedom I hadn’t had before. Oh, I’d spent two years away, answering to no one but necessity. But being back at Northmere made me feel I was expected to follow the rules of a student, and that wasn’t the case. I could come and go as I pleased, and I didn’t have to tell anyone.

  Yeah, right. If I didn’t tell Eva, she would be rightfully vexed. And I promised Lunia I wouldn’t think of setting a single foot outside the school grounds without her. Well, and it actually wasn’t legal for me to do so. Where I went, Lunia was expected to be as well.

  But above all that, I struggled with my relationships. I didn’t feel one bit of guilt for leaving Quartain or Hallamarie. They made their bed, and if I had refused to lie in it, whose fault was that?

  But I felt guilty for what I had done to Eva and Lunia, and by extension, Lorelei. I felt guilty for what I had done to my family. And my easy relationship with Iladarta was strained. As the botany instructor, I’d always felt closer to her than to anyone else at Northmere. Now that I was back, she treated me differently. I thought it was because she was disappointed in me.

  It was Eva who figured out what was going on.

  * * *

  “We’re having a few people for dinner,” she announced. “You have time to shower.”

  “You’re not serious.”

  She looked me up and down. “I really think you’ll be more comfortable if you shower and put on clean clothes.”

  “That’s not what I meant.”

  “Go on.”

  I stared into her eyes for a minute then, muttering, headed for the bathroom.

  Twenty minutes, while I was still dressing, I heard voices. Then the door opened and closed. I looked in the mirror to see Lunia’s reflection. She crossed the room and set her hands on my shoulders, then took the brush from me and went to work on my hair.

  “You don’t have to do that,” I said.

  “I like doing it,” she replied.

  “People are here already.”

  “A few,” she said. She bent down and kissed the top of my head, then went back to brushing.

  “My hair is fine,” I protested.

  “And yet, you’re going to let me brush, anyway.”

  “What’s going on, Lunia?”

  We captured each other’s gaze in the mirror. Finally, she said simply, “I love you, Kia. You know that, don’t you?”

  “Yeah,” I whispered. “I love you, too.”

  “That first day we met,” she said. “You looked so lost.”

  “I was lost,” I said. “I don’t know what would have become of me if you hadn’t taken me in.”

  “That day was one of the most important days of my life,” she said. “There have been others.”

  “Oh?”

  “The day we saw your beacon outside Sima. No one else could have made that beacon.” She set her hands on my shoulders. I added mine on top of hers.

  “I drugged you,” I whispered.

  “No, Kia. You did not. That witch did. You saved Eva and yourself. You probably saved Hallamarie and all of Ordeen.” She bent over and kissed my head again. “There have been a few other days. The day Eva told us she had found you. Oh, that was a big one.”

  I didn’t say anything to that. Would I ever be done apologizing for running away?

  “We were afraid the queen would send Sytara after you. We didn’t think that would end well. Instead, she didn’t even argue with Eva except to insist she was coming with. I believe her words were, ‘I’m not losing both of you.’” Then she laughed. “We just missed you when you began your circuit. We thought you’d figured out we’d found you and had taken off. Eva and the queen both went crazy trying to find you again. Instead, it was Lorelei who found you.”

  “Lunia, I-”

  “I’m not sure you’re listening, Kia. You are at the center of some of the most pivotal days of my life.”

  I didn’t know what to say to that, but she wrapped her arms around me, crouching down to hug me tightly, her front against my back.

  But then I brushed a tear away and then said quietly, “You’ve raised me as much as anyone has, well, behind Mama and Grandmama. You’re not that much older than I am, but it’s been an important difference for our entire relationship.”

  We stayed like that for a minute, then she said, her voice a little rough, “We should make an appearance.”

  “Lunia, why did Eva surprise me?”

  “So you wouldn’t fret. Come on. It’s just a few friends.”

  “What’s really going on?”

  “Dinner and conversation. Maybe a few more hugs. And no titles tonight. Eva told me to tell you that.”

  “Right. No titles.”

  * * * *

  The house wasn’t full. We only had a few guests. The first I saw was Iladarta. She was fussing at some of my plants. “You don’t trust me to take care of them?” I asked her.

  She turned and smiled. “It’s the dead of winter, and they’re blooming.”

  I smiled. “You taught me that.”

  “Yes, but I was here a week and a half ago, and they were blooming then, too.”

  “And?”

  “And when I force them, it lasts a few days before they droop.”

  “And when I force them,” I said, “I give them a little blessing every morning.”

  She smiled and held out her hands. I stepped forward and took them. “You’re not the scared little girl you were twelve years ago.”

  “A lot has happened.”

  “Not all of it good,” she admitted.

  “Some of it really good,” I said.

  Iladarta pulled me to her. We hugged, and she kissed my cheek. “I love you, Kia Shortshadow. Do you have a show for us tonight?”

  I laughed. “When would I have had time to work on something?”

  “I have seen you produce a show quite casually. Perhaps you will become inspired.”

  “There she is.” I turned around. Eva was standing with Quartain. I continued to hold hands with Iladarta, but I stepped forward, pulling her with me. I let go as I stepped into Eva’s arms. We exchanged a brief kiss, and then I greeted Quartain.

  Then I stepped away, but I took her hands and lifted them. “I’m sorry,” I told her. “I haven’t been by lately. I can ease this.”

  “In a bit,” Eva said. “There are just a few others.” She took my arm and pulled me into the next room. Talking together were Cleo Greeneyes and Queen Hallamarie. “She’s Marie tonight,” Eva whispered before pulling me forward.

  The two turned. The queen was ready, and she pulled me into her embrace. “Kia,” she whispered as she kissed my cheek.

  “Hello, Marie,” I said.

  She smiled at me before turning me to Cleo. Cleo greeted me as she often did, kissing both cheeks and then brushing along me besides, sharing her perfume with me. I laughed as she did so. “I didn’t know the two of you knew each other.”

  “Oh, we go way back,” Marie said. “When I want a rumor spread around Nalori, I invite Cleo to dinner.”

  “I am always happy to serve,” Cleo replied with a smile.

  At that, Lunia stepped back to my side. She had a mug of cider for me, and Loralai had one for Eva. Cleo and Marie were already drinking something. Then Quartain and Iladarta joined us, and we widened our circle further.

  We made small talk for a while, but I watched Quartain, and I could see that standing was difficult for her. My heart went out for her, and I said, “Perhaps we could take seats. I have a new brew I wish to try on Quartain’s hands.” I didn’t, actually. It w
as the same salve I’d made before. But it was a good excuse, one I’m sure everyone saw through.

  But I found myself seated between Quartain and Marie, and then Eva handed me a jar of Dr. K’s. Cleo looked at it and smiled. “A little magic in every jar,” she said.

  “Just so,” Marie agreed. “That was a lovely interview you did of Dr. K.”

  “Thank you, Marie,” Cleo replied. “I wonder when I might have another opportunity.”

  “Not for a while,” Marie indicated. “Ask in a year or two.”

  Cleo didn’t argue but simply nodded.

  In the meantime, I bent my attention to Quartain’s feet, removing her boots carefully. Her feet were even worse than her hands, and I stared at them for a while. I felt so helpless, knowing anything I did for her was temporary. But then I used some of the salve and began to rub it into both feet, working carefully. Then I brought forth my magic, my healing magic, and held it as a ball around her feet.

  As I did so, most of the others in the room shifted in the seats, and conversation faded until Cleo asked, “What is so fascinating about Kia massaging Quartain’s feet?”

  “She’s not only massaging,” Quartain said, her voice low and her eyes closed. “Thank you, Kia.” I glanced up and saw her eyes were wet. Her feet must really hurt.

  “Dr. K. at work?” Cleo prompted.

  “One of a kind,” Marie said.

  “I can’t heal her joints,” I said. “But I can ease the swelling. It helps her sleep.”

  “I understand that’s what the little jars do,” Cleo said, waving a finger in a circle to the jar, now perched in my lap.

  “The jars are good,” Quartain said, “But they’re nothing compared to what Kia does more directly.”

  “Kia could make a very good living massaging feet,” Marie said. I looked over and she was smiling. “It wouldn’t take long before the women of Nalori realized they slept better after a simple foot massage from Kia.”

  “Is that as large a waste of her abilities as it sounds?” Cleo asked.

  “No,” I said. I looked up. “Helping people is never a waste of my abilities.”

  “Nevertheless,” Marie said, “I believe we can use Kia for more than simply massaging feet.”

  “There’s nothing simple about what she’s doing,” Quartain corrected. “But your point is taken, Marie.”