by C. Larsen
"Well, we do have that meeting with James tonight, so it can't hurt to talk to Mirowski beforehand. You can see where the coven stands and get whatever information you can about the Soul Binder who attacked Sebastian."
I make a face. "Yeah, but do we have to go in so early? Can't we sleep for a few hours before attempting delicate negotiations to save the world?”
"It sucks being so important, doesn't it?" he says with a cocky grin. "Don't worry, you'll get used to it."
Walking back into Haven Hollow High after being gone so long is bizarre. Though I know, realistically, nothing has changed, it feels alien to me. The crush of people in the halls, the inane chatter echoing off the walls, the carefree laughter.
Was I really only gone a couple months? It feels like years.
"What am I supposed to tell my teachers?" I ask Gray. "Am I even registered here anymore? I thought Vasily transferred us when we started taking online classes?"
"Don't worry, it's all taken care of. Vasily texted me this morning. He called the school and sorted it out. He even got us back into our old classes, which, unfortunately, means I won't be seeing you until lunch," he says, sighing dramatically.
"I'm sure you'll survive."
"I know I will," he says. "But what about you? I'm afraid you might go through withdrawals after spending practically every minute of the last two months in my radiant presence."
"Oh boy, I see your arrogance hasn't abated at all." I laugh.
"Never."
Gray and I split up to go to our respective homerooms. Stares and whispers follow me through the halls. I try not to let them bother me. I know it's to be expected after disappearing for so long, but it's still annoying. And it doesn't help that Gray disappeared and reappeared at the same time as me.
Right before I walk into my first class of the day, Matt stops me in the doorway with his trademark douche-bag smirk. “Three months is a long time to recover from an abortion, isn't it?" His buddies guffaw loudly behind him.
And it begins, I think, sighing to myself.
"You certainly haven't any gotten wittier since I've been gone. Abortion? That's the best you can come up with?"
"Well, isn't that why you've been gone? You got knocked up and you didn't know who the father was, so you got rid of it? That's what everyone's saying, at least." His lips pull wider, eyes sparking with vicious glee. "But I disagree. I think you were at rehab. What happened? Daddy send you away to take care of that coke problem? Maybe he shipped you off to some distant aunt, so he didn't have to deal with you anymore. Guess that didn't work though, huh? What's he gonna do next? Fling himself off a bridge like your mom?"
I wait for anger to overtake me, or embarrassment, otr the urge to hit him and wipe that arrogant smirk off his face. But oddly enough, it doesn't come. Matt stands stand there, eyes glinting with anticipation, waiting for me to fly off the handle the way I used to do when someone got in my face, but all I can think is how pathetic he is.
For the first time I can remember, the anger and rage I've always carried around with me is gone. Maybe it has to do with finally finding out the truth about my mom's death. Or maybe Gray's training has something to do with it. Standing here, looking up at Matt’s much larger figure, I know that if I wanted to, I could knock his ass to the ground and not even break a sweat.
Instead of getting angry, I just look at him with an amused smirk of my own. "Yup,” I say. “You were right. It was rehab. Can't sneak one past you." His mouth falls open in shock.
I step around him, ignoring the laughter and jeers behind me.
All throughout class, Matt continues baiting me, trying to get a reaction from me. Curiously enough, the harder he tries, the more amusing I find it. Here he is, thinking how big and important he is, but his most pressing concern seems to be to impressing his football buddies.
By the end of class, even his friends have stopped laughing at his lame attempts and begin ignoring him. I want to laugh at Matt’s petulant expression, but manage to suppress it until I'm out in the hallway on my way to history.
I arrive a little early and find Ethan and Arianna outside the door. I give Arianna a quick wave as I walk past them, studiously ignoring Ethan.
As I brush past them, his quiet voice startles me. “Emerson.”
“Yeah,” I answer warily. Next to him, Arianna grins at me excitedly.
“Ari didn’t tell me you were coming back to town today.”
“Oh my God! I missed you, Em!” Ari says, pulling me in for a hug. “I’m so glad you’re back!”
“Yeah, it was kind of a sudden decision,” I say, keeping my eyes on Ethan. His face remains smooth, not betraying anything.
“Well, welcome back.”
I stare at him in shock. The last time we spoke, he was accusing me of being happy Lydia was dead, and now he’s welcoming me back? What’s his game?
Arianna nudges him with her elbow and gives him a look.
“And I, uh, wanted to…apologize,” he says.
I blink in surprise. "Apologize?"
"After everything happened... I handled it badly. I shouldn't have blamed you for Lydia. I know it wasn't your fault."
I can smell the rage still clinging to him and I know he hasn't completely forgiven me, but at least he's trying. And if Ethan is beginning to come around, maybe there's hope for the rest of the coven too. Maybe I'll be able to pull off this truce before anyone else gets hurt.
"It's fine," I say to Ethan. "I understand."
Ethan heads off to class and Arianna walks into history with me, a huge smile breaking across her face.
Olivia isn't in class today, not that I'm surprised considering everything that went down last night. Even though I'm a little concerned that this means Sebastian's still in the process of healing, it'll be easier for me to talk to Arianna about the coven without Olivia here. Things were already tense between Olivia and Arianna before I left; now with Sebastian getting attacked, I can only imagine how much worse it will be.
Mrs. Goodman makes a short mention about my sudden return, and then directs the class to begin working on their new projects, which gives me plenty of time to talk with Arianna privately.
Choosing a place away from the rest of the class, Arianna immediately begins quizzing me about what happened with my training, why I'm back so soon, and if this means that our plan is ready to go forward.
I fumble a bit, telling her I've figured out some basics but still don't have it down quite yet. I refrain from mentioning anything about the attack on the Haven Pack last night until I know more about it. When she finally runs out of steam, I begin casually asking her questions about the coven.
"Is Mirowski still in charge, or has Richard taken over?"
She makes a face. "Mirowski still, but I'm not sure for how long... Richard has a lot of support."
This isn't good news. If Richard becomes the High Priest, I'll never get the coven to agree to a truce.
"How are thing with you guys and the—" I look around, lowering my voice. "With you guys and the Haven Pack?"
Her eyebrows raise, mouth thinning. "Not very good, as you can see," she says, waving her hand at Olivia's empty desk. At my look, she clarifies, "Olivia and the rest of them haven't been in school for a couple of weeks. We all think they’re preparing for some sort of attack."
"Have there been any?" I try to keep alarm out of my voice. Was it Night’s Hallow that attacked Sebastian last night?
"Not yet." She sighs. "And between you and me, I really hope Mirowski can figure out how to keep it that way."
I let out the breath I was holding. If it was them last night, at least Arianna didn't have anything to do with it...
"Do you think Mirowski would meet with me?"
"I'm sure he would, but if you're looking to get back into the coven, you might want to give it some more time. It's not that everyone still blames you," she hurries to say. "They just need a bit more time. I mean look at Ethan. If he can come around, then I'm sure the res
t will too."
"Right," I say, rolling my eyes. "And you didn't have anything to do with Ethan apologizing just now, right?"
She gives me a small smile. "Maybe a little... But honestly, he knew he was being an ass. I didn't force him to apologize, that was all him."
"Uh-huh," I say, not believing her.
"Well, it's only a matter of time until the rest of the coven apologizes too. But if Mirowski accepts you back in now, it may just be the move that gets him removed as High Priest."
"Don't worry," I assure her. "I have no intention of rejoining them. I just want to keep the coven and pack from an all-out war."
Chapter 38
As I'm on my way to my next class, I happen to pass Caiden in the hallway. Ever since Josh's comments last night, I've been terrified that Caiden had something to do with Sebastian's attack. I've tried telling myself Caiden would never do something like that, but I know too well how deep his hatred for werewolves runs.
Without giving myself time to chicken out, I dart across the hall and drag him into an empty classroom.
Initially he looks surprised, maybe even happy to see me, but it flashes to anger after my first question.
"Please tell me you had nothing to do with the attack on Sebastian."
"Attack? Is that what he said it was?"
"What would you call it when someone is ambushed and almost killed?"
Confusion enters his eyes. "Killed? What are you talking about?"
"The group of witches that ambushed him last night. They had a Soul Binder who put some sort of hex on him. If I hadn't gotten to him when I did, he'd be dead now."
His face darkens. "Is that why you came back here? To save that animal?"
I step back, staring at him as if he's a stranger. "I wasn't going to sit by and let Sebastian die. What happened to you? You used to actually care about people."
"I do care. About people—not monsters. Werewolves are just savage beasts. They don't deserve your compassion or your help. If you were smart, you would have stayed where you were safe."
"Safe? Wake up Caiden, I'm not safe anywhere. You really think I was safe in Ashwood? If anything, Ashwood is even more dangerous for me than here!"
"What are you talking about?"
"They know about the prophecy, Caiden."
"Who? The pack or the coven?"
"Both. They're in an alliance, remember? The pack only knows a portion on the prophecy, but it’s enough to make me a target." I quickly explain about the prophecy and how I'm apparently the Chain Breaker, the attack of the rogue werewolves, and Madelyn’s comments about war being inevitable. The only part I leave out is that I’m a Soul Binder myself. I can't explain that part to him without revealing my mixed blood.
Caiden's face pales. "The prophecy says you can free them? Why didn’t Lydia didn't say anything about that?"
"She didn't know the full prophecy. Only a few witches do, including Caroline. Do you know if anyone in the coven knows anything more about this? Did Caroline talk to anyone about it before she left?"
"Not that I know of."
I sigh, disappointed. "And you really didn't have anything to do with the attack last night?"
"No. I knew nothing about it. I swear."
"Then what attack were you talking about?"
He looks away, cheeks reddening.
"Caiden?" What could he have done that could possibly cause him to look so ashamed?
"I tried accessing Sebastian's memories," he finally admits.
"You what!? Caiden...you can't just rummage through people's minds like that!"
"You didn't seem to have a problem when we were trying to find out about your mom," he snaps back.
Huh, he's got me there... The irony of chastising Caiden for this isn't lost on me, considering that what I did to Gray was so much worse…
"Yeah, but you’re supposed to be the responsible one. Aren't you always telling me we shouldn't use our abilities on anyone without their permission?"
"We have to know that they're up to," he says defensively, meeting my eyes. "We have to be prepared for an attack."
I rub my forehead, wishing I had gotten a little more sleep before having to deal with all this. "Well…did you find out anything?"
"Not really. It took me longer than it should have to get into his head, and once I did, Josh must've noticed something was up and they both took off before I could find out anything useful."
"Yeah, well that was stupid of you. Our powers don't work very well on weres'. I doubt you would have been able to get much from Sebastian, even if Josh hadn't interrupted. And if Josh had suspected you were using your abilities on Sebastian, he'd have all the provocation the pack needs to make a move. You can't do things like that. Josh said your scent is all over their territory. I'm guessing you were also spying on them?"
Caiden makes a face, confirming my suspicions.
"Caiden, you have to stay away from them. They already suspect you were a part of last night’s attack. It's too dangerous for you to take these kinds of risks."
"You're lecturing me on caution?" he asks, almost smiling.
"It's not funny. This whole thing is one misstep away from erupting into all-out war, and your spying may be the spark that ignites it. You have to stay away."
"You think I want a war?" he asks angrily. "I may agree that the world would be a better place without those animals in it, but I don't want a war any more than you do. I'm trying to stop it."
"You are?"
"Of course. But the coven needs retribution before they'll even consider ending hostilities."
"What kind of retribution?"
"Blood for blood. Lydia's murderer needs to pay. It's the only way the coven will agree to a truce."
"You want to the pack to hand over the werewolf who killed Lydia so you guys can punish him? That's insane. The pack will never agree to it."
"They don't have to. If we knew who it was, we could take care of him ourselves, quickly and quietly. The pack wouldn't even know it was us."
"Take care of it? Take care of it how?"
"Blood for blood. A life for a life."
My blood freezes cold at the look in his eyes.
"Are you listening to yourself? You're talking about murder!"
"I'm talking about retribution," he says, ice in his voice.
"You were there last month. You saw the coven attack the pack first. You saw them almost kill me! What happened to Lydia was an accident. You know that! How can you be okay with this?"
"I have to find out who the murderer is. If I don't find out soon, Richard's going to lead an attack that'll get a lot more of us killed. One life to save dozens."
"This can be done without anyone having to die."
"No, it can't."
We glare at each other, furious. But the longer he stares, the more his face softens.
"I can't believe you're back," he finally says, his voice gentler.
"I'm sure you've already concocted ten different bullshit reasons why I should leave again, but I can't. I won't."
"I don't want you to leave again," he says. "I mean, you should, it isn't safe here for you. But I never wanted you to leave. I’ve really missed you, Emerson."
I blink, shocked. "What? How can you say that? After what you said to me before, what you accused me of? You said you'd never forgive me for Lydia. You told me to leave before I get any more of your friends killed!"
He looks down, shame-faced. "I know what I said. I know how much it hurt. But you know how stubborn you can be.” He meets my gaze, eyes warm with sincerity. “It was the only way I could get you to leave."
He steps forward, placing his hands my shoulders. "Em, I didn't mean anything I said then. I don't blame you for Lydia. It wasn't your fault. But I had to get you to leave. The entire coven was on edge, blaming you for what the pack did. It wasn't safe for you here. I thought if you hated me, then you'd be more likely to go with Madelyn."
I stare at him, unsure what to believe
. His emerald gaze looks deep into mine. "After the party, after I told you..." He trails off, eyes searching mine.
After he told me what? That he loves me? That he killed my mom? What?
"After I told you how I felt about you, I knew you wouldn't leave."
My breath catches in my throat. Does he mean what I think he means? That it wasn't just some offhand, drunken comment? That he really is in love with me?
"I knew the only way to keep you safe was to make you think I hated you. I'm so sorry. Sorry for hurting you. Sorry for lying to you. But I had to keep you safe any way I could."
He leans down, lips inches from mine. My mind turns fuzzy, making it difficult to think. My limbs feel heavy, heart pounding in my ears. Just before his lips touch mine, a growl emerges from deep in my mind. My head clears, the thin filaments of Caiden’s magic fading away.
I jerk back, out of his grasp.
Confusion crosses his face, followed by hurt.
His hand reaches for my face, but I step back, out of reach. "Caiden, we can't."
"Why not? You care about me. I know you do."
I look away, trying to clear my still fuzzy thoughts. He doesn't know about me and Gray yet. I should tell him. I have to. But I can't find the words fast enough.
"I shouldn't have pushed you away before," he continues. "After everything that happened with Lydia... And I had just found out about your mom... about Caroline. I didn't know what to do. I thought, once you found out how your mom died, you'd hate me. But you didn't. And then I said those horrible things to you, to get you to leave. To keep you safe. But you're back now. And whatever is going on with the coven and the pack, we'll handle it. We'll figure it out. I want to be with you, Emerson. Everything else, we'll deal with it."
I can feel my pulse in every part of my body as my heart hammers in my chest. A few months ago, I would have melted at hearing these words. Now, all I can think about is how fast he turned his back on me after Lydia died. How quick he was to shut me out, to blame me for what happened. He says he only did it to keep me safe, but even if that was true—which I'm not so sure about—it wouldn't make it any better. He turned on me so easily. Chose to hurt me rather than tell me the truth and trust me to make my own choices.