And One Wore Gray

by Heather Graham

  “And we didn’t know if you or Jesse would manage to get there, and so we decided that we had to,” Kiernan finished from the wagon.

  “Jesu! Christa would understand. We’re in the midst of a war!”

  “Mum?”

  A sound from the back of the wagon suddenly distracted Daniel. He looked around the rough wood exterior and jumped.

  His son was standing, holding on to the wagon. Bright blue eyes looked at him with no recognition. A second pair of blue eyes stared at him, too, as John Daniel leaned up to see what was going on. Except for the difference in their ages, the little boys might have been twins.

  Like Jesse and I, he thought. And then emotion seemed to rush in on him. My son is standing, maybe walking. He forms words now, and he doesn’t know who I am. He has gotten so big, and I haven’t been there to see him stand, to take his first steps.

  This was war. He could still remember Beauty’s strong feelings on the subject. Duty came first. House and home came later.

  Still, how could a man make house and home come later when his family was sitting in front of him, and the war itself was all around them?

  He decided that he didn’t give a damn about the war for the moment. He left Callie’s side and walked around to the wagon.

  “Hello,” he said softly to the boys.

  “Mum,” Jared repeated.

  “He doesn’t say very much,” John Daniel advised his uncle. “He’s just a little over a year, you know.”

  Daniel grinned, tousling his nephew’s hair. “And you’re just over two, young man!” He reached out to his son. Jared observed him with wide blue eyes. Don’t shy away from me, he thought. Please, don’t shy away from me!

  For a moment, he was certain that Jared would. Then the little boy reached out with his chubby little arms and Daniel swept him up, hugging him fiercely.

  Callie had come around the wagon. He saw her over his son’s dark head. She watched him gravely, and he wondered for a brief moment just what it might be like if they could only have a normal relationship, if they could only have a life! She was so beautiful. And she had given him this child, and so far she had cared for his child alone, and she had done so in his home, or in Richmond.

  “He’s big now,” Daniel told her softly.

  She smiled. She’d never seemed to begrudge him Jared, or to begrudge him any of his son’s affections. She’d been so independent, but she’d bowed to him in so many things. Yet, he’d been stronger, he’d had the ability to take Jared and make her come south.

  But he’d never forced her to stay, yet she had done so anyway.

  “Very big,” she agreed.

  “Why in heaven did you come to Richmond?” he asked her.

  She shrugged. “They needed help at the hospital.”

  “So you came to Richmond to patch together Rebs.”

  “Rebels, Yankees, whoever came in,” she agreed.

  He buried his face against his son’s throat. “You were there for little Joe’s funeral?”

  “And Jeb Stuart’s,” she said softly. “We could hear the cannon through it all.”

  “What did you two think that you were doing, riding out with the children like this?”

  “Daniel, I’m not afraid—”

  “Callie, you should be afraid!”

  He gritted his teeth. They hadn’t been so far from here a little over two years ago. Was it two years ago? It felt as if he had been fighting forever. He had been injured, Kiernan had been expecting the baby, and the ride home had seemed endless. We’re going in circles! he thought, feeling they were back to that time. Somehow, he had to get them home. Grant’s forces were quiet at this hour, but that could change anytime.

  He handed Jared to Callie. “I’ll ask for time to bring you home,” he told her.

  “Daniel, we are capable—”

  “Callie,” he snapped roughly, “you’re taking my son and my nephew through battle lines!”

  She stiffened. Dear Lord, why was he always yelling? What little ground they had made toward one another in a year of absence and a smile seemed suddenly to be swept away.

  “I have never risked our child!” she said. He thought that the brilliance in her eyes might be that of tears. “But take time, Daniel, yes, please, take time! it’s a way to get you out of the front lines of this war!”

  She sounded bitter, ironic.

  Almost as if she had missed him.

  He turned away from her and mounted his horse, anxious to find his superiors. Had it been just two days before, he knew he never would have been given any leave to travel.

  But now Grant was ominously silent.

  He was able to find both Wade Hampton—Stuart’s successor with the cavalry—and Fitzhugh Lee, Robert E.’s talented nephew. Both thought him insane at first, but the explanation that his wife had simply appeared in the road was taken well by both men, and he was granted leave to escort his wife and son back to Cameron Hall.

  Signing a pass so that Daniel could move unharrassed through any Confederate lines, General Hampton warned him, “Make haste. It seems that the Yanks have started terrorizing all of the countryside, and I must have you back. On your honor, sir!”

  He left his lieutenant in charge, and begged his men to obey him as they would himself, promising to return swiftly.

  He came back to the wagon, tied his horse to the back, and urged Callie to move over so that he might take the reins.

  He met Kiernan’s eyes over Callie’s. They both remembered the last time they had taken such a ride. They both remembered the dangers they had met along the way.

  He urged the horse forward. “Home, horse!” he told the nag. And they started off.

  They rode for miles in near silence, Janey in the back with the boys; Daniel, Callie, and Kiernan in the front. No troops accosted them.

  The cannons were quiet. Along the lush and beautiful countryside, they heard no sound of guns. Summer had come to the land beautifully. The foliage was brilliantly green, and there was a soft breeze as they rode. Upon occasion, they passed a burned-down house, or a field stripped of any good supply it might have carried. Only then did it seem possible that there was a war.

  How quickly the land made up for the things that befell it! Daniel thought. For once they passed by such a place, the deep forests took over once again.

  By nightfall, he moved into one of the forest trails, glad that he was in a place he knew so well. He was determined not to go into Williamsburg, but to skirt around it, and thus come home that way.

  He jumped down from the wagon, and reached up for Callie. She hesitated, then set her hands upon his shoulders and allowed him to lift her down. He released her quickly, though, and reached for Kiernan.

  “We’re staying here tonight?” Callie asked.

  He nodded. “You two and Janey can sleep with the boys in the back. I’ll keep watch now. Try to get some sleep. I don’t know if I can stay up the whole night. If not, the two of you will have to stay up together. Can you do it?”

  Callie nodded. “Yes, of course we can.”

  “Then get some sleep.”

  He sat down before the wagon, and loaded his guns. He had two Colts, and a Spencer repeating rifle that he had taken from the ground at the Wilderness.

  The gun hadn’t saved its previous Yank owner from the fires of hell, but Daniel prayed that now it could keep them all safe.

  Callie didn’t go to sleep right away. He was startled to find her by his side, offering him a cup of water and some bread and dried beef.

  Rations had been more than slim since their last campaign had begun. He didn’t hesitate, but took the water and the food from her.

  While he ate, he watched her. She seemed to have acquired a composure and a serenity since he had seen her last. Her eyes met his, then fell, rich sweeping lashes creating shadows on her cheek. She sat close to him, nearly touching him. The sweet feminine scent of her was nearly more than he could bear.

  He touched her cheek. Her eyes, g
ray and silver and luminous, came to his once again. “How have you been, Callie? Tending to the sick and wounded, how have you been yourself?”

  “Well,” she told him. She poured more water into his cup. “Except when we read the death notices. I always knew that I would not find your name on the list. I felt certain that I would hear if you had been injured, if you had been …”

  “Killed?”

  “Yes,” she said flatly.

  He caught hold of her wrist. “I’m not going to die, Callie. I’m good, I’m careful.”

  “No. You’re a colonel. I know you’re probably reckless! I …”

  Her voice trailed away, for his eyes were so hot upon her.

  He watched her mouth, and suddenly, he could bear it no longer. He leaned forward, pulling her into his embrace, and kissed her. He touched her lips with his own, ground down upon them. He parted her lips with his tongue, and he felt her give to him. He filled her mouth with his kiss, tasting, savoring, needing. She gave fully to him. Their tongues met, wet, hot, touching, dancing, needing more.

  Then out of the near darkness, he heard a warning cry.

  “Daniel! There’s someone on the road,” Kiernan cried from the wagon.

  He pressed Callie from him, leaping to his feet. Kiernan was right and he should have heard it. There was a horseman coming nearer and nearer. He backed behind the tree that blocked the wagon and tried to look around it. Darkness had come, and there was very little moon. What there was seemed to be behind a cloud.

  The cloud moved and he saw a Yankee horseman coming.

  Daniel strode quickly down the road, keeping to the shadows. He shimmied up the trunk of a tree just in time to see the shadowed rider pause.

  The rider had heard him. The rider had sensed danger.

  He urged his horse forward, closer.

  Daniel leapt from the tree and onto the horseman. He swept the rider from his horse, and together they rolled and rolled on the dark ground, both grunting, both breathing hard. An elbow caught Daniel in the ribs. He nearly cried out. He shoved a fist into a muscled gut.

  He briefly obtained the upper hand, straddling over his enemy.

  The cloud moved completely.

  “Jesse!”

  “Daniel, Jesu, you scared the damn hell out of me!” Jesse swore.

  “You’re lucky I didn’t shoot you!” Daniel stood quickly, stretching down a hand to his brother. Jesse stood. For a moment they stared at one another in the moonlight. Then they stepped forward and embraced. “How the hell did you come to be here?” Daniel demanded.

  “Mutual friends,” Jesse said dryly. “I heard that my wife had passed by Cold Harbor, and that my brother was taking her home.”

  “And you got leave?”

  Jesse shrugged. “There weren’t many wounded left alive after Cold Harbor,” he said bitterly,

  The two went no further in their conversation, for they were suddenly interrupted by a shrill, glad cry. They started and turned, and Kiernan came leaping out of the darkness, running like a bat out of hell to reach Jesse.

  She catapulted into his arms. Daniel stepped aside as the two of them greeted each other with one of the most tender and passionate kisses he’d ever witnessed. A throat cleared softly, and he realized that Callie was on the other side of the entwined pair, a child in either arm.

  Jesse and Kiernan split apart, Daniel could hear his brother inhale sharply. “John Daniel and Jared, is it?” He took his son from Callie, staring at the little boy. “John Daniel … you’ve gotten so big! Do you know who I am?”

  John Daniel surveyed him studiously. “He’s Uncle Daniel. You’re my father.”

  “That’s right,” Jesse said. He hugged the boy, and he glanced at Callie again, grinning. “Welcome to the family,” he told her.

  “Thank you,” Callie replied. She glanced nervously at Daniel. “If Jesse came upon us so easily …”

  “Then we need to be very careful, because anybody could. I’ll take the first watch, and Jesse can take the second,” Daniel said.

  “Who are we watching out for now?” Callie asked softly. “The Yanks or the Rebs?”

  “Either,” Jesse and Daniel answered together.

  “All of you, go and get some sleep,” Daniel said. He glanced at Callie. He could still taste her kiss. It had been sweet, so much so that if Kiernan hadn’t been on guard, he wouldn’t have heard Jesse coming.

  “Everyone, go to sleep,” he persisted. “I’m best on guard by myself.”

  Callie turned away, hugging Jared to her.

  Kiernan’s eyes still shimmered as she looked at Jesse. The two of them, with John Daniel between them, walked away.

  Stiff as a poker, Daniel sat down to keep guard.

  There were no other interruptions. He sat awake and alert for hours, but nothing moved but the breeze through the trees. At about three, Jesse came and tapped him on the shoulder. “Go get some rest. I’ll take it from here.”

  Daniel nodded. He rose, stretched, and yawned, and started for a tree. “Over there,” Jesse directed him.

  Daniel looked where Jesse pointed. Callie was there. She was sound asleep, but she had stretched out a blanket that was plenty large for them both and Jared.

  Jared was in his mother’s arms. Daniel stretched out at her back and held her tenderly. It wasn’t exactly what he wanted. Not when the scent of her was so intoxicating. It was good to hold her. To hear her sigh softly and curve against him, even as she slept.

  When Callie awoke, she felt his hand on her upper arm. She started and turned, and found his enigmatic blue gaze upon her. “We’ve got to go,” was all that he said. He had slept with her, she thought. He had held her through the night, given her his warmth.

  Pretend that you love me.

  He was quickly on his feet and reaching a hand down to her. She accepted his help to rise, then turned for Jared, who was still sleeping. Daniel leaned past her, picking up their sleeping son. He nodded toward the wagon. Jesse and Kiernan and Janey were there, waiting for them.

  “I’ll ride on ahead and scout the road,” Daniel said.

  “I can do it—” Jesse said.

  “It’s still supposed to be Rebel territory,” Daniel reminded him. “I’ll go.” He handed Jared to Callie, then untied his horse from the back of the wagon and mounted up. Callie watched him ride ahead.

  There was a difference in the brothers now, she thought sadly. Jesse’s uniform was in sound shape. Daniel was in near rags again.

  Yet no matter how tattered his uniform became, there was still something majestic in his appearance. The plume remained high in his hat, his shoulders were broad. He still seemed a part of some sweet chivalry gone past. She wanted to reach out and hold on to that chivalry.

  “Let me help you up,” Jesse told her. “Kiernan, ride with me up front?”

  “Of course,” Kiernan said softly.

  Callie was still tired, and Janey seemed weary herself. Callie lay in the back of the wagon with Jared, closed her eyes, and dreamed.

  It had been something to see Kiernan and Jesse as they had spotted one another. Something to watch their every step as they moved toward one another. Something to watch their kiss.

  She wanted Daniel to love her that way. Wholeheartedly, with no reservations. Without the terrible mistrust that always stood between them.

  She must have dozed, for she could see the long, long drive to Cameron Hall. Daniel was coming down that walk, her tattered cavalier. She saw him, and he saw her. His eyes lit up as his brother’s had done for Kiernan. Her hand flew to her throat, her heart quickened. Suddenly she was running, running …

  He was running, too, to greet her. He reached her, and she was in his arms, and then his lips were on hers, and he was spinning with her, spinning beneath a beautiful, red setting sun.

  She awoke with a start. Janey was sitting up in the back of the wagon. She looked at Callie and smiled. “Home, child. We’re home.”

  Christa came running out to the steps.
Daniel was dismounting, and she threw herself at him, hugging him first. She went on to Jesse, and then to Kiernan, and then she came to the rear of the wagon. “Oh, you came! You all came, every one of you. Give me the boys, Callie, one by one. There we go, you scamps. Janey—”

  But Daniel was there, lifting Janey out, then reaching for his wife. She slipped into his arms, watching his eyes as he slid her down to the ground, his movement slow, his touch warm.

  “Let’s get in,” Christa said. “We don’t want any of the neighbors to notice Jesse.”

  Their nearest neighbor was acres away, but it seemed they all believed that Christa had a point. Callie found herself back in the house, greeting Jigger once again, and Patricia and Jacob Miller. It seemed that they all talked forever, avoiding the war, and then Daniel rose, saying that he was going to go and find their new overseer.

  Callie watched him rise and impulsively asked Patricia to take Jared, and she followed her husband out.

  He wasn’t in any great hurry to find the overseer. He had headed straight for the old family burial ground, and was standing broodingly by the fence. He heard her coming, and his back was still to her when he spoke. “What is it, Callie?”

  She paused, then kept coming. “You tell me, Daniel,” she said softly. “What is it?”

  He turned and stared at her hard. “What do you mean?”

  She lifted her hands, tears making her eyes glisten silver. “I came here, I married you. I lived here, among all my enemies. I waited for months. I served the enemy. I mourned for you, Daniel. For Joe, for Beauty. Jesu, Daniel, what more do you want from me? Why can’t you—”

  “Why can’t I do what, Callie?”

  “I love you, Daniel. I’ve tried to show you that in every way that I know how. Why can’t you love me?” she said softly.

  It seemed he stared at her the longest time, his gaze nearly cobalt.

  “I do love you,” he said, the words so quiet they might have been a rustling in the trees overhead. His voice was deep when he continued, “I love you more each day this wretched war keeps me from you.”

  Stunned, she heard the words tumbling from her. “But you hold me at arm’s length! You don’t really believe—”