“Oh, she does. Sejal,” Dharini cooed as she tested out the name. “How are they?”
“Well, the thing is, Sona’s family lost money in that bad investment too. So it wasn’t just Amma and Appa, like everyone seemed to think.”
Dharini looked toward the front door. “No one told me.”
“I think we’ve all been a little guarded with our truths, and it’s time to stop. But I have to know. Is it so important that you get engaged in the next year, or can it wait for some time? Can it wait until I have things figured out?” If Dharini could just agree to wait a year, then he could figure out if he and Emma were the real thing, or if he needed to go back to the drawing board. At least he had an algorithm that worked now.
“Rishi, I know I’m the youngest. I know I’m the little sister. But why didn’t anyone ask me what I think until now?” She shook her head, like he was a misbehaving toddler who should have known better. “I don’t want to marry anybody who doesn’t accept my family for who they are. I don’t care if my oldest brother married the wrong woman. I don’t care if my other older brother marries some American with red hair. All I care about is that you are happy, and that I can find someone who will be happy with me. For who I am. For who my family is. I wouldn’t want in-laws who judge my family. I’m old enough to know how the world works. And I’m also old enough to decide what’s right and what’s wrong.”
Rishi was stunned into silence. His little sister was so grown up now. Maybe she wasn’t as traditional as he’d thought. She’d always had opinions, but what she’d said was unexpected to say the least.
“But you should have told me about Sudhar. He’s my brother too.” She looked so hurt, so lost beside him.
Rishi bit at his lip. “You’re right. I should have told you about Sudhar. But maybe you and I can get the family back together. You should at least hear what he has to say.”
She stared out into the street like an accident victim in shock and then nodded. “I can’t believe he had a baby and didn’t reach out to me.”
“He’s terrified of Mom and Dad. Probably didn’t want to put you in a bad position.”
“Yeah. Amma can be a little scary when you cross her.”
“No shit. Considering that, are you sure you can settle for a husband whose family doesn’t care about Sudhar marrying outside the community and losing our family’s money? And then maybe even with me marrying way outside?” God, had he really just said that out loud? Emma wasn’t even speaking to him.
“It wouldn’t be settling. I would never want to be with someone who wasn’t interested in joining our family because of one mistake. I mean, if what you say is true, then Sona’s family isn’t even that bad. Maybe just stupid.”
Rishi laughed. “Maybe not the whole family. I think it was just one shady uncle.”
The milkman’s scooter hummed up to the front gate. Rishi ran down and grabbed a packet of milk. “Coffee?” He returned to the bench and dangled it in front of his sister.
“Yes. And you can tell me all about this American girl.”
“Emma?”
“Yes, Emma. Emma and Sejal. So maybe two new ladies in our lives.”
Rishi could only dream that his parents would be so welcoming of these two new additions.
CHAPTER 37
After a brief period of chaos when his mom walked into the kitchen and saw him and his sister making morning coffee, things settled down. His mother kept mentioning preparations for the engagement ceremony, assuming that was why Rishi was there, and Rishi couldn’t keep ignoring her comments.
He excused himself to take a bath and, with the bedroom door closed, pulled out his phone and searched for Radhika’s number. It was almost nine. Was that too early to call? She would probably be getting ready to go to the office.
If she was upset over what he had to say, then she could find some sympathy with her friends at work. If she was seriously upset, she could call in sick. Morning was fine. And Rishi was desperate. But hopefully his new “truth conquers all” approach would work.
He pressed the call button, sealing his fate for good.
When Rishi exited the shower, his father’s voice was booming from the living room. After throwing on some jeans and a T-shirt, he glanced at the message on his phone. Everything would be okay. Maybe.
He tiptoed down the hall and listened to their conversation.
“Not ready? Every man is ready for marriage!” his father huffed.
“What is this about? No marriage at all or just not now?” his mother cried out, panic welling up inside her.
“He wants to do the right thing, and I think we should allow him to. He wants to be ready for his wife, and now is not the right time,” his sister said. Oh no, what had happened when he was in the bath?
“He’s not been ready for years. When will the day come? All of the good ones will be gone by then. He’ll be like that old uncle down the street with his twenty-three-year-old wife. I don’t like that.” His mother shook her head.
“And Radhika? And her family? What will they say?”
At this, Rishi had to step in; it was now or never. He walked around the corner.
“I already told Radhika,” he said. “I called her and told her I wasn’t going to marry her. She knows.” His parents stared at him, their mouths open, faces twisted in confusion. He wouldn’t add that she’d cried. That she’d already told her friends she was getting married. That people would think something was wrong with her.
But Rishi had tried to use his charm and talked her down. “You are so beautiful and smart and amazing,” he’d said. “Any man will be lucky to have you. I mean, how many have you turned down already?”
“Seven,” she’d said between her sniffles.
That was more than he’d expected. “Radhika, you know it’s not you. I think you’re great. It’s just not right. I’m in love with someone else.”
The words had just come out. And they hadn’t felt wrong or shameful or false. He’d smiled. How simple it was, just to be open about it.
“Bastard!” Then she’d hung up on him. And his smile had disintegrated. He hadn’t necessarily expected her to be happy or anything, but no one had ever called him a bastard before.
He called back, but she didn’t answer, so he texted her five apologies. When he’d gotten out of the shower, though, he had a response.
OK.
She’d said okay. Which was better than anything he’d hoped for.
And then, shortly after that came another one. There was another one for me too.
She’d had someone else in mind this whole time as well? He’d shaken his head at the ridiculousness of it.
His parents both started with their questions at the same time. “Why didn’t you say anything earlier? What will her parents say? When will we get grandchildren?”
“Look, this isn’t the right time. I’m not going to get married now, and if you keep pushing it, I’ll never get married and you’ll never get grandchildren from me.” His voice got louder than he’d intended. Maybe he was pushing it. He glanced at his mother; her face looked pale. “I want all these things as much as you do, but you need to let me do it my way. Dharini is okay with it, and that’s what is important.”
He looked back and forth between them. “You need to think about me. It’s my life. The rest of my life. We’ll all be happy if you just let things happen naturally.”
“Rishi’s happiness is important,” his sister agreed, breaking the tense silence that had settled over the room. “I’m not marrying anyone who won’t accept us for who we are and what we have.”
His mother stood up and walked with shaky steps past him. She paused outside her bedroom door. “You don’t know how people are. It’s not the same for us.”
“I suppose I have to call the parents,” his father said, sighing. He swung his head around to look at Rishi. “I assume you apologized to Radhika and she’s okay.”
“Yes. I apologized many times.”
; His father nodded. “Maybe I can appeal to them and still keep the job offer.”
“Sure, Appa, you should try that.” He had to at least sound reassuring. “But if it doesn’t work, we’ll be okay.”
Rishi walked over to his sister, who was finishing up her coffee. “Thanks, sis. I owe you one.”
She smiled. “You owe me some sleep. You’d better be nice to her.”
Rishi didn’t need to ask who she was referring to. And he would. He would be very, very nice. If she would have him.
CHAPTER 38
Emma had made it to Friday. She just had to get through one day of work, and then she’d have the weekend to figure out what to do. She could evaluate if staying in Bangalore for countless more months would be possible, or if she should just contact Maria and see if she could come back to Seattle early.
She was still in bed, even though she should already have been at work by now, and curled her knees to her chest, the sick feeling in her stomach swelling if she didn’t. Her eyes burned from tears that had welled up and made her eyelashes sticky. Why hadn’t it felt this bad when Jeremy had stopped talking to her? She and Rishi had known each other for less time, and logically this should have been easier to get over, right? But maybe logic wasn’t at play here. Maybe it was the murmur in the back of her head that she’d been ignoring. Fearing.
Love.
And now he was gone. She stared at the text he’d sent earlier.
Emma, don’t give up on me. I’m going to make it right.
What could that mean, when his engagement was days away?
She hugged her arms tight around her belly.
It had been so easy to tell Jeremy the truth about how she felt. That it was over between them.
The phone vibrated on her table. Rishi’s name appeared on the screen. And that picture she’d taken of him in Cochin, propped up on the bed. She wished she’d deleted it and replaced it with a poo emoji or something. Now she had to look at it every time he called and she didn’t answer. Another seething reminder.
She pressed her lips together. What was he calling for? And should she answer now, after that text? After all the hurt and all the worry and all the heartache? No. She’d let it ring.
It took all she had to get up and walk into the bathroom, then pack up her laptop. She needed to leave for work. Telling people she had food poisoning could only work so many times.
She glanced at her phone before putting it in her purse. A text from Rishi.
Please pick up. Or call me. It’s urgent.
What if someone had died? What if it was about the project? Urgent? What did that mean?
She took a deep breath and had resigned herself to calling him when her phone rang again.
“Rishi? Is everything okay? I mean, with work.” She tried to sound calm, like she hadn’t been fretting over him every day this past week.
“Oh my God, thank you for answering. I was worried you wouldn’t.”
She took a deep breath and remembered her pride. Reminded herself that she couldn’t let him hear her heart breaking over the phone. He couldn’t have that power. “Nonsense, I can be professional. We still work together.”
“Emma, there is nothing professional about this call. What are you doing this weekend? Please say nothing.”
“Um . . .” She racked her brain for something, anything, that would sound like she was back on her feet and not totally destroyed. Before she could think of something, he’d started talking again.
“Come to Madurai. I’m here. I bought you a ticket. I want you to come here, meet me, see where I’m from. Meet my parents. Everything. All of it.” He sounded so happy, hopeful. Could this be real?
The twisting in Emma’s stomach untangled and turned to confusion. Everything. All of it. All of him—that’s what he’d meant. “Your parents?” she said to clarify.
“Yes. It’s all over. The wedding’s off. I want to prove it to you. I love you, and I—I mean, does that freak you out?”
Love? Emma’s heart soared in her chest, but her brain told it to stay put. Tears of joy threatened to prick at her eyes. Not yet. She couldn’t let her emotions get the best of her again. What was happening? “Rishi, I don’t know. We need to talk. Your family . . . the lies . . .”
“Yes, I know. God, I was such an idiot. I want to make it up to you. We can talk here. I want to show you around. But we can talk before too. Okay, how about if I come back to Bangalore tonight, and then we take the bus to Madurai in the morning? Or I’m sure there’s a flight. I’ll look. Give me a sec.” Rishi was speaking a hundred miles an hour, blazing through his words like a bullet train.
He was crazy. Losing his mind. “Rishi, I can travel by myself. I’m a big girl.”
“So you’ll come? Thank God! I was worried I’d lost you. That you’d found someone else.”
His words ripped a hole in her chest. If he only knew just how much she didn’t want to be anyone else’s. “Seriously?”
“I’m not kidding. I had a ‘life flash before my eyes’ kind of moment.” He paused. “Okay, you’re going to come? It’s going to be good, and this is all going to work out.”
Work out? Had he done it? “The wedding is off for real this time? There’s no engagement ceremony?”
“No. Nothing. I’m a free man with extremely pissed-off parents. Look, I felt terrible about keeping information from you. I thought I was protecting you, and instead I was digging a hole for myself. More like a grave. You said you didn’t want to have anything to do with me until all that was taken care of. And it’s taken care of. I called Radhika, told my parents. It’s done. I’m yours. If you’ll have me.”
She still couldn’t get the words I love you out of her head. But there were other things to consider. “Your parents . . . do they know about me? About why you called off the wedding?”
“Well, my sister knows. We’ll get there. Baby steps. They’re fragile creatures, and I’ve just destroyed their future plans for me.”
“Is it too soon for me to come?”
“No. I want them to meet you. I want you to meet them. I think it’s important to both of us. And I need to make this right with you.”
It was important to her, and she wanted to make it right too. That she couldn’t deny. Hope had been blooming in her chest since his text message had come in yesterday. She’d tried to see the situation with his family from his perspective, although it didn’t make sense to her. But maybe she was missing something. Maybe it was harder for him than she’d assumed. Maybe seeing his world would unlock something.
“Okay, I’ll come.” She sighed. Was this really the best thing to do? “Anyway, I’ve wanted to see those cool temples you’re always bragging about.”
She heard a noise in the background that sounded like a thud. Had he just jumped up and down? “Yes. Perfect. We’ll go. We’ll do it all.”
Rishi sounded so excited. But was she being beyond hopeful? Was she so lovesick that it was making her crazy? After all, he’d lied to her. Could they reconcile their differences? Could he finally stand up to his parents?
As Emma hung up the phone, she had to wonder if Rishi’s “all of it” included shattering his parents’ dreams forever.
Emma sat on the eight-hour bus ride to Madurai, traveling through city traffic jams; through small towns where cows, goats, and turkeys braved crossing the road; and along highways that were coated in shiny black asphalt, where the bus driver drove much too fast for comfort, zooming past the countryside. In the distance, women wearing bright saris were colorfully sprinkled throughout the rice fields, like the surprise of confetti across the green landscape.
What was going to happen when she got to Madurai? They’d talk, Rishi would apologize, and then . . . ? And what were his intentions? Was he just postponing the inevitable? Or did he think he and Emma would get married?
A small panic lit Emma’s skin on fire. But if she was being honest with herself, it wasn’t like she hadn’t thought about a future with him. She’d
envisioned what their children would look like. She’d imagined how they could work together. Whether they’d live in Seattle or Bangalore. It wasn’t like you could date someone endlessly when you had two different passports.
But what did she want?
She’d always imagined that her husband’s family would be her new family. Really, that had been the best part of being with Jeremy. Christmases and Thanksgivings with a bunch of people who treated her like she was one of them. And was that possible with Rishi’s family?
Something inside her said, I hope so.
When she arrived, Emma stood with her bag outside the station, looking for Rishi. Around her, hundreds of people shouted and moved about in such a tightly packed area that from above, the whole scene must have looked like cells dancing around in the small hole of a microscope.
The old Emma would have stayed put. Insisted that he come back to Bangalore so they could talk it out. And now she was alone, where no one was speaking English, and the idea of even finding Rishi seemed impossible.
A hand on her shoulder made her jump. She whipped around.
Rishi.
Just seeing the tentative smile on his face made her entire body melt. All of her relaxed. She wanted to collapse onto him, hold his chest to hers, and sink her head into his shoulder. But no. They hadn’t talked. It wasn’t right. Yet.
“I’m so glad to see you,” he said, grabbing her bag.
“Sure,” she said, a tight smile hiding all the emotions sifting through her mind.
“I booked you a room at a hotel nearby. Let’s go there and talk, and then we can go to my parents’ house. If that’s okay?” His eyes searched hers.
“That’s fine.” She wasn’t quite ready to let go of everything she’d been holding in.
They left the train station and made their way toward the hotel. Emma glanced around; to the left was a giant temple, a rainbow of carvings stretching toward the sky.
Her head swung around. To the right was another temple, colorful and just as tall, set farther in the distance. The buildings were all so low, and these colossal monuments to God were the only thing you could even pay attention to.
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