Barefoot on a Starlit Night

by Jo McNally

  “That was different.”

  “Was it, though?”

  Maura raised her hand. “Okay, we’re getting off track. We need to fix things with Finn and Bridget.”

  Cecile agreed. “We may not have hooked them up, but I’m sure we can get them back together. I mean, we are matchmakers, right? They’re a match. So let’s make it happen.”

  Lena looked between Vickie and Rick. “Isn’t Finn staying with you, Rick?” He nodded. “Well, then, it seems to me you’re the one to come up with a plan. You and Vickie.” Vickie started to object, but Lena waved her off. “Get over yourself. This is about two young people who need help figuring out they belong together. Come up with a plan, and we’ll put it in motion.”

  Rick looked like he wanted to be anywhere but there at the moment, but he heaved a loud sigh and looked over at Vickie. “You’re the one with all the acting chops, Miss Diva. Come up with a way to force them together.”

  Vickie pulled a small notebook from her purse with a wicked smile. “I’m on it. And you’re the literature professor, so write a story that will work. And make it a good one.”

  The group started to buzz with ideas. Maura watched and listened, praying this would work. Praying it wasn’t too late.

  CHAPTER TWENTY

  “I DON’T MIND having a roomie, but this black mood of yours is a real buzzkill, O’Hearn.” Rick Thomas set the containers of Chinese takeout on the table next to where Finn was glaring at his laptop. “Let’s see if some crab rangoon and sesame chicken can cheer you up.”

  Finn sat back and sighed. “Sorry, man. I know I’ve been foul since I got here.” He took a pint box and opened it, grabbing a crab rangoon and munching it down like a starving man. When was the last time he ate? Yesterday, maybe? “My head just won’t stop spinning in circles and it’s feckin’ exhausting.”

  Rick grabbed plates and silverware and joined Finn at the dining room table, which was pulling double duty as Finn’s office for now. Rick’s house was one of the smaller—and older—Victorian homes in Rendezvous Falls. It wasn’t far off Main Street, and now that summer was almost here, there was a steady stream of tourists going by on the weekends. The dining room had a bay window facing the street, so Finn could see a cluster of people out there now, pointing and taking photos of the yellow house with its green, orange and dark red trim work.

  It had a rounded tower on one corner with a cone-shaped roof on it, like an ice cream cone had been dropped there. The rainbow flag was hung on one side of the steps, with the American flag on the other. Rick didn’t talk about it much, but he’d served in the navy after high school and had gone to college on a military scholarship. The older man scooped some egg foo yong on his plate and covered it with an alarming amount of salty gravy.

  “It’s been a month, Finn. You need to figure your shit out.”

  “I told you I found a house. I’ll be out of here as soon as I sign the lease.”

  The beige 1960s ranch was further from town than he’d like, but it was cheap and available and partially furnished. And being more removed from the town meant fewer chances of running into Bridget or her family. He was persona non grata with most of them, and he missed the McKinnons. But nowhere near as much as he missed her.

  Rick waved his hand, chewing quickly so he could speak. “I’m not talking about that. I don’t care how long you stay here. And forget that dumpy house you looked at. It’s practically in the next town, and it’s...boring. It’s like you’re trying to punish yourself...” He grabbed a pot sticker from another container. “Are you punishing yourself, Finn?”

  “I don’t need a shrink for a landlord, Rick. I need my own place.”

  “You had a place. With Bridget McKinnon. From what I’ve heard, it’s still available.”

  “She won’t get much action on the apartment until August when students come back.”

  “I wasn’t talking about the apartment, dumbass. I’m talking about the place you still have in the woman’s heart. It’s not too late.”

  Oh, how he wished that were true. But he’d already hurt her badly, and would only do it again.

  There was a knock on the door as they started cleaning up. Sometimes tourists would be bold enough to knock and ask to see the interior of the private home. Finn thought it was a ballsy move to request access into a stranger’s house, but Rick would occasionally allow them to step into the ornate little foyer with its sparkling chandelier and large oil painting above the console table. The painting was from 1905, and showed the town as viewed from Seneca Lake, including some of the original college buildings. The painting was mentioned in the walking tour brochures handed out by the historical society. It was by a locally famous artist of the period, and had been a gift from a man Rick dated for years. Finn got the idea that guy was the One Who Got Away.

  Finn closed up the takeout boxes and put them in the fridge as Rick went to get the door. He heard low conversation in the other room, and figured some lucky tourists had been invited in. That was a good reason to stay in the kitchen. Or maybe head up to his room via the back staircase. Before he could decide, Rick stepped in and gestured for him to follow. Curious, Finn tossed a towel on the sink and went into the dining room.

  The table was now occupied by several of Rick’s book club friends. Finn met most of them at the engagement party at Maura’s house. Vickie. Cecile. Helen Russo from the winery. That night seemed like a lifetime ago. Kneeling in front of Bridget and sliding that ring on her finger. The kiss that rocked his world. The beginning of their fake engagement and very real love affair.

  He gave himself a mental shake and plastered on a smile.

  “Oh, I didn’t know there was a book club meeting today. I’ll just get of your hair...” He turned toward the foyer and came to an abrupt halt.

  Maura McKinnon stood in the archway leading into the dining room. He hadn’t seen her in over a month, and she looked...good. She had color in her cheeks and an energetic light in her eyes. Her head was covered with a scarf—green, of course—and she gave Finn a warm smile. Why wasn’t she glaring at him? He’d dumped her granddaughter. Broken off both the real and fake relationship.

  The whole McKinnon clan had been cool, at best, since the day Bridget called him a selfish coward and walked out of his life. Mary sent him a cryptic text uninviting him from Katie’s birthday party. He ran into Mike a few times in town, and Mike would just shake his head at him and walk away. Kelly was the most vocal. She’d seen him the day he moved his stuff out of Bridget’s house and walked across the parking lot to rip him a new one, right there in front of Rick and Luke Rutledge.

  She’d called him three kinds of an asshole for hurting her cousin, and banned him from the Shamrock. As if his heart could ever take walking in there again. Seeing Bridget. Remembering the night they made love against the wall in the back hallway. Kelly had nothing to worry about—the Shamrock was filled with nothing but pain for him.

  Yet here stood Maura. Smiling. He blinked a few times and stared at her without saying a word, unsure how to react. Why had Rick brought him in here? Was this some intervention or...

  Oh, shit. That’s exactly what this was. Bridget told him about this book club and its fondness for meddling in other people’s business. Finn glared at Rick, who looked a little guilty and a lot amused. Damn it. That boring ranch house outside of town was looking really good right about now.

  “Seriously?” Finn ground his words through clenched teeth. “You’re siccing the love brigade on me?”

  Cecile, the rounded blonde with a bright smile and a perpetually pink wardrobe, burst out laughing, nudging the tall black woman at her side. Lena had half a dozen earrings in one ear, and at least that many rings on her fingers and bangles on her wrist. Cecile clapped her hands in delight.

  “The Love Brigade! Oh, my God, that’s fabulous! Can we get T-shirts made? Come up with a logo for us, Lena. I th
ink we finally have a name for our book club.”

  Lena was pursing her lips, trying not to laugh, but she finally shook her head with a chuckle. “It is pretty catchy.”

  Rick started grumbling behind Finn. “I knew this was a bad idea. I never should have let you biddies talk me into this.”

  Vickie Something—Finn couldn’t recall her last name—sat up straight and angry. Finn remembered her now. She’d been with Greer at the Shamrock the night this whole mess got started. Great. She shook her finger in Rick’s direction. “Don’t play innocent for your friend, Rick Thomas. You’re the one who said the only place we were guaranteed to find him was here. Now will someone please get Maura a chair?”

  Finn turned to Maura, feeling like an idiot. “I’m sorry, Maura.” He pulled out a chair for her. “Have a seat. And honestly, I don’t blame you for wanting to let me have it, so go ahead.” She sat, wearing an odd, secretive smile. He rushed to fill in the silence when she still didn’t speak. “Tell me what a bastard I am. I deserve it. I hurt your girl, and I’ll stand here and take whatever you want to throw at me.”

  Cecile piped up. “Oh, did you hear that, Maura? He’s giving us permission to throw things. Would this candlestick do?” She lifted one of Rick’s heavy brass candlesticks from the center of the table, but Rick quickly grabbed it away from her.

  “No one’s doing any throwing in this house, you dingbat. The house and garden tour is coming up next month and I don’t want to be patching holes in the walls.”

  Vickie rolled her eyes at Cecile. “Maura didn’t come here to throw things.” She turned her gaze back to Finn, with very little warmth. “As tempting as it might be for some of us. You played us all for fools, Finn O’Hearn. Lying to Howard and carrying on this elaborate ruse just to keep your job. Dragging Bridget into it. You both have apologies to make for all the lies you told.”

  Finn glared at Rick. They knew about the engagement. Rick held up both hands and backed away.

  “I didn’t tell them! I mean...not until Maura already knew something was going on. Seriously, you try lying to that woman.” He gestured toward Maura. “And trust me, I’m in the doghouse for not letting them know before they figured it out for themselves.”

  Vickie huffed out a grumbling sigh. “You’re going to be groveling a long time before I forgive you for lying to me. I can’t believe you kept it a sec... Oh, never mind.” She waved her hand. “We’ll deal with you later. Today is for Maura, and so far we haven’t let her speak a word.”

  The fact that this ambush was Maura’s idea didn’t bode well for Finn. She was the one he’d hurt the most. Besides Bridget, of course. He closed his eyes tight, then took a seat next to her, turning his chair to face her.

  “Let me explain...”

  She shook her head and spoke at last.

  “Bridget explained everything to me. I knew there was something off with the story right from the start.” She paused. “But I let it go when I saw it might become the truth. You started to fall in love for real after the St. Paddy’s party.”

  A flood of memories washed over him. Making love in the hall. Going back to his bed for the rest of the night. And the next night. And all the nights after that. The laughter. The sex. The love. He couldn’t imagine ever not loving Bridget. But it was too late now.

  “Maura, I’m sorry. I screwed up my life, which is a particular talent of mine. But this time I screwed up someone else’s life, too, and I hurt your family with all the lies. That’s on me, not Bridget.” He stared at the floor, focusing on the frayed edge of the dark red antique rug against the highly polished hardwood floor. “And yes, I fell in love with her. Don’t you see? It’s because I love her that I had to break things off...”

  Snickers and outright laughter broke out around the table. He looked up in surprise. Even Maura was chuckling at him.

  “I know you probably think that’s true, but it’s a load of horse shit, Finn.”

  He couldn’t help his sad smile.

  “That’s pretty much what Bridget said at the time.”

  Maura nodded. “I raised a smart girl.” She winked at him. “Look, we’re laughing because we’ve seen this before. This idea that breaking someone’s heart is somehow the brave and noble thing to do. Come on. You’re a smart man. Smart enough to know you aren’t doing this for Bridget’s sake, no matter how many times you tell yourself that story.”

  He sat back and closed his eyes. Why couldn’t anyone understand? “No offense, Maura, but it’s the truth. I’m terrified of hurting her if we...”

  “A-ha!” She held up a finger and pointed it right at his face. “There’s a bit of truth at last. You’re terrified. You’re so wrapped up in ‘what-ifs’ that you won’t let yourself take a chance. The only one you’re protecting here is you. The only one you’re punishing here is you. You love that woman, and she loves you.” Her voice hardened. “So do something about it.”

  “Damn it, Maura, I’ve already broken it off! Do you really think Bridget is going to just shrug that off and take me back? She was furious, and I don’t think that’s changed.”

  “She was hurt, Finn.” It was Helen who spoke up. “Hurt and rage can look alike, but they’re not. Hurt can be healed.” She hesitated. “I understand what you’re doing. Whether it’s Bridget or yourself you’re trying to protect, you’re refusing to let love into your life. And that’s always a mistake. Losing my Tony a few years back nearly destroyed me. I almost lost the winery because I was in so much pain that I stopped functioning. We were supposed to have so many more years left to enjoy together, and he was gone in the blink of an eye. But I wouldn’t trade my time with him for the world.” She waved her arm around the table. “And I’m not the only widow sitting here. Lena lost her husband when their children were babies. Lena, would you give up your time together to protect yourself from the pain?”

  Lena scoffed. “Hell, no. My years with Marcus were the best years of my life.”

  “See?” Helen looked back to Finn. “Love brings risks. And plenty of opportunities for pain. And anger. Lord knows, Tony and I had more than one big blow-out through the years.” Heads nodded. “Tears were shed. Hearts were hurt. But to refuse to even try when you have a chance for a love like that? Oh, honey, you’re both making a big mistake here.”

  Cecile fluffed her bright blond hair and cleared her throat loudly. She was a colorful one, with powder-blue eye shadow and sparkly eyelashes in the middle of the afternoon. But her smile was warm and sincere.

  “My Charlie and I are still happily and thankfully together, and our marriage is blissfully happy.” Vickie rolled her eyes, but Cecile just shrugged. “It’s true! But what I’m trying to say is that it isn’t all sunshine and roses. We almost split up about twelve years ago.” There were a few gasps. “Seriously! As we got older, things got more...challenging...intimacy-wise. We both thought the other had lost interest. We doubted each other and we were hurt and angry. Right in the middle of our biggest argument ever, we realized we were just heaping assumptions and fear on each other with no actual conversation. Once we talked it out...” She blushed slightly, but Finn had no idea why until she continued. “...and got more creative with our sex life...”

  “Okay,” Lena said. “Moving right along...”

  Cecile rushed to speak over her. “My point is that talking and trusting and saying you’re sorry can go a long way. And getting creative, of course.”

  Finn had no idea where this conversation was going, or why.

  “Ladies...” He glanced up at his current landlord. “And gentleman, I appreciate whatever it is you’re trying to do here, but Bridget and I are over.” Those words felt heavy on his heart. “We built our relationship on a lie.”

  “So rebuild it.” Maura’s words were soft and low, but opened a spot in Finn’s heart he thought was permanently sealed off. The spot where hope lived.

  “Rebui
ld?” Was that possible?

  “You’re pretty determined that what you had was bad,” Maura continued. “Tainted by the fake engagement story. Your job stress. Your divorce. My illness and its effect on Bridget. Your breakup.” She reached out and put her hand over Finn’s. “If you’re really convinced all of that makes things impossible to repair, then don’t repair it. Start fresh. Leave all the baggage behind. Tell her you love her—or better yet, show her you love her. And begin your own story together. A real one.”

  He sat in silence, considering Maura’s suggestion. He and Bridget had started under a heavy load of stress. They helped each other, but maybe they gave too much? No, not too much. Love was never too much. But neither of them had let go of their fear to look ahead with clear eyes. No, that wasn’t true, either. He was the only one still hobbled by his past, by his fears. Bridget had moved beyond hers. She’d been willing to take the chance with him. And he’d pushed her away.

  The fog lifted. Bridget had been hurt in the past. Taken for granted. And she’d risen above it and handed her heart to Finn. His head dropped into his hands. He was such a stupid, chickenshit asshole.

  There were chuckles around the room, and Maura was laughing out loud.

  “Well, I wasn’t going to use those exact words, but yes.”

  He realized he’d stated his confession out loud. His face heated, and Rick clapped his hand on Finn’s shoulder.

  “Sometimes the truth hurts. But you know what they say—the first step to recovery is admitting you have a problem.”

  “Yeah? Then what’s the second step? Because I have no clue what to do.”

  Cecile raised her glass of wine. “Don’t you worry, Finn O’Hearn. That’s what the Love Brigade is here for!”

  * * *

  BRIDGET DIDN’T REALIZE how much effort she was putting into scrubbing the top of the skillet surface until Kelly spoke up from in front of the sink.

  “Are you trying to clean that thing or kill it?”