“I do know how to cook, thank you very much! It’s just crispy—It’s meant to have black lines!”
“You’ve charred the whole thing, not just parts of it! If I wanted to eat charcoal, I’d grab a piece. How are we meant to enjoy that garbage?” Rebecca points to the piece of steak on the grill.
Sophie snickers as we watch Rebecca jump, trying to snatch the tools from Nic’s hand.
Walking over to them, I lean in close to Nic. “What kind of grown-ass man fights with children?” I snatch the tongs from his hand as he spins around.
His mouth falls open. “What the hell, man? You don’t sneak up to a guy with tongs! I could have seriously hurt you!”
“With a pair of tongs?” I grin at him, waving them in front of his face. He looks at his empty hand, only now realizing I’d snatched them.
He glares and the girls laugh as Nic flips me the bird. “Just for that, you’re not having any of my home-made potato bake.”
I chuckle, shoving him to the side so I can step in front of the burning—literally—grill. “I’ve seen your cooking and I’ve experienced the poisonous aftermath. I’m pretty sure I can survive without it.”
The man’s last cooking attempt had me racing home so that I could experience what shitting through the eye of a needle felt like. I cringe at the memory, but Nic shrugs. “Whatever. You guys will eat it, right?”
He turns to the girls, but they shake their heads furiously, their wide-eyed stares implying they’ve been victims of Nic’s cooking before. How long have they all known each other? And why haven’t I heard of anyone before? We’ve been friends for so long… At least, I thought we were.
I turn to the barbecue, flipping the steaks to see the severely charred side. “So, how long have you all known each other?”
Nic takes off the apron, revealing a pair of dark denim jeans and a navy polo shirt. “Ah, probably two years? Is that right?”
The girls nod their heads. “I think so,” says Sophie. “I think the first time we met was Ellie’s birthday; we had that big surprise party.”
“Oh, wow. Yeah, I think it was. Awesome memory, squirt!”
The youngest girl blushes.
“So, you guys all come together for holidays and stuff?” I ask, rubbing my eyes of the blistering heat in front of me.
“Sometimes,” Nic says, leaning against the brick wall beside the barbecue to watch me. “We try to catch up all together at least once a month. I know Ellie is here a lot. Or she’s at the bakery. I’ve never met a girl who can eat as much shit as her and not gain any weight. Me? I smell a cupcake five-miles away and it goes straight to my belly,” he slaps his hands against his non-existent flab, and I smirk.
I turn back to the grill and move a few steaks onto the waiting plates, wiping at the sweat beading on my forehead.
“—her self-defense classes.”
I lift my head, turning to the two young girls on my other side. “Huh? What about self-defense classes?”
Sophie rolls her eyes dramatically toward her sister. “Geez. Guys really don’t listen, do they?”
“Tell me about it. Mom was right—if you haven’t repeated yourself five times, they haven’t heard you.”
“Even if they insist they have…”
“Hey, I did hear. Just not—” The sisters pierce me with a gaze that makes me stop, and I shrug, scratching at the back of my neck. “Er, who goes to self-defense classes?”
“Ellie goes to self-defense classes almost every day,” Rebecca says. “We see her in the adult classes while we take the under eighteen class.”
I nod. I’m not surprised to hear that Ellie does self-defense—I’m glad, in fact. But I look at the two small redheads in front of me and tilt my head. “You’re, what, 12 and 15, right? Why do you guys go to those classes?”
“They’re 13 and 16, and they go because I make them.”
Paul strides closer, his presence stealing the calm. Peering at the barbecue, his gaze turns to Nic who’s looking anywhere but at Paul.
“The one time I trust you to cook the steaks, and you kill them? And you wonder why I don’t ever let you cook.” Paul shakes his head, and the girls laugh.
Pulling the rest of the blackened steaks from the grill, I add the next batch of raw slabs, the sizzling soothing my nerves. Everyone is so close. It’s like they’ve known each other for their entire lives. And I’m the new guy—the odd one out.
Ellie’s laugh rings out across the yard, and a sense of calmness washes through me. My lips twitch into a smile, the movement going unnoticed by Paul.
“Girls… Nic. Why don’t you go help your mom?”
“But—”
Paul’s glare turns on his eldest daughter. Grumbling, the girls follow their dad’s request and chat among themselves as they disappear into the yard. But Nic hangs back, worry forming on his face. Paul raises a placating hand which seems to calm Nic enough for him to turn and follow after the sisters.
Once they’re out of sight, Paul leans against the wall of the house, his face growing stern and my stomach falls as I expect the worst.
“I don’t know you, but if you’re going to be with Ellie, then you need to know a few things.” He huffs out a short laugh before shaking his head. “Ellie would kill me if she found out, but if you want to be in her life, then you need to be man enough to accept her—flaws and all. And if you’re the man I hope you are, you need to understand her. She may not be my daughter by blood, but she’s become a daughter of my heart.
“I make the girls go because they need to defend themselves, they need to learn how to get out of tough situations. I don’t think they took it seriously until they met Ellie.” Paul smiles softly. “We weren’t planning on telling them anything… We didn’t want to hurt Ellie, and we didn’t want to scare the girls.”
I flip the steaks, hearing the sizzle of the meat cooking. My chest tightens at his words.
“We’d gone for a family trip to the beach. It was the very first one we’d taken as a family with these ruffians.” He gestures to Nic, Katie, and Mia across the yard. “It wasn’t until Ellie was lounging with Mia and Katie that the girls noticed her scars; they were still pretty noticeable then. Ellie sat them down and simply said that a bad man had hurt her and that her friends came in and saved the day.
“She explained that these classes made her feel strong and less like a victim. And that they should learn everything they can to help themselves if they ever find themselves in a bad situation. And if they ever found themselves in a bad place to call her, me, or anyone else, and we’d be there in a heartbeat.”
Taking a deep breath, Paul continues. “I waited for the girls to leave before crying. I know that it’s not manly to admit it, but I did. I cried for what Ellie had to experience. I cried for her being brave enough to share her story, if only a little. And I cried for how, even though she hadn’t really gotten to know us as well as she does now, she offered to be there for my girls if they ever needed it. From that day, Ellie truly became one of the family. Once the girls heard what had happened to her, they took their self-defense classes more seriously and I couldn’t be more thankful to Ellie for that. There’s nothing worse than the thought of your children hurting or being hurt.”
And this is why I will never have kids. I’ll either abandon them like my dad did, or something bad will happen to them. It’s better to live my life alone. My gaze unwillingly drifts to the back of the house where Ellie stands chatting with Betty. Does she want more from me? Does she want kids? I picture Ellie cradling a baby in her arms. The image slicing my heart open. Of course she does. Someone like Ellie would thrive as a mom. But me? I could never be a dad.
“I know my wife gave you the ‘if you hurt her speech’, so I know I don’t have to repeat it. But if you’re just looking for a fling or a friend with benefits, find another woman. Ellie’s too good for that and deserves better.”
He’s right. “I know. She deserves the world.” And I can’t give her that,
can I? What if I turn out like my father? Abandoning her? I can’t do that to Ellie. I can only give her now.
Turning back to the steaks, I pull them off the pit before shutting the flames off, my mind and heart in turmoil. I take the trays, heading toward the back yard where Ellie, Mia, Katie, and Betty are sitting at the table, laughing as Mia gestures wildly. Jake sits by her side, doing his best to keep up with the young sisters’ conversation.
Seeing Ellie here, happy and laughing with her family and friends, sends a punch to my stomach. She deserves better. Someone who hasn’t been through what I have. Someone who can only give her the sun. Not the moon.
“The steaks are finally done. Full disclosure: Nic cooked about half of them, and they’re blacker charcoal, so maybe avoid those.” Placing the tray next to the rows of food, I turn back to the table, my eyes focused solely on Ellie.
With the craziness of the morning, I never really took time to appreciate how beautiful she looks. Her hair is pulled up into a messy bun; a few stands fan out, framing her face. She’s applied a little makeup, making her skin glow, and her dark jeans and floral blouse compliment her fair skin. She looks beautiful. Not in a glamorous, over-the-top, kind of way, but in an elegant, natural way.
“Alright, everyone. Dig in. This food isn’t going to eat itself. Nic also cooked the potato bake, so eat at your own risk.” Grabbing a plate from the table, Paul heads to the buffet as everyone snickers at Nic’s pout.
Sliding into the line behind Nic, I pile food onto my plate, watching as everyone skips Nic’s dish. Except for Ellie who takes a small scoop.
“I’m sure it’s not that bad.” Ellie shrugs at Nic’s wide-eyes.
“Maybe you shouldn’t eat it, Ellie. God knows Mia and I can’t cook to save our lives.”
Shaking her head, she continues through the line: “If you took the time to make it, I can take the time to eat it. And if I get food poisoning, you’re bringing me ginger biscuits and flat lemonade.” She smiles, patting his arm as she makes her way back to the table.
“You’re a lucky man, Garrett. Don’t fuck it up.” Nic whispers as he follows her.
Jesus. How many more warnings can I get?
“Ah, Garrett?”
Spoke too soon. Twisting around, Katie stands in front of me, nervously biting her lip. I almost sigh as I say, “Yeah?”
“I know you’ve probably heard a lot of warnings and threats today—” I laugh, “—but I wanted to say thank you. I haven’t seen Ellie this happy or relaxed in a long time. It’s nice to see pieces of our old Ellie, mixed with our new Ellie. And I think it has everything to do with you. So, I just wanted to say thank you. You’re good for her. And I’m glad she has you in her life.” Katie blushes before scurrying away from my stunned expression.
Taking my plate, I sit down next to Ellie as everyone chatters around the table. Paul bangs the base of his knife against the wood, attracting everyone’s attention. The chattering quietens.
“I know I say this every time we come together, but we love each and every one of you, and we’re thankful to have you in our lives. It’s days like today that we truly appreciate having everyone in one place to enjoy great food and even greater company. Now let’s dig in!”
At Paul’s words, everyone begins to eat, the chatter stopping as everyone enjoys their food.
“Sorry for leaving you alone,” Ellie leans in close to me. “Are you enjoying the barbecue?”
“It’s okay, you had to catch up with everyone. I’m glad to see you’re having a great time.” And I mean it.
“I’m really glad you decided to come with me today. It’s… nice.” Ellie’s face flushes and she resorts to pushing way too much potato bake onto her fork.
“I’m glad I came too. I’ve gained new insight into how I could be disposed of. It’s been… enlightening.”
Ellie grimaces. “I’m so sorry about that. I don’t think she really meant it. She’s too sweet.”
“Yeah, you say that…” I’m one hundred percent certain she could and would. “How are the potatoes?”
Ellie cringes as she takes a look at her half eaten pile of potato bake. “It’s not bad… I think he put too much salt in it. Don’t get me wrong, I love my salt, but an entire ocean’s worth?”
Scooping up a piece from her plate, I pop it in my mouth, chewing slowly, before swallowing. Oh God. Grabbing a napkin, I spit the remainder of potato out, my throat opening and closing as I try not to vomit. “Oh, God. Ellie, stop eating that.” I pick up my glass of water, downing the entire contents in a few seconds.
“It wasn’t that bad.”
“It wasn’t that bad? Are you kidding?” Grabbing the water jug, I fill her glass and mine before draining it once more. “God, how are you so calm right now?” I stare at her as she smugly sips from her glass.
“I’ve got a rock hard stomach. Besides, Nic has been trying to cook for us most of my life. And Mia’s not any better. You get used to it.” Shrugging, Ellie continues to eat, this time leaving the pile of potatoes untouched.
Moving my head slowly around the table, everyone is staring at us with a mixture of bemusement and barely contained laughter. Stopping at Nic, I glare at him. “And you. No more cooking. Ever. Unless you take some classes and stop trying to kill everyone.”
“It isn’t that terrible.” Nic grumbles, glaring at the pile of potatoes on his plate.
Betty rests her face in her palm as her body shakes with laughter. Lifting her head, she smiles around the table. “I don’t think I’ve laughed this hard in years.”
She stands and begins clearing away the plates with the help of the girls.
“Should we go and help?” I ask, watching them head up the steps into the house. Sophie teeters, and the stack of glasses in her hand wobbles precariously.
But Paul and Nic shake their heads. “No. If we try to help, we’re in the way. If we insist we do it alone, it isn’t done ‘properly’,” Nic says.
“About a year ago, after a yelling match between that buffoon and Mia,” Paul says, gesturing to Nic, “we decided to flip a coin to see who would set up the barbecue and who would clear it away. We have the duty of setting the tables and laying everything out, and the girls have the job of clearing it away.”
That explains why Betty was straightening the table when we arrived and why she suddenly stopped when Paul came over.
“They think we don’t see them changing our tablecloths or straightening the centerpieces, and they turn a blind eye when we pack away the chairs and tables at the end of the night. It’s not perfect, but that’s just the way we like it.”
We sit in silence, the cool, late-afternoon breeze brushing past us.
“We come bearing dessert!” Katie shouts, dropping the large tub of ice cream onto the table as the girls place the bowls and spoons gently next to it.
“And I have cheesecake.” Ellie steps to the other side of the table, revealing the most delicious-looking cheesecake I’ve ever seen with crumbled cookies on top and the thickest mounds of whipped cream possible. Taking a knife, she efficiently slices the cake into ten pieces before dishing them out into the bowls.
Katie scoops out large balls of ice cream, plopping them next to the slices of cake, and Mia hands each person a bowl and spoon. After a few minutes, Ellie takes her seat next to me with a satisfied sigh.
“Dig in everyone!” she calls, already shoveling her first bite. Murmurs of appreciation echo around the backyard, and I stare down at the bowl. The cake does look good, but I’ve never seen Ellie cook for anyone other than Georgie.
I take a tentative bite.
Holy mother of God. The subtle flavor of mint blends into the creaminess of the cake. The base hits my taste buds second, cutting through the richness with the sharp cocoa of dark chocolate with a hint of salt. How the hell did she do that? It’s the perfect combination.
Glancing at Ellie, I notice that she’s watching me, waiting for my reaction.
“You made this?”
“Um. Yes?”
“Like, you actually went to the store, picked up the ingredients, and made it from scratch?”
She looks across at me with one eyebrow raised. “Yes, I believe that’s what ‘making it’ means, Garrett.”
“But… how? You don’t cook. I mean, you cook for Georgie. But I’ve never seen you actually… cook.”
Mia snorts. “After Ellie came to live with us, Nic took it upon himself to cook for us because our parents were too busy working. He claimed to be the man of the house and it was his job to take care of the women.” At her words, Nic smiles, a red tinge flushing his cheeks.
“After many cases of food poisoning,” Mia smirks, “we told Nic that if he didn’t stop, we’d probably end up dead. I tried, but I was just as bad,” she admits. “I don’t know how we never ended up with serious stomach problems, but cooking was not for me. So Ellie decided to give it a shot. We figured there’d be no way that she could be worse than Nic or myself. God, we were so right.” She smiles softly. “If it wasn’t for Ellie, I’m pretty sure we would have all starved.”
“You’re only saying that because I threatened to take away your piece of the cheesecake,” Ellie says, grinning.
What would it have been like to grow up with a brother? Or a sister? I push my dessert around my plate, my heart heavier than it has been in a long time.
“Maybe? But it’s still true. I’d bottle the smell of cake and wear it as a perfume if I could. There’s nothing that smells better—or more inviting,” Mia sighs, her body relaxing at the thought as she slumps into her chair.
Nic snickers. “Maybe you should make that as a perfume. They say chocolate is an aphrodisiac, and God knows you need a man.”
Mia swats him in the arm before raising her head. “I don’t need a man, thank you very much.”
The two continue to bicker, their antics not unknown to the group as they either laugh or continue to enjoy their dessert and the company. How much have I missed out on by shutting myself off?
“Ellie has literally been a godsend. Whenever I’m short-staffed or need an extra hand during the holiday seasons, she’s always there, willing to help,” Betty gushes.
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