RUIN: A M/M Romance Novel

by Daya Daniels

  Pierce stands off to the side, holding a stack of files in his hands.

  Uncle Xavier sits behind his desk.

  Baby stands in front of it. “Just tell me why, please.”

  Uncle Xavier sighs.

  “I just want to understand.” He wipes his wet cheeks.

  I shift uncomfortably where I stand and gaze out the window sinking into the view of the Hudson River this time of the evening. The sky above is gray and white snow falls down in a diagonal sort of way making everything look so beautiful.

  Uncle Xavier pulls a handkerchief from his pocket and blows his nose. He hasn’t shed a tear yet. Not as many as Baby has in all these years of enduring his abuse.

  “You’re a gay man, Dad, yourself!” Baby slams a fist down on the desk. “So please explain to me how…just whyyyyyy would you beat me because I’m gay?”

  Pierce remains stone-faced. He’s on high alert.

  As am I.

  Thank God the windows in here don’t open because something about the look on my uncle Xavier’s face tells me he’d likely leap out of one if they did.

  “Do you know how many broken ribs I’ve had, broken bones, busted lips, bruises, punctures, scratches, scrapes, and scars you’ve left me with because of your temper!” He points to his elbow where a large scar remains. “I got this when you pushed me down the stairs after delivering quite a vicious roundhouse kick to my chest. Do you remember that?”

  God, this is a shit storm.

  “No,” Uncle Xavier says softly.

  Baby scoffs and then he laughs hysterically. “I have suffered believe me. I have suffered so much at the hands of you because you hate me.”

  “I—I—I don’t hate you, Baby. I’ve never hated you.” Uncle Xavier massages his temples. “You don’t understand?”

  Baby’s face flares red. “Well, make me understand then because I don’t fucking get it! All this hypocrisy is disgusting. You think you are better because you hide what you do, when in fact you are just worse!”

  “Please, please, please.” Uncle Xavier searches for his words. “I guess I didn’t want you to be like me, Baby.” He sucks in a shaky breath. “My entire life they told me it was wrong, that I was disgusting and that I’d burn in Hell because I was going against the way of God.” He weeps. “I was just trying to protect you. I didn’t mean to hurt you. I truly didn’t.”

  Pierce presses his lips together. “My father said the two of you are still together.”

  Uncle Xavier nods. “Yes, that is true.”

  Pierce ambles over to the desk and drops the stack of papers down. “And that means that you will support Baby from now on in everything and anything he decides to do.”

  “Yes.” Uncle Xavier nods.

  Baby wipes his tears.

  “What do you want?” Uncle Xavier directs the question to Baby.

  Baby breathes. “I want everything you have.”

  Pierce sifts through the pages and pulls out a booklet that’s edged with yellow signature tabs. “We will give you a day to review the attached.” There is zero emotion in his voice. “It outlines ownership of a number of your companies. It includes share percentages and stock prices. A list of properties which Baby would also like to have are included…”

  I take a seat in one of the plush chairs.

  “I would suggest you have one of your lawyers look this over,” Pierce suggests. “But it doesn’t matter what they recommend, you will need to sign it or what comes after will be far worse than this little intervention we have going on here.” Pierce offers up a mega-watt smile.

  Nodding, Uncle Xavier stands shakily and retrieves the pages.

  He looks as though he’s going to pass out.

  But, as we know evil doesn’t die. It tends to live forever. And it’ll be a long, long time before this old man ever drops dead.

  “I’ll have all these documents back to you this evening.” Uncle Xavier exhales.

  Pierce pulls Baby into his chest and holds him close.

  Uncle Xavier heads out of the room but stops when he makes it to the doorway. “I’m truly sorry, Baby. I thought I was doing what was best for you and your mother and myself. You will never understand.”

  Because it doesn’t make any fucking sense.

  Baby says nothing.

  “Nothing will make anything you’ve done to me ever okay. But if you truly mean what you say, you will sign those papers.”

  Uncle Xavier nods. “Yes, okay.”

  I plop down into one of the plush leather chairs unable to believe what I’m witnessing. Xavier Benedict pushed to silence and cowering to men half his age. They own him. His dick. His balls. His wallet. And Uncle Xavier fucking knows it.

  I scrub at the stubble along my jawline.

  Uncle Xavier stops in his stride. His face is pained as he glances over his shoulder at Pierce and Baby. “And this remains completely confidential.”

  Laughing, Pierce shakes his head. “Yes, Xavier, it will all be confidential. The world will never know you are a gay man.”

  Uncle Xavier tips his chin high. “Thank you.”

  Sigh.

  Baby wipes his eyes and saunters across the room to me. His eyes flicker all over my face and when they hit where my hand rests, I snatch it up and shove it in my pocket. Pierce stands next to him.

  “What happened to your wrist?” Pierce’s gray eyes search my face.

  I shrug. “The usual.” I don’t bother to lie.

  Pierce exhales softly and gazes out the large window behind me. “You know it would make things much easier to dethrone your father if you told me exactly what it is you have over his head.”

  Never.

  I fix my eyes on the shiny wooden floors near my boots. “It doesn’t matter.” I look back at him.

  Pierce squares his jaw. “Did you and Griffon break up?”

  I lift a shoulder. “I don’t know.” It’s the most honest answer I can give.

  “He hasn’t been to work.” Baby folds his arms across his chest. “He told me he needed some time off to take care of Elsa.”

  Bullshit.

  “And he hasn’t contacted me since.” Baby’s nose wrinkles.

  “Okay, then, well…” I gesture with my hand and then let it rest on my thigh once more.

  “I hope you both work out whatever’s going on.” Pierce snatches up his briefcase.

  Yeah, me too, but it’s unlikely.

  “And what do you think about the apartment in the Flat Iron District?” Pierce asks.

  I smile thinking about the place I’d scoped out a few days ago. Pierce handled the rest. So now I owe him three point five million dollars which I should have in my bank account very shortly. I also owe him fifty grand for the furniture I’d purchased. Yesterday, I collected the keys to my new place, so I’d already spent one very sleepless night in it.

  It’s a large but modest-style, top-floor apartment in a new building. It has two bedrooms, two and a half baths, a library, and a small terrace garden. It’s perfect.

  Finally, I have somewhere to call my own.

  And I don’t have to look at those creepy clowns anymore.

  “I love it. I can’t wait to move into it which I plan to do tonight.” I clap my hands and rub them together vigorously.

  “Good, good.” Pierce reaches out.

  We shake hands.

  “We should get going.” Pierce nudges his chin in the direction of the doors.

  Baby grooms his blond locks with his fingers. “Well, today is the day.”

  “Yes,” I whisper.

  “Xavier Benedict’s legacy is yours now, Baby.” Pierce presses a kiss to Baby’s lips.

  Baby laughs.

  I grin, big, wide, and white.

  “Yeah, no sense waiting for a man to die before you can get your justice,” Baby says.

  My eyes narrow. “Because delayed justice is no justice at all.”

  Baby points a finger in my direction and smiles.

  I stand, f
eeling so excited, I’m almost hard.

  One king down, one more to go.

  ~

  A FEW HOURS LATER…

  I toss my keys on the countertop just when the door slams. The pungent scent of empty apartment hits my nostrils.

  And the events of the day couldn’t have gone more awry.

  Everything was fucked but not in the way you might think.

  I flick on a few lights which illuminate the galley-style kitchen that opens up to the living room. It shines along the wooden floors and over the furniture which is still covered in plastic. In the bedroom is one queen-size bed and nothing else.

  I’ve lain in it. It’s comfortable and covered in a white comforter.

  What else could a boy ever need?

  Shoving my fingers into my hair, I catch my reflection in the glass-front cabinets.

  I look exhausted. I am exhausted along with very fucking confused.

  The clock just above the Sub-Zero tells me it’s just after midnight which makes it all official. I’m no longer a boy. I’m twenty-one years old now.

  I am a man.

  My own man.

  I tap on Richard II, admiring the cover. After I place it on an empty shelf just above the dishwasher, I stand in the kitchen for a long while just looking around, accepting I’ll be living here for quite a while.

  Luis Caballero’s Nu masculin—all ten paintings—adorn three of the walls in here.

  For a beat, I admire the replicas, then breathe.

  In the last few hours, everything had changed.

  I’d officially left that Upper West Side address.

  Bella is now in rehab under the care of Doctor Azad.

  I fired Trinity.

  And Francis…

  Reaching for the remote, I point it at the iPod dock which rests on the granite countertops. It comes alive, filling this loft apartment with Pink Floyd’s “Welcome to the Machine.” Dropping my head, I allow the tune to float into my ears for a moment and then soon I’m scanning the place again.

  Tomorrow, the cabinets and drawers will be filled with dishes, cutlery, and food. I decided I’m going to go shopping too and attempt to make this apartment more like a home and less like the bachelor pad which it currently is.

  I think about how empty it is.

  I think about my appointment with Doctor Azad tomorrow morning since I had the courage to tell him I still needed him in my life to which he agreed. I didn’t believe it before, but he was right when he said that recovery is an ongoing process. It isn’t something that happens overnight and that you can relapse in many different ways.

  Pulling up my sleeves, I examine the healing wounds on my arms.

  Then, I think about Griffon and how if he had been near me I probably wouldn’t have done it. I would’ve buried my face in his neck and inhaled the spicy cotton scent of his skin. And he would’ve told me he loved me and that I was perfect and hot and all those sweet things lovers tell each other.

  But Griffon was gone.

  Griffon-is-gone.

  “Fuck.” I pull my phone out of my pocket when it buzzes.

  Baby: I’m sorry things didn’t go the way you wanted them to.

  Me: Yeah, me too.

  Baby: But at least you don’t have to worry about Francis anymore.

  Me: Yeah.

  Baby: How long a time lies in one little word! Four lagging winters and four long wanton springs. End in a word; such is the breath of kings!

  I smile at the words he’d tapped out. “Yeah.”

  Baby: You are the king now. The way it should’ve always been.

  Me: And the kingdom needs to be rebuilt from the ground up.

  Baby: Yes, it does, and now we have ample time to get started.

  Xavier’s and Francis’ companies and pending ventures were all somehow tied up together. In discussions, with Pierce and Baby and two of the Benedict family’s top financial advisors, we’d spend the next few months untying a few of those deals and amalgamating the rest so that they all fall beneath one umbrella.

  Baby would be reorganizing his father’s law firm.

  I plan to remain at NYU, but after I graduate, which seems as though it’ll be a thousand years from now, I plan to head directly to law school.

  But first, I need to get my shit together.

  I huff.

  Reaching for the empty pizza box on the counter, I move to toss it in the garbage can but find it’s full. I sigh then pull the entire thing out of the cabinet that conceals it and realize that in all the fuss with this move, I’d managed to fill the entire thing up with boxes and papers and all sorts of things I didn’t need anymore.

  I wrangle the bag out of the metal bin and set it to the side.

  I’d need to find my own dinner again tonight.

  There’s a Chinese food joint close by…

  I shut off the lights.

  And in less than a few seconds, I’m out the door and heading down the stairs, taking each one slowly. I drag the trash bag out, toss it to the curb and look around.

  The cool breeze washes over me.

  The lightly snow-covered streets are dotted with humans. Cars pass by. Sirens whir. The distant chatter coming from the people huddled on the stoop across the street fills my head and so do the Marlboros they must be smoking which I’d quit what feels like a lifetime ago.

  I pull my jacket closed tighter when the chill hits me.

  Glancing both ways, I decide it’s too fucking cold to be walking anywhere tonight so I’ll call for delivery. I head back inside the building, not bothering with the elevator. I toss a wave to the dude behind the security desk who has his head buried in The Advocate then take the stairs.

  I spear my key into the door then twist. As soon as I make it inside, I yank off my jacket and toss it on the counter. When I spin around, my heart almost ceases up.

  CHAPTER NINE

  GRIFFON

  “YOUR ‘CREEPER IN THE dark’ factor is mighty fucking high, Griffon.” Ryker presses a hand to his chest, then drags his fingers through his hair. “How in the fuck did you get in here?” His eyes flit around the space, searching for the answer to his question.

  I shove my hands into the pockets of my hoodie and take a few steps toward him. “I’m sorry. I didn’t mean to scare you.”

  His blue eyes blaze in my direction.

  He breathes.

  I do the same.

  He looks well-rested and just maybe a little sad.

  The jangle of Elsa’s collar echoes throughout this large room.

  A big smile hits Ryker’s face when he sees her. He wastes no time scooping her up in his arms and peppering kisses all over her face. “Hey, girl. I missed you so much.”

  Elsa wriggles in his arms and licks his face all over.

  I smile.

  Leaving them to it, I walk around a bit using the moonlight that shines in through the windows as my guide to maneuver around the furniture in here.

  “Your new place.” I touch one of the leather sofas.

  “Yeah.” He rummages around in the kitchen and gives Elsa food and water.

  She laps everything up quickly while Ryker pets her and when she’s done she scampers off down the hallway.

  Peeling off my hoodie, I toss it over the sofa.

  Ryker stands.

  I remain still and wait for him to approach.

  He shoves his hands into his pockets keeping his head low. His hair tickles his lashes and his blues hold me captive as they always do. Beneath this light, he looks edible.

  “Your birthday is tomorrow.” His deep voice cuts through the quiet air.

  “Yeah, I know.” I knead into the back of my neck with my fingers.

  We stare at each other for a while.

  It’s a bit awkward with neither of us knowing what to say.

  With a sigh, Ryker gazes out the window. “I’m really sorry.”

  “Yeah, me too.”

  His bottom lip quivers. “I wanted to explain everything to
you.” His eyes shine beneath the moonlight. “Everything.” He barely gets the word out. “But, I just couldn’t.”

  I reach for his hand, getting in his space, hating the way he can’t look me in the eye. I palm his cheek, guiding his eyes to mine. Tears quickly soak his warm cheeks.

  I swallow hard.

  He does the same.

  My eyes narrow. “All those stories you told me back at Spero…”

  He sucks in air with desperate gasps.

  I barely get the words out. “Some of them were true.”

  He nods very slowly. “Yes.”

  More tears fall. His and mine.

  I kiss his lips softly, missing the taste and feeling of them against mine. His salty tears drift over my tongue. I kiss him harder, swallowing them all down and then lick them away from his skin.

  I pull him close and hold him so fucking tight.

  He does the same. “I’m free of him, Griffon, finally.” His lips graze the shell of my ear. “He’s gone.” He pulls away from me allowing me to see the fierceness in his expression. “He’s dead. Francis is dead.”

  “What happened?”

  His dark hair swishes with the movement as he shakes his head. “They say he shot himself.” He points to his temple. “In the head.” A pained breath leaves him. “My father has never liked guns.” He shudders as if he can’t believe any of what’s happened. “Apparently, he got wind of what was happening and decided to end it all before we could get to him. Fucking bastard always gets to have the final decision.” Ryker smiles. “I really wanted to see his face when he found out I was taking everything from him,” he growls. “I wanted to see the light go out of his eyes and that stupid fucking arrogant expression that was always on his face go up in hot smoke.”

  “I’m sorry.”

  “Yeah, me too.”

  “But you have everything you need, don’t you now?”

  “I have all the money. I have everything Francis ever owned.” He tosses me an adoring look that’s full of so much hope it’s as if he’s begging. “But I wouldn’t say I have everything I need, Griffon.”

  I remain silent.

  Ryker fiddles with his hands. “Where have you been?”

  “Here, not far away, Ryker.”

  Because I’d never leave you…

  He nods. “Oh.”