by Ivy Smoak
Another teacher finally came running over. Screw me. It was Mr. Hill.
“Miss Sanders, principal’s office. Now,” Mr. Hill said with all the authority in the world.
Isabella laughed.
God, why did it have to be Mr. Hill on cafeteria duty today?
“Jason,” my uncle said. “Miss Pruitt started it.”
For the first time ever, I saw Mr. Hill’s demon eyes soften. “Okay, Jim. You too then, Miss Pruitt.”
“But…” Isabella started.
“Don’t make me repeat myself,” Mr. Hill said.
I had never seen him be mean to anyone but me.
“You should probably come too, Jim,” Mr. Hill said. “To let the principal know what actually happened here.”
He nodded.
All four of us started walking out of the cafeteria, but I grabbed my uncle’s arm, holding him back for a second.
“Don’t listen to anything Isabella said. She just hates me.”
“I’m so sorry, kiddo. I never meant for it to come out like that.” He shook his head. “I embarrassed you in front of all your classmates.”
“What? No.”
“You’re literally crying because of what she just told everyone.” He lightly tapped the bottom of my chin to cheer me up like I was a two-year-old that had fallen and scraped my knee. Something about the action made me appreciate him even more.
“I’m crying because I’m angry. Furious. I’d never be embarrassed of you. I love you.” I stopped in the middle of the hall so I could hug him. I thought Mr. Hill would yell at me any second, but his words never came. “I meant everything I said back there.”
I’m pretty sure I heard him sniffle.
“As your guardian I should probably reprimand you for throwing a green bean at another student’s face. But as your uncle…nice aim, kiddo.”
I laughed.
“Let’s go sort this mess out.”
I stayed tucked into his side as we walked the rest of the way to the principal’s office. I really hoped that Isabella’s Prada ass was about to get expelled.
Chapter 28
Friday
Every time I catered, my arms still ached. But I was definitely getting better at it. And fortunately for me, I was pretty sure that tonight’s catered event had been exclusively for old people. There hadn’t been a single person from our school in attendance.
“I’m so tired,” Kennedy groaned as we made our way up the stairs of our apartment building.
“Me too. But at least it’s a good arm work out.”
“What?” she asked when we came to our floor. “No, I’m not talking about work. I’m talking about stupid Isabella. I can’t believe she only got a week’s detention too. She should have been expelled.”
I didn’t disagree with her. The fact that Isabella started it but got the same punishment as me wasn’t really fair. But it wasn’t like I was learning the whole “life isn’t fair” thing for the first time. Honestly, I was surprised she even got in trouble. “I really don’t care.”
“You don’t care? She made fun of you in front of the entire school. And Uncle Jim. She’s such a bitch.”
I shrugged. “But I put her in her place.”
“Yeah, you kinda did. When you threw that green bean at her face I thought she was going to scream.” She started laughing. “The expression on her face was priceless.”
“I should have grabbed Matt’s tray and dumped it on her perfectly coiffed hair.”
“That would have been epic,” Kennedy said with a laugh. “Maybe next time.”
“I’m really hoping there won’t be a next time.” I stopped at my uncle’s apartment door.
“Yeah, me too.”
“Do you want to hang out? Uncle Jim and I are going to rent a movie and I’m going to make popcorn.”
“Homemade? As in that garbage without any butter?”
“That healthy treat without any butter.”
“Um…no thanks. I’m going to scour the internet for the perfect second-hand dress for homecoming. Want me to keep a look out for you too?”
“Yeah. Sure.”
“Where’s your enthusiasm? It’s our first big dance together. We’re going to have so much fun.”
“I haven’t even asked my uncle if I can go yet.”
“Then ask him tonight. I’m sure he’ll say yes. And while you’re at it, freaking ask him if he’s secretly in love with my mom, because the suspense is killing me.”
“I’ll see if I can squeeze that into the conversation,” I said, even though I had no intention of doing that. I just wanted to watch a movie, relax, and forget about today.
“Great. I’ll come by tomorrow and show you some dress options. Have a good night with my soon-to-be father.”
I laughed. “Night, Kennedy.”
My uncle was sitting at the kitchen table doing his crossword puzzle when I came in. He looked up. “Hey, kiddo. How was work?”
“Good. No spills,” I said and gestured to my clean apron.
He smiled. “Ready for that movie?”
“Yeah. Just let me go change real quick.” I hit the lights on in my bedroom and went straight for the closet. I pulled my shirt off as I rummaged around for a clean pair of pajamas.
“Brooklyn?”
I was pretty sure my heart had jumped into my throat or else I would have screamed bloody murder. I turned around. Matt was there. Right in the middle of the bedroom. With his eyes glued to my chest.
Jesus. I threw my arms in front of my bra. “Are you crazy? How long have you been here?”
“I don’t know.” He looked down at his watch. “An hour. Maybe two.”
“My uncle is out there.”
“I’ve been quiet.”
I held up my hand. “You know what? It doesn’t matter. Because you’re leaving. Now.” I marched over to the window and pushed it open.
“Brooklyn…”
“Now,” I said again and gestured to the fire escape. I should have locked my freaking window. But I never thought he’d show up again after today. After he had sat there silently, watching Isabella mock me in front of the whole school. He’d told her about us. He’d lied and said we slept together. He’d been making fun of me behind my back with his friends this whole time.
“I thought you might be upset with me,” he said.
“You thought I might be upset with you?” I said it slowly, like I was trying to comprehend his ridiculous words. “I’m more than upset with you, Matt. You just sat there and let Isabella tear me and my uncle apart. You did nothing. Do you have any idea how that made me feel?” I didn’t wait for a response. “I’m done with you. Get the hell out of my room.”
“I’m sorry about what happened today. I told you I can’t talk to you in front of Isabella. Today was awful, but…”
“There are no buts. I don’t want you to be here. I don’t want to talk. I don’t even want to look at you. Just go.”
He didn’t move. Not an inch.
“Did you or did you not tell all your friends that we had sex?”
“What?” His eyebrows lowered. “No.”
I shook my head. I didn’t believe him. How could I? “Whatever game you’re playing with me is over. I don’t ever want to see you again. Now get the hell out of my room.”
“Brooklyn, I have no idea what you’re talking about.” He finally moved, stepping toward me.
“James told me. Are you really going to stand there and deny that you told all your friends we were sleeping together? Including Isabella?”
“What? Yes, I’m going to deny it. Because it’s not fucking true. And James never would have said that.”
I folded my arms across my chest, trying to cover myself more. “So now you’re calling me a liar? You trust your addict friend over me? I broke up with Felix…for you. I got Felix to stop selling to James…for you. I’ve been sneaking around behind everyone’s backs…for you.
“James isn’t an addict. He’s just g
oing through a hard time.” He ran his fingers through his golden hair, momentarily distracting me.
I turned away from him and picked up the pajama top I’d been looking for earlier. “Now you’re just lying to yourself. My uncle thinks I’m changing. We’re about to watch a movie. If I take any longer he’ll wonder what I’m doing. You have to go.”
“I’m not going anywhere until we talk about this. I’m sorry about lunch. I’m sorry if you heard some rumor that claimed I was telling people we had sex. I’m sorry I didn’t step in to help. I’m so fucking sorry. I don’t know what else I can say.”
He was sorry? I hated when people said that to me after my mom died. Because it didn’t make any sense. And in this case? It didn’t make any sense either. Because there should have been a stronger word than sorry. I’d never accept his lame apology. He could shove his I’m sorry up his ass. “You’re not sorry. You’re defending James when the only reason Isabella knew anything about my personal life was because of him. He was blackmailing me, Matt. Your perfect friend isn’t so perfect.”
“I never said he was perfect. But blackmailing? Really? He’s not Isabella.”
God, I wanted to strangle him. “I saw Felix sell him something other than pot at that party last weekend. James said if I told anyone, he’d let everyone know my secret. And to think I actually tried to stop what happened at lunch today. Because I thought maybe, just maybe, the secret he knew was that you and I were together. And that if he said it in front of Isabella…whatever she had on you would come out too. I tried to fix it. I begged Felix to sell to him again. I’m glad Felix didn’t get to him in time though. Because now I know exactly what kind of person you are.”
“And what kind of person am I, Brooklyn?” His chest rose and fell as he said it, like he was barely holding on to all his pent up anger. But I didn’t care how he felt.
“The kind of person I want nothing to do with.”
He closed the distance between us. “We both know that isn’t true.”
“Go to hell.” I shoved his chest. But as soon as my hand hit the fabric of his shirt, I found myself grabbing hold of it with my fist.
“Make me.”
His lips crashed against mine. Or maybe mine crashed against his. I had no idea. All I knew was that I was furious at him. And somehow this made it better. Or worse. I was pretty sure I had lost my mind.
He groaned into my mouth. That sound that I found so addicting. That sound that made me want to forget all reason.
But I didn’t forget this time. I pulled back. “Stop.” I took a step back from him, trying to get his stupid cinnamon scent to stop swirling around my head. I quickly pulled on the same shirt I’d worn to work. I was pretty sure my face was bright red.
“I really am sorry, Brooklyn. If you say James blackmailed you, I believe you. I’ll talk to him. I’ll get him to leave you alone. You should have just told me.”
And you should have stepped in today during lunch. I closed my eyes and took a deep breath. “Imagine on a scale of one to ten how today made me feel. Now multiply that by ten because every day that I wake up it’s hard to breathe. I’m barely holding on. I didn’t just lose my mom, I lost my best friend. I lost my home. I lost everything.” I wiped the tears from my eyes, angry at myself that they were even there. I wanted to open my eyes to look at him, but I couldn’t. I was worried that if I looked into his eyes I wouldn’t have the courage to keep going. “I’m finally putting myself back together. Mostly because of my uncle’s generosity.” I tried to even my voice. “Maybe if Isabella had just been making fun of me, I could forgive you for doing nothing. But she made fun of my uncle. You could have defended him. He has nothing to do with whatever Isabella has on you. You let her make fun of a bystander. I didn’t sign up for that. And I will never forgive you.”
“I didn’t know Mr. Sanders was your uncle.”
I finally opened my eyes. It was refreshing that he hadn’t called him Janitor Jimbo. But the fact that he had nothing more to say sealed the deal. “Yeah, well you do now. So go ahead. Call him Janitor Jimbo behind my back. Go tell all your friends that you and I are fucking. But if you ever show up at my window again…I’ll…I’ll…push you off the fire escape.”
He smiled. “I know you don’t mean that.”
“I was falling for you, Matt. And I’m too tired to fall anymore. I’ve already hit rock bottom once this year. And I don’t want to hit it again. I can’t hit it again. Because I won’t be able to keep going this time.” Matt’s jacket was still lying on the chair by my bed. I walked over and lifted it up. “So take your varsity jacket and give it to someone you’re not embarrassed to talk to at school.” I shoved it into his chest.
“I’m not embarrassed of you.”
“Really? I needed you to speak up today. Not on my behalf. On my uncle’s. You’re a fucking coward, Matt. I thought I could rely on you.” I shook my head. “Today you found out that I’m the janitor’s niece. And like the rest of the school, you said nothing. But I heard you loud and clear. You can let yourself out.” I left Matt alone in my room.
“You forgot to change,” my uncle said with a laugh.
“I changed my mind. I’m happy exactly the way I am.” I plopped down on the couch beside him. “Now, what movie are we going to watch?”
He lifted up the remote as I settled under a fuzzy blanket. He turned on Wedding Crashers, probably because we’d watched it last week and we’d both laughed so hard. I knew he was trying to distract me from my crappy day. But I couldn’t focus on Vince Vaughn and Owen Wilson’s hilarity tonight.
There was a knock on the door.
“Now who could that be?” My uncle yawned and stood up. “Keep watching, kiddo. I’ll be right back.” He patted the top of my head.
The movie wasn’t funny anymore. It was more about love than I even realized the first time I’d seen it. And I wasn’t in the mood to watch their love stories unfold when I’d just set mine on fire and threatened to push it down the fire escape.
“Mr. Sanders, my name is Matthew Caldwell. We talked on the phone earlier this week. I’m the one your niece is doing that school project with.”
Fucking Matt. He was like the plague. Following me around. Hiding in dark corners. Making me feel like my heart was dying. I’d told him to leave. Not show up at my front door. I paused the movie. But I didn’t know whether to run to the front door and make him leave or just hide out in here.
“Matthew, it’s a little late,” my uncle said. “I think it would be better if you came back tomorrow. Or maybe some other time when you’re not sporting a black eye.”
I breathed a sigh of relief. My uncle would get rid of him for good.
“I know it’s late. And I know Brooklyn is grounded,” Matt said. “But I really like her. And I was hoping to get your permission to take her to homecoming.”
What the hell?
“Does she want to go with you?” my uncle asked.
Go, Uncle Jim! Kick him out!
“I really hope so. But I messed up today. The way Isabella acted at lunch…I should have said something. I should have stepped in. And I’m sorry. I’m not just here to ask you for permission to take Brooklyn to homecoming. I’m here to apologize to you too, Mr. Sanders.”
There was an awkward stretch of silence. I was clutching the remote so hard in my hand that my knuckles were turning white.
“You have nothing to apologize for, Matthew. It was my fault for wanting to keep it a secret it the first place. I was just trying to protect her. You can see how much good that did me.”
Apparently my uncle was a lot better at forgiveness than I was.
He cleared his throat. “But Brooklyn’s been through a lot. And I think she’d appreciate an apology too. Why don’t you come in?”
Traitor! But even as I thought the word, my heart softened. Or maybe it was because Matt appeared in the living room staring at me like he truly was sorry. Sorrier than he had been in my room. I just stared at him.
“Brooklyn, I’m sorry about today,” Matt said. “When Isabella started talking about you and your uncle I should have said something. And I promise if she or anyone else at school is ever mean to you again, I’ll be there. I’ll have your back. You can rely on me.”
He couldn’t promise that. What about the blackmail? I kept my lips pressed together. I couldn’t mention any of that in front of my uncle. It felt like Matt cornered me into forgiveness. He was as asshole-ish as ever.
My uncle cleared his throat, saving me. “I’m going to give you two a minute. I wanted to stop by and talk to Mrs. Alcaraz anyway. I’ll be back.”
I waited for the front door to close before I stood up. “You shouldn’t make a promise you can’t keep,” I said. “And homecoming? Seriously? That doesn’t exactly keep us a secret.”
“But I believe you. If I’d had any idea that James was blackmailing you…screw him. And screw Isabella. I’m done. They deserve each other.”
“Is that whose Isabella’s secret would hurt? James?”
“I’ll tell you everything as soon as I talk to both Isabella and James. What he did to you…I don’t care what excuse he gives. But I owe him this. He’s one of my oldest friends. Hell, he’s one of my only friends. Or at least, he was one of my oldest friends.”
I nodded. I didn’t fault him for wanting to talk to James first. He was loyal to the people he loved. I understood that. I just hoped James didn’t lie to him about what happened. It was my word against his. And I didn’t have sixteen years of friendship with Matt on my side.
“Everyone will know that we’re together by Monday. I promise. So what do you say? Come to homecoming with me?”
I’d already said yes to Felix. But just as friends. If Matt could figure out a way to get out from beneath Isabella’s thumb, I could figure out a way to break the news to Felix. “Okay.”
Matt smiled. “And no more threatening to push me down the fire escape?”