Stigmata

by L M Adams

“I will get to that if you hush.”

  Jack shoves another date at me, “Here, Jae.”

  The boy returned to his village, his body bloody and burned, but his heart full of understanding. There was something new about the boy, all of the villagers saw and so they asked him to share his secret. He knew it was nothing he could give them, so in turn, he promised to lead them to the lands of joy so that they could return and know of its bounty.

  Young and old; child and babe, all of the village came, all would make the pilgrimage to joy. He led them to the mountain and urged them to climb with him, to climb and keep climbing. Many gave up quickly and turned away, the struggle to joy was not worth it to them – better to be unfeeling than to experience this pain. Some perished on the mountain, all in the struggle to find joy and yet never knowing it for themselves. Yet still he urged those that stayed to climb.

  Finally they reached the tree, and he turned back to them smiling with that same triumph, with that same joy. And although some felt the joy with him, others tasted nothing but the bitter ashes on their tongue – and instead of joy they knew of anger.

  “Not every person that struggles through something will emerge with joy?” I whisper sadly.

  Lucien nods.

  The villagers with anger in their hearts grabbed the young boy and carried him to the top of the burning mountain, across the burning and ragged ground, where the air burned their lungs even further. Urged on by their rage they still climbed until they reached the top and threw the boy in.

  “Some people will struggle and hurt… just to see you hurt.” I whisper the lesson and again Lucien nods.

  “God, this is a sad story!” I yell angry that he would give us such a tale.

  “Give her a date, Capaneus.”

  I wave it away, “I’ll hush… finish it.” I pray there’s a happy ending to the story here.

  The ones who had known of joy cried for the very first time at the foot of the mountain, because now they would know of sorrow. The mountain, so moved by their show of emotion, cooled her fires and gathered the spirit of the man to her.

  She promised to give the first peoples all of the emotions they knew of on the mountain so they would never forget the sacrifice the boy made in search of joy.

  “Not really a happy ending.” I mumble.

  Jack glances at me, “It’s about the life lessons, not a happy ending. The people knew of all emotions, we know of all emotions, you can’t have one emotion without the other.”

  Lucien nods, “Very good, Capaneus. We must all recognize the parts of us as they are… both bravery along with cowardice, know bitterness and forgiveness, know love with anger, know of joy and sorrow.”

  I think about the story for a long time as we walk. I have suffered, goddess knows I have, I’ve bought the rights to enough joy for a lifetime I would think. Yet something in my heart tells me that is not how it works… not at all.

  The sun begins to set as we reach where the sands will turn to stone, and Lucien calls an end to our day. He finds a few boulders for us to make camp near. But I want a fire, and I’m determined to find some firewood.

  “Don’t stray too far Wench, it is easy to get lost.”

  I wave a hand in the air as I continue my search. Like Luey would lose me in the desert.

  The night sky does something magical to the sand here, it makes it sparkle like a perfect reflection of the cosmos. I climb a dune so I can enjoy the sight. Standing high I look out to the stretch of land; a carpet of the heavens lays before me.

  I feel smaller and larger than I’ve ever felt before. Like a cog in the massive workings of the universe, but every cog has a purpose, no matter how small.

  The sky is filled with the bright dust of the milky way, the large glow of the moon, the twinkle of stars refracting light in every hue of the color spectrum.

  What I wouldn’t give to be on the back of a horse, arms spread wide as we ride with the wind, what I wouldn’t give to get lost in the nothingness here and never return to the pains of my own life. I try to pull myself away from such dangerous thoughts before they take root.

  Something at the bottom of the dune catches my eye, it’s a dry bush… perfect for kindling. I start down the dune, but in my rush to get to it I end up tripping over my feet and falling.

  My body seems to lose all function as I roll down the large dune. My arms and legs flailing wildly as I roll. I try to bring in my arms to wrap around my head, but before I can get control of myself, I smack into something hard. My head snaps back from the force and the last thing I see before oblivion claims me, is the sparkling sky above me, welcoming me to join them.

  There is a wetness on my side, slimy and odd. My consciousness rises, but everything is out of focus, I’m seeing in double, a very wobbly double. I must have given myself a concussion.

  I try to turn to get to my knees and get up, a sharp pain races up my left leg and cry out in shock.

  Maybe I’m not a supreme goddess after all – or at best I’m the goddess of broken legs. I’m afraid to look at it, but I know it’s bad, my leg is radiating with pain.

  I gather my courage and try to start dragging myself up the dune, but the sand is too loose, and I just end up sliding down the hill again after a few feet, pain racing up my body with every shift. My head spins again and I’m afraid of passing out.

  Even after all of my effort I’m still stuck at the same log, the slimy liquid crawling on my skin. It feels like cold snot.

  Fuck, “Luey!” I scream and hold my breath as I wait for an answer.

  None comes.

  “Luey!” I cry out again, voice cracking with pain and desperation.

  “Wench!” A thunderous roar shakes the earth and I smile.

  “Luey!” I laugh.

  Massive wings of fire appear above me and I reach up towards them with joy in my heart. I knew he’d save me, Luey always takes care of me.

  70

  Jaevia

  I’m vaguely aware of him landing next to me picking me up in his arms. A feeling of weightlessness washes over me as he lifts us up in the air. His massive wings of fire glowing all around us.

  I wrap my arms around his neck, cuddled safely in his arms, as he carries us away from the pit and the smell of death. His wings give off heat, but I know they won’t burn me, I reach out a hand to touch the almost delicate feathers made of fire. A wisp of sparkling gold floats from my fingertips and a gentle heat fills me.

  There’s a deep rumbling in Luey’s chest, he’s mad… or very worried, but being angry is how he deals with worry – loving him has taught me that.

  “I’m sorry, Luey,” I whisper and cuddle on him, rubbing my face on his flesh like a kitten.

  “Hush Wench, just rest.”

  I sigh, I’m going to get it later, but right now I’m hurt, and he doesn’t get to be mad at me when I’m hurt – that’s just not how it works.

  From up high I can see the desert seeming to stretch on for forever. Under the night sky, it feels so wonderfully beautiful. I love it here, even as deadly and dangerous as it is… I love it here.

  I finally spot a small fire… Jack, pacing back and forth in front of it. I guess they found something to burn without me.

  “I didn’t know I had gone that far…”

  “I said hush woman,” Lucien growls low.

  He’s going to give me a spanking… I just know it.

  “Lucien! Jae!” Jack shouts and rushes towards us.

  Luey is a great flyer, but his landing needs work, or carrying me makes it awkward. He sets down and stumbles forward a bit before regaining his balance, almost as if his legs forgot how to work for a moment there.

  Or maybe I still can make his knees weak.

  I grin.

  “And what the hell are you smiling about!?” Jack yells, “We’ve been worried sick! He told you not to go far, he told you!” Jack’s voice cracks, his eyes filled with tears.

  My smile falters, “I’m sorry… I didn’t know…”<
br />
  “Didn’t know what?! That this place is dangerous or how to follow simple fucking directions Jaevia Marie Fontaine Ramzia Knightley!”

  Good god, not my entire legal name.

  “She’s hurt Bloodsucker, we can be angry later.”

  The look on Jack’s face goes back from angry to worried. He snaps into action and waves Luey over to one of the palm-leaf mats. Lucien hobbles badly as he makes his way over to the boulder to set me down gently. Maybe he sprained his ankle in the landing.

  I lean back on the large boulder and finally get a good look at my leg… it’s crooked, bent and not in a natural way… like at the knee.

  Below my knee my tibia is bent in half, either the endorphins or some strange magic is happening because I don’t feel a bit of pain.

  Luey stumbles to the ground beside me groaning, “Fuck,” he whispers. “Hurry up and get her fixed, this hurts like a son-of-a-bitch.”

  “You’re absorbing her pain?” Jack asks as he pulls out his knife.

  Lucien puts an arm over his eyes with a grunt.

  Jack kneels in front of me “I didn’t know you could do that.”

  “I didn’t know either,” Lucien groans low, “but I felt her pain, I felt it in my heart, and I wished for her not to feel it.”

  Jack sighs and looks down at my leg, “I have to set it and then we can get it healed… but I’ve… it’s going to hurt.”

  “Just get it over with!” Lucien yells.

  “Luey…”

  “You hush,” Jack snaps at me.

  I sigh and cross my arms over my chest, I’m the flipping queen, telling me to hush.

  But this is my fault and now Lucien goes and takes my pain for me and I’m grateful, I really am, but I didn’t ask him to do that.

  Jack cuts my pants, starting at the ankle and going up to above my knee… there’s bone poking through my skin… that’s not good. Lucien groans low, trying to hold on to his composure.

  My leg is bleeding less than I thought it would. All in all, as broken legs go, it doesn’t seem to be that bad. They’re making a much ado about nothing.

  “It’s a clean break at least, no shards of bone I can tell. All right,” Jack whispers, “here’s the worst of it.”

  He places a hand behind my knee, gripping it softly, and wraps his other hand around my ankle. He straightens out my leg slowly and Lucien cries out with pain.

  When Jack pulls it out straight, I see the pull, I just don’t feel it, but good god, Lucien does, he roars, and the sound seems to echo through the lands.

  Jack is quick, fitting the two bones back together, he’s done this before it would seem. “Done, it’s done, don’t move Jae.”

  He moves away from me and goes to Lucien, patting the large man on his shoulder. Lucien leans forward into Jack’s chest, “Fuck.”

  “You’re a very good husband, Lucien,” Jack soothes.

  “I could’ve handled it,” I pout.

  “Oh yes, big bad Jaevia, runs off into the fucking desert! Doesn’t need anybody! Doesn’t listen to anyone!” Jack shouts as he pulls back from their embrace and reaches down to Lucien’s pants.

  “Come on, I know you’re hurting, but she needs to feed and you’re the only one powerful enough.”

  Lucien nods quickly.

  “Jack… I…”

  “You what?” He snaps, “He doesn’t stop hurting until it’s healed. You need to feed, and the power has to come from him, I don’t have enough lifeforce to heal that kind of wound!”

  “I could bite him… it would be easier on him.”

  “Feeding as a vampire doesn’t give you the same boost as it does when you feed as a succubus, let’s face it, you’ve always been into the fucking more than the drinking.”

  I finally have the decency to look sheepish. Maybe I could connect to Neoma, commune with the power of the moon… but I don’t really know how to. She comes to me when she wishes and right now… I don’t feel anything. I can use my succubus powers of course… but the only one that has enough mojo to give me a good meal is the same man who’s taking on my pain, so I don’t have to hurt.

  Jack gets Lucien to lay down, “Are you comfortable?”

  Lucien grunts with a nod.

  “Jaevia?”

  I sigh and open myself, I don’t have to reach for Ishtar, for my connection to the power of sex, we are old friends. Before I was the Eventide, the Goddess to Come, or anything else… I was a succubus.

  The air becomes heavy with the scent of lemons and oranges. I relax into the magic and reach out a hand towards Lucien. He grabs it and holds on tightly as Jack gets Lucien’s cock free.

  I feel my power work its way to Lucien’s sacral, the chakra I am most familiar with – the one that holds his sexual power. He groans low as Jack begins stroking his cock.

  My power surges, sensing the heady meal and Lucien whimpers.

  “Gently Jae, you make this as pleasurable as possible for him.”

  I nod and pull back, instead of driving my power into him, I caress him gently with it.

  “Oh,” Lucien breathes out softly.

  “Good,” Jack whispers and lowers his mouth to Lucien’s cock.

  Jack is so gentle as he sucks Lucien in. God it’s sexy watching them together. Watching the long dark, thick, hardness of Luey disappear into Jack’s warm waiting mouth.

  “I like,” Lucien moans and brings up his other hand to cup the back of Jack’s head gently.

  Rapture covers Lucien’s features, the pain isn’t gone, but my power can make pain feel good. Make it feel so fucking good. Jack works Lucien slowly, gently, moving his head up and down. Jack can’t take as much cock in his mouth as I can, but I’ve been sucking Lucien off for a lot longer. Still, Jack knows a thing or two about pleasing Luey and soon I feel the tension and pressure begin to build inside of Lucien, a gathering of power and pleasure behind his sacral.

  “Almost Jae, almost baby,” Luey whispers and I can’t help that I lick my lips.

  Jack begins using his hand to stroke as he sucks, working the thickness of Lucien.

  “Yes,” the large man whimpers and lets out a long moan as he comes and the power transfers from him to me. I get dizzy with the purity of it, the amount of it… the sheer fucking quality.

  He’s always been a good feed, but I wish more. Jack doesn’t stop sucking, demanding more for me, filled with my fucking will!

  “Serve me!” I rage, my goddess coming to fruition, in me, in them – together, apart and as one.

  “No more!” Lucien roars but Jack keeps sucking and Lucien’s body tenses suddenly, coming again, driven forward by my power and Jack’s mouth… against his will.

  His large frame begins to tremble, “No,” he moans but Jack doesn’t stop sucking and I don’t stop feeding. I want it all!

  I drive my power into him, and he screams a broken sound as I force another orgasm from him painfully. I can feel my energy tightening his sack, forcing it to produce more, give me more! I could drain his entire life force from him with a thought.

  I force him to worship me and the meal becomes better, heavier. My lips are not upon his flesh, yet I can taste the honeyed thickness of his come on my tongue. My leg heals instantly, my bone fuses back together, the tear in my flesh where the bone protruded through, knits right before my eyes.

  Still, I could take more, I could wish more, I could drain him dry and rule upon the earth for a thousand years – but yet. I love him, I love him unto the breaking of the moon and the sun – he is the Lucifer to my Lilith, the Atum to my Ishtar, the Sun to my Moon, the Lucien to my Jaevia – he is.

  I let out a shuddering breath and Lucien lets go of my hand as Jack lets Lucien’s cock slip from his mouth.

  He pushes up to one arm, breathing heavily, “How are you feeling?”

  Lucien groans and sits up, moving back to lean on the boulder. “I’ll be fine, a little tuckered out is all.”

  Jack nods, fixing Lucien’s pants, “You rest, I’ll warm
up some food for you.”

  Lucien nods and closes his eyes, leaning his head back on the boulder. Jack stands up and moves to the sled of supplies, I sit beside Lucien feeling like a dumbass.

  “I’m sorry,” I whisper looking down at my ruined jeans. They’re covered in a hard, gray substance – like concrete… I’m not sure what it is. I begin picking at it with my fingernails.

  Lucien sighs and reaches over, patting my leg gently, “There, there, Wench… I’ll beat you later.”

  Just like that, I know he forgives me. But maybe he shouldn’t. Maybe if Lucien would just stay angry at me and hate me every now and again, I’d… I don’t know – get my shit together?

  But that’s not how he works, Luey never stays mad at me for long.

  I glance at Jack as he gathers a portion of salted croc meat and sweet dates, “I’m sorry to you too.”

  He huffs, “That cute little baby girl act doesn’t work on me.”

  “Hey!” I shout.

  He stands up, “Oh shut up, you know good damn and well you’re sorry right now but by the end of tomorrow you’ll be right back to doing some dumb shit.”

  Lucien chuckles, and then laughs aloud, the sound echoing in the desert. I cross my arms over my chest and have a good pout, I’m the flipping queen.

  “Oh god Capaneus, you do not know the half of it.” Lucien opens his eyes taking the palm leaf ‘plate’ Jack hands to him. “We couldn’t have been more than, I don’t know thirteen or fourteen… She used to be afraid of heights, and others began to notice and then they began to tease her… well the Wench couldn’t have that. And so she decides she wants to ‘show off’ – decides to free scale the House of Wôdan…”

  “Wait, the tallest building in the city?” Jack pauses.

  Lucien nods, laughing, and pops a sweet date in his mouth. “No rope and no cuff mind you! She falls, she’s dead… everyone tried to stop her…”

  “… everyone but you,” I add in in a whisper.

  He nods, “Aye, I knew your heart even then. You would not rest until you had done it; until you had conquered your fears and proven to everyone else, you’d conquered them as well.”